i never trust a narcissist, but they love me -- so i play 'em like a violin ;
LEE RACHEL • FUTURE DREAMS S2 • ENTRANCE
rachel opted out of the first season of future dreams, half because she saw it as strictly for the trainees that hoped to become idols, and half because, like all new things, it could be disaster. obviously proven wrong on both counts, when season two is announced, it isn’t necessarily a question of whether or not she was going to enter, but just how she was going to spin herself- to spin the carefully curated image she had worked for since she was barely old enough to understand the concept of show business.
on the twentieth when she’s brought to the salon along with the rest of the horde of trainees that seemed to have a change of heart, she finds relaxation in surprisingly tense muscles as the stylist straightens her hair, turning the end of the straightener so that the front frames her face almost angelically- which sets rachel’s inner narrative on a new path, calculating the benefit already while appearing stoic as ever.
“how are you feeling about being here?” they question, and rachel, ever the performer, plays the part of the nervously excited trainee, “nervous, of course!” she laughs, tossing hair over her shoulder as she gives a bright smile. “legacy has plenty of talented trainees, i’m only one of them.” seemingly satisfied with her answer, the questions continue, following a typical narrative, and rachel is all smiles and fakery aglow, playing the role she’s carefully crafted thus far perfectly.
“most trainees pick one of the higher numbers, why did you pick eight?” the question she’d been waiting for- the opportunity to paint herself a humble picture, and she begins with a nervous laugh, fingers knotting and then un-knotting, as if the question were embarrassing to her. “i know that i’m talented, but when put up against everyone else, i don’t think i have a big chance. it’s better to place myself lower now than make enemies by picking a higher position, don’t you think?”
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As soon as you arrive at the company on March 2nd, you are asked to report to Kim Hyuncheol’s office. The man is waiting for you, Heo Aecha at his side. It’s the first time you’ve seen her since your first meeting. As soon as you come in, they both greet you and Kim Hyuncheol asks you to close the door and take a seat. None of them seem to be about to scold you, yet they arbor rather serious looks. While last time, Aecha did most of the talking, today, it’s Hyuncheol who does the speaking: “Rachel, we called on you because you are a current cast member of Future Dreams. The winner of this season has yet to be decided but the company is already currently looking into the future of Future Dreams Project. While your involvement with it isn’t completely over yet, you have a choice to make right now; whether you want this involvement to be minimal or to continue to be a part of it.” He pauses and finally, Aecha speaks: “We aren’t allowed to reveal what’s coming, but I have to be honest with you; if you choose to accept this offer, this will limit you temporarily in your acting career.” This sounds more like a warning than a precision. Hyuncheol continues: “once again, the decision is yours to make. If you refuse to continue with this project, don’t worry, there are others ready to grab on this opportunity.”
I must be popular this year. Rachel thinks as she’s sent right to Hyuncheol’s office again this morning. She has less trepidation in her heart this time though, because last time it was good news, and she hasn’t done anything (yet) to mess up her good chances. (Not that she would dare to, as this is actually messing with her future.)
She traces the well-worn path to the office only to be greeted with solemn looks that strike a small chord of fear into her- had she screwed it up after all? If she had been caught somehow with Jeongha she would never forgive herself for it. They were careful, it couldn’t have been that. Somehow, Rachel manages to muster a small, yet polite smile and greet them both in return before she sits, folding her hands in her lap in an attempt to cover the way she was itching to fidget with something to alleviate her tension.
She listens carefully, blinking in surprise as she processes the information and allows a small portion of relief to flood out the nerves. She hasn’t lost her chance, and they’re giving her a choice. Future Dreams seemed like something of a hail mary pass to her in the first place, and now, what she’s hearing is that she can practically leave the torment in order to support her career, and they’re allowing it.
Hyuncheol and Aecha continue, and as soon as they conclude, Rachel’s head shakes right away. “I don’t have to think on this.” She begins, “With all due respect sir,” she directs towards Hyuncheol, maybe a little apologetically, but confidently “I don’t want to be an idol… I will gladly forfeit my position in the project if it means being allowed to do more of what I really have a passion for. Thank you for allowing me to make the choice for myself.”
LEE RACHEL • SIDE EVENT 007 • LGCCHARITYDAY • FARMING • REFLECTING
by mid-afternoon, rachel wonders why farmers in general aren’t as appreciated as much as they should be. even though it’s only for a day, it feels like she’s learned more already in a few hours than she would have anywhere else. depending on the farmer, some wives would wait all day at the edge of the fields with cool towels and water for workers suffering from heat stress, and every hour someone was doing a fresh water run for the ones still out in the field.
sure, the sun would make for an unsightly tan, and the humidity kind of made her feel like dying at any given moment, but rachel was happy to help, and based on the elders’ appreciation towards them for their volunteered time, rachel really intended on going back in the future to help more. there definitely was no shortage of work to be done, and based on conversations with a few of the other farmers, even winter was a busy season too.
even though she absolutely reeks thanks to a fall in one of the pig pens, and previously adored 'casual' pants are stained likely beyond repair, it feels like she's done more a good deed than she thought she would have, even if she wasn't much help when it came to lifting feed bags or helping move hay bales.
it’s no big secret that rachel isn’t really a singer. sure, the basics of a great voice are there; but vocal technique, the ability to confidently perform independently with her voice, anything near true melisma skill, they were all lacking, and that happened to be just the sore spot that left her in the back of vocal classes, never volunteering vocalizing at much less of a volume than the others in her training class. always doing just enough to get by, just enough not to be reprimanded, just enough.
until she’s singled out one morning schedule, asked to stay behind- which only gives rise to embarrassment and frustration. “you’re not putting in full effort during training,” coach kim chides her, as if she were parent to a stubborn child. rachel sighs, knowing she’s been effectively noticed. “as a trainee it’s your responsibility to put in the same amount of effort as we put in to you.” oh rachel knows, but she’s not about to bite back with how she felt singing practically useless since it wasn’t her goal to become an idol anyway. “yes coach,” she responds, shamefully, but only for the fact that she was caught, and not for holding back in the first place.
“look, kid,” a steady hand rests itself on her shoulder as rachel’s gaze is met. “you’ve only been here a few months, and i’d hate to be starting on a bad footing with you. you have potential, or you wouldn’t be here. don’t waste the opportunities given to you.” sufficiently scolded, the trainee nearly responds with an automatic ‘yes ma’am’ as if it really were her mother she was speaking to, instead nodding mutely.
“vocal runs, now, until i say you’re done. and maybe you’ll learn to put in more effort into lessons you don’t find important.”
LEE RACHEL • LGC PROJECT ORIGIN • CHARACTER CREATION
for as long as she can remember, rachel has loved musicals- she’s only been a part of maybe two small productions, minor roles when she was a kid- but it’s because of them that she developed the passion for singing and dancing that she did, and those that bolstered her commitment to acting. she loves every aspect about them, how everything comes together so quickly and flawlessly, and how carefully managed every detail of them is, even when things go awry.
when told that they have to create their own characters, rachel’s mind starts churning right away, exploring possible aspects of the universe and just what she could be- if her character was exceptionally skilled or rather bad at being a knight, how she would choose to reflect herself within it. her mind focuses so quickly that at first, rachel doesn’t hear her dismissal, only noticing when the trainee next to her nudges her and points at the staff in front, looking at her expectantly. her cheeks colored, and she bowed her head as she left, though her mind still whirred with possibilities, all other thoughts set aside as she began working on her ideas.
“hello! i’m here to present my character idea for the project,” she starts, “my knoght, whom i haven’t named yet,” she laughs, albeit a little nervously, “will be a young one, who is frequently tasked with running errands for the other knights.” rachel smiles, “this knight was a page for a long time, and gathered lots of knowledge by working under the other knights for a long time, and was recently promoted to receive knight training herself. she knows the technicalities of things, but her physical execution of knightly duties is rather stiff. while the knight is proficient with a sword and capable of holding her own in battle, their skill lies much more in tending to the other knights, caring for wounds on the battlefield and using her knowledge on expeditions and war games.”
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It’s been a little while since rachel has truly acted- putting on a facade for a reality show and actually embodying a character are two very different things, though rachel takes both seriously. when the word goes forth that legacy is casting for their first web drama, it’s not a matter of deciding whether or not she’ll audition, but the manner in which she will. and there’s no question that she’s going for a lead.
The prompt is tiny, much different than the audition prompts she would receive when she was younger, but perhaps there’s a certain expectation in the freedom of such; a test of an auditioner’s creativity, they way that they can make a scene work with only so little to go on.
thankfully, rachel is not all too unfamiliar with making things up on the spot- or rolling with the punches thrown her way. she reads over the premise of the show intently, studies the main characters’ given backgrounds as if they were her own, but standing in the audition room, with these freshly given instructions, her mind whirs at the possible ideas- entirely too many of them to comb through in only fifteen minutes.
so she takes her time, games out in her head which ones are most appealing, which ones the other actor could bounce off of (kim heejin, today) with ease. she prefers it this way, though, building a rapport between herself and another actor rather than acting a monologue, though she does enjoy her fair share of them.
“i’m tired.” heejin leads, and rachel nods, playing the role of a supporting friend, and recalling her own time in high school. “ah, we shouldn’t have stayed up so late watching the new movie,” she whines, “my neck hurts from watching the screen for so long,” rachel sighs, “did we really have to watch the whole documentary for your report?”
and so it continues until its inevitable conclusion, and rachel is dismissed, suddenly transported back to the days of waiting by a phone and praying for a good news call, though this time, with a little more confidence.
back in the day (more like back when she was bored and not busy), rachel used to be a regular vlogger- the kind that creates beauty tutorials that seem effortlessly easy, sprinkled with lavish lifestyle clips and ones that painted rachel every bit the rich bitch she was. that, coupled with years of damage from a childhood acting career, made vlogging as easy as breathing.
“hello hello, yours truly,” she greets her camera with a grin, “do you have goals for this year? i’m sure you do, right?” she banters easily, animatedly discussing things with a nobody as if she were talking to a friend. “well, my goal this year is to become a better dancer.” she concludes satisfactorily. it was a passion she used to have, still had, really, that she had let fall by the wayside in favor of honing her acting skill- only staying just enough in shape to keep up with the others (and regretting it, lately). “i used to dance a lot when i was younger, but then i fell out of it, and now, i look like i have no skill at all compared to most of the other trainees, right?” she laughs, “it’s okay, we can be honest with each other, i have thick skin.” rachel teases, “so, my goal is that by the end of this year, i can do a full choreography while singing, as if it were a live performance. i can do it, right?” she nods, “we’ll work hard toward it, and i will report back when i’ve completed my goal!”
with that said, she moves the camera from its closer framed position to reveal the practice room she had been filming in. “i have to film it to start so that we know how well i’ve improved when i come back.” she grins, turning on a famiiar senior song, one known for being more challenging, and runs through the choreo on her own.
