#swisscheesits

Here is an excerpt that I wrote for the Snow Queen Au. You can also check it out on ao3. Let me know what you think!

Technoblade opened his eyes and was greeted with the sight of his rickety wooden ceiling. It's been 4 hours, and he still couldn't get to sleep. He spent the entire time tossing and turning in his bed, trying to get comfortable to no avail.

It was just too cold.

He never had a great tolerance for the cold, but it was never this bad. Techno chalked up this newfound sensitivity to the illness he caught about a week ago when he was playing in the snow with Ranboo. He never saw that tiny shard of glass coming.

Luckily, besides the overwhelming pain and slight bleeding it caused, it didn't severely damage his eyeball. Maybe it just grazed it, seeing as Ranboo couldn't find any remnants in his eye.

Yet, despite surviving such an obvious attempt on his life, the universe couldn't let him off too easily.

He had a pretty nasty cold, and he wasn't getting any better.

Techno gently shook his head to clear his depressing thoughts and sat up in his rock-hard bed.

A few feet away lay Ranboo, sleeping carelessly away in his own bed, letting out soft snores. At the very least, it didn't seem like he caught whatever Techno had. Ranboo was already in enough danger by living in a tundra that was constantly snowing. Techno didn't want to add to that.

Techno felt a small smile creep onto his face before he flinched in pain. He quickly pressed a hooved hand against his chest and pushed, making sure to breathe deeply to lessen the ache.

After a few seconds, it disappeared leaving only echoes of pain behind.

Sighing, Techno begrudgingly peeled his blanket off and got up from the bed. Immediately, he started to violently shiver from the cold but was determined to complete his goal.

The reason why he couldn't sleep was that the roaring fire that was lit a few hours prior had been sadly snuffed out. Techno knew that he should have gotten more firewood before nightfall, but at the time he was lazy and didn't consider the repercussions of his actions.

He was certainly feeling it now.

Well, no time like the present. If he didn't get any firewood, he won't be the only person to suffer.

Quickly, Technoblade began to pull on 3 of his warmest sweaters and double-layered his pants and socks. He was still cold, but at least he wasn't shivering.

Slipping on his ice-resistant boots and heavy red cloak, Techno grabbed his axe and opened the outside door. He made sure to close it firmly on his way out.

There were many things that sucked about living in a snow-covered remote village where everyone feared you and your ward. However, the sights were definitely one of a kind.

Blizzard season hasn't started yet, so the sky was clear of any clouds. Maybe it was Techno's imagination, but the stars seemed to twinkle more during nights like these. Instead of the freezing, hardened snow that came from the harsh conditions, Techno was treated to the carefree, powdered sugar consistency that kids loved to roll around in.

Techno let out a small breath, seeing it appear directly in front of his face. He did it a few times, trying to see if he could change its shape as if he was smoking a pipe, but quickly realized that he was getting off track.

With a crack of his neck to dispel the tension that was growing due to the chill, Techno made his way to the forest that was a few hundred feet away from his and Ranboo's cabin. Once he arrived, he found a few scraggly-looking trees and began chopping them down. Raising his axe, he heaved it to its side and it collided with the trunk with a dull thud. This continued until the tree fell to the ground.

" There we go. Take that tree. No one is a match for Technoblade," Technoblade said to himself.

He made quick work of cutting the tree into smaller logs that he can fit in his house. Using a net, he placed the freshly chopped logs inside and heaved them over his shoulder. Dragging them through the snow will make them wetter, which is not what he wanted if he needed a fire.

Techno decided that the tree provided just enough wood for him to last the night. It would be best to get more tomorrow with Ranboo.

Just as Techno finished wrapping the net securely around the logs, he noticed that it had started to snow. In fact, it started to snow incredibly hard.

" Oh no," Techno groaned, realizing his mistake.

Just because blizzard season wasn't here, doesn't mean that there couldn't be any blizzards. And it seems like one was developing right now. Blizzards were dangerous. They were cold, brutal, and blinding. You could be 5 feet away from your house and wouldn't even know it.

Technoblade was more than 5 feet away from his cabin.

Techno rushed out of the forest as fast as he could, but he was weighed down by both his axe and the logs. Just as he exited, the blizzard picked up speed and intensity, leaving Techno basically blind.

Techno rapidly took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down.

" Okay, it's okay. I'm definitely not going to die here, nope. The forest is right in front of the cabin. All I need to do is keep going forward and I will eventually reach it," Techno thought. He slowly began to move his way forward.

Each step felt like he was moving through tar. His bones were freezing and besides the howling wind, all that Techno could hear was his teeth chattering.

5 minutes turned into 10 minutes. 10 minutes turned to 15 minutes.

Needless to say, Techno felt that his situation was starting to get dire. Thank God he wasn't having a coughing or sneezing fit right now, but who knows how long that streak of luck will last?

The cold was starting to affect his head. It felt as if someone in his skull was violently beating against it with a hammer.

Suddenly, as if the Gods felt pity for poor Technoblade, he saw a yellow light appear a few feet in front of him.

Ranboo must have noticed that he was gone and turned on the lights in their cabin.

With a near-manic grin on his face, Techno felt a burst of energy enter his body and he started to jog toward the light. As he got closer to it, he noticed a shadowed figure start to materialize in front of him.

This made Techno frown in concern.

" Ranboo! What are you doing outside? Get back in! You're going to get hurt-"

" What's a Ranboo?" the shadowed figure asked.

Techno stopped running when he heard the voice. Squinting, Techno realized that there was no way that shadow was tall enough to be Ranboo.

Ranboo also didn't have a Northern accent.

The light started to get closer to him. In his confusion, Techno didn't move as he watched the figure approach him, holding an ornate silver lantern.

It didn't take long for them to be standing face to face.

It was a man. A blond man with shoulder-length hair, striking ice-blue eyes, and a scruffy beard on his chin. Seeing that he had wings, Techno could tell he wasn't human. However, besides the wings, the man didn't have any out-of-the-ordinary features.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. His clothing sure was strange.

He was wearing a white button-up shirt, black slacks, and long-laced leather boots. On his hands, he wore black silk gloves with an assortment of rings on his fingers. The only warm thing on the man would be his very fluffy white coat that was so long it dragged across the snowy floor. The green and white striped bucket hat clashed with all of his outfit, but it suited him in a weird way.

How this guy wasn't a popsicle astounded Techno. Maybe he had a high tolerance for the cold.

A very high tolerance.

They both stared at each other for a few seconds, Techno in awkward awe, and the man... Techno wasn't quite sure. Maybe he was also confused at seeing a pigman with an axe at 3 in the morning. Then again, he didn't look confused. He seemed... happy? He was smiling, but Techno wasn't sure if the smile was genuine or if that was the man's default.

He was thinking about this too hard.

Seeing as how the man wasn't planning on doing anything, Techno cleared his throat and said, " Er, Ranboo is my... roommate. I thought you were him, but... you aren't."

The man tilted his head to the side like a cat. His hair moved, allowing Techno to see that one of his ears was pierced with a sapphire earring.

" No, I am not a Ranboo. My name is Philza. What is your name?"

Techno didn't see the harm of giving this man his name, since maybe this would be a good segway for him to leave. The man might have been fine in the cold, but Techno wasn't.  

Already, he could feel his chest start to tighten.

" My name is Technoblade. Listen, I'm in a bit of a hurry. If you saw my cabin, can you point me in the direction of it?"

" Why?" the man, Philza, asked innocently.

Techno felt his confusion grow.

"... Because it's cold and I want to take shelter. Also, Ranboo is waiting for me and I have firewood. I rather not have him freeze to death. He owes me 6 years of rent money."

Now it was Philza's turn to look confused.

" You don't want to stay in the cold? You rather return to your crumbling dwellings with a person that depends on you completely without giving you any form of compensation?"

" I mean, that's kind of a rude thing to say."

At first, Techno felt a bit annoyed at what Philza said. Then, he realized that they were getting nowhere in this conversation and that Philza might have been a bit out of it from being out in the snow without any proper protection.

" Hey man, my cabin isn't too far from here. You can stay with Ranboo and me until the snow clears up. You're probably freezing to death right now. We can talk more when we reach the cabin," Techno said, feeling a bit awkward about inviting a complete stranger into his home. But it didn't feel right to just leave this guy here. He didn't look anywhere near prepared to survive in such a harsh environment.

Philza stared blankly at Techno. Suddenly, both his hands shot out and grabbed Techno's face.

Techno shouted in surprise and found himself being physically dragged down to meet Philza's eyes.

Before he could ask what the hell the man was doing, his breath caught in his throat.

Philza's eyes bore into his soul. The cold around Techno disappeared completely. All that he could focus on was those ice-blue eyes. The longer he stared at them, the more his chest felt frozen. The world around him didn't matter. Ranboo didn't matter. He didn't matter. All that mattered was looking into those eyes-

Techno was forced to close his eyes when a series of coughs wracked his frame. In his moment of lucidity, he blindly pushed against Philza, causing him to stumble back. He let go of Techno's face.

Techno fell to his knees as he continued to cough, saliva pooled rapidly into his mouth and dripped grossly onto the snow. His head felt hot, but the rest of him felt cold.

What was happening to him?

" You were telling the truth."

Techno quickly looked up to see Philza kneeling above him, blue eyes wide with amazement and excitement. He had a wide grin on his face.

It made Techno feel scared.  

" You want to go back home. I see it in your heart. Despite how miserable that cabin is, how terrible this village treats you, you love that house and you love that child, Ranboo, was it? More than that, there's something quite special about you. My snowflake isn't affecting you the way I thought it would, despite it still being in your eye."

" Snowflake?" Techno croaked out before he was wracked with more coughs and shivers.

" Yes," Philza rested his cheek against his hand as he continued to watch Techno struggle below him, " You were supposed to embrace the cold and crave it. The cold in your heart would cause you to lose your emotions, and then it would freeze your body. It seems, in fact, you're doing the exact opposite."

It took a few seconds for Techno to realize just what Philza was talking about.

The glass shard to his eye when he was playing with Ranboo.

Techno's eyes shot open as horror smashed into him like a freight train.

There was a legend that the villagers whisper around this time of year. A legend about a man who, every few decades, chooses his victims by blowing a snowflake into their eyes, blinding them from feeling the warmth of their loved ones and blocking them from feeling warmth for others. It would cause their hearts to grow cold until eventually, they turn into ice statues, serving the man for all eternity after he takes them away to his kingdom made of ice and snow.

The legend of the Snow King.

Techno didn't pay too much mind to the legend. While they fascinated him, he didn't believe in fairytales and when Techno and Ranboo first arrived here all those years ago there was nothing about this village that screamed 'haunted by a mad immortal supernatural being of unknown power'.

Seeing is believing, and Techno would be a fool if he ignored all the facts pointing to a very obvious answer.

This stranger was the Snow King, and he was incredibly screwed.

Techno struggled to get up, but his limbs were too weak, not that it will stop him.

He wasn't going to die like this.

He slowly started to crawl forward, away from the king and away from this situation.

" Where are you going?" the king asked.

" Home," Techno grunted out, "your invitation has been revoked just so you know."

Before he could even crawl an inch away, Techno felt a hand wrap around the collar of his coat and yank him up. Right away, he began to wiggle around to dislodge the grip, but the king didn't budge. He began to half carry half drag Techno with one hand towards a certain direction. The lantern that he carried with him swung back and forward with each step.

" Let me go! I'm not going to become one of your creepy statues for all eternity! That would put a major wrench in my plans to become a billionaire."

Techno continued to struggle until his eyes caught a glimpse of his cabin. A scant few feet away from it was a massive, silver sleigh. In front of it attached by leather reigns stood 8 huge, majestic-looking caribou.

Techno was shocked silent until the king all but tossed him into the back of the sleigh. He landed on the leather seats with a grunt.

He tried to get up, but the king simply pushed him back down with one hand.

" Don't worry, mate. It would be a crime to transform you into another ornament for my collection."

Just as hope began to rise in Techno's chest, it was immediately squashed when Philza flashed him a mischievous grin.

" Just as much of a crime as letting you go, that is."

" You're such a jerk," Techno wheezed. He tried to push his way up, but the king was too strong and he was too weak.

Philza chuckled in amusement as he watched Techno try to get up only for him to cruelly push him down again.

" Now, now. While I admire your determination, there's no use in struggling now. We'll be in the sky soon, and I'd rather you not tumble out of the sleigh and fall to your death."

" Make me, you discount Santa Clause," Techno said as he glared at this massive annoyance in front of him.

The king lifted a brow before placing his palm over Techno's head, covering both of his eyes.

" Good idea."

That was the last thing that Techno heard before pain quickly gathered in his right eye socket.

He was gone before he could even scream

.~:':~.

Philza let out a sigh of relief when the boy finally stopped struggling. Cautiously, he lifted up his hand. Techno was out cold. It was still his snowflake after all. While there were some things that were out of his control, he was able to accomplish that much.

Philza was about to make his way toward the front of his sleigh before he noticed something. Even in sleep, Techno continued to shiver.

He felt a tugging sensation in his chest. It was a feeling that he thought he lost forever.

After a few seconds of deliberation, Philza slowly slipped off his fur coat and draped it around Techno, arranging him so that he was laying evenly on his back in the comforter of the sleigh.

Out of habit, Philza gently brushed his hand across Techno's fluffy hair, moving it away from his closed eyes.

Philza stayed like this for a while, staring at Techno as he stewed in the emotions that he was feeling. Eventually, however, he sighed and got up.

It was time for him to return home. While it wasn't exactly what he was expecting, he got what he came for.

Philza slid up to the front and took his seat. He gripped the reigns and, with one snap of them, caused the caribou to settle.

He closed his eyes and imagined.

He imagined the wind in his hair and snowflakes whipping across his face.

He imagined the smell of ozone and the sight of his breath forming wispy clouds in front of him.

He imagined happy giggles and cool hands cupping his face. Warm brown eyes crinkled happily as they stared deeply into his own.

His eyes snapped open and, suddenly, they were flying.

Careful to keep control over the sleigh so it wasn't shaking too much in the air, Philza took the time to take in his surroundings.

The sky itself was a beautiful place, but the winter skies were breathtaking.

The stars sparkled the prettiest during winter, and the heavens only blessed his domain with the magical light which spanned from mountains to oceans.

His wings ached to touch the sky once more.

He ignored this by turning his attention to his newly required package.

Safe and secure. He could see Techno snuggle deeper into his coat before stilling once again.

With a grin, the Snow King, commander of the Aurora Borealis, ruler of the Winter realm, and Champion of the Stars snapped his reigns once more, causing the sleigh to fly faster.