ineedyou
word count: 1.7k+
rating: m
genre: drama, mystery, smut, romance, sad
warnings: dark themes, smut, talk of suicide and depression
pairing: johnny x reader
pt.8
authors note: this scene is super short but I wanted to split it up from the smut one,, :)
you were driving over to johnnys dorm at 11 p.m for one of many reasons. the most important one is dealing with the fact that two nights ago you had confessed to johnny about your old girlfriend that you still love and how you cant fully love him until you let her go.
the other fact is that after you cried in his arms and fell asleep with dried tears on your eyes still in his grip.
when that happened, in the morning you had woken up before him. and you sat up and stared at his resting face thinking long and hard about your priorities and morals.
that did absolutely nothing and just left you really confused and tired. so you decided to fall back asleep. when you laid down, in his sleep johnny pulled you towards himself and placed his forehead against yours.
you smiled softly, watching this all too familiar scene play out in front of you.
when you remembered jisoo, you didn't remember her placing her forehead against yours in the midst of a deep sleep, or the way she'd laugh with her whole face and try to convince you to throw chocolate into her mouth from across the kitchen even though she never once caught it.
you only remember her absence, your crippling pain and what hers must of been like.
you decided when thinking about it, that that's no way to live. and un fare for you to remember jisoo in such a horrible way when she was the exact opposite.
so for the sake of you both, you have to move on.
when you drive to his house and confess this, you don't expect johnny to kiss you in his doorway or understand why you changed your mind so quickly. but you really like him and know you have to try and resolve this issue.
when you knocked on his dorm door, you weren't shaking or nauseas.
because your days of nausea and crying were behind you, you had moved on with as much bravery and strength as you could muster.
"y/n?"
johnny looks so shocked to see you outside.
"hi" you whisper.
"um, please come in"
he gestures still surprised from your sudden arrival.
"I need to talk to you." you confess as soon as the door shuts behind you.
"sure, anything you want" johnny whispers concerned.
"come into my room so we don't wake the boys."
you nod and follow johnny, collecting your thoughts.
the door shuts as a low set lamp light illuminates the beautiful shadows of johnnys face and yours alike. he waits for you to say something, anything.
"I choose you." you whisper uneven.
" I cant hold onto the past like I was. I need a real future with someone johnny.
I need you."
he doesn't react at first and stands there like stone in the dark room. then all of a sudden he barrels towards you and wraps his long arms around, gripping you in a warm hug as he kisses you passionately.
hes so happy, hes so happy that you want to be with him and that he gets to be with such you.
"does this make me your girlfriend?" you question lightly in his ear.
he pulls away so he can look at your soft face.
"can it?" he questions full of hope.
you nod twice smiling as he hugs you again, grinning into your hair.
"what now?" johnny questions after you both lay back on his bed, slightly exhausted from all of the excitement.
"I think its too late for you to drive home so you can have the couch again-"
you shut him up by steam rolling ontop of him.
"I have a better idea." you whisper.
because another fact, is that you had been insanely horny before you drove over, and expect to finish what was started the other night.
johnnys expression turns dark, matching yours.
"if you insist," he moans in a low tone.
"oh I do." you reply with a smirk.
all traces of sadness and confusion had long left your body. all you have left is desire.
desire for a man who is right in front of you.
pt. 9
