#stylessemantics

He stole glances from his own homework as y/n filled in some practice sheets from her chemistry labs so that Harry could look them over and correct for her after. Both of them worked in silence, taking unnoticed turns to look at each other. Y/N wanted to talk about it, Harry not so much, and that was it… That was silence.

Neither had stopped thinking about the night before, both in different ways. While Harry worried and worried and worried about how he made things the worst possible and he was angry at himself for wanting more, y/n worried and worried and worried that she didn’t understand what was happening, she didn’t know why she wanted more, but alas, she did.

More of what? Nothing had happened, and from the looks of it, nothing would.

Harry read over y/n’s correct answers, she was grasping things quite fast, and crossed the few she’d gotten wrong, and while y/n waited for him to say anything, things felt the most awkward they ever had. Harry wasn’t joking or complimenting her on her good work, and she was avoiding looking him in the eye. “So…” she started, breaking the everlasting silence. Harry gulped visibly but didn’t make a move to look at her. “I… uh.” Harry cleared his throat and fumbled in his seat, faking interest in one of her answers. “Harry, about the other night…” she whispered and Harry went into panic mode. “These are good” he said, a little too loud which caused several people surrounding them to shush him. It was then Harry realised they weren’t alone. God, it felt like it was just him and y/n in that room for the longest time. He’d drowned out everything else in his mess of thoughts. “Sorry” he whispered back to no one, just apologising to fill the void. Once more he cleared his throat. “These are good. Y-you’re going great, uh… Is that a-all you had to do?” “Yes, uh… That was it” y/n didn’t know how to counter Harry’s suddenly short self. He seemed like he wanted to run, and y/n sighed giving up. She also wanted to run, especially if this was how things would be. Short and slightly rude and not at all like the friendly mood they’d settled in and one confusing night easily took away. “I should leave then” and without another word, or another glance at Harry’s defeated face, she gathered her belongings and waved him goodbye, leaving a guilt-filled Harry frozen in his spot.

He was making things worse and now it had nothing to do with the things he’d said in her room. He was pushing her away and being rude and he felt immediate guilt. He shouldn’t be treating her that way, after all it was all his fault. Harry sighed and slapped himself in his mind for his strange behaviour, sinking into his seat and throwing his glasses on the table in defeat, rubbing his eyes. He needed to apologise to her, and while he was at it, man up and finally talk about it.

Harry wasn’t good at avoiding Jonathan, specially when his mind wasn’t into it, and that’s why just barely after taking ten steps in the direction of his dorm building, he got pushed back by the tall guy who seemed like he was out for blood he didn’t collect on their last encounter.

Jonathan was saying some things. Whatever it was it turned to white noise to Harry.

He didn’t know what was wrong with him but he was angry. Angry and tired. He wasn’t in the mood for Jonathan and his nonsense, and all he wanted to do was go to his dorm and rest, catch some sleep he’d missed due to overthinking what his relationship with y/n would be after that thing happened, and he was fuming that he was fucking things up so bad. He didn’t have time for Jonathan spewing empty threats and delaying the punch he’d deliver to Harry’s face. Shut up Jonathan, he kept thinking, just fuck off, he said over and over again in his head “Fuck off Jonathan” he ended up murmuring, and immediately the urge to take it back or cover his mouth as if he couldn’t believe he’d said that, ran through his veins, but tiredness ran faster, and pushed it back. No guilt. “What did you just say to me, Marcel?” and Harry hesitated, but not because he wouldn’t say it again, but because he wanted to make sure he delivered it with enough punch that would hopefully end Jonathan’s stupid boasted ego. “I said… Fuck. Off.” and Harry pushed at Jonathan’s shoulders, succeeding at getting him off his chest and at a safe distance. Jonathan was shocked, mouth opened in surprise. “Oh, that’s it, Styles” and with that line he delivered the blow that broke Harry.

Harry was running. 

Unbelievable, he thought to himself. It was unbelievable how he could continue to fuck things up. First he says that to y/n’s face, and then he’s rude to her in the library and now this. This was the last straw, he was sure. Y/N wouldn’t want anything to do with him, but he had to let her know. She had to hear it from him and not from someone else. He had to tell her before someone else did and everything went to shit even more than it already had. And so Harry was running, at the fastest his feet could carry him to her room, and then he was banging and then he was apologising for things y/n couldn’t comprehend. 

“Harry?” she opened her door, surprised to see him there, so distressed. “I’m sorry, I am so sorry, I don’t know what got into me” his brow was bleeding a little bit and he slammed the door after he allowed himself in, taking both of y/n’s hands in his as he continued to say he was sorry for who knows what. The only thing y/n could imagine was that he was apologising for the night before, but she felt like she was the one that needed to say it, she felt like she was the one that broke some rule or boundary and made things awkward. “No, Harry, stop. I’m sorry” “No no” he cut her off “That’s not… this is not about yesterday I-God… I didn’t meant to” “Calm down Harry, I don’t understand” and he took a deep breath in, letting it out with words he didn’t think he’d say after all that had happened between him and y/n. “I punched Jonathan”

Despite Harry speaking incredibly fast, which y/n didn’t think she’d ever witness, she understood most of what he said, that he was angry and tired, and Jonathan was pushing and when he punched, Harry didn’t think twice but to punch back for once, and felt immediate regret. His fist was red and had some dried blood on it, so y/n knew just by looking at it that it was a hefty jab, a mean right hook. 

“Okay. But why are you sorry?” y/n asked, genuinely confused, as she grabbed a small towel and dabbed away the blood on Harry’s brow, placing his glasses on her desk. “Because…” he didn’t know where to start. He knew exactly why, but he didn’t know if y/n would understand. “Because I’m not- I don’t want to be Jonathan, okay?” y/n was confused. “Of course you’re n-” he shook his head. “No, I mean… I know how he got, you told me about his anger and... and you guys broke up because of it, and I… I-I just don’t want to be another guy that solves shit by punching, to you. I don’t want to be another Jonathan, I’m not, I swear, I… I lost it and I regretted it immediately! I j-just… I’m not like that, I’m not some a-angry guy that needs to… to let it out in some way, a-and you don’t need or deserve another guy like that, ever, and, and, Christ y/n, I’m not that, I-I’m sorry I-” Harry stopped in his tracks when y/n grabbed his cheeks to keep him from pacing left and right, and focused him on her. “Harry” she started, barely above a whisper, causing goosebumps to raise on his arms. “You’re not Jonathan, and you won’t be. Not to me. Punching someone doesn’t even put you close, Harry. There’s… It’s not just punches, okay? That’s not why we broke up and you know it. You’re nothing like Jonathan and anyone can see that from miles away, not just me, and I know that you will never be and… I-The fact that you care about me this way, I... Harry, you are…”

Whatever Harry was, the tingles running down his spine and the butterflies on his tummy didn’t let her finish it, the overpowering rush taking over and making him lean forward and crash his lips against hers.

The kiss was short, a mere split-second weakness and desire-driven impulse, but Harry can feel his heart aching the moment he stops having her lips on his, as if that short kiss was all it took for his whole soul to say ‘this is it’, and now he’s been deprived of it.

With just partly open lids and lips, y/n and Harry stare at each other for a bit, shocked and confused, searching for more, and before he can mumble another one of his ‘I’m sorry’s that y/n is tired of hearing, she’s pressing him back to her mouth, this time for just a little longer. They can both feel the kiss is too short as they pull away, because both their chests ache for more, between the pent up tension from the night before and the bubble they have created, enclosing them in safety, desire and want, they both sigh before diving back in for more and more and more.

There’s a fire in Harry’s veins that intensifies with the memories of having her in his dreams, the build up from wanting her so bad to finally having her making him feel like he’s about to explode in a puddle of feelings for her, and that fire can’t be stopped, specially when he bites down ever so softly on her bottom lip, eliciting a small moan from her, that disappears into his own mouth, as it drives his most carnal impulses and he picks y/n up by her thighs, wrapping them around his frame and walking them towards the wall where the more dominant, sexy side of Harry, the one y/n never thought existed, comes forth and short of slams her against the wall as he sinks his hips in, getting more and more of her.

And it’s not like y/n’s not enjoying it, she likes getting somewhat of a repeat of the other night, this time getting just a tad more, but there’s some pain jolting through her body as she crashes freshly-tattooed-side to the wall first, hissing in the middle of the kiss. “Ow” she yelps, and Harry’s quick to stand back, one hand under one of her thighs, the other to the wall, separating their bodies from the hard surface. There’s panic in his face. Was he too rough? Was that too much? Oh, no, whatever will he do, he’s close to spiralling out of control in bad thoughts. “Fuck, I’m sorry, did I hurt you? I hurt you, right? I-” “No, no. I just. Ouch” y/n tries to reach back and itch the skin “My tattoo just…” “Oh god, I’m so sorry” and Harry’s pulling further back, letting her body slide down his, back on her own two feet, not before she can feel the bump in the middle of his jeans as she drops back down, causing her cheeks to redden almost immediately. “Are you okay?” “Yeah, just… Stung a bit” “God, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me, I was too rough, I’m sorry” “Harry, it’s okay, I li-” y/n snaps her mouth shut. Was she about to admit that she liked whatever it was that took over Harry? That she liked being in that position? Or maybe she just enjoyed a really good kiss. She enjoyed all of it, but she couldn’t bring her rosy-cheeked self to say it out loud. With a silence that made everything more evident, Harry’s face flushed red as well, both of them swaying on the balls of their feet as they remained at half-arms-length, yet scared to touch once again. “Harry” she whispers, the silence too much and too long to bare next to the incredibly painful charge of lust in the air. “Y/n” he says back, and as they look at each other they can finally read it in the other’s eyes.

I want you. I want more of you.

The door to y/n’s room opens and her and Harry are quick to jump a few inches of the ground and away from each other, frightened by the sudden intrusion and interruption, but on the other side stands Jenna, y/n’s roommate, the one that’s never around, the one that Harry often forgets exists and can’t have a worse timing to make her existence remembered. “Oh… Hi!” “Jenna! Hi!” y/n smiles nervously, holding back an awkward laughter. Jenna practically lives at her boyfriend’s place, only coming around when she needs something, like free washing machines or some of y/n’s clothes, or when her and her boyfriend argue. “Hello” Harry adds just above a shy whisper, clearing his throat, scared that people can smell the hunger off of him. His hands place themselves strategically over his aching center as he scoots towards the door. “I was just uh, leaving… yeah, bye” He turns to say to y/n and the urge to press a kiss to her mouth as a gentle goodbye is too big to hold in, yet somehow he manages, pressing his lips to her cheek instead, lingering just a nano-second too long and then rushing off before y/n can say anything.

And what would she say? Ask him to stay? Offer to go with him? She’s glued to her spot, replaying what just happened between them in her head over and over and just getting redder and redder. Jenna looks between y/n and the door, back and forth a couple times. “Did I… Did I interrupt something?” Jenna says with arched eyebrows, snapping y/n back to reality. “What? No, no, ugh I just...” y/n walks over to her bed, letting herself drop on it face first, wanting to scream into her pillow. She takes a deep breath instead “Weren’t you at Nick’s today, Jenna? And yesterday too?” “He’s being a dick, but that’s not the point here. Oh my god! I did interrupt something!” y/n remains silent for a moment, it’s impossible to deny anyways. She sighs. “Yes, now shut up” “No way! I’m so sorry! Tell me all about it” and y/n laughs because this is just like Jenna. “I would, but you cockblocked me so hard I might keep this information in as revenge” she says, throwing a pillow at her friend and keeping her mouth in a tight lip smile throughout Jenna’s whole tantrum that she wants to know so bad, and her million apologies that she interrupted something so big.

All y/n can do is sigh and wish for the next time she sees Harry to be… A little less confusing but just as enjoyable. Maybe more.

Harry heard her before he saw her. Earlier that morning, the following day, there she was, calling his name through the hallways in campus, greeting him with a big smile and pressing a short kiss to his cheek that caused them both to blush. Harry had a hard time staying still the night before and had giddily told Nick all about the kiss he’d shared with y/n and how his feet felt like they hadn’t touched the ground since.

Y/N and Harry stood there like two fools, smiling and blushing and looking. Neither knew what to say until y/n snapped out of her trance and asked him to help her cram some studying before her chemistry lab quiz she’d have later that week that she’d forgotten all about. And in a hurry Harry proposed they made themselves at home at the library, where they currently where sat in silence, sneaking giggly glances at each other, but sat far enough away that Harry’s urges wouldn’t spiral out of control and make him kiss her again. He enjoyed the kiss, a lot, but didn’t want to push anything else on her, the topic of whatever happened a few night’s back still fresh in the back of his mind, and despite feeling like y/n enjoyed the kiss as well, he wanted to keep his distance just in case he was misreading the situation.

The silence was only interrupted with small, almost inaudible giggles that escaped both of them whenever they caught the other glancing, and little by little, between “is this okay?”s and “can you remind me of that law again?”s, Harry and y/n were scooted closer down the table, to the point where if Harry pressed himself closer to the wooden bench, he’d touch his knee to hers.

He did it once out of nervousness, and then a second time, testing the waters and just for the thrill of it, and then by the third time it was y/n who moved and made sure their knees touched for the remainder of their short improv study session.

“I have a sheet with how Mr. Greenwald likes to do the chem tests, I’ll email it to you tonight” Harry said as he walked down a library aisle, returning the books he’d borrowed, with y/n quick in tow, her own materials in her arms. “Yeah, thank you” Harry just nodded at her whispery reply. And it was then, hidden from the rest of the silent students and at this close proximity that they found themselves back in the mindset of the day before. Harry’s eyes dancing between y/n’s shiny ones, faces inching closer in hopes for a repeat for that they didn’t feel they had finished. Harry swallowed hard. “I-I should g-go to class” y/n said, nose bumping against his. Through the thickness of his glasses he found different spots and marks around her cheeks that only made his heart adore her more. She was too pretty for words. Harry nodded, although he didn’t fully know what she was talking about. “I should get to work” he whispered back, voice barely audible, except y/n was so close she didn’t need any more volume from him.

With clumsy hands, Harry reached to his side, not paying attention to anything other than y/n and her pretty face and how fast his heart was racing, trying to place a book back into the small nook it left when he took it down, missing terribly and having it scatter down to his feet, with a thud weakened by the carpeted ground. Y/n and Harry pull apart in surprise, not fully believing what had just happened, the trance they had sunk into for a brief moment. Harry cleared his throat silently, toying with his frames on his face before bending over to pick up the book and straighten the creased page where it fell on. They whispered short goodbyes and went their separate ways, both with troubled breathings and warm cheeks, thinking of how much more different things would have ended had Harry’s hands not been so clumsy. Harry thought his glasses would fog over with how steamy he felt his face get, but he marched on towards his dorm, trying to calm his beating heart and get ready for work before he was late.

It was the end of the week when they saw each other again. The bell to the bakery door dinged, and Harry didn’t look up from placing baked goods on the display, until a familiar voice called for him over the decorated counter. “Hi!” y/n chirped happily. “Oh, hey, what are you doing here?” Harry asks genuinely confused, pushing his glasses up his nose from his hunched position. He doesn’t remember y/n coming in this bakery much, except she’d been there more times since he got back to working there and after he’d started tutoring her. Harry wanted to think it was a coincidence, but wouldn’t lie that the idea of it not being one, was making his stomach fill with butterflies. Was she coming more because of him? No way. He couldn’t believe it. “Jenna wanted some cookies before we went to the mall” y/n leaned over the counter, swaying left and right adorably, her smile wider than ever. “I have great news” “What’s that?” he couldn’t help but smile back. “I got an A on that test” she winked at him. “What?! Congrats! That’s so great!” y/n brushed her shoulder, as if saying ‘I’m the best, I know’ before bursting into a full on giggle. “I just happen to have the best tutor” Harry immediately smiled and blushed at her words. “Shut up.” he waved a hand, dismissing her, but she continued to say how true was it that he’s just that good of a teacher. Harry interjected “We have to celebrate!” “Totally!” And before anything else could be said, Harry’s boss called him from the kitchen, interrupting his little break and happy interaction with y/n, and she smiled at him as he pointed behind him, rolling his eyes, understanding he had to get back to work. “Stop by my dorm later, yeah? I’ll bring cupcakes” y/n fake gasped in excitement at his words that were laced with a warm smile. “Had me at cupcakes” and with that she leaned even further in and pressed her lips to Harry’s dimpled cheek, whispering “see you” before skipping over to her friend by the door, and out of the bakery, hair bouncing left and right as she swayed away, leaving Harry the closest to a puddle of adoration he has ever been. Any more and he’d be melted just as much as the rich chocolate frosting on the goods he was arranging on the display.

By the time he got off work and all the way back to campus, y/n was leaning on his door when he walked down the hall. “Hey! Been waiting long?” “Nope, just got here really” she smiled at him so big, his cheeks were already feeling extra red. “Okay” he whispered shyly, reaching over and unlocking his door, letting her walk in first, then locking it again behind him. The small pink box from the bakery was placed on his desk and y/n clapped excitedly, like a little child that knew they were having their favourite for dinner.

Y/N recounted how easy she’d breezed through the exam as they lounged around in his room, sprawled across bean bags with the box of cupcakes between them. “Damn. You won’t even need me tutoring you at this pace” Harry praised her, but her face pulled into a frown, making him grow confused. “Aw man, I like you tutoring me. I like studying with you” she said truthfully, reaching out and poking his shoulder. They were back to their comfortable playful banter, with all the memories of kissing fresh in their minds, to the point y/n thought they were flirting but she was perfectly fine with it. She wanted to. She wanted to be cute and play coy and possibly get cheeky and kiss him some more, but the way Harry’s always been more shy and nervous – except when he was slamming her against a wall, that was something else – she sensed that she would have to take it a tad slower. “I like studying with you too” he admitted, still shocked that she’d said it first. He loved studying with her. Being with her in general was his favourite way to spend the time. “Bummer there’s nothing I can tutor you in when this semester’s over, you know-it-all” y/n joked, taking a bite of a cupcake. “Hey, not my fault.” he laughed “but, I don’t know… we could... just study together, despite the class… I mean, if you’re okay with that” “Of course! We can compare schedules and see when we could just… study… together, maybe on the weekends?” y/n blushed. “Yeah. Might have Intro to Philosophy on saturdays though” “I have to take that too! Let’s sign up for the same block!” y/n chimed in with excitement, reaching over to high five Harry as his face broke out into a huge smile, the kind that y/n loved seeing on his features. The kind of smile that made her happy as well, the kind that settled her nerves before an exam.

The kind that made her want to kiss him.

That feeling hadn’t left her alone for the past couple of days. It was like it chased her and she found herself wanting to be caught, wondering if maybe she should push again. She stared at the back of him as he stood by his desk, cleaning up after himself and gathering things to throw away alongside the empty box of cupcakes. Her eyes ran up and down his frame. He was something else, something she hadn’t figured out yet, but was pleased to know she was at least on her way to. He was giving her all these emotions she wasn’t sure of at first, but now she was aching for more. She couldn’t remember ever feeling like this when she and Jonathan, or any other boyfriend she’d had, started dating. That feeling like you’re on fire but you’re okay with it.

That, she would call lust.

But what would she call the butterflies and the tingles, the childlike giddiness and the blushing cheeks?

It would have to remain unnamed for now, at least while lust bubbled over faster, driving her towards Harry as she tapped his shoulder making him turn towards her. Harry was doing his own batch of silent thinking and wondering, a hand pinching the bridge of his nose as the other set his glasses down on his desk before focusing on her with a soft smile. He’d gone from not being able to say a word to y/n, to kissing her. And if his eyes and his gut didn’t deceive him, he’d spotted something that resembled his own want for her, in her eyes as they looked back at him, and he found it again now, when he turned around and there she was, her chest almost flush against his, cheeks red and heavy breathing. There was something there that acted like some sort of magnet, bringing his own reciprocating feelings to the surface of it all.

No words were shared between the two, only longing looks and a mute conversation that resonated deep within them. Before Harry’s anxious brain could kick in with something stupid disguised as logic – like stopping the situation in fear of not being enough – y/n pushed forward and pressed her lips to his.

Harry missed it. Kissing her again made him realise that he had somehow missed the feeling. He didn’t know how it was possible, for he had only kissed her briefly once before, but somehow he missed it. He surely missed the rush that it sent through his veins, and before he knew it, just like the first time they kissed, he started taking control, pressing his body to hers, wanting more and more – mainly because he didn’t know if he’d ever get more of it, of her, and he wanted to make it last – and moving both their bodies until she’s flush between his chest and the wall, the position triggering the memory of last time, when she’d squealed in pain from her tattoo. Harry pulled away, out of breath and disoriented. She was too much for him to handle, too much for his brain and body and heart to be in any sort of sync anymore. “Wait, wait” he said between puffs of air. Y/N’s chest moved up and down fastly, her own lungs out of air as well. “I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you, I don’t mean to… I just” He didn’t know where to start, how to tell her that he wanted her to want it too, that he wanted to treat her right, and that this wasn’t only lust for him. This was so much more, so much that she didn’t know, and he was afraid she’d run if she knew, but instead, as he searched her eyes for any sign of discomfort – and deep down in his brain for excuses to cut it all short – what he found was the same desire sparkling back at him. “Harry…–” she interrupted his babbling in a shy whisper – “I’m okay. It doesn’t hurt” her hand brought his face to look at her, deep into her irises, hoping she was saying everything she didn’t know how to phrase with just a look. Their breaths evened out, the only noise in the room. “Nothing hurts” she finished, engulfing them in silence as Harry let the words sink in, allowing the meaning behind it to go through his thick skull. For a nerdy, studious man like himself, y/n was the one topic he didn’t get exactly right, until this point. He was sure this was the first time he was truly in sync with her. As if he’d received an electric shock, his body reacted, snapping out of some sort of trance, and landing his lips to hers again.

This was what she meant, what she was saying.

Harry had never had a girl, or anyone really, in his room like this. It never felt like this before, like the air was too hot, but not hot enough. The dorm had never felt so big and spacious that he needed the warmth of another body melted into his, but that’s what he wanted with y/n, and with a swift tug he knew she felt it too.

They stumbled around the room, on their way to his bed while groping and pinching and discovering with their hands as their mouths had a dance of their own. It was frantic and a little messy, but it meant everything to Harry. He feared one of her pinches would be hard enough to wake him up, and he’d sit up in bed and realise this was another one of those dreams. He’d had enough of those; the real deal was here and wanted him too, the realization of it making him woozy.

Y/N was laid under him, shirt long forgotten and hair a mess but the most beautiful thing he’d ever laid eyes on anyways. She worked her fingers around the hem of his jeans, itching to pull them off, starving for more skin on skin contact. His tattooed chest already doing wonders to her emotions as it pressed to her naked one. Garments were softly yet rapidly removed, the speed at which things progressed not taking away from the meaning behind it. How fast they were going didn’t make this just another encounter, but instead spoke loudly of how much they both craved the other, so much to the point that another second without it would drive them mad.

It was heat, a heat they had been deprived of and hadn’t realised until now.

Open mouth to open mouth, they breathed in and out in short huffs, bodies so close they didn’t need to say anything to have a chat. The sliver of doubt that crossed Harry’s eyes was so minimal y/n almost didn’t catch it, but she did because suddenly it was like they were born to be this connected. Y/N’s hands pulled Harry back to her lips by the neck, reassuring him in a way, as his snaked under her body, lifting her off the bed enough to remove the last piece of clothing that stood between complete intimacy. It was then that Harry really knew what was about to happen as he reached over his nightstand for protection. This wasn’t just his imagination, this was something else. This was it. “Y/N” he whispered to her neck, lifting himself up so he could look at her, sprawled out on his mattress, glowing and nude. The sight alone made him ache. She was… He didn’t have a word. No dictionary he could read had the right word to describe her. How she bit her lip, and her eyes had a vibrancy in them he never imagined possible, how she sensually mouthed the barely audible words that meant the demise of his self control. “I want you, Harry”

That was it.

Trembling hands prepared him for it as he took deep breaths. With long groans and a slow rhythm he’d thrusted into her, her warmth welcoming him, immediately sending his hormones in a frenzy. Her mewls were his new favourite sound and the way his face scrunched up in pleasure with every dip of his hips, was her new favourite picture.

Lust.

Lust, but so tender and caring. Maybe she could call those other feelings that. She didn’t want to waste time on that. All of her focus was on Harry, clouding her brain like a storm season, hitting her in spots undiscovered, now brought to life by him. “H-Harry I’m- God” Y/N slowly wrapped her legs around his figure, dragging them along his thighs until they were up by his hips, ankles crossing behind his back, hands digging into his shoulder blades. He didn’t just feel good with his slow paced thrusts, he felt good to the touch. He felt good to feel.

“F-fuck me” he moaned to her ear, eyes closed shut in bliss, dropping kisses and bites down towards her neck and collarbones. Harry wanted every little bit of her, something to take from this and keep forever. He feared he would screw it all up and he’d be sunken down back to just dreaming of her, so he wanted to collect everything he could. Her taste, her smell, how she felt around him. It was all a mission to keep her close, just like this, for whenever he’d need her. He wanted to close his eyes and be able to see this replaying every time. Looking up to her was quite the sight. Lids at half mast, open mouth and little moans of “Yes, Harry, fuck” that would – if he was lucky – haunt him forever.

He wanted to smack himself for being this stupid, for allowing this to happen knowing that he probably wouldn’t get it again. Make it unforgettable Harry, he kept thinking, for both of you. But it was hard.

It was hard to want her for this long, so much that in just a matter of minutes he was on the edge of his finish.

He looked down at her, the words escaping him before he could process any syllable that stumbled between gasps for air. “Gorgeous, fuck– You’re so gorgeous, you’re beautiful, y/n, you’re- Christ” the last of it came in a shivering huff, as the tickling of his orgasm crept up his spine. “M-more, Harry, I-I want you” her back arched off the bed, her own finish threatening to take over, ready to wash over her like an ocean. “I’m close- I’m- Harry, yes” “Me too. Y/N… You-you…” he couldn’t finish that sentence, feeling her tighten around him, his grip on her waist tightening, as her nails left marks on his back, their chests pressed together to where no one could tell where Harry ended and y/n started. His arm felt like giving out as his resolve weakened and Harry’s own release came forth. Almost like a chain reaction, y/n let out a long moan as she climaxed, and within the next few seconds Harry followed right back, spilling into the condom in hot spurts, an orgasm he’d only dreamed of but finally had.

There wasn’t any collapsing onto her body, for he was already so close to her during the whole act that it only felt like being naked once more when he shuffled to her side, only half his body on top of hers. Neither had a thing to say as their respirations calmed, and once more only their eyes talked as they gazed into each others’.

Harry didn’t know what to say, where to even start. It would be too much to admit he’d dreamt of this, right? Yeah, that was too forward. If he ever wanted a chance with her, that was a sliver of information he should keep a secret. Y/N didn’t know what to say either, deciding it was better to not say anything at all and just reach over and delicately run her fingers through his hair.

He looked so pretty like that, without his thick glasses, spent and fucked out, what a sight, and y/n realised Harry had started to look pretty every time she saw him.

It took them just a few minutes of relaxing and assimilating what had just happened, before y/n was taken over by giggles. Awkward, post-sex giggles that made Harry’s dimpled smile surface in a flash. She was the most beautiful thing in the world, how and when did he get this lucky?

Y/N bit her lip once more as the laughter subsided, and it was Harry’s turn to caress her cheek with delicate hands. His green eyes said it all, and y/n felt as if he was telling her all the compliments in the world with just a look, causing her to blush along with him. “Har-” she began, finally one of them starting the conversation that so badly needed to happen but neither knew how to begin, and was interrupted by an abrupt knock on Harry’s door. “Room check, Styles!” They short of jumped off the bed at the sudden intrusion, Harry immediately scurrying to grab his clothes and the blanket by their feet for y/n to cover her naked body. Fuck fuck fuck, was all he kept murmuring under his breath as he ran to dress himself. He knew that on the other side of his door was Liam, the more chill monitor, the one Harry was sorta friends with. He signalled to y/n to hide while he attended the door, and, wrapped in just a sheet she got up, positioning herself behind a wall and trying to slowly dress herself in hidden while holding in her laughter. For some reason this was hilarious to her. Just how many times will her moments with Harry get interrupted.

Harry opened the door just a bit, enough for Liam to peek in and go away, if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry looked so incredibly guilty, it would be unfair for Liam to not mess with him a bit. “Hi!” Harry said, a bit to over the top. “Room check, everything okay?” “All good” he rushed “It’s past hours, any girls here?” Liam tried to walk in the room but Harry stood his ground, keeping him from storming in. “Nope” Liam squinted at Harry’s nervous stance and fast, chirpy replies. “Hmmm, how about you let me in then, Harry?” “Uhh… i-it’s a mess in here, y-you wouldn’t-” “We’re all men! –” Liam countered – “Of course it’s a mess, nothing I haven’t seen before… Right?” He arched an eyebrow in challenge. Harry was hiding something, it was clear, and Liam wanted to ruffle him up a bit, so he pushed again, this time opening the door a little more and a little more, despite Harry trying his best to stop him. “Liam… L-Liam please, stop. Liam, I swear” he said in a rushed, hushed voice, practically begging him to go away. “Aw c’mon Harry” Liam teased “I need to do my-” With a quick gaze around the room Liam saw it. 

The door had opened just enough for Liam to see a quick reflection in the mirror at the other end of the room. The silhouette of a girl, he couldn’t tell who from his spot – and neither did he see anything inappropriate, thank God – wrapped up in a sheet and cowering behind the wall trying to get dressed quickly. Liam’s jaw dropped open slowly, eyebrows rising in shock. “Oh” he murmured, causing Harry to turn around and catch what Liam had seen, nerves and slight anger immediately rushing through his veins. With a swift push, he got Liam back to the hall, keeping him away. “Liam-” “Oh, Harry...” he teased some more, winking and raising his eyebrows in a suggestive manner, causing the curly haired one to grow as red as an actual tomato. He’s sure he’s never seen anyone turn this red in his life. Liam raised his hand for a high five but Harry punched him in the shoulder, hard enough for him to back down but not enough to really really hurt him. “Shut up” Harry whispered. “I didn’t say anything!” “Go, Liam!” he shooed his friend away with a groan. “Fine, fine” Liam raised his arms in the air in a sign of defeat. “But she’s got 10 minutes to leave” he whispered to Harry before winking at him one last time and walking away.

Harry rested his back on the door as he closed it, letting out a long exhausted sigh. Unbelievable. He rubbed his eyes in annoyance. This was the last thing he needed, but his anger dissipated quickly when y/n walked up to him, slipping her arms through the sleeves of her hoodie, getting officially dressed back again. Now Harry was back to being shy and red beyond belief. “God that was so…” “Embarrassing? Yeah” y/n said between giggles, making light of the situation for both their sakes and inducing a giggle to come out of him as well. She took a hold of one of Harry’s hands and squeezed it. “I should go, then?” All Harry could do was nod as he bit his lip. God, he wanted her to stay, every day if she wanted, but he knew she couldn’t. Maybe someday, just how tonight had been a dream come true, maybe her staying was a wish that life would grant Harry down the road, but for now she needed to leave. Harry cleared his throat in awkwardness. “Y/N, uh… I just… I” she shushed him “Yeah I know… that was…” “Yeah” again, they giggled. This time it was Harry who, without even expecting it himself, initiated the contact, bringing her close to his body by wrapping his arms around her waist, placing her close enough that his heart beat sped up once again. “It was good” she whispered, and it almost made him drop dead when his heart skipped a beat. It was good? She had enjoyed it? “Yeah?” it was her time to just nod coyly, standing on the tips of her toes to press a chaste kiss to his lips. If it were up to Harry he’d freeze time right there, in that post-climax, comfortable, giggly heaven they had wrapped themselves in.

When she stepped back, Harry was still savouring the whole night. He didn’t want any detail to escape his brain later on, or ever. Y/N was preparing to leave and the moment she’d stepped out of his room Harry felt himself spiraling. God, he didn’t even tell her how he felt, he didn’t know if she thought he just wanted something physical, he knew nothing. All of that had happened and he still felt like he knew nothing.

He figured this was as good of a time as any to make sure she knew that he really really wanted her, and not just in the way he’d just had her. And so, with a shaky breath and equally shaky hands, he gathered the confidence he didn’t know he could even muster until a few weeks back, and turned around, deciding to go after her.

Opening his door he comes face to face with her and for a second they just stare. She had also turned around, not ready to leave just yet. Not ready to finish a conversation she wasn’t sure had actually started. “Harry, I-” “Go on a date with me” He said, cutting her own sentence short “Please.” His hands were in tight fists in anticipation as another thought ran through his brain. 

What if she wanted something physical, he didn’t even think of that, he could be royally fucking everything up by being so forward like that. 

He looked up at her, peeking at her expression, and all of his body was relieved to find a smile on her features. That was a good sign? Right? “Okay” she whispered, so silently Harry didn’t think he was meant to hear it but he did. He did and there was nothing stopping the butterflies and the tingles and everything nice that took over him at that moment. “Yes?” he asked, just to make absolutely sure. “Yes” and this time she nodded as well, giving him a visual that, indeed, she had agreed.

Neither said much after that. Now there was truly nothing left to be said. With little whispery “see you tomorrow”s, they parted ways for good, y/n a mess of giggles and blushing cheeks as she walked back to her dorm not far away, and Harry an explosion of butterflies and his face all hot as he let his body fall back on his bed and he replayed everything, from the beginning, from the moment the cute girl had sat next to him in chemistry 101 and had laughed at his jokes. The same girl that flooded his dreams and had been driving him crazy since then and that he now had a date with.

He wanted to see her again already, he even wanted to dream of her again and again and again, but with all that excitement he wasn’t sure he could sleep a wink.

Thanks for reading! FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED PLEASE!!! I want to know what you think of this. I MIGHT HAVE AN IDEA FOR A LITTLE EXTRA BLURB REGARDING SOMETHING MORE SMUTTY SO MAYBE THAT WILL COME SOMEDAY. 

Anyways, do let me know what you thought etc etc! please! I Beg! And you’re always welcome to come chat about marcel in different scenarios, anything really. 

Smooches Iv. XO.