#sty volume 12

Volume 3:

Haruka remembered how she had buried her head in Yakumo's chest and cried earlier, and she went red all the way to her ears. Though it had been embarrassing, at the same time, she had felt an enveloping warmth. Did Yakumo think nothing of it at all?

Volume 12:

Yakumo waited for Haruka to return, only to see her walking towards him with tears in her eyes. And when she saw Yakumo, she indeed cried. She had immersed herself in the emotions of the victim and the victim's family. She buried her face in Yakumo's chest, her shoulders trembling as she cried. Seeing Haruka like this, Yakumo could feel that this was not some cheap sympathy. She felt the same pain and was genuinely distressed and saddened. This empathy was somewhat dangerous, but for Yakumo, it was also a form of salvation. If at that moment, he had held the crying Haruka tightly in his arms, what would have changed?

In volume 3, we saw Haruka cry into Yakumo's chest, flustered and unsure if he even cared. She remembered how she had buried her head in his chest—but what she didn't notice was that he was the one who gently pulled her in. He didn't hold her tightly. He just let her stay there, trembling. And she left that moment feeling both comforted and confused, wondering if it had meant anything to him at all.

Then, nine volumes later, in volume 12, we finally get Yakumo's side of it.

He remembers that exact moment while thinking he might have lost her forever. And in his memory, it's clear—he saw everything. Her tears, her empathy, the pain she carried for others. He knew it was dangerous, how deeply she felt—but to him, it was also salvation. She wasn't just being kind—she was feeling it all, and that moved him in a way he couldn't ignore.

And then comes that single, devastating line:

"If at that moment, he had held the crying Haruka tightly in his arms, what would have changed?"

Because he wanted to. He wanted to hold her. He had feelings for her—undeniably, overwhelmingly—but he was scared: of his own emotions, of what it might mean, of crossing a line he thought he had no right to. So he didn't just hold back physically—he held back his heart. Just like he did when she confessed in volume 10, and he got shy and couldn't bring himself to respond in the epilogue of the volume.

That's why this scene is so important. Because for the past two years, Haruka thought maybe it hadn't meant anything. But in truth, Yakumo was fighting feelings he'd had for a long time. Feelings he didn't know how to express. Feelings he didn't think he deserved. And this was one of the moments where he almost let them show.

I'm so grateful to Kaminaga-sensei for letting us see this moment through both their eyes. For showing us the quiet ache of two people who care so deeply, yet are always just a little too afraid to say it out loud. Because Yakumo's silence isn't indifference—it's love held in check. It's longing he was too afraid to act on.

By the time volume 12 comes around, a lot of Japanese fans felt like Yakumo suddenly comes in with these ridiculously intense, massive emotions—but it's not that they came out of nowhere. He was already affectionate, and already emotionally tied to Haruka from the very beginning.

But this time, the walls are down. It's no longer just restraint and quiet care—it's regret for all the time wasted, for keeping their relationship ambiguous, for not being honest about his feelings from the start. That's why he spent the whole time reminiscing about all the "what ifs."

HELP I CAN'T BELIEVE KAMINAGA-SENSEI WROTE THIS 😭

Just as Suou and Kokone were about to start walking toward the building where Ai’s apartment was, Yakumo suddenly said, “Go on ahead without me.” He stepped away from them and held his phone to his ear. It seemed he had received a call. But rather than actually going ahead, Suou thought it best to wait until Yakumo finished his conversation. “Maybe it’s his girlfriend,” Kokone teased, sitting down on the nearby swing. “It’s probably Inspector Ishii from the Setamachi Police Station,” Suou guessed. Yakumo had tried calling Ishii before they arrived but hadn’t gotten through. This was likely Ishii returning the call. “If it were just work, he could talk while walking. But telling us to go ahead? That screams ‘girlfriend call,’” Kokone insisted, rocking back and forth on the swing. The chains creaked as they rubbed against the metal. For some reason, that sound felt strangely nostalgic to Suou. “You think so? Yakumo-san doesn’t seem like the type to entertain calls from a girlfriend.” Yakumo rarely showed his emotions and carried a certain air of detachment. Suou couldn’t quite picture someone like that being overly affectionate in a relationship. “You don’t get it. Guys like him? They’re total softies in front of their girlfriends.” “I don’t know. When I saw him with her before, he didn’t act like that…” “Well, of course, they hide it in public! But behind closed doors? I bet he’s crazy possessive. Gets mad if she takes too long to reply to a text.” “Nah, I don’t see it…” Suou couldn’t imagine Yakumo losing his temper over something like that. If anything, he seemed like the type to maintain a dry, almost indifferent relationship. When he said this, Kokone scoffed, jumping off the swing. “You really don’t get it. People like him? They probably use baby talk with their girlfriends.” “You mean like, ‘goo-goo, gaa-gaa’?” “Exactly! ‘I’m tired today, so I want cuddles, please~’” “No way.” A sharp voice cut through their exchange—Yakumo’s, laced with irritation. He had returned without them noticing, making Suou’s stomach drop in surprise. Kokone, however, remained completely unfazed. “Honestly, that sounds like something you'd say.” “I would never use baby talk.” “Cat talk, then?” “…What?” “You know, like ‘nyaa, nyaa~’?” “What do you think I am? I’d never say something like that.” “Really? I should ask your girlfriend myself. Let’s meet her.” “Absolutely not.” “Boooring.”

Yakumo getting teased by someone younger than him is the funniest thing ever. Kokone’s constantly on his case, bro can’t catch a break 😂

But she’s kinda right though.

I don’t see Yakumo as the toxic possessive type, and I definitely don’t see him using baby talk, but he’s absolutely clingy and jealous.

Didn’t this man literally just tell his girlfriend to wait inside a shop if he was ever late again because he got jealous after seeing her get hit on?

Using the awkward, deadpan “because it’s cold” excuse.

In JULY.

He pulled her arm, gave the guy that terrifying look, and the next time they met, she found him waiting for her, apparently he just couldn't handle seeing that again 😭

Same guy who now only uses her name when they’re alone, by the way.

And don’t even get me started on that short story from last year where he fell asleep in the lab, dreaming about her and sleep-talking her name.

MIKOSHIBA RECORDED IT 💀

Called him “lovestruck” and said he’d use it as a “bargaining chip.”

Loses an argument and goes “fine, here's your reward" and hugs her.

This is also the same man who literally tried to die in the final volume just to follow her into the afterlife.

AND THAT'S NOT EVEN THE FULL LIST.

一You were the only one who said this eye was beautiful.

The fact that he admitted that this was the moment he fell in love with her (although he was unaware of it back then) and that she became "his special person" ever since 🥹🥹.