I do the same fucking shit everyday. Everyday feels like Sunday. I cannot escape. My mind is sick. My mind is fucking sick. I am not satisfied with anything. I do not care about progressing in my life. Throughout my life I cared about people who did not care about me. No one truly cares anyway. Life is just a waste of time. My life especially. Even though my family says they care, deep down, they do not. Friends will come and go. You know my fucking life is a joke and I’m truly lost in life. My friend saved my life. My friend saved my fucking life. It’s getting less stressful and crazy now but I’m still lost. I see the fake humans and their fake smiles with their fake love. I’ll fucking kill all of them. I am not crazy. I truly am not. The only reason I am alive is because of the people who were there for me when I was crying desperately for help. Help. Help. My real family is dead to me. But I will always love them. They didn’t want to accept the fact that I was fucked up. You’re not depressed. You’re not sad. You’re wasting your time, they didn’t get it until it was over. I saw everything before it happened. No one cared until they saw me progressing. Losing my friends was the best thing that ever happened to me. Now people come in my life, I am very grateful for them and everyone around me. I constantly get let down. I always get let down. Maybe because I expect so much from people who truly don’t give a fuck about me. I get attached to people I shouldn’t have. I expect too much. Might as well say fuck em, and fuck it. I’ll die alone. Hahaha. I’m such a fucking pussy. Depressed. Hopeless. Well, at least I know I am.
whoisaleksa.tumblr.com
