#simonochrome

Meme: Send a symbol for a text | Accepting

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text

[TEXT]: I don’t wish to give you cause for alarm, but he’s been found!

[TEXT]: The police department set up borders within a ten-mile radius of the city and apprehended him at a checkpoint!

[TEXT]: I need you to prepare a solid case in time for tomorrow’s hearing, Blackquill

meme || accepting

Attractiveness:

repulsive || hideous || ugly || not attractive || unappealing || not unattractive || meh || no preference || ok || mildly attractive || nice looking || cute || adorable || attractive || pleasant on the eyes || good looking || hot || sexy || beautiful || gorgeous || hot damn || would tap that || perfect || godlike || holy fuck there are no words

   What an intimidating looking man.    Then again, Vera found most people    to be this way. This man, though, was    very intimidating. However, Vera did not    run away, or cry, or anything like that.    She did shake slightly, though, despite    trying her best to not be scared. Her    eyes stared down at the floor, as well,    as she began to nervously pick at her    nails out of habit.

Meme: Send me 💬 and my muse will describe yours in three words | Accepting

↪ Internet browsing activities

Pornhub.

Nah jks he has Miles for that. Mainly he uses the internet for research and emails, actually. As in work. (He does that.)

Occasionally he will Youtube silly things.

♟ If they like board games, and how good they are at ‘em

DO NOT PLAY BOARD GAMES WITH THIS MAN.

His luck is uncanny. Games of chance are meaningless when one has uncanny luck and can bluff like nothing else. Cluedo is a particularly bad culprit-- Miles doesn’t like it because it’s guesswork, but Phoenix loves Cluedo because he can figure out the combination within 6 rounds maximum, even in Super Cluedo with more people and items. DOn’t let this man con you into playing games with him he will WIN and you will cry. 

So yeah he likes board games a lot.

He is also good at chess, for that matter, but aside from one time he can’t beat Miles. (But besides one time Miles can’t beat him at poker so they’re even.)

♆ The worst kind of neighbor they could have, and how they deal with them

The nosy, stuck-up, -phobic kind. The kind who’d whisper about how he looks like a bum and is a drunk degenerate and his daughter plays in bars and he’s a filthy fag etc etc etc. That kind.

And Phoenix would just...scare them out? Deliberately have embarrassingly loud sex, or imply he’s doing that despite Miles being in Munich, leave lacy thongs hanging out on his balcony, explode glitter in the hallways, talk loudly and unashamedly about how in love he is, just generally make them uncomfortable and pissed off but just enough that their complaints sound petty and asshole-ish. 

☺ What their welcome (or not-so-welcome) mat would say

Well if he had that neighbour something very gay.