#smiledsweet

     THE   FUCKING   LIST.      of   fucking   course   everyone   else   stacked   up   against   her   ends   up   on   the   positive   columns   of   the   list,   whereas   she’s   left   with     ‵ worst   ass   in   the   freshman   class  ‵.      it   feels   like   everyone   is   staring   at   her   as   she   walks   into   the   cafeteria,   but   instead   she   finds   boys   ogling   at   another     ┅    good,   she   figures,   but   then   a   compulsion   rises   to   figure   out   why   they’re   staring   as   prying   eyes   have   yet   to   find   it   for   herself.      setting   her   tray   down   on   the   table,   jess   forces   a   smile   and   tucks   hair   behind   her   ear,     ❝   are   you   on   it   too?    ❞   she   asks,   glancing   across   the   cafeteria   to   a   group   of   guys   staring   without   remorse.      ❝ it looks like you are.  ❞

                  –––––––––– ❝ I KNOW YOU PROBABLY HEARD THIS ABOUT A MILLION TIMES. But –– are you okay? ❞

he’d just scene the other guys on the baseball team do some really shitty things to a completely random kid in the hallway. of course he didn’t participate, but he didn’t do anything to stop it either. well, he’d tried a little, but nothing would stop a pack lead by bryce and montgomery. he feels guilty and ashamed. he’s not sure now much more of this he can take before he just bursts. he doesn’t want to be known like this, and feared by the other students. he just wants to be the nice guy his mother and father had raised him to be. even if that meant going invisible at school. it would sure beat this. his once confident demeanor has shifted since the whole hannah baker deal, and after the incident in the hallway he hangs his head low as he enters the class room and takes his seat. shit. he forgot about the stupid worksheet. grabbing the sheet and a pencil from his bag he quickly turns to the girl next to him. “hey, did you finish the homework?” this was a rare case for him, he always had things done, but his brain was elsewhere these days. he hadn’t been like this since his fathers passing. 

       ❛   ARE PARTIES HERE   always   this...   rowdy   ?      ❜   eyes   scanned   the   unfamiliar   living   room,   from   drunken   jocks   bumping   chests   to   various   couples   making   out.   the   girl   opposed   from   her   seemed   like   the   only   approachable   human   in   the   vicinity. 

❛ 'cause I just feel so TIRED, like it's move or slowly die. ❜