#starryhoonie

When I first met Sunghoon I never thought it would be like this. I was studying in the library, cramming for an exam, and I noticed a very focused Sunghoon sitting next to me, so focused in fact he didn't notice himself reaching for my hot coffee instead of his cold tea. After one sip he was snapped out of his trance and immediately apologized, I giggled at his flustered state, we began talking and decided the way he could make it up to me. We met at a local cafe, after going a couple times together, and becoming “official” it kinda became our thing. We were different people then. A year later, we aren’t the same shy, timid, underclassmen anymore. Shit happens I guess…

I make my way to that same cafe, sitting at a table watching the rain slowly trickle down the window. Sunghoon walks in, as soon as we make eye contact I get that same feeling, the feeling I know too well, I love him, how I hate that feeling. He sits down and I’m immediately entranced in his words. “I’m sorry babe” he starts “Is that what you wanna hear, I’m sorry, I’m sorry for not being perfect and…” he keeps talking, I don’t even know why we were fighting in the first place. “Hoonie…” I cut him off, staring at him with eyes full of sympathy. He smiles at me knowing he’s back in my good graces. “Comon, let's go to my place” he stands, reaching out his hand. 

Being at Sunghoons place is strange, it doesn't quite feel like home, but it’s comforting. We sit and watch a movie we’ve seen a hundred times before cuddling up on the couch. He brings his hand towards me caresses my cheek, bringing me in for a kiss, escalating he grabs my waist and continues the kisses down my neck, he has me wrapped around his finger again, as we kiss I can’t think, he makes me throw caution to the wind, I feel him, breathe him, it’s all him, i hate it. 

He picks me up off the couch and I wrap my legs around his waist as he walks us to his room. He lays me on the bed and continues kissing down my chest removing my clothes one by one. He stares at me once I’m fully undressed, “You’re beautiful” he says “You know I love you right?” he half rhetorically asks as he kisses me, I don’t. 

He slowly rubs his tip against my entrance, hissing at the feeling of him sliding himself inside of me. I cry out as his cock stretches my cunt, I’ve never gotten used to his length. He slides himself in and out of me slowly, caressing my body as he does so savoring all of it as if this is the last time. I grab his shoulders, marking crescents into his back while doing so, he pumps himself in and out, the sound of heavy pants, slapping of skin and sloppy kisses fills my brain. Drunk off the way he makes me feel, the only things coming from my mouth are moans of pleasure, the only words I can convey are ‘please’ I don’t know what I’m asking for but he gives it to me, his thumb rubbing my clit as he fucks me harder than I could ever imagine, it’s not long till he brings me to my breaking point, “Are you gonna cum love?” The only response I can form is a string of repeated ‘yes.’ 

Sunghoon lets out a harsh moan as he releases, as soon as he does I’m falling apart in front of him, cumming onto his cock, as I do tears fall from my eyes, he wipes them away kissing my cheeks as I keep crying.  Sunghoons fast asleep as I re-dress myself, I grab his phone and delete my contact from it. I make my way out and head home, this is the last time. I think back on this past year, how we were, the dates, the jokes, the fights, but it’s time to let go. I let out my last few tears and dried my face. Walking watching the sunset, Goodbye Park Sunghoon.

After grabbing some coffee he gets a strange feeling, it’s 8 and she hasn’t texted, I thought we were good now. Dramatic as always. In class Sunghoon watches as the prof writes on the board, he starts spacing out, his leg shakes in an anxious manner. Tapping his finger on the table repeatedly, instinctively he takes out his phone, deciding to break the silence and being the first to text. The tapping grows louder as his nervousness rises, looking for your contact but he can’t seem to find it, finding it strange he searches for your text but to no avail, he can’t find it, his heart sinks a bit but continues to try. 

The only thing he can focus on is the rhythmic beating of the pad of his finger touching the desk, looking for all your social media for some form of reassurance, clicking on your profile, he’s met with a unexpected fate, user not found, the all too recognizable indicator that he was in fact blocked. 

Senses overwhelmed he doesn't know what to do, his head is spinning, he can feel the bile rise in his throat. Quickly he grabs his things heading straight for the door, his feet carry him to god knows where. The only thing going through his head is a series of ‘why’s and pleas, he has no idea who he's pleading with or for what exactly. He finds himself at your dorm, he knocks but no answer, he calls out for you repeatedly, pounding more aggressively every time. People pass and give weird stares, whispering, and gossiping, but he can’t seem to care. Little does he know you sit on the other side of that door, silently watching with a blank stare no more, you repeat to yourself, you won’t allow him to control you anymore. 

The knocks die down slowly as you hear quiet sobs, his voice breaking as he lets out one last call of your name. A single tear rolls down your cheek, you hear footsteps walk away, once he’s far enough you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in. 

No more. Park Sunghoon, no more.