Fandom: LADS
Rated: M+
Ships: past relationship with Caleb, eventual Sylus pairing
Tags: Angst, single mom, parenthood, grief, eventual smut, love triangle, canon-typical violence, possession, obsessive behavior, suicidal thoughts, recreational drug use, alcohol, more to be added as story progresses
Summary:
Post explosion, singlemom!MC.
Sophia is learning to live life with the weight of grief and regret. One lapse in judgement led to an unexpected course change and her inability to be vulnerable led to her never telling Caleb the most important secret of all. Years after his death she is still learning to live and grow alongside her daughter who has all the brightness that she thought she lost when her childhood home burned in flames. Now she's trying to reclaim who she once was and uncover what really happened the day of the explosion and unbeknownst to her she was going to run into someone who would forever change her perspective.
Chapters one through four published on Ao3
Chapter one under the cut
Part One: Restructure
Chapter one:Â The New normal
âNoooooo!â Sophia shouted from the top her lungs as she witnessed the burst of debris fall in flames around her. The smoke plumed above her childhood home and blanketed the area in tandem with all the regrets that were held in her throat.Â
Her heart pounded heavily in her ears, the thudding fluttering like a rabbitâs. The realization of what was just lost settled along the dark tunnel of her skewed her vision. In the distance a wailing started to draw closer that wasnât her own, a mixture of familiar cries and the high pitch of an emergency vehicle.Â
She woke up.Â
The wailing remained from the nightmare as it settled uncomfortably on her stomach. It was an anxiety that had proven over and over again no time would relieve. Sophia saw a pair of teary amethysts hover over her expectantly, confirming that the wailing was not the only thing that was real. Sometimes when she woke, she could still smell the ashes in her nostrils.
âBaby, whatâs wrong?â She cooed, her fingers combing the solid black waves of hair that draped around the rounded toddlerâs face. Sophia saw that there was still an hour before they both had to be up to start their day but it turned out, Melody had other plans.Â
âThirsty.â A muffled cried responded after sniffles, snot, and tears were wiped on her lovingly.Â
âOkay, okay, come on.â Sophia grasped the under arms of her small child and lifted her to her chest to calm her. The weight of Melodyâs body was a comforting relief from everything that was just outside this room. Habitually Sophia combed her free hand in Melodyâs hair to soothe her while she carried them both to the kitchen. The pads of her feet making soft thumps as the cool hardwood floors sent goosebumps up the skin of her legs.Â
The kitchen appeared cluttered but the special kind that resembled their busy day to day. It was full of dirty and clean sippy cups strewn about, crumbs and half eaten foods from experimenting with a toddlerâs tastebuds, and random objects filling the remaining spaces on the counters and dining table.Â
Sophia still felt groggy but she was able to get through the mess with her eyes closed. She put Melody on the counter and handed her a half-eaten fruit grain bar while she quickly washed a cup. In the mornings she always gave her daughter milk with toddler formula to ensure she still obtained the proper nutrients with how picky of an eater the small child had become. It wasnât hard to occupy a toddler with snack food however and it gave Sophia the extra minute she needed to also set up her own morning juice, the darkest roast possible.Â
âThirsty!â The high pitch voice demanded. Melody was starting to throw her hands and feet about and Sophia kept an eye on her in case she threw herself off the counter.Â
âAlmost done, patience kid.â Sophia assures as she whisks the powder into the milk at lighting speed. She starts to feel around the counter for the top she had clean and finally caves in to turn on the stove light. The brightness stings her eyes for a moment, forcing herself to wake up even more, but it aided in finding the lid that somehow ended up down the other end of the counter. Melody reaches out to grab the cup as Sophia tightens the lid and instead of scolding her, she lifted her off the counter and placed her on her feet on the floor. Without having to say a word Melody ran off with her cup, clearly satisfied with the results and giving Sophia the extra breathing room she needed to fully prepare for the day.Â
Sophiaâs green eyes lingered onto the calendar that hung on the refrigerator and the same pit feeling she woke up with returned in the silence. Melodyâs birthday was only a month away and Sophia finally was returning to the Hunterâs Association as of today. She still needed the final okay from her doctor but judging by the past yearâs health improvements Sophia did not see a reason why Dr. Zayne would not sign off.Â
Her breath caught in the back of her throat when her mind returned to seeing those teary amethyst eyes. Those eyes she adored and felt forlorn to gaze upon some days. They are a lingering memory and regret wrapped neatly into a future with endless possibilities, none of them being the one her heart had desired the most. Sophia shook herself out of her mind and took another large sip of her black coffee. It sent a shiver down her spine and the chills from it helped awaken herself out of her dreary dreamlike state that hung around her head.Â
âMelody!â Sophia called out curious where her daughter was in their small apartment. She didnât have many choices but still the 2-foot-tall child could hide very well when she wanted. It didnât take long till she heard thumping down the hall and saw the bright-eyed child smiling, proud of herself.Â
âDo you want to watch cartoons while Mommy takes a shower?â Sophia asked even though she already knew the answer. She figured always asking before doing things was a great way to teach her daughter early lessons in consent and in communication. Melody nodded with excitement and ran out into their living room before Sophia could ask a follow up. Â
âThe kitty cat one?â She had the remote in her hand, coffee in the other, and was already queuing up the television.Â
âMR. ALLEY CAT!â Melody sung with fervor as she clapped her hands and started the cartoonâs dance.Â
Sophia glanced at the time that was in the corner of the television and figured she had forty-five minutes before Ms. Jefferson came downstairs to sit with Melody for the day. It was a perk for talking with the neighbors at the mailbox room in the lobby that she was able to find someone as sweet and eager as Ms. Jefferson. The elder woman was always more than willing, and it was hard for Sophia to get her to accept any cash. On top of that Ms. Jefferson had a habit of cooking them all dinner when a side gig held Sophia up longer than planned.
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Fandom: Love and Deepspace
Rated: M
Chapter 5: Everything is Temporary
Chapter 5 is out now! I will cycle working on this and my Empire of Desire fic!
Preview under the cut, chapters 1 -5 available on AO3
 The training area was empty. Itâs vast hall echoing every action Sophia took as she entered with relief. The emptiness gave her the free reign to be more aggressive towards the training equipment. She always felt when she had eyes on her during training it was harder to get into it as harsh as she needed to blow off the steam that had built up. Her small stature was always in question when it came to physical exercises but she knew that she packed a punch when she needed.
The hanging punching bag swung with ferocity with every impact with Sophiaâs fists. Her mind slowly unraveled into an emptiness. Her controlled breathes and side steps to avoid the weight of the bagâs swing helped bring herself into a meditative state. The tension in her muscles melted away with the building burn that settled in from her continuous push. Her earbuds held tight while the vibrations of loud rapid chords encouraged the aggressive speed and force the bag had to take from her.