#sirj

The weekend is a good time to explore.

Not because you need to rush into something new.

But because life is usually a little quieter.

Read about something that caught your attention. Ask a question you've been too embarrassed to ask someone. Talk or research about a fantasy instead of judging it.

Curiosity is one of the best teachers you'll ever have.

Once again, your fantasies aren't instructions.

They're clues.

Pay attention to what they say about trust, connection, vulnerability, excitement or surrender.

You might discover that what you're really looking for isn't an activity at all.

-🍀

I'm glad my posts are interesting for you.

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Oooh anonymous ask. I'm glad I'm interesting.

The UK is heading into a heatwave.

So here is your reminder.

Look after yourself properly.

Drink your water.

Eat something sensible.

Get outside when it’s cooler, not when the pavement is melting.

Rest when your body tells you to.

Some of you are very good at caring about everyone else and very bad at applying that same effort to yourself.

And yes, some of you needed reminding because you got distracted and forgot you have a body.

The basics matter.

Water.

Food.

Sleep.

Fresh air.

When those things slip, everything else feels harder.

Your patience drops.

Your emotions feel bigger.

Your thoughts get louder.

Looking after yourself isn’t just physical.

It keeps your mind steady too.

Consider this your accountability check.

Self care isn’t something you earn after everything else is done.

People tell you who they are in small ways.

What they avoid.

When they withdraw.

What they do when they’re overwhelmed.

Pay attention.

"How do I know what I like?"

The honest answer is that most people don't.

At least not at the start.

People often think they need a list of interests, limits and fantasies before they can explore. In reality, most of that is discovered through curiosity, fantasising, reflection and experience.

Pay attention to your fantasies.

Not because they are instructions, but because they are clues.

What themes keep appearing?

Is it serving someone?

Being looked after?

Giving up control or responsibility?

Feeling desired?

Structure?

Attention?

Challenge?

Sometimes what attracts us isn't the activity itself. It's how it makes us feel.

You also don't have to decide everything at once.

Try things slowly.

Read

Ask questions

Observe your reactions

Afterwards, ask yourself:

Did I enjoy that?

Did I feel comfortable?

Would I want to explore it again?

Remember that "I'm not sure" is a perfectly valid answer. You are discovering.

Exploration isn't a test you pass.

It's a process of getting to know yourself a little better.

Thank you for creating a good space!

Oh wow, thank you. That's very kind.

There are a lot of extremes here on tumblr. With plenty leaning into the mysoginist kink, though seemingly more than just a kink lately.

I just try and give some general guidance & experience to my small audience.

So this is your reminder to be a good girl and take care of yourself properly.

Drink your water

Eat something decent

Don’t sit overheating in a dark room scrolling for hours

Open a window

Get some fresh air

Slow down for a bit

You’ll feel better for it, even if you pretend otherwise at first.