(Dean x Reader if you tilt sideways - Sprinkles of Destiel if you stand on your head.)

A/N:  I’m sorry.  I wasn’t going to go here. askspnbbverse (late to the party as the blog is no longer updated) has killed me, I am dead, and also all my teeth fell out because it’s so GOD DAMN ADORABLE.  GO LOOK AT IT! Quick background - Cas/Gabe/Balthazar are turned into tiny fledgling toddlers by some witches. It’s ridiculously ridiculous. Sam/Dean/Bobby are left to care for them while they work on breaking said curse. Cas is literally the cutest thing on the planet during this time. Some fluff, some feels.

You’ve heard the whispers. Who hasn’t? Hunters are notorious gossips. So when you find yourself out for a drink with Castiel and Dean, you work up the courage to ask about said rumors. Well, to be technical the courage comes from a little vodka.

“So.”

Dean slants his eyes. “Kid, this better be good. It’s been a long day. I’m not here to chat, I’m just here to drink and forget.“

Cas, bless him, looks a little more encouraging. “I have found that ‘So’ is an excellent conversation starter. Go on.”

“So. I heard a small little rumor. About the two of you.”

Dean groans.  "Nope.  Nope Nope. We share a…what do you call it, dude?“  

Cas leans closer. “Profound bond.”

“Yes. A profound bond but we ain’t-”

“Whoa whoa!  Calm down. I could care less if you two bump uglies or not. This has to do with you, Cas, two other angels and some witches.”

Dean visibly pales, his freckles standing out. Cas puts down his rocks glass with a clatter. Oh shiiiit.  You figured they’d laugh, just deny it.  Dean looks around frantically. “Who told you?  Who knows about this?”  

You squeal, positively delighted. “Oh my god so it’s TRUE!  I can’t even believe it. Are there photographs? Please tell me there are. I need to see these adorable baby angels.”

Dean turns to Cas. “Wipe her memory immediately.”  

Cas shakes his head. “I can’t do that, Dean. She’s our friend.”

“Well then I’m getting her drunk enough to forget this all happened.”

When you wake up the next morning the details of the previous evening are hazy, muddled by your wicked hangover, but they’re still there. Dean dodged your barrage of questions all night.  Cas would only tell you that things were “Much larger” from that perspective and he really liked his trench coat.  

Stumbling into the kitchen, Sam’s already there making breakfast. He takes one look at you, hair standing in a poof on the side of your head and a gigantic bottle of ibuprofen at your side, and slides a cup of coffee and a stack of pancakes in front of you.  

“Rough night?”

“The worst. Your brother can really deliver when he gets it in his head to get someone turnt, that dick.”

Sam laughs. “Oh jesus. Yep, been there.”  He clears his throat. “I might have something that will make your hangover slightly better.”

“Oh god Sam, if it’s hair of the dog, I’m not interested. It doesn’t work. I just feel worse. I need a greasy tuna melt and fries.”  

His phone dangles in front of you. “How about some requested incriminating photos?”

Your head snaps up, hands grabbing desperately for the phone. “Oh. My. God. Sam. Please tell me you’re not jerking me around.”  

He slides into the seat next to you. “Dean and Bobby never wanted any pictures taken. Balthazar and Gabriel ganged up to try to break my phone. But I couldn’t resist sneaking some shots in. It was literally about as cute and as horrible as you could ever imagine.”

Your finger starts swiping eagerly.  

There’s a sleepy eyed Cas, so tiny and itty bitty your heart seizes for a moment, dragging his trench behind him, thumb jammed in his mouth. His eyes are so huge and friggin’ blue he basically looks like a chibi anime character come to life.  

“He has little wings!” you breathe, and Sam rolls his eyes. 

“They couldn’t fly, so the wings were basically like giant feather dusters, collecting dust and dirt and food. Bath time was a disaster.”

Gabriel and Balthazar, playing catch with Bobby, little trucker hats perched on their heads. They looked like absolute little shits - some things didn’t change.  

All three babies, nested together and napping in a pile of dirty laundry. You’re absolutely incredulous at the sheer adorable-ness, it makes your chest hurt a little. “How the hell did you guys get anything accomplished?”

“It was rough. Dean was the worst.  I don’t think he ever put Cas down. Out of everyone, Cas was especially…”  Sam pauses, searching for the right word. “Snuggly.”  

To punctuate, the next photo is Dean asleep on the couch, all three of the angels sleeping with him. Cas is clutched to his chest, Dean’s hands in his feathery black wings. Balthazar and Gabriel on each side.  

Everything’s gone a little blurry, and you look away and blink rapidly.  Sam takes the phone back. “That’s all I could get.” He looks a little wistful.  “As frustrating as the spell was, it was something awful when they all went back to being dickbag angels.  It was really hard on all of us, but especially for Dean. He and Cas….yeah.”  You sniffle and pretend to be really interested in your coffee cup. 

“How you feelin’ today, sunshine?”  Dean’s robe flaps around his knees as he walks over to the coffee maker.  You and Sam must be wearing identical expressions as you both snap your gaze up to look at him and he freezes. “What the hell is wrong with you guys?  Someone die or something?”

When you’re up out of the chair and sandwiching him in a crushing hug in 2.2 seconds, he turns to Sam with wide eyes. “Sammy what the hell?! Did you do something?” 

Sam looks apologetic.  “I uh…there may have been some cursed angel photos.”  He slips back down the hallway, leaving Dean shaking his head.  

When Sam pokes his head back in a few minutes later you’re still wrapped in Dean’s arms, his hands tangled in your hair.

Later that week Sam catches Dean red handed, stealthily trying to heist his phone. “Give it back, dude.  Check the drawer in your bedside table.”

Stuffed in the far reaches of the drawer is a photo, one that you didn’t see - little Cas perched on Dean’s shoulders, tiny hands fisted in his hair with a gummy grin.