When I see spelt out sneezes, spelt out hitches, or sneezes described in A LITTLE too much detail in a " vanilla " fic..
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When I see spelt out sneezes, spelt out hitches, or sneezes described in A LITTLE too much detail in a " vanilla " fic..

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Thinking about a sickie (A) being intentionally gross to 'piss off' their rival, who they do not know has the kink (B)... I'm obsessed with Enemies AND lovers; I apologize. A blowing their nose right in front of B, seeing their jaw lock, thinking—Take that, you stuck-up prick. And B thinking, OH GODS, I'M HORNY RIGHT NOW. B has a very pristine and upper-class style to them; you'd assume they're a germophobe... They are the very opposite of that.
"EiiShoo! Eisccho! ehH- 'SHOO!" "Bless you. Bless you, hun. Good lord, [A], bless you." "Snnrf, snrf, snrf... Thids co'd is fugkig killig mbe.." "Shh- sh- sh- sh, I know, dear. Go back to sleep." "I deed to ge'd sobe worgk dode." "Oh please, you can barely open your eyes. Come back to bed." "... OkaHh.. OkayhHy!- EISSHOOW!" "Bless you.. Poor thing." "Mmgh.."
Thinking about a stoic, intimidating person having harsh, growl-esque sneezes in public…
“GRRSSSHT!”
“H’RRRSHT!”
“HRRRGSHoo!”
But it turns out, those sneezes are just to keep the appearance of authority up. Their natural, private sneezes cuter, softer.
“Hih’tschiew!”
“Eih- Eisshoo!”
“Ih’dschi!”
Bonus points if they’re very hitchy and try to talk between the hitches.
being an asexual sneeze fucker is crazy cause. why am i s3xually attracted to sneezes and sneezes only. Oh, ok, its not a thing to add to s3x its just SNEEZES??

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A snzfucker who just had the MESSIEST fit ever and is just . . . lingering in the mess. Leaned back idly playing with their nose, debating if they should clean up or get back to it.
I love that rough, closed-off man. Now make him desperately sneezy... Throw in some mess, yes, yes... Maybe a few nose rubs..
My nose is so itchy... can a hot person rub it for me, please?