sakura: “little spat”??? are you talking about the extended period of time when you actively wanted to kill him??

My fic for Locklyle Week 2023, Day 6: Songs! 

@locklyle-week

Sorry this took so long - I started it on Sunday, but apparently the con took more out of me than i expected!

6 I’m sorry kiss    /  15  Kisson the back

So i kinda worked both in there, but it’s definitely more geared towards the I’m Sorry

“I’m sorry,” Deansnapped out angrily after slamming Baby’s door shut and stalking away, leavingCas glaring after him. They both knew it wasn’t really an apology.

“What exactly are you sorry for? Do you even know?” Casgrowled, catching up to him in a few short steps.

Dean rolled his eyes and threw his hands in the air. “Whatever.”

“Dean, don’t do this.”

“Do what, Cas? We’ve just returned from a goddamn exhaustinghunt.  I’m dirty, hungry and tired. And I’mgoing to take care of those things, in that order.” He turned away but Cascaught his arm and held him back.

“Don’t walk away in anger. Don’t dismiss what happenedtonight. You almost got yourself killed – again– and for what? Because you didn’t wait for your brother to back you up. You needto be more careful!” Cas said, his hands clenched in frustration.

Dean shrugged him off. “I refuse to feel guilty because Ihelp people, Cas. I didn’t have time to wait for Sam. Besides, it’s not likeyou don’t go charging in halfcocked whenever there are angels involved. Whatmakes this any different?”

“What makes it different? Dean, you don’t need to do thisalone. You take unnecessary risks. I know the life of a hunter is hard, but I’mhere now too. You don’t have to – “

“I? I take unnecessaryrisks? Me?” Dean’s eyes were wide indisbelief and he laughed without humor. He wiped his hand across his face andmuttered, “Un-fucking-believable. I need a fucking drink.” When he turned andstalked away this time, Cas let him go.

As soon as Dean was out of sight, Cas’s shoulders slumpeddownwards. He didn’t want to fight with Dean, but how could he make the hunterrealize he was worth a few extra minutes of consideration? That he was loved?That he would be missed?

A flap of his wings and Cas set down on roof of the bunker –not far, never far if he could help it - watching the sunset. He stared at thesky for hours, watching the colors bleeding into night, at the stars thattwinkled into existence, dotting the heavens like the freckles on Dean’s face.

With a sigh, he flapped back inside, into Dean’s room. Unlikethe past, there were no bottles of beer or alcohol of any kind strewn about theroom. In fact, it was all very neat. Dean was curled up on his side of the bed,a small light on the other beside table still lit. The covers there drawn back,waiting.

“I’m sorry,” Dean whispered as Cas crawled into their bed. Dean’sback was turned to Cas, but the contrition was real. Cas wrapped his armsaround Dean and pulled him close.

“I’m sorry, too, Dean,” Cas said softly, pressing a kissonto Dean’s bare shoulders. Dean placed his hand over Cas’s, his fingersslotting down around and into the angels. He shuddered as Cas pressed anotherkiss along his spine.

Dean rolled over and tucked his chin into Cas’s shoulder,his lips brushing the Angel’s ear as he spoke. “No, Cas, god…you’ve got nothing tobe sorry for.” Dean took a deep breath, his fingers tightening on the angels. “I’msorry. I’m sorry for rushing in. Sorry for not calling you or Sam for help whenI realized I’d need backup. Sorry I got mad at you when you were only concernedabout me. I’m sorry for driving you away…forso many things, Cas, I’m so goddamned sorry. I don’t know how you even putup with me.”

Dean’s voice cracked and burrowed deeper into Cas’s shoulderwith a shiver. Castiel wrapped an arm around Dean, pulling him closer.

“You didn’t drive me away, Dean. I love you. You could neverdrive me away. And I put up with you because you may be reckless with your ownlife, but it’s for all the right reasons. You do help people, so many of them. And it is often times such athankless job, but you do it anyway. I admire that about you. I just wish youwould believe me when I tell you how good you are, that your life is just asvaluable as the people you save.”

Cas could feel wetness hit his cheeks and he knew withoutlooking that Dean was crying.

“Okay, Cas, I’ll try. But only if you promise to as well. Tostop throwing yourself in harm’s way whenever Heaven’s involved, okay? Cause ifI die, I’ve been promised an express pass to Heaven. But if you die…Cas…I don’twant to lose you either,” Dean whispered.

“Then it’s a deal?” Cas asked, pulling back slightly to lookDean in the eyes.

Dean smiled and raised himself up on his elbow to betterlean in. “Yeah, it’s a deal.” He kissed Cas softly. “I’m sorry I’m such anidiot sometimes.”

“Hmm…but you’re my idiot, and I’m yours.”

Hey, you guys! I’ve just finished typing up Chapter 15 of IASWASB! So, I’ll leave you with a preview of the chapter, which will be uploaded shortly:

"Why didn't you use the safe word?" he asked. Yuu's hand hovered over the door handle, taken aback by the sudden question. "What...do you mean? I didn't need to use it." Yuu replied. "Don't lie. I can tell that you were going to use it at some point." Yuu could tell that Mika was gritting his teeth without even looking at him. "I was going too rough, wasn't I?" he asked. Yuu's heart tugged painfully at how upset Mika sounded. Mika had no right to feel upset. Yuu chose to mot use the safe word mainly because he felt like he didn't need to. While it did hurt, it wasn't so painful that it would push Yuu to use the safe word. "Okay, yes. I was contemplating using the safe word. But, the pain just began to fade away after a little whi- - -" Mika cut him off. "Then, why didn't you use it?! You should've said it!" Yuu looked over at Mika, surprised at how pained Mika looked. "You may not believe it, but there is a limit to how rough I can be with you! If you're feeling hurt, then you need to stop me! If you don't tell me and I end up hurting you---!" Mika trailed off, his teeth gritted in frustration. Yuu was also beginning to feel frustrated. How could Mika not see that everything was okay? Yuu knew completely well what he was getting himself into, so it shouldn't have been such a big deal. He then leaned in towards Mika before he could stop himself. His lips brushed against Mika's temple, startling the blond. "Mika." Yuu gave him a serious look. "Stop feeling so guilty. I've told you a million times that it was something that I wanted. And the reason why I didn't use the safe word was because I didn't want you to feel upset or guilty. So, please don't beat yourself up like that. All that matters is that I'm fine." he said.

Me: -scrolling through netflix- what do you guys wanna watch?

Lil brother: Your face.

Mom: you must really admire his face--- oops I mean "her" face

Me: mom it's okay, we went over this I'm flexible with either pronoun.

Mom: let's not get into that okay?!

Me: Ma, I'm just sayin it's o-