#sub m

of course! and i hope i'm being right in assuming based on our talk that you would want both straight up femdom and more subdued dom f/sub m dynamics when you say fxm.

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the first thing that comes to mind is my favorite manwha who deals with the topic of actual bdsm: moral sense (aka love and leashes) [MAL / AL / MU]:

A seemingly clean cut office worker keeps his BDSM sexual fantasies to himself—until he discovers his co-worker a potential dominatrix? As they spend their time together, slowly understanding one another, the two end up having a rather unique master and servant relationship.

ji-hoo might not be the classic example of male lead masculinity we are used to seeing in manwha or manga, but for realistic korean standards, he's pretty much a dreamboat (definitely not in the pretty boy category). i would still say he's cute because i mean, he is a sub. but considering how tall and competent and charming in a every-day good-at-talking way, i'd say he's a prime example of the gap moe you're looking for.

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going in a different direction, with a manwha that is way more subtle in the role rev/ersal-type of dynamic: agassiwa ureongchonggak (the lady and her butler) [MAL / AL / MU]

Lim Sooha is an independent woman who has it all: a busy career, a brand-new home, and an ever-growing pile of household chores. And the last thing she needs is a man to mess things up. But that all changes when one walks through her front door–literally! Homeless and desperate for a break, Taesoo begs Sooha to let him stay in exchange for keeping house. Tempted by the idea of coming home to a warm meal, clean sheets, and ironed clothes, Sooha agrees after Taesoo shows just how capable he really is…and claims to be gay. Could this be the perfect arrangement, or will Taesoo’s lie and Sooha’s conflicted feelings make a bigger mess?

Taesoo is a big big softie in the muscled tall body of a guy with a sharp sullen face. he's somewhat of a gentle quiet giant, except his character is deeper than that (it's a good manwha!). sooha may be a bit too closed-off to be called a dominant type, but she's no shrinking violet in the relationship either (in portuguese we might say she's just a bit of a 'locked' person, physically speaking to illustrate a particular disposition). i still tagged it as 'role rev' because, especially with this premise, it's something pretty apparent in how they both conduct themselves in their arrangement and relationship. even though i don't tag this one as 'dom f', i'm pretty sure she's still kind of assertive in the relationship in the moments that count. and honestly, i think i read this one before started this blog and it was a bit hard to tag so many manga i had read throughout my life only going by my memory of them. upon a re-read she might very well be dom haha.

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going back to manga where the girl straight up doms him, we have souiu koto nara, watashi ga. ("if that's the case, then i'll do it") [MAL / AL / MU].

Kana Nagase (28) is the daughter of the company president, and she works as an ordinary office lady at her father's company. She has been in a secret relationship with her boss, Haruhiko Shindo (40), but she was worried that he has yet to make a move on her. (the rest of this synopsis was pretty badly translated, so i'm not including it to confuse folks.)

i don't have that much to say about this one because it's pretty short, but i'm sure it's like what you're looking for. done by a great mangaka who also wrote a manga i have a lot of love for (mori no takuma-san) and one i've been meaning to read for ages! (usotsuki lily. fr i VOW to start this one before the end of the year!!)

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not sure if you've seen around my blog already, but onnanoko ga daicha dame desu ka? (ladies on top) [MAL / AL / MU] is also a she straights up doms him manga.

Mizuki seems like an ordinary office lady–tidy, cute, quiet, and looking for Mr. Right–but while she yearns for love, she’s left cold by traditional romances where men take the lead. Then, at the age of 24, Mizuki discovers Shinomiya, a seemingly perfect guy at the office who likes aggressive women, and something awakens within her. Together, Mizuki and Shinomiya learn that reversing traditional gender roles can be both liberating and exciting, especially in bed!

i would say he is 'masc' only or mostly in a japanese man kind of way (not to stereotype, but they do have different standards). it's particularly hard for him at first to give in because he is seen as such a successful man very on top of things (ha).

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i haven't done any edits yet to showcase it, but you can trust me that uri jibe wae wanni (who invited you?) [MAL / AL / MU] perfectly fits into the idea of a dominant girl and submissive guy without even touching on anything close to femdom: it's ye usual korean romcom manwha. one that i really love 🫶

Jade is told that her childhood friend from China is going to stay at her house. Yet, the grown man who arrives at her door is no longer the sweet boy from her distant memories, rather far from it. As she struggles to re-adjust to their new life together, will she rediscover her childhood crush or simply kick him to the curb?

unfortunately some people seem to have a disliking for the female lead in earlier chapters, but i was definitely not one of them. i love when the female lead is wilful maybe to a bit of a forceful, unwelcome (? more to the readers used to subservient always-nice women than the actual guy in question) degree; call it a flaw, i still love it haha i love the way she teases him in this playful but also borderline flirtatious degree and i love the way she thinks he is so cute. now, is he masc? liu yun is a bit more to the softer side (especially after his makeover. what a cute guy), but that gap moe you're after could easily be found here because he is still a closed-off serious person, but when jae gets under his skin there is nothing he can do hahaha i love it. honestly, they might be the couple i would want to get in a relationship with the most.

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another short one: waka danna wa, konzen koushou dekimasen. (pixie love) [AL / MU]

Masanari Yukimura is master of the hotel Yukitsubaki, which has been in business for 120 years. Being the only heir to the hotel, he needs a wife to start a family with, but there's a problem… he's so sensitive that the slightest tactile sensation gets him hard and coming. He's so afraid to scare girls away that he never gets very far with them. Meanwhile, the pixie who's been guardian of the hotel all these years decides she's the only one who can help him… by getting him used to touch!! A hot romcom with an uptight hotel master and a gorgeous-but-inexperienced pixie.

in terms of the sex scenes, i'm a huge fan of the way it starts: she really, really doms him and it's so satisfying to see this older proper guy be so undone by her hands. by the end, he's a bit more assertive during sex, but considering it was during particular scenes where he wanted to prove his feelings for her, i didn't really mind it, even though i missed the form of the early action. but he's still pretty vulnerable to his feelings for her and it's cute to see a man like him be in love so i thought i'd mention it.

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in ojou-sama ga mamorasete kurenai (my lady won't let me protect her) [MAL / AL / MU], a young lady is what people would call very competent and suave and princely and she's so good at being her own dashing superhero her bodyguard is vexed but also in love with her. read this a long while ago and wished the author would have done a bit more romance-wise, but i think it was still a nice read.

Ichika Kiryuin is the only daughter of a large corporation while Hayama Shuzuku was born into the Samurai family, that worked as bodyguards for generations and was taught to live only as a disposable shield. Hayama was ready to guard and protect Ichika, but as it turns out, Ichika, who has a strong physique, will be the one protecting him!

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i haven't been able to finish seishun no hekireki (a sudden incident in my youth) [MAL / AL / MU] but as far as i read, it's pretty much consistent that she is the dominant one in this relationship whether they are in their original bodies or body-swapped:

"If I'm not attracted to the things that most girls are attracted to… Is there something wrong with me?" Amane Shizuku has been worried about a possible sexual frigidity. She can fall in love with men, she's even dated some of them, but when things were about to go to the next level, her heart didn't throb at all. Due to this matter, she was about to give up on love, but when she meets the popular Kouki, her world changes… literally!!

he's a typical dashing high school cool guy, but she def shows him who's boss lmao

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if you're in the mood for straight up smut/borderline H (aimed at women), there is also agassiwa maid (lady & maid) [AL / MU]

An enormous fortune, a beautiful sprawling estate, and five adoring male maids… what more could a gal wish for? Yeon-Hwa Lee is living out every girl's fantasy when she suddenly inherits her grandfather's estate, including his five loyal servants. Bom and Yeong-Ho are so cute and adorable, Alexander is buff and sexy, while Won-Hu and Edward are elegant and cool. Their only desire is to service their mistress… and Yeon-Hwa simply can't resist.

yes, she fucks literally all of them as it's a harem manga, but it doesn't have any "final choice" as they're all her lovers. some of them are fem and some of them are masc and as said, this is just an ero manwha.

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now for another one of my absolute favs, takane to hana (takane & hana) [MAL / AL / MU]

Sixteen-year-old Hana Nonomura is forced to be the substitute for her older sister Yukari at a miai: a meeting between two people considering an arranged marriage. Hana's prospective suitor turns out to be the handsome heir of the wealthy Takaba company, Takane Saibara, who is 10 years her senior. He promptly shows disdain toward Hana and, in response, she tells him that she is equally unimpressed by his status and personality. Hana believes that her actions at the meeting should have put an end to the discussions about marriage with Takane. To her surprise, not only does the man want to proceed with negotiations but he also starts to show interest in her! This is just the beginning of a special relationship between two polar opposites!

this manga NEVER drops the ball. this tall rich and handsome business guy is an absolute sub and this tiny & funny high school girl is an absolute dom. both in a very comedic, but very present way. this man absolutely thrives under and loves hana's upper hand on him, even if he thinks like he wants to win (he is described by the author herself as an M who thinks he is an S). her absolute disdain at his immature quips and she way she puts him in his place was what sparked his interest in her. not in a virgin raise wa tanin ga ii kinda way, but in a chad takane to hana way hahaha it also never touches on actual dominance and submission but it still surprised me how hana at one point has a conundrum of the clash between being in a vulnerable state of being In Love but also maintaining her dominant position (because don't get me wrong, they both get off on it). and macacos me mordam, she actually DOES keep it. her way of accepting it and him into her life is still very Hana and i don't know how to look at what they have without it being through a dominant/submission and sometimes s/m lens.

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another shoujo i absolutely love (and is way, way shorter): beast master [MAL / AL / MU]

Leo Aoi looks like a crazy animal with wild eyes, and he goes berserk whenever he feels threatened and sees blood. That doesn't stop animal-lover Yuiko Kubozuka from befriending him, however. In fact, Yuiko is the only person Leo will listen to when he has one of his violent fits…

leo is pretty terrifying and violent when he goes berserk, but he is also a soft, nice boy who pretty much adopts yuiko as his 'master' (in an informal, unsaid way). she is a very chill girl and i love the way she shows him affection, even while they are still friends. while it's something not unlike friendships in my country, it's still kind of rare for japanese characters. it makes him absolutely besotted with her and devoted.

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you've already found this one, but it bears repeating that narita-kun wo semetai! (i want to be aggressive towards narita!) [MAL / AL / MU] has plenty of domf/subm moments between the leads (and narita is very much a cool high school boy in appearance)

Amane Fukatsu, a 2nd year high school girl, is an otaku whose hobby is posting her BL manga creations on social media. One day, she stumbles upon Narita-kun, a popular guy from another class, being attacked by a cat (?). Witnessing this scene of gap-moe, Amane is struck by inspiration…?! A cool otaku girl takes the initiative to relentlessly pursue a popular guy! A new-age romantic comedy filled with laughter and heart-warming moments.

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in o! naui wangjanim (oh! my prince AKA oh! my pharaoh) [MAL / AL / MU] the domf/subm vibes are not completely visible in the beginning, but by the time the guy is head-over-heels, it's clear as day who's the dominant one in the relationship. (there are no good synopsis for this one so have two of them to piece together what this is about haha)

The prodigy who took the world by storm, resigned just after joining the school! Fluent in eight languages from a tender age and capable at everything, he passed the judicial examination while still attending high school, and was dubbed "the Genius of Geniuses." However, there was only one thing this genius did not possess—proper parenting. One day, he got hurdled into a gang fight with a group of rowdy students, and didn't manage to dodge a direct blow to the back of his head with a baseball bat and thus fainted. When he came to, he realized that he was, unexpectedly, in Egypt?! Ancient Egypt: to be able to reign in a world where women are nothing, she stole the identity of her brother, the prince. With such a lie, to reign or to love, it will be necessary to decide! When his tutor arrives in his life, the meeting is electric. He has a big advantage: he comes from the future and knows the whole history of the kingdom perfectly!

i'm also obsessed with the way she is a bit of a lo/li (not really, she's initially a teen) who looks like a sho/ta who looks like a lo/li. i love when girls look like very beautiful kind of feminine boys (and when boys look like beautiful girls of course haha but for girls it's a bit rarer).

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i know you probably have come across this one already, but i want to give a shout-out to sunjeongmalgo sunjong (act like you love me!) [ MAL / AL / MU]

25-year-old Ji-Eon is stressed, overworked, and penniless. When a mix-up at a temp job has her spending a day as famous actor Do-Yun Nam’s personal assistant, she takes her anger out on a doll… which turns out to have the magical ability to control him at her every whim. Now it’s her turn to be the boss.

i actually wavered a bit on whether to tag jieon as 'dom f' or not. i think i did in the end because she is still very much in charge of the relationship at all points and even if she mostly sweeps him off his feet without realizing, i think she also has plenty of assertive moments. also, i swear to god.. (SPOILER)i literally said on a comment that it's bloody coward that the author hasn't shown them using the doll (who makes him do whatever she says) for sex yet and then LITERALLY A FEW CHAPTERS LATER they actually do use the doll for sex!! (though we can't see the scene, it's a romcom manga). jieon canonically sexually dominates doyun so like!!!(END SPOILER). but yeah even with this 'is jieon a dom-type?' wobble, rest assured. if there ever was a submissive guy, this one is it lmao. and he's the bratty mad-about-it type!

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this one i actually haven't read yet: gwiyeoun yasunim! (my cute beast) [MAL / AL / MU]

As the saying goes - never judge a book by its cover. Da-Im is a lovely elementary school teacher, as well as a savage who can rip anyone apart with the fiercest comebacks. On-Gyum is a florist with a heart of gold, who often gets misunderstood because of his intimidating looks. But as incompatible as they seem, their shared love of cats starts pulling the unlikely pair closer together… Here comes an upbeat romantic comedy between a sassy bunny and a sweet beast!

i always see this one around when looking for dom f/sub m/role rev manga and i'm always on the brink of reading this but i always start something else lmaoo. i'll get to this soon!

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Tried looking, but no luck.

other than a shorter male character, both effeminate and sub/dom are terms that can have different interpretations, so i apologize if the recs are useless.

first thing that comes to mind is ikemen joshi to josou danshi [MAL / AL / MU]. as the premise lets you know, the male character starts cross-dressing, so he is feminine in that way (and definitely submissive), but i suppose he isn't effeminate in the "classic" way. the taller female lead is also a cross-dresser because she wants to (one of the few female cross-dressers in manga who actually enjoy it..). i can also guarantee she is dominant. i really enjoyed this manga.

another one, now with the more usual type of effeminate male character, is yeonwoo's innocence [MAL / AL / MU]. i'm not up to date with this one. i read a bunch of chapters a long time ago and didn't keep up with it (and it's still going. good lord.) i remember he is very shy and feminine and she is very princely, but their interactions were still kind of shallow instead of the actual throes of love, so i don't know exactly how their dynamic looks like when the real romance begins.

i've been following a "manga" (published in english but like. still seems like a manga) called so shine!! [mangadex] that meets all the requirements, except i'm not sure if the guy could be considered feminine enough for you haha i think he's pretty adorable.

kawaii hito [MAL / AL / MU] also fits. i have a lot of affection for this one 🫶

from what i've read of lady crystal is a man [MAL / AL / MU] (also paused this one), even though both characters are cross-dressing (for historical fantasy world reasons this time), i can tell the guy is definitely big-innocent-eyes / blushing-a-lot feminine and the girl seems to be naturally handsome and a charmer. problem is, i don't know if he actually stays shorter than her because of the whole "his development was stunted to keep his gender hidden" thing (i have one bone or two to pick w this manwha bc of how it portrays genderbender. but i digress). if i know a thing or two about korean manwha i would say luck is not on our favor. (btw, for this same reason i can't list let's hide my little brother as an example because manwha is addicted to undoing every single little deviation from the norm the characters could ever have).

aki sora [MAL / AL / MU] also fits what you ask... it's in/cest though. and borderline H.

miageru to kimi wa [MAL / AL / MU] kinda fits too... again, depends on how effeminate you want him to be. and their little romance stays very much kinda static, innocent schoolkids thing. not much of a breeding ground for dominance and submission, though maybe the roots of it are there a little bit.

i liked the characters in pump up! [MAL / AL / MU] but not so much how the romance story unfolds. still, it's a short read and they're cute.

i would also like to mention princess-kun to knight-san [MAL / AL / MU]. there are not many chapters yet, and i guess it's foolish to hope she might be dominant, but the story didn't disappoint me by making her straight up submissive... yet. but since he is a feminine shorter guy and she's a knight in shining armor kind of lady, maybe it's worth checking out. i do like them as characters in their own right so far.

the boy in a princely girlfriend's bad habits [mangadex / MU] is not exactly effeminate, but he is feminine not only in appearance, i would say. he could pass as a grumpy female lead if you ask me. he's cute, but a bit stubborn, with a chip on his shoulder.

elf ga joou-sama! [AL / MU] ... borderline H again

if you don't mind the boy being much younger (sho/ta), there's also boku no chi de yokereba [MAL / AL / MU] and novels, boy and a sailor uniform [MAL / AL / MU] (oneshot for the people who like forcefem)

oh and honorable mention to kawaisugiru danshi ga ouchi de matteimasu [MAL / AL / MU] (not a sho/ta manga). she probably isn't straight up Dominant but i sure as hell wish i had the rest of the scanlated manga for the chance to find out 😭

sorry i can't help you with the yaoi version of this, not my thing etc. but i'm pretty sure an effeminate smaller uke and a taller dominant seme is the classic of the classic of yaoi manga and you wouldn't have any trouble finding it after spending some time on the tags of MU. also there must be some BL manga blog around here to help...