#sjmxreaderweek2026

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He watched you from the shadows, hazel eyes taking in every movement, every breath. You were the one thing he couldn’t keep himself from, and nearly couldn’t control himself when in your presence.

Not that you’d seen him before, or had even talked to him.

He’d been very careful to stay out of sight, to keep his affections secret. Fear of rejection ran deep in his blood, and he would be damned if he lost you before he’d ever had a chance to truly have you. So he watched, his shadows watched, monitoring your movements throughout the city.

You liked the café closest to your cottage, and went there every morning for at least a coffee if not breakfast. The bookstore next to the Sidra and a shop filled with threads, fabrics, and yarn in every shade were your favorite haunts. You worked in a nursery, tending to plant after plant with unwavering patience. Once a week your friends dragged you to Rita’s to blow off steam and you danced without a care in the world, the hem of your dress riding dangerously high up, attracting not only Azriel’s attention, but that of many a single male.

Those nights made his blood boil, knowing that you weren’t his yet, giving him no right to protect you from their vile gazes. Not that it stopped him.

Occasionally, he would let his shadows trail after you, ensuring that you made it home safely while he stalked after one of the males who had stared at you so brazenly. Truthteller easily wrung their secrets from them, and the pain they felt distracted Azriel from his soul deep need for you for the night. No one questioned where they went, and Azriel gave himself the slightest pat on the back for ridding Velaris of its filth.

Tonight, you were in the bookstore late. His shadows had whispered that you had finished a book not long ago, and had immediately made for the cozy store in search of the next volume.

While Velaris was usually safe, tonight there were a few males about, likely with less than stellar plans for how the night should turn out. But, there was a possibility that everything would work out perfectly in his favor tonight. While he hated the idea of you being scared for even a second, he despised the thought of you not being his even more.

Azriel continued watching you from across the street, tracking your movements through the glass windows and waiting for the right opportunity to strike.

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You knew it was a foolish idea, running to the bookstore after dark, but after finishing that book you had to have the next one, too greedy to wait one more sunrise to begin reading it.

Velaris was safe, you knew that. Nothing bad would happen to you on your walk home, and if it did - well, it wouldn’t.

You shook your head from your thoughts as your fingers ran over spine after spine, the smell of parchment filling your nose pleasantly. The sequel to the book you were reading was already in your grasp, and now you were looking for the last two in the series. One trip, three books. It would make the chilled air that much more worth it on your walk home, knowing that you had plenty of reading materials for the next few days.

"Find everything that you were looking for?” Gianna asked once you placed your finds on the counter, and you nodded.

“I always do,” you giggled, sliding over the gold pieces that you owed her while she placed your books into a small cloth bag, drawing the strings tightly to keep any possible moisture off of the precious items. “I’ll see you in a few days. Have a good night!” you said cheerily as you walked out the door, bag in hand.

“Get home safe!” Gianna called after you and you nodded, even if she couldn’t see it.

The walk home was only fifteen minutes in the day, though you walked more carefully now, unwilling to trip on uneven stones and scrape your skin. The wind whistled in your ears as you went, shivers wracking you every now and then when a particularly vicious gust would hit you. The streets leading to your home were mostly deserted, only a few people lingering about at this hour of night, before the real partying would begin.

You had the oddest sensation of being watched as you rounded the corner that put you on your street, the hair on the back of your neck prickling. You just barely managed to stop just before you slammed face-first into a male, lips already opening to apologize.

“Look what we have here, boys,” the male said, his voice low. “A pretty girl, all alone.”

Two other males came out of nowhere, surrounding you and pressing you against the wall. The stone bit into your back through your cloak and your heart hammered in your chest as you weighed your options. There was little you could do against three people, and you were unlikely to be able to outrun them if you managed to break away, but that was your only viable option. You gripped the bag in your hands tighter, preparing yourself to swing at the male to your right.

“What are you doing out here, sweet thing?” one of them asked, leaning in to close to sniff your neck. A shudder went through you, fear spilling through your veins.

“I think we should take you back to our place, keep you nice and warm,” the third said, two fingers tilting your head up to look him in the eyes. They were black and soulless, filled with promises of torment.

The first male chuckled at the suggestion. “That’s the best idea you’ve had in ages. Let’s go,” he said, a hand coming to grasp your arm.

You tried to wrench yourself free of his grasp, knowing that it was now or never if you wanted your freedom, to no avail. He began to tug you in the opposite direction of your house, your fear turning to full blown panic.

"I would stop where you are," a mysterious, commanding voice said from behind you.

“And I would tell you to mind your busine-” The male holding your arm dropped it as soon as he turned to look at the newcomer, fear shining in his eyes. “Oh, we- uhm-” He sprinted away, his cronies following him soon after.

You stared after them for a moment in disbelief before turning to face your savior. Your breath was stolen from you when you saw his face. His hazel eyes shined with warmth, and with his high cheekbones and elegant nose, he was perhaps the most handsome male that you had ever seen. Dark curls rested upon his head, paired perfectly with his golden-brown skin. The leathery, massive wings behind him only added to his allure.

“Are you alright, sweetheart?” he asked softly, hazel eyes flicking over you in search of any injuries. You nodded your head, not feeling up to speaking quite yet. “Would you like for me to walk you home? I would hate for anything else to happen to you.”

You supposed you should have rejected his offer, after what had almost happened, but he had saved you. “Yes, please,” you said quietly, taking small steps towards him. The two of you walked in a peaceful silence as you approached your cottage, your fear ebbing away with each step by his side. By the time you reached your door, you felt safe once more. “This is me.”

“Very well. I do hope you’ll be more careful in the future,” the male said, moving to turn away from you.

“Wait!” He stopped in his tracks. “What’s your name?”

“Azriel, sweetheart,” he said with a soft smile. “And yours?”

You introduced yourself, blushing when he repeated your name - it had never sounded as lovely as it did when he said it.

“Stay safe, Y/N. And have a good night,” Azriel said, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand before leaving you alone on your doorstep.

When you entered your home and slid the lock back into place, you still felt your cheeks burning from the contact between your skin and his lips.

Azriel… So he was your High Lord’s Spymaster…

You wondered if you would ever see him again. If you were being honest… You hoped that you would.

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General Taglist: @daughterofthemoons-stuff @lilah-asteria @meritxellao @twismare @wrenisrad @icey--stars @le-nottibianche @archerxnn @littlest-w01f

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Cassian was distracted - all because of you. He still had yet to learn your name, but just watching you dance, eat, talk with others had him hooked.

You were a shining light amongst the dreariness of the Hewn City, a smile always on your face.

And a ring on your finger.

Cassian watched you closely, looking to see what males you lingered near, hoping to find which male you were engaged to. For innocent reasons, of course, like beating the living hell out of him until he relinquished his claim on you, leaving you free for Cassian to woo.

Or perhaps he would simply claim you, and let Rhys figure out the details…

No, Cassian scolded himself. He would do this the right way, or not at all.

Unless it took too long to have you properly.

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You grimaced into your wine, hoping that the expression was hidden by the goblet it was in. Earl Morrisse was… Not your favorite person to be around.

And yet still, you were engaged to him.

Your father had insisted upon the match, knowing that it was the only way to free himself from his debts. And, it would bring more power to him, though why he needed more power over a happy daughter, you would never understand. After countless fights ending in the same outcome, you had resigned yourself to your fate. There was nothing you could do to change your father’s mind. After all, the match had been made when you were born, and in the twenty-one years since, he hadn’t budged one bit.

You downed the rest of your drink before excusing yourself to exchange your glass for a fresh one, enjoying the thirty or so seconds you had to be free of your betrothed. Thankfully he was on his best behavior tonight due to the High Lord and his inner circle’s presence, keeping his grubby paws to himself. It disgusted you to the core that he would be your only lover for your entire life.

Perhaps you could avoid it for the rest of time once you got through your wedding night…

You swapped your glass, thanking the servant and allowing yourself to take a deep sip before you were to turn back. Just as you went to turn around, your upper arm was caught in a firm grip. When you saw it was Cassian, the High Lord’s general, your face went white.

What had you done wrong?

“Hello, there,” Cassian said, releasing his grip on you once he saw your startled face. “My name is Cassian, and you are…?”

Your eyes flicked past him to look at your High Lord, whose eyes were elsewhere. A breath of relief left you before you replied, “Y/N Winmore. It’s a pleasure to meet you, my lord.” You curtsied lowly, hoping that whatever he wanted, it would be over quickly.

“Winmore, as in Duke Riohr Winmore?” Cassian asked with a cocked head, eyes locked on the table behind you, where Earl Morrisse sat. You nodded your head. “How a pretty thing such as you is related to him, I can’t understand.”

Your cheeks turned pink at his flattery. “Thank you, my lord, but I really should be getting back…”

“Do you want to?”

“What?” You blinked at him. “Of course I do, the Earl is my betrothed.”

“Betrothed, yes, but you looked like you would rather be anywhere else than sitting by him,” Cassian said, grinning when you didn’t protest. “Come, sit with me for a while. You can say I intimidated you, if he gives you any trouble later.”

You bit your lip, looking back at the Earl who was staring at you with his beady eyes, ire already shining in them. “I suppose I can, for a moment.” You let Cassian lead you closer to the High Lord which had your nerves rising, then sat you at the first table to the left of his throne. A servant immediately came by and placed two fresh glasses of wine down, plus an assortment of hors d’oeuvres plated on a silver platter.

“Try this wine instead,” Cassian suggested, swiping your current glass from your hand and draining it in a few quick sips. You didn’t miss the way that his tongue darted out to lick his lips, the sight sending your heart fluttering. He was rather handsome, even if he still terrified you with his height and looming wings, plus all the dreadful stories you had been told about him by your family. “Try it,” Cassian said, nudging one of the new glasses towards you with a finger.

You gave him a tight smile before lifting the glass to your lips, delighting at the fizzy brightness of the wine. It was far better than what was passed around to the main crowd, though you supposed that you shouldn’t be surprised by the increased quality for a member of the inner circle. “It’s lovely,” you said softly when he looked at you expectantly.

“I’m glad that you like it, sweetheart. Now, tell me how a pretty young thing like you comes to be engaged to an ugly old bastard like Morrisse.”

“Well…” You thought about sparing him the ugly truth of it, that it was due to a terrible gambling debt that your father had with Morrisse, over a century before you were born. “Being my father’s first born. He owed the Earl, and he chose his first born as equal payment.”

“Surely that can’t be the only reason,” Cassian prodded, eyes widening slightly when you shook your head.

“It is. My father said that there’s no way around the deal, and I must go through with the marriage in order for the debt to be settled finally. I’ve tried to change his mind…”

“But your father is a Duke, surely he can repay the Earl now,” Cassian said thoughtfully. “Unless it was a bargain.”

You flashed him the tattoo on your wedding finger, a solid band of black ink standing in place of an engagement ring. “I bear the mark, and have since I was a child.”

Fury entered Cassian’s hazel eyes and you snatched your hand away from his view, burying it in your skirts. “I’m sure the High Lord could think of a way out of the bargain for you,” Cassian suggested. “I can think of one way already.” You raised a brow at him. “I could kill him for you,” he said seriously, laughing when your eyes went wide. “I’m joking, Y/N. No need to look so scandalized.”

You nodded your head, still spooked by his words. While you didn’t care for the Earl, you definitely didn’t wish for him to die. “Alright. I do think I should be getting back now.”

“At least try a few of these,” Cassian said, pointing at the food still before you.

“Only a few, and then I’m leaving,” you said.

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Cassian escorted you back to your betrothed, a disgusting looking male that he now knew to be Earl Morrisse. How vile, for a male to claim an unborn child as payment for a simple gambling debt. And what an awful father you had, for him to agree. After hearing that information, Cassian had needed to force himself to stay seated, to not rush over to the bastard and smash his face in for you.

But you… You had seem comfortable enough with your fate, as if you had accepted that you would be married to that male.

Cassian would change that. It would be easy enough to ask Azriel to take care of the Earl for you, but Cassian wanted to do it himself. After seeing your eyes lingering on his lips, he knew it would only take a little push to have you in his arms. And with the Earl out of the way, he suspected you would have no issue with becoming his betrothed.

Which was perfect, as his patience was wearing thing. Only a week of observing you, and Cassian was ready to claim you in front of the entire revel, your sensibilities be damned.

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A week passed, and Cassian was in attendance of each revel, and his eyes burned into you every second you were in the room. He didn’t approach you again, but the weight of his attention was something you couldn’t ignore. When you met his gaze, you felt dizzy with need, and it led to you dressing in your most lovely dresses each night, hoping to entice him into asking you for a dance.

You were engaged, after all, not married. You could dance with whoever you liked until your wedding night, and Cassian seemed like he would be a thrilling partner. Toeing the line of impropriety would be the perfect end to your freedom.

Still, he didn’t ask you to dance. It was somewhat disappointing, but perhaps he was a male that valued the sanctity of bargains. Either way, you kept a smile on your face, hoping to convince the Earl to be kind to you in marriage. You weren’t sure how that was going, seeing as his eyes still raked over you at every opportunity, leaving behind an oily feeling that set you on edge.

You were brushing your hair one afternoon when the news came.

The Earl was dead.

Your maid said that he had been found slashed to pieces in his room earlier in the morning, the news spreading life wildfire. You hardly believed the news, but when you looked at the fingers of your left hand, the ugly black band was gone.

You were free.

You sobbed in relief, setting down your hairbrush and burying your head in your hands. Your entire life, you had been promised to someone that you didn’t love. Love hadn’t ever been an option, but now it was. You could choose who to marry, find someone that would actually care for you. You felt like the luckiest girl in the world at the moment.

That night you dressed in a black gown, out of respect for your passed fiancé. The low cut, however, was to attract eligible males - Cassian specifically. You could ruin yourself with him and put a stop to any possible arranged marriages that your father might try to make.

From the moment you walked into the throne room, you felt Cassian’s fiery stare heating your skin, hazel eyes molten when you met them. He approached you immediately, taking your glove covered hand and kissing the back of it.

“I’m sorry to hear about your betrothed,” he said gently, though by the way he was looking appreciatively at your chest, he didn’t mind about the Earl’s unexpected passing.

“Thank you, my lord. It’s quite a shame,” you said with a coy smile.

“Would you care for a dance? In honor of the male who can no longer dance with you, of course,” Cassian said, a grin on his lips. You nodded and allowed him to lead you to the dance floor, and were immediately swept into a waltz.

He was a fantastic dancer, and his wings blocked out enough of the room that you felt like you were the only two in the world, your eyes locked onto his. He led you through the dance without missing a single step, a far cry from the Earl’s lackluster dancing skills. When the dance ended, Cassian led you back to the table you’d sat at with him before, pushing your chair in for you. Once he had settled into the chair next to you, he spoke.

“I know this might be sudden, but I would like for you to marry me.” You blinked at him in surprise, opening your mouth to respond, but he cut you off. “I’ve been watching you closely, and I believe that we would be a perfect match. You’re far too good for this place,” he said, gesturing to the revel. “And by marrying me, you would become a citizen of Velaris. I will afford you any liberties that you want, expect for indulging in the pleasure of others.”

Cassian watched you closely as you struggled to find the words you wanted to say. “It’s a very… kind offer, my lord-”

“Cassian. Call me Cassian.” His grin sent your heart fluttering, and you nodded.

“It’s a kind offer, Cassian, but I am just now free of an engagement for the first time in my life, and, well… I’m not quite ready to make that commitment.”

“Oh? So why have I overheard every eligible male in this room talking about securing your hand in marriage next?”

Really? The thought sent a chill through you. Your father would pounce on any opportunity to gain power in the city, including marrying you off to the highest bidder. “I- I hadn’t realized,” you said quietly.

“I promise to never hurt you, Y/N. I will be a devoted husband for the rest of our days, if you choose to trust me now.”

You bit your lip, considering your options. Either agree to marry Cassian and have some sort of freedom and control over your life, or wait for your father to trap you in another betrothal to a possibly despicable male. “I suppose… I agree, so long as we have a month long courting. I’d like to know the male that I am tying myself to for the rest of my life.”

Cassian beamed at you, happiness shining in those hazel eyes. “I accept your conditions, sweetheart. Now, give me your hand,” he said. He held your offered hand with such gentleness, and slid a diamond engagement ring onto your marriage finger. “This courting business you speak of… Can it include me taking me to your rooms and ravishing you?”

Heat rushed to your face at his question. “I suppose it could… Though I’d like to dance a bit more first.”

“I would be honored to dance with you again, sweetheart,” Cassian said with a grin, already standing and tugging you along with him. “Anything to earn your love.”

❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️

🧡🤍🧡🤍🧡

“Good evening, my dear,” your mate, Xander, said as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

You let out a soft giggle, grasping his hands with your own. “Evening, love. Dinner is almost ready.”

“And it smells divine, just like you.” His nose met your neck and you practically melted into him, dinner forgotten until a carrot popped particularly viciously.

You managed to keep your hands off of him long enough to eat dinner, but once the plates were cleared you dragged him into bed. Your bond was still fresh, as it had only been a month since you had accepted it. Everything was exciting, the levels of passion you could reach unrivaled by your past lovers, and you were awed by how much Xander already cared for you.

The night flew past, and in the morning you dressed for the new High Lord’s coronation. Xander was a member of the court, allowing you to witness the grand event that you otherwise would have only heard about. You were excited for this new chapter in Autumn’s history, having heard wonderful things about the High Lord already. He had immediately enforced a new law, outlawing arranged marriages outright - something that you had always found abhorrent. Marriage should be for love, and no other reason, in your opinion.

The dress you wore was brand new, with off the shoulder sleeves and made of a gorgeous dark red velvet material, and you felt absolutely stunning in it. The matching cape that tied around your neck covered your cleavage completely, making it appropriate for the ceremony.

“You looked wonderful, mate,” Xander said, pulling you into his arms. “I’m tempted to skip the coronation altogether and keep you here.”

You couldn’t help the blush that spread over your cheeks. “As much as I would enjoy that, we need to support our High Lord. Come, let’s get going.”

The carriage ride there was filled with heated kisses and Xander’s wandering hands, though you managed to emerge looking just as put together as when you had left the house.

The Forest House was just as beautiful as it had been described, and Xander led you through the halls with ease. The throne room was large enough to fit the entire court with room to breathe, and the throne itself took your breath away. It was made from the very tree that had been hollowed out to fit the room, rising from the ground and carved with woodland creatures and plants native to Autumn. The wood gleamed in the light, appearing to shimmer with power, even without the High Lord seated in it.

You took your seats, waiting patiently for the ceremony to start. Xander’s arm wrapped around your shoulders, holding you close to himself.

A priestess walked to the front of the room, raising her hands above her head in a call for silence. A hush fell over the room, soon followed by a handsome male making his way to her, dressed in traditional, scarlet robes. His auburn hair gleamed under the light, power radiating off of him and reaching you from across the room.

This was your High Lord.

You could hardly pay attention to the priestess when his eyes met your own, a sudden tug in your chest nearly pulling you from your chair. A shining, golden bond sprung to life in you, and you just barely saw a hint of surprise within your High Lord’s amber eyes.

The feeling was so similar to how you had felt when the mating bond snapped with Xander, but was far stronger. You ached to reach out to the male, but held yourself in place. How could you possibly have two mating bonds?

The priestess’s words flowed in one ear and out the other as you stared at your possible mate. Nothing was making sense anymore. How could you be mated to him? He was so powerful, so attractive and you were just… You. With barely any magic, you didn’t deserve him.

And you already had a mate - a perfect, sweet male, who was sitting right next to you and had his arm wrapped around you.

Your head ached by the time the ceremony was over, and all you wanted to do was go home and take a nap. But if you suggested going home straight away, Xander would suspect something, and that was the last thing that you wanted. Surely the feeling you had and the tether within your chest was a mistake, and you were just feeling nervous about being at court for the first time.

You were so wrapped up in your thoughts that you didn’t see your High Lord approach, your gaze fixed on your hands in your lap. “Good afternoon,” he said, his voice low and deep.

Your eyes shot up, meeting amber and sending your heart into overdrive. He was even more handsome up close, if that was possible. There was already a possessiveness in his eyes that had your cheeks burning, and if there was any doubt that he had felt the same tug as you had, it was gone with his next words. “I’d like to speak with my mate, Lord Xander,” he said with authority.

“Your mate, High Lord? Y/N is my mate,” Xander said, wrapping his arm around you more tightly.

Eris only blinked at him once before responding, “The bond snapped during the ceremony, I assure you. Y/N, come with me for a moment.”

You glanced nervously between Xander and Eris, unsure of what to do. But if your High Lord demanded something of you…

“I’ll be back in a bit, my love,” you said softly, standing and taking Eris’s offered hand. Xander glowered as the two of you walked away, ire in his eyes when you risked a glance back at him. Once you were out of the main room and into a side chamber, you spoke again. “I’m truly not sure how this is possible, but I am mated to Xander already.”

Eris considered his words carefully. “While I do not doubt that the bond between you feels real, there is magic that allows for the forging of a false bond. Tell me, how did our bond snapping feel compared to your bond with Xander?”

You bit your lip before responding, “Stronger… The bond feels more solid between us, somehow.”

Eris nodded his head. “And you’ve accepted your bond with him already?” You nodded. “Then I would wager that your ‘mate’ used ancient magic to forge a bond between your souls. The moment you accept our bond, the false bond will be shattered.”

Tears filled your eyes at the idea of Xander tricking you. He was the male that you trusted most and loved so dearly, and had falsified your connection, and for what?

“I- I need to speak with Xander. Surely this isn’t true, it’s all some sort of mistake…”

Eris frowned at you, shaking his head. “I won’t have you be alone with him, he could hurt you. We can go together and find him, then you may speak with him.”

Your eyes narrowed at the suggestion. “Xander would not hurt me, he loves me.”

“He loves you enough to forge a fake mating bond. That’s the kind of love that can end up hurting someone. Now, let’s find him.” Eris offered his hand to you again, and after a moment’s hesitation you took it. He led you back out into the throne room and back to the table you had been sitting at with Xander, though he was nowhere to be found. Eris stepped away from you to ask another courtier where your mate had run off to, then held your hand once more.

The pair of you left the throne room once more, and Eris guided you into a sitting room off of the main hallway of the Forest House. In front of the fire, Xander sat in an armchair, swirling a glass of whiskey in his hand.

“So, Xander,” Eris started, “Care to explain how the lovely Y/N has two mating bonds? Lie and you will be punished greatly.”

Xander’s brown eyes looked between you and Eris, then down at your still-clasped hands. He let out a sigh, then drained the rest of his drink. “I loved you from the moment I set eyes on you, Y/N. I didn’t mean- I never wanted to lie to you.”

“Xander,” you pled, “Just tell me the truth. Did you use magic to make the bond between us?”

“Yes,” he sighed.

Your heart shattered at the admission, your reality finally crumbling around you. “How- How could you do such a thing?! I trusted you, I trusted that our mating bond was real, and you’ve been lying to me this entire time?!”

“Y/N, I am so sorry. But the love that you feel for me, that’s real. Don’t you want to stay with me? I promise that I will never lie to you-”

You shook your head. “No. No. I can’t even look at you anymore. Don’t you dare come near me, ever again,” you said tearily, turning around and storming out of the room. Your entire life for the last three months since the bond had snapped had just come down around you, and you could barely breathe. You pushed into the nearest restroom, tears streaming down your cheeks.

You collapsed onto the small sofa in the room, your head in your hands. You’d only noticed Xander once the bond had snapped, and you had trusted that it was true, that you were meant for each other. And now…

A knock sounded on the door.

“Y/N?” Eris asked through the thick wood, his voice muffled. “Y/N, can we talk?” You didn’t respond. “Don’t make me barge in there. I will if I have to, but-”

You opened the door with a sigh, allowing Eris to come inside of the room. He immediately sat down next to you, taking your hands in his.

“I am so sorry that this happened to you, little flame. I do want you to know that I expect nothing from you, and I would like to provide for you, no matter if you accept the bond or not.”

You nodded slowly. “I can’t, not now…”

“That is understandable,” Eris said, giving your hands a gentle squeeze. “Let me give you a room here, in the Forest House, for the foreseeable future. I can arrange to have your things brought here for you, and I would be honored to provide for you for as long as you will allow. And if you feel like getting to know me, so be it. What do you say?”

“I suppose… that would be fine. As for my things… I have nothing in that house that I want.” Every item you had was either bought by or reminded you of Xander, and you wanted to leave him and his betrayal in the past. “You can court me, as well,” you added as an afterthought.

After all, your true mate was right beside you, offering comfort and shelter with no expectations of reciprocation from you. Why shouldn’t you give him a chance?

Eris smiled, making his face light up in a way that you hadn’t seen yet. “I would be honored to court you, Y/N. Come, I’ll give you a tour while your rooms are being readied.” He extended a hand to you after standing, and you took it readily, using the back of your other hand to wipe the remaining tears from your cheeks.

“That sounds lovely, Eris.” You let him lead you from the wash room and into the next chapter of your life, hopefully one without any deception.

🧡🤍🧡🤍🧡

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤

You bobbed your head to the music as you sipped your drink, only half-listening to your friends’ conversation around you. You’d been sitting in your anticipation for days, waiting for him to return from whatever journey he had been sent on. Of course, you had no true idea of when he would return to the City of Rivers, but you couldn’t help yourself - he was too addictive.

Your friends had obviously noticed your energy, shaking their heads whenever your head whipped to the entrance each time the door opened, hoping that he would be the one walking through. You bounced your leg, hoping to get some of your energy out.

The night dragged on, and you were on your second drink when the door opened wide, your head snapping to look at who had come through. The hulking frame and onyx hair had your heart racing, and the moment his eyes met yours you drained the rest of your drink and began to slide out of your seat.

“Hey,” Evaline said, her hand gripping your arm tightly. “Be careful with him. He’s only going to hurt you,” she warned, her brown eyes looking at you with pity.

“Oh, Ev,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “I’ll be fine, he’s been perfectly nice to me.”

She shrugged and loosened her grip enough for you to tug your arm away. “Just remember that I warned you.”

“Have a good night,” you said quickly before making your way across the crowded bar, right up to his side. “Hi.”

“Hello,” Lorcan said with a slight smile, softening the plains of his face. “Are you ready?”

You nodded enthusiastically. “More than.”

The two of you left the bar, walking back to your place that was only a couple of blocks away, your usual meeting place. His rooms were in the palace, and you’d never been in them before as Lorcan preferred to stay away from them when he could.

For half a year, you’d been entangled with him, seeing him whenever he returned to the city. And for half a year, you’d fought back your very real feelings, afraid of scaring him away if you were to confess. Lorcan wasn’t one for emotional talk, let alone the confession of feelings, and so you had tucked them away as deeply as you could. Still, they were there, lingering beneath the surface and threatening to bubble over each time you saw him.

Your home was warm when you came through the front door, a nice change from the chill that autumn had brought with it. Lorcan wrapped his arms around your middle from behind, his nose finding the crook of your neck.

“I missed you,” you sighed, your hands finding his and squeezing gently.

“Mm,” he hummed, tongue darting out against your skin and making you shiver. “Enough to show me your bedroom?”

You let out a soft laugh, leaning back into his touch. “Always.” Without warning, he scooped you into his arms, making his way to your bedroom. He set you on your bed gently, onyx eyes looking down at you hungrily. Your heart raced at the look, knowing what was to come.

He would undress you carefully, like you were a present for him to unwrap, then lower his mouth to your core. Only once you’d came would he enter you, bringing you more pleasure while taking his own. It was a dance you knew well at this point, the one you did every time you were with him.

And it never got old.

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤

“I can stay for a few days, this time,” Lorcan said softly, his voice rumbling through his chest. You smiled and tilted your head up from your place on his chest, looking at him with excitement.

“You can?”

“Mm. I thought you might be happy.”

“Very,” you said with a grin. “What’s the occasion?”

“Our queen thinks I need a break, and I won’t complain if I get to see you for longer.”

“Neither will I. Does that mean you’ll let me cook for you?”

Lorcan’s large hand ran across your back soothingly. “Unless we want to starve, yes. You know I enjoy your cooking.”

You did, but it was still nice to hear it sometimes. “Good. We can go to the market in the morning.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Lorcan said, squeezing you against his chest with his arm.

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤

The few days you spent with him were magical, to say the least. It felt like you were actually together, and like he enjoyed being together. It was more than sex now, you were sure of it.

He’d gone with you to the market, carrying your purchases without a complaint, and had even bought a flower from one of the little flower girls, tucking it behind your ear with a gentle hand.

You spent the rest of the time in your home, wrapped up in each other, snuggling and talking about everything and nothing. It was pure bliss, being with him.

Of course, it had come to an end when one of the others from his cadre, Prince Rowan, had come to fetch him from your home. You’d kissed him goodbye, telling him to find you when he was back in town. He’d simply nodded before disappearing into the crowd, off to serve your queen.

It was a month later, now, and a month of missing him always went by slowly. You waited and waited for him to return, hoping that he was safe and well.

You were just returning home when someone called out your name, making you whip your head in their direction, only to see Lorcan bounding towards you.

“Lorcan!” you exclaimed, dropping your groceries and throwing yourself against him. “I missed you so much.”

“I can see that,” he said with a chuckle, running his hands along your spine. You craned your head, pressing your lips to his. You couldn’t help the smile that crossed over your face at the mere sight of him, couldn’t help the joy fizzing in your chest.

“You’re home so soon.”

“It was a short mission, Y/N, and I thought I would come see you first,” he said with a half smile. “Will you let me in?”

“Oh, of course,” you said, blushing as you bent to pick up your things and open the door. “I’m glad you’re back, I’ve been dreadfully bored without you around.”

“I’m sure I can fix that,” Lorcan said lowly, his lips finding your neck in record time. You bit your lip as you forced yourself to move away from him, placing your groceries in the cold box before you forgot about them entirely.

“I’m sure you can,” you said once you were finished. “How long can you stay this time?” Secretly, you hoped that he wouldn’t need to leave again, though you knew that was near impossible.

“I’m not sure… I’ll know later, once I report to Maeve.”

You nodded, heart thumping loudly. He’d come to you first this time. “I hope it’s for a while, I thought of a few things for us to do.”

“Oh?” Lorcan asked with a raised brow. “Like what?”

You bit your lip, fighting the blush that threatened to overtake your face. “I heard of this shop that sells intimate items, it’s only recently opened up.”

“Intimate items, hm? And I suppose you’re more than ready to try a few of them out?” His arms were around you now, his height all the more obvious as he loomed over you. “If I have more than a few days in the city, I don’t see why we couldn’t go.”

You grinned up at him. “I thought you might be interested,” you said with a giggle. “But for now…” You tugged him into your bedroom, your free hand already undoing the laces of your dress.

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤

Lorcan had left at some time in the night, not even waking you to say goodbye. You woke with a frown when you found yourself alone in bed, but chalked it up to him needing to report to your queen sooner rather than later.

You should be happy that he even came to you first, after all.

You went about your day as normal, going to work and looking over your shoulder, hoping that he would appear at any moment and whisk you away.

But it didn’t happen.

All day you waited for him to return, and all day he didn’t. That night, you went to bed alone.

Perhaps Maeve had already sent him out again…

The thought broke your heart, that he wouldn’t so much as say goodbye before leaving the city. But perhaps he hadn’t had a choice, and was sent out without warning…

You sighed as you went about getting ready for the day, doing your routine as usual. Bathe, apply a few cosmetics, eat breakfast, head out the door. By the end of your shift, there was still no sign of Lorcan, and your heart sank even further.

You walked home slowly, not minding the rain pouring down. The cold of it shocked your system awake, bringing an awareness that you hadn’t had before.

Perhaps… Perhaps he didn’t want to say goodbye. Perhaps you were wrong about something being different about him, and that he would never want anything more than sex with you.

The longer you thought about it, the more foolish you felt. He had never changed, it was you. You’d fallen in love with a male that could never love you back, could never truly give himself to you when he already belonged to the queen.

Tears mixed with rain as you entered your home, wretched sobs tearing from you as you slid against the closed door, dropping to the floor.

He would never love you, would he?

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤

The next time Lorcan returned, you couldn’t force a smile on your face. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything. You opened your front door wider, letting him inside.

“It’s nice to see you,” he said, though you felt he was lying. Something was off about him, just as it was with you. When you didn’t say anything, merely stared at him, he said “We need to talk…”

“Are you ending this?” You gestured between the two of you.

Onyx eyes blinked down at you, surprise shining in them for only a moment. “Yes. I can’t… There is no future here, and I don’t want to hurt you any further.”

You nodded, resigned to your fate. “Why? Why start this at all?”

“I…” It looked like he was choking on his words, and you raised a brow. “I’d thought maybe you were different, but you’re not. You’re too attached.”

Too attached? That’s why you were being discarded?

“Well, excuse me for seeing a male that clearly doesn’t exist,” you said, anger bubbling up within you. “I’m sorry that I grew attached to the male that came to me every time he was in town, who seemed to be getting attached as well. But you could never truly be attached to someone, could you? Not with Maeve holding all of your heart in her hand.” You waited for him to respond, for him to say something. When he didn’t, you sighed. “You can leave now. No need to associate yourself with someone so attached.”

He looked as if he wanted to say something, but couldn’t get the words out. He turned to leave, saying the words that you had never heard him utter before. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” Lorcan left your house, walking into the rain outside.

Good. Let him get drenched walking back to that stupid palace, to his stupid queen that would always control his heart.

Your friend had been right. All he had done was built up your feelings for him, then smashed them to pieces.

You started packing that night. You wouldn’t wait around in this city, hoping to catch a glance of him or for him to change his mind. No, you would go somewhere that he would never find you, somewhere that you wouldn’t be haunted by him. Somewhere that you could be free.

🖤🤍🖤🤍🖤