#shar.lott

Every Winter I show up to you like Christmas pass

Staring at you as if you gave me life

Illumination surrounds you and I feel safe in your presence

I'd give anything to spend everyday with you

If I had one wish, that is what I'd wish for

I can only imagine what it would be like to wake up everyday and know that you are only seconds away from me.

I think about you all the time, even now as we stand here

We search each other with our eyes because our minds are to busy trying to comprehend the moment to even speak

I open my arms and you embrace me

And all of a sudden

I feel alive again

Late night

Laying in bed

Staring at the wall

Seeing face's of you.

The passion I have for you is like fire

Purifying but dangerous

The craving I have for you is an addiction

And wanting more of you could end me

I could fall to my knees and beg for you if you denied me

I numbed myself for you just so I could be in your presence.

Everything around me is unclear but I can see you clearly

Your face is like a dream to me

When I close my eyes I see you.

When you finally finish re-twisting your hair for the first time and you feel just like.....

Excited, happy, relief, tired, accomplished, full of life, new beginning, fresh, sexy, confident, liberated, free, like im just amazing and I can take on any challenge that comes my way!!

It's a feeling I can not wait to feel every month! I'm happy with my choice to start locking my hair.

Have you ever just missed yourself ?

Wandering on abandon roads and fighting with closed doors that seemed to be bolted shut somehow led me to you. Buried in all my guilt and shame from my past I found redemption. I stand tall with, my chest high as I stand in front of you. Gazing at you in amazement. You never left me. You were at my side the whole time as I searched like a blind person trying to find you. I know you saw me cry. I know you saw me fall. I know you had to keep your distance. I understand it now. This journey was not for you. This journey was for me. My strength came through my struggles, it came once you let me go. Before I came to this conclusion I felt so broke but now I never felt so whole. In amazement, I stare at you, happier than I ever been. Finally, I found you. If God could live again, He would live inside you. Sharmoneke. Finally. I found you.

To you she's reckless but to her she is everything that she wanted to be.

Breath in this moment because when the sun come up she'll be gone.

So I have been wanting to post my daily thoughts but I haven't because I am forgetful at times. I also have some poems I want to post but haven't. I have been Trying not to go to that place for the past few months. I have been trying to keep my mind in a positive place and not have my anxiety come over me too often. My anxiety helps me in my writing but it kind of makes it hard for me to get over my past if I'm not in control of it.