Felix: hey man, uh

Felix: thanks again for having me over the other night.

[TXT:] lmao yikes

[TXT:] only thing i remember thinking was that you’d change ur perfume 

[TXT:] totally a good thing i didnt put my hands down ur pants. 

[TXT:] its ok i can handle her

[TXT:] i mean i’ve had to deal with anderson for four whole years right??? lmao

Zelda continued to fill the small, plastic bags with weed, making sure to put the right amount into each. Bagging marijuana to sell to people was probably the only thing she was extremely pedantic over, not to mentions serious, so she took a while to respond to her girlfriend. Zelda was a woman of many talents, or so she liked to think, but multi-tasking wasn’t one of them. Even she could admit to that. Zip-locking the bag she’d been stuffing, she set it into the box and looked up. “Uhh, why shouldn’t there be a vine of you singing in the shower?” Zelda shrugged. She wasn’t about to say how she’d nearly died from laughter at Tatum’s attempts to hit Mariah Carey’s high notes. Tatum genuinely thought she could hold a tune, and Zelda wasn’t in the business of crushing dreams. Unless those dreams were stupid, and belonged to someone like James, or Felix, or, if she was feeling particularly suicidal, Zoe’s. Not that she ever got very far with the latter. “Besides! It’s gone viral. People fucking love it. They’re even making remixes of it. Look at this one, it’s fucking hilarious.” Pulling her mobile out from her back pocket, she pulled up a vine and scooted over on the sofa to make room for her girlfriend. Zelda was already grinning even before the video had loaded. “You can thank me later.”

[TXT:] man the last time we watched ancient aliens high i cried for like

[TXT:] an hour because everything giorgio tsoukalos was sayin was so tru

[TXT:] we really are part human part extra-terrestrial 

[TXT:] almost?????? what the fuck stopped me!

Zelda’s brows shot up so fast into her hairline that it was a wonder whether they would ever come back down again. “It literally happened yesterday!” She held out her arms as if to further illustrate the extent of her exasperation. “You tied me to the bed and left me there for five hours, dude! I was in my underwear!” Aside from the very obvious reason as to why she’d be annoyed by that, she was also severely disappointed that the tying up of her wrists to the bedposts hadn’t been the start of some very kinky sex. Tatum had gotten Zelda’s hopes up in a matter of moments, then crushed them in the same breath. She would have been alright with it if her girlfriend had only left her for five minutes, ten minutes tops. But Tatum had effectively abandoned Zelda for hours, and it’d been cold. “Have you ever tried holding your arms up above your head for five hours straight? Fucking hurts, you know! Ben came in and took selfies with me, asshole.”

[TXT:] oh come on!! its STAR WARS

[TXT:] STAR WARS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[TXT:] cmon. we can touch each other afterwards???

[TXT:] itll be just this once

[TXT:] star wars is important to me tatum