#syorp

Rumor says you were born with a spear in hand and a mouth full of shark teeth. After careful examination with the help of copious amounts of alcohol and a debate that quickly resorted to fists, you have long since concluded that not even your mother's womb (purportedly made of iron and hellfire) could have weathered such a storm. Thus, the pirate Asher Gaynesford was born a soft, squishy baby, as was his sister. How disappointing. Not that it matters. You tell everyone who will listen to you (as well as those who don't) that not only were you born with both spear and teeth, but that yes, you were also an insufferable piece of shit and devilishly handsome at the same time. Some of them even believe you. You think.