#shift-shaping

Aw, thank you!

The couple is Bethyl (Beth and Daryl) from The Walking Dead. They are really only the second ship I've ever TRULY loved (the first being Solavellan of course, which is currently consuming my entire soul, once again. Is it 2016??).

I don't have a Twitter so I can't respond there, but I found it really interesting that the way you recommend dealing with TERFs (do not engage, do not try to convince them you're a person, just block them and move on) is also how I've seen anti-fascist experts recommend you deal with fascists/incels/alt-right dweebs on the internet. The similarities between TERF behavior and online fascist behavior is something I find fascinating. You deal with a TERF on Tumblr the same way you deal with an Incel on Reddit because both are predators fueled by hate looking for an easy target. Both groups demand the scapegoating of a more vulnerable group as a cost of membership.

I'd love to know if you have any thoughts on this, and if so, I'd love to read them. Treating TERFs as the indefensible bigots they are seems to be an effective tactic, and I think there's value in insisting on labeling them as extremists. However, I don't know if there's been any research on TERFs like there has on incels and the alt-right. It seems like a deep rabbit hole to go down.

I'm glad you found the threads interesting!

I tend to apply my academic upbringing (philosophy, theology and literature) to most things I talk about, because that's just how I experience the world, but I don't do gender nearly as strictly as I do, say, media analysis/historical revisionism critique, because all my gender/race insights are more from a lived perspective than a "studied/research" perspective.

My thing with TERFs and other extremist/radical niche groups is that I've sort of reached the conclusion they're essentially disconnected micro cells of high control groups, and so I tend to apply moderation methods surrounding high control groups to them. Their message itself is the harmful thing, so minimizing exposure to it is the best way of dealing with it, in my experience. There's value in challenging their ideas when they start showing in people you personally know and have a connection to, because a lot of times, a radicalization pipeline gets derailed because someone close to them pushes back and that sort of jolts people awake, so to speak.

The good news is that there is in fact plenty of ink spilled over the years, regarding TERFs. Third wave feminism does contend a lot with the burn-everything-to-the-ground insights of your average second wave radical feminist, and the clout-chasing idiots who pretend to be that for the sake of internet brownie points and the chance to shit on trans people. The thing about TERFs is that they tend to parrot the talking points but not really talk in nuance about their framework because the framework is rotten and it doesn't really take long for a thinking person to start poking holes in it.

Some resources, top of my head, that I've found incredibly useful in navigating TERFs from a less lived perspective and a more academic one:

The Clayman Conversations about the TERF Industrial Complex.

TERF wars: An Introduction.

Terfism is White Distraction: On BLM, Decolonising the Curriculum, Anti-Gender Attacks and Feminist Transphobia.

Decolonizing Trans/Gender Studies: Teaching Gender, Race and Sexuality in Times of the Rise of the Global Right.

I found the quotes and bibliography of these to be a decent starting point to start digging into the WTFery of TERFs.

Another source I recommend a lot as a starting point is The Alt-Right Playbook video series by Innuendo Studios. The entire series is absolutely amazing at neatly breaking down and explaining exactly how alt-right tactics work, how to recognize them, and in some cases how to not engage with them. It was one of the first things that made me sort of zero in on the wide similarities between seemingly disperse/ideologically opposed groups, because they're all pulling from the reactionary, radicalized playbook and I think it's useful to know how to spot it.

If you can't stomach the whole series, and it's a lot, so that's fair, the one I 100% wish was required viewing before joining any kind of social media or online community is this one:

Please enjoy....she

SHE!!!!

@shift-shaping sent: "You're very tall for an elf. You're taller than me, and I'm tall for an elf. Were all the elves in your village tall?"

𝙽𝙾. 𝙾𝙵 𝚂𝙿𝙾𝙺𝙴𝙽 𝙻𝙰𝙽𝙶𝚄𝙰𝙶𝙴𝚂: four-ish? (common, elvhen, some orlesian, specks of tevene)

𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙾𝙵 𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴: high / average / deep.

𝙰𝙲𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃: yes (marcher + hint of dalish (welch?) / no.

𝙳𝙴𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚁: confident / shy / approachable / hostile / other.

𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴: slumped / straight / stiff / relaxed.

𝙷𝙰𝙱𝙸𝚃𝚂: head tilting / swaying / fidgeting / stuttering / gesturing / arm crossing / strokes chin / er , um , or other interjections / plays with hair or clothing / hands at hips / inconsistent eye contact / maintains eye contact / frequent pausing / stands close / stands at distance.

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐓𝐘

𝚅𝙾𝙲𝙰𝙱𝚄𝙻𝙰𝚁𝚈: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️

𝙴𝙼𝙾𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛

𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝚁𝚄𝙲𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴: ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️ ⬜️ ⬜️

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘.

𝙵𝚁𝙴𝚀𝚄𝙴𝙽𝙲𝚈: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️

𝙲𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙸𝚅𝙸𝚃𝚈: ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️ ⬜️ ⬜️

𝐁𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐘.

arse. ass. asshole. bastard. bitch. bloody. bugger. bollocks. chicken shit. crap. cunt. dick. frick. fuck. horseshit. motherfucker. piss. prick. screw. shit. shitass. son of a bitch. twat. wanker. pussy.

𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐍 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓.

christ on a bike. christ on a cracker. damn. goddamn. godsdamn. hell. holy shit.jesus. jesus christ. jesus h christ. jesus h. roosevelt christ. lord have mercy. jesus , mary and joseph. sweet jesus. creators. mythal help us. fen'harel ma halam.

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓

straightforward or cryptic? | finding the right word or using the first word that comes to mind? | masculinity , neutrality, or femininity? | formalities or abrasiveness? | praise or equivocation? | frankness or lies? | excessive or minimal hand gestures? | name – calling or magnanimity? | friendly or blunt?

𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒.

𝙳𝙾 𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝙰 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙳 𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙴 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙾𝚁 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁’𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙰𝙲𝚁𝙾𝚂𝚂 𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙻𝚈 𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙸𝙽𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙰𝚃𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ‘𝚆𝙷𝙾𝙼’ 𝙸𝙽 𝙰 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴? yes / no / yes, but it’s always wrong

𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚆𝙰𝙽𝚃𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙰 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃. 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 𝙳𝙾 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚄𝚂𝙴? but / though / although / however / perhaps / mayhaps / maybe / yet

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? walk away / ask if that’s everything / say that’s everything / give a proper goodbye / tell their company they’re done here / remain quiet / they don’t.

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙰𝙳𝙳𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂? titles / first names / surnames / full names / nicknames.

𝙸𝙽 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙰𝚈 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙾𝚄𝚃 𝚃𝙾 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂? accent / vocabulary / tone / level / politeness / brusqueness / it doesn’t.

tagged by: ​my beloved @shift-shaping 😘

😁 This one, from @solas-an.

Okay, I’ve done most of the marriage events for the guys bar I think just Doug? But it’s a toss up between Leon and Arthur for my faves from the guys.