#shallowkit

“Kits, little darling kits…” Brightsway sang sleepily. She hardly allowed herself a wink, afraid she would miss something important, but at last she had drifted away. 

“Where’s Shallowkit?” Furzerose’s mew woke her with a start. 

“Right here!” Brightsway told her as if the answer was obvious, beaming with a smile, but when she looked down at the three little bundles of joy, she saw that there were only two little bundles.

She jolted to her feet, almost knocking the napping kits over if they had been any closer. She looked around in a panic. “He was just here!” She wailed. “I was watching him, I promise.”

Furzerose’s eyes sparked with fear. She leaned and touched her chin lightly to Brightsway’s head. “I know, honey,” she responded, panic taught in her voice. “He can’t have gone far.”

It was only a few heartbeats. A few, agonizing heartbeats that burst little sharp pieces in Brightsway’s chest, so strong and overwhelming that she nearly vomited onto the curled-over ferns….The ferns….There! 

Relief washed over Brightsway. 

Little Shallowkit was wobbling around, hidden behind the leaves. She wasted no time in grabbing him by the scruff. So relieved and wanting to get him back to the others as soon as possible, she raised him quickly and spun around, racing to the nest.

“Brightsway, stop!” Furzerose’s yowl made her freeze in her tracks. Her mate’s eyes were wide in horror. 

“What?” She asked, already shaking.

“He’s not…Is he breathing?”

Brightsway set their son down as quickly but cautiously as she could. She stared at his still form, throat tightening–

“What’s happening?” Sparktail asked. She and Doesong emerged from the undergrowth that kept their home hidden, Myrtlewing following behind–thank StarClan!--or, thank whoever that Myrtlewing was meant to give the kits a check-up today.

“He’s not breathing!” Brightsway cried. “I didn’t–I don’t think–Did I hurt him?” Her voice cracked. Did she hurt her son?

“Give me room,” Myrtlewing nudged the mothers away. He settled onto his stomach and inspected the kit, holding him with a paw. Immediately, he began compressions, pumping a paw expertly on the little one’s chest…he seemed so small…Was Myrtlewing hurting him? Brightsway expected his paw, so massive compared to the kit, to crush through his tiny ribs.

Forever seemed to pass, fur growing white and whiskers so stuff that they fell off.

Then…“He’s breathing,” he said, breaking the silence, and all four let out a breath they had each been holding. “Did you shake him?” he asked.

Brightsway wanted to sink into the ground, thinking about how eagerly she had grabbed him–swung him–ran with him in her jaws–She was such an idiot!

“Did you shake him?” he repeated, more firmly.

“I might have…” Brightsway’s voice was small.

Shallowkit coughed, a dribble of phlegm leaving his jaws. Myrtlewing ran his paw carefully along his little spine.

“What are you doing?” Doesong asked, a tremble in her voice. 

“I need to make sure there’s no spinal injury,” he told her.

Spinal injury? I’m a monster! A terrible mother! 

When Myrtlewing had finished, he turned Shallowkit’s head to one side. “His spine is intact, and it doesn’t look like he hit his head,” he observed aloud. 

Sparktail couldn’t stop the whimper that escaped her lips. She curled tightly around the two other kits, holding them close.

Shallowkit began wailing, cries splitting the air.

“That’s a good thing, right?” Doesong asked hopefully.

Myrtlewing’s gaze remained focused on the kit. “Not necessarily,” he answered. 

Doesong’s tail drooped.

Myrtlwing gently–as gently as Doesong had ever seen him–opened Shallowkit’s eyes with a steady toe.

“What are you doing now?” Furzerose looked over his shoulder.

“There’s no bleeding in the eyes,” was his response.

Brightsway squeaked. “Bleeding in the eyes?”

After what felt like an eternity, Myrtlewing rose into a seated position. He eyed the kit for a few more moments before Brightsway couldn’t stand the silence anymore. “Is he okay?”

“It’s hard to say.”

“Why?” Sparktail demanded.

“Because kits who are shaken suffer the most damage to the inside of their heads. I can only see so much.”

“What do we do?” Brightsway gasped.

“Support his airways and keep them clear as much as you can.” He looked over his shoulder, in the direction of his home, far from eye-sight. “I’ll tell my family that I’ll be staying around here for a while to keep an eye on him. And I’m sure Alderstar would want to do the same,” he added. Of course. Alderstar was the donor. 

“Is there anything else we can do to help him? Anything at all?” Doesong wanted to be sure.

“I’ll have to discuss medications with Fleathistle,” he responded. “Other than that, if he seems to get worse at all, we may need to consider internal treatment.”

“What’s that?” Furzerose could hardly keep herself together enough to ask.

“I’ll need to fix him on the inside,” Myrtlewing responded. “I’ll have to open him up.”

“You will not!” Sparktail snarled, showing her fangs. “Don’t you dare!”

“Only if it is necessary,” Myrtlewing replied, undeterred. 

“Have you done that before?” Brightsway asked. Tears stained her cheeks.

“Not on a kit,” Myrtlewing answered. “But yes, I have done it plenty of times in the past. Cats here are less susceptible to brutal injuries unless in the living world. I’m sure many of you remember those games of Hide-and-Seek.”

Doesong flattened her ears, face screwed up in distress, thinking of organs…her little one’s organs…

Myrtlewing decided not to tell them that he would most likely need to check Shallowkit’s head, an area that, unlike most of the other organs, was especially sensitive. “One final thing,” he spoke up. “Shallowkit has a high chance of surviving, but there’s also a high chance that certain effects will follow him.”

“For how long?” Furzerose whispered.

“Forever.” 

Myrtlewing turned to leave, telling them that he would return soon after talking with Fleathistle, and then left. 

The mothers could only stand incredibly still…then Shallowkit began to cry, soon joined by the others, who Sparktail began licking urgently.

Carefully, as carefully as she possibly could and with the slowness of a sleeping snail, Doesong picked up Shallowkit and carried him to his siblings. All she-cats curled tightly around them, except for Brightsway, who still hadn’t moved from her spot.

=================

--This is how I imagined the scene looked. Myrtle of course being Sarabi.

--In which Brightsway's idiocy truly hurts someone....Or maybe this would have happened to anyone, but surely Brightsway wouldn't think the same thing.

--He wobbled so far because, while still very young and small, the kits are in the 'crawl and explore' stage. He wasn't extremely far, but it was far enough for Bright to run for a short burst.

--I imagine that Shallowkit (yes, named after Shallowrun) survives! He'll need to be watched for a while, and he MIGHT need the 'cat surgery' thing that Myrtlewing was mentioned before to be an expert in (I'll let you decide that and maybe right a story for it).

--I was inspired to write this because I'm in a Child Development course in Psychology rn and I'm currently reading about things that could harm babies, so I wrote this inbetween studying. It just so happened that Brightsway recently had babies, so boom! Inspo.

--Myrtlewing's seen as a good guy for once (I also wanted to write him being an expert medicine cat).

--It's possible that Myrtlewing knew what to do here, in spite of this being a rare occurrence in Warriors and probably not studied much, because of Marigoldpaw and her litter being so weak and easily hurt.

--Problems that Shallowkit could potentially have include partial or total blindness, developmental delays, learning problems, or behavioural issues, and intellectual disability. Of course, these could all also happen by chance...but Brightsway can never be sure.

--

@elementaldeityoffood

Shallowkit all grown up!

Shallowfig’s chest heaved with panic, his mind whirled as his eyes tried desperately to find movement in the undergrowth around his den. Surely his kits couldn’t have gotten too far? He itched to run after them as soon as possible, but Racemekit was still inside, and he didn’t want to leave him alone. What should he do? Stay with his son or go after his three lost kits?

Making up his mind, he dragged branches of the nearest bushes to block the entrance, then darted away–or planned to, but just as he turned around, he saw his kits stumbling on their little legs toward him. He was more relieved than he had ever been, that was certain, but now what made him freeze was who had accompanied them. A face he had not seen since kithood, yet that had always occupied his brain.

Banshee didn’t say anything, apparently just as surprised to see Shallowfig. 

“Daaad! You ‘twigged the ent-ance!” Tendrilkit complained loudly, breaking the silence. Shallowfig wordlessly moved to pull the branches out of the way. 

“These are your kits?” Banshee asked. It was strange hearing her voice after so long, and so different from how Shallowfig long remembered it. He realized that the same could probably be said for Banshee when he answered. 

“Go inside,” Shallowfig told his kits, shooing them in with his tail. “Yes,” He said to Banshee, turning around to sit.

Banshee shuffled her paws. “They were pretty far from home.”

Shallowfig flattened his ears. Was Banshee accusing him of being a bad father? “They slipped away while I was distracted. I was looking for herbs.”

“Oh. Are you a medicine cat now?”

“No, one of my kits is sick,” Shallowfig replied, glancing sorrowfully at his den.

Banshee’s eyes rounded sympathetically. “Is it….bad?”

“I’ve asked everyone I know who works with the ill. They all say it’s benign, but he’s had–whatever it is that he has since before he opened his eyes.”

Banshee paused for a heartbeat, then padded forward. Shallowfig’s fur rose suspiciously, but he allowed Banshee to get close. She came to a stop beside Shallowfig, pressing her pelt comfortably against his. Shallowfig let out a long, heavy breath. “What does their mother say?”

“Nothing. Gone”

He felt Banshee stiffen against him. “I’m so sorry for your lo–”

“Not dead. We were never as close as mates should be. The kits, blessings as they are, were an accident. We decided to break things off before they were born. She would stay until they were weaned, then I’d take them in.”

“Oh..so you’re raising them by yourself?”

“The family offers help,” Shallowfig replied, feeling the rough aches in his shoulders. He wasn’t sure they would ever fully go away. He doubted it.

“Doesn’t seem like enough.”

“No, then again, kits always sneak out.”

Banshee nodded slowly. “Yeah. I slipped from my mother’s nose more than a few times. Of course, you already knew about that.” She smiled fumbly. 

Shallowfig suspected this would come up, still it caught him off guard and he was unable to think of a reply. 

“I even snuck out a lot more than I was supposed to, really. There wasn’t much of a point to it, though. It wasn’t like who I was running to meet waited for me anymore.”

Shallowfig felt mingled feelings of guilt and irritation. They were kits! Couldn’t Banshee let that go? At the same time, Shallowfig had never truly forgotten their friendship either, or the guilt he had held for abandoning it. 

“Yeah,” he chuckled tensely. “I never did apologize for that, did I?”

“I’m more interested in an explanation,” Banshee admitted, sounding awkward. “I just–want to know.”

“I get that,” Shallowfig responded. “My family found out where I was going. They would have found out sooner, but my nephews and nieces were helping me keep the secret. It was fine until they found out….” he trailed off. How should he tell Banshee about her mother?

“Found out?” Banshee prompted.

“They said that your mother was dangerous. That she was the one to…do you remember when I told you about my brother and sister? The ones with the scars?”

“That…! That can’t be right!” Banshee trembled. 

“You told me your mother’s name was Plague, right?”

Once again, Banshee stiffened. She was silent and still for so long that Shallowfig would have thought that she had died from shock if he couldn’t feel her breathing against him. “Dark stars,” she finally exclaimed. “I thought you just grew tired of me–I never would have thought!--I didn’t think you were afraid!”

“It was my brother’s fear more than mine,” Shallowfig explained, heart twitching at the memory. “He wasn’t okay when he heard about us. If we could meet, it meant she wasn’t too far away, and he was really scared. I couldn’t give your family a reason to want to stay as close as you did. I’m sorry.”

Banshee’s eyes met his, glistening with shock and misery and too many things to name. Then she laughed a heavy, beaten sound. “Look at me! Complaining about how we parted as kits when you just told me your own kit was sick. How pathetic!”

“Enough of that!” Shallowfig snapped, rising. 

Banshee smiled. “I see you’re still defensive of friends who speak badly about themselves.”

Shallowfig blinked, then sat back down. “I guess I am.”

Something seemed to cross Banshee’s mind. She rushed to her paws. “I overstayed my welcome,” she realized. “I should go.”

“No!” Shallowfig exclaimed before he could stop himself. “Uh–I mean. Yeah, you probably have a family to get back to, huh?”

Silence. “I don’t.”

“Oh. That’s goo–Uhm. Okay.”

Banshee smiled softly. “Be seeing you.”

“Yeah. Be seeing you.”

–

For a little bit, curled in his nest with his kits clambering on top of him, Shallowfig’s perpetual emptiness was a little lighter, a little more far away, like a rainstorm that had been looming over him had passed, distant enough now for his fur to avoid the rain, but close enough for the cold weather to bite his skin. 

He hadn’t expected to run into Banshee again, nor for their meeting to bring him such warmth. Sure, he had imagined their reunion quite a few times as a kit, and a few more as an apprentice, and, alright, once or twice as a warrior. But they had been kits then. Even if they could be friends now, which still didn’t feel all too likely, it wasn’t like they would be….

“I smell fish!” Tendrilkit’s high-pitched voice broke into his thoughts, and perhaps broke Shallowfig’s ear. 

“Don’t be silly,” Shallowfig yawned. “Come here, you got dirt all over your fur.” He held a squirming Tendrilkit between his paws and resisted the urge to rest his eyes, as he knew he would only fall asleep again. 

More awake now, a scent caught his nose. Fish? Was Tendrilkit right?

“Stay here,” He instructed the four little ones, before going to poke his head out of the den. A pile of minnows on the ground greeted him. Banshee stood just behind them, sharp-smelling herbs dripping from her jaws. She set them down. “I thought maybe you would like some help?”

The corners of Shallowfig’s lips curled upward. He nodded to the inside. “Come in!”

==========================

@elementaldeityoffood

--I like to think that the reason they both felt such strong feelings about their relationship, even in adulthood, is that when they were together, they felt like they could be themselves. Their greatest supporter was the other, they felt the best they could be when they were with each other. 

The exact memories may fade away (some stay), but that feeling stays with you, and with it’s gone, you only wish for it to come back.

--Shallowfig has four kits! One son (Racemekit [ra-seem]), and three she-cats. So far Tendrilkit is the only one I named.