#settiegawa writes

trauma buddies ! Simon had to live most of his life in a world with no stars and almost no life. Engi... well Engi caused the death of all stars and life there for a minute, but my point is that aside from the Captain they're the only ones that know what expierencing that is like so they bond over the... horror of it all.

on that same train of thought, they both suffer from the whole "i killed people, so im terrible person" mindset even though they both regret everything. they kind of end up making a deal along the lines of "if you dont think that i'm a bad person, then you can't think that you're a bad person because we're in the same boat" deal

once Simon finally warms up to him, he follows Engi around like a lost puppy. he doesn't know his way around the ship well, and doesn't trust anyone so he just tends to stick with Engi where ever he goes

Engi has been secretly working on designs for a prosthetic for Simon ! he's never worked on something like that so it's a little hard, it's also hard to know what Simon would like because well... Simon doen't even know what he likes since he's never really had an opportunity to be picky

Engi almost cried the first time he made Simon laugh. it wasn't even anything big, a tiny sound easy to miss, a slight uptick of Simon's lips from watching Engi fumble through another squabble with Celci. He did hear it though, eyes misting over [i'll cut it there i've thought about this too much and this is supposed to be hcs-]

Engi is a really good and patient teacher when it comes to showing Simon all of the things that they didn't have/no longer had in his universe. even though he does get frustrated easily, Simon is a pretty good student

Engi specially programmed Simon into the computer's handprint recognition thing

Simon is, understandably, horrifically touch starved, mean while Engi is just naturally a touchy person. At first, Simon hated all of the casual contact but almost without him realizing it became something he would search out on his own

they're both the most oblivious people i've ever seen, they wouldn't actually get together unless practically forced *cough* Cleci and Captain pls help them they're idiots *cough*

really the reason that Simon started to come around to Engi and start trusting him is because of how damaged Engi is from the whole almost destroying the multiverse thing. Simon and Engi both have horrible nightmares from everything they went through and would repeatedly stumble across each other on the ship when everyone else was fast asleep. neither of them would talk about why they were awake, instead there was this kind of understanding between them and they would keep each other company

Simon is not good with words. Not when it comes to himself, not when it comes to emotions. he doesn't make big proclamations, he's not the type to say "I love you" all the time. rather, he expresses those things in actions. little brushes of contact, helpful gestures. basically he's an acts of service guy

they are The Friendly Torment Duo aka they are the biggest little shits on the ship and god forbid if they make you the victim of their shenanigans

Engi basically having to show Simon what being a person is like. having trust, existing with softness, being able to relax out fo that fight or flight that Simon has spent his whole life in. not pushing, or forcing. letting Simon progress into really living in his own time, but being a steady force. support, a good example, patience, a willingness to explain without judgement, and be a sounding board while Simon tries to figure out feelings, ideas, dynamics he never had the luxury of before

Engi getting to introduce Simon to media !!! Movies, shows, books, videos, pictures, audio !!! he's especially fond of books of all kinds, and anything documenting nature, animals, or really anything about Earth

Simon definitely has chronic pain from... everything. Simon who was taught for so long that any sign of weakness got you killed, even if not immediately then slowly starved because you were no longer valuable enough to waste resources on. who's been trying to hard to let go of those patterns of thoughts, but a lifetime of reinforcement doesn't disappear just because you want it to. working himself half to death, gritted teeth, sweat pouring off of him as every part of his body is screaming at him to stop. grunting out frustrated "I'm fine"s when the crew asks questions. finally relenting when Engi finds him, slumped against a wall breathing heavy where he didn't think anyone would see him. but of course Engi would find him there, and Simon can't lie to him. no matter much he wishes he could in that moment. just so fucking tired, exhausted in the way that only pushing your body so far beyond its limits can make you. giving in and letting Engi help him, even when he'd been fending off friendly faces all day, because he's the only one Simon would let help him, see him like this, trust when he feels broken and bretrayed by his own body

them both figuring out Relationship Stuff together. because Engi has always been too focused on his work to even really think about dating, and romance was the last thing on anyones mind in Simon's world so even the idea is kind of foreign to him

Simon is just, the most perfect example of a transmasc nonbinary i have ever seen. in a "definitely not a woman, and not really a man but thats close enough" kind of way. He/They

Engi on the other hand, is the post that was like "i'm probably nonbinary but i have a job so i cant think about that" to me. BUT if he did actually stop working long enough to think about it Engi would realize that their gender is basically just "Yes". you can refer to them as literally anything and it's chill. no real preference on pronouns but he's most used to being referred to in a masc way, so if you ask she'll say he/she/they

uuuggghhhhh Simon going from a world where even the bare minimum of survival is scarce at best, to being with Engi on the ship where there is more than he can even dream of in his wildest fantasies. things like gender affirming care

so Damien. i have to start this off by saying that he is even less equipped to deal with this senario than Simon was. we are talking pre-WKM, he is the definition of "just some guy". and yes we know that as the mayor, he is hard working and intelligent, and when it came down to it, when he accepted that he really is trapped in that sub at the whims and mercy of whoever put him down there, he could get it done. if to take those pictures truly was the only reason for him to be down there, he could do it. but the moment the eel makes itself known, the moment he truly believes that he isn't alone down there and that there is something bigger going on, will be his undoing. with the idea of that one little sliver of control he had over the situation taken away, his life being placed in the hands of some unknown thing, he will begin to crumble. it will not be an honorable death like Simon's, nor will it be a cowards death, but instead something unremarkable like so many convicts come before

Dark is an interesting one, but i believe him to be one of the egos with the highest chance of survival. and it is very hard for me to say anything about him without heavily getting into my own peresonal headcanon about how him and the egos work, so i'll save you that. instead i will say that even though we are all more than familiar with his 'temper' shall we call it, he is also incredibly calulating, always seeming two steps ahead of us, and he has remained one of the most powerful beings we have been shown. he would be infuriated with being put in this situation, but he would find a way to make it out alive. but maybe not without taking a moment to stare that ignorant god back in its eye and if even for a fraction make it question its choices

The Host is of course the one that i've thought about before, and while i love him dearly, he has no chance of survival. while the environment of being inside the lung may be less distressing for him than some others due to his lack of sight, that is the only hint of an advantage that he has. the Host, even after what lead to him existing in place of the Author, would still have far too much of an ego. too quickly would he become reassured with the power of his own abilities, even when faced with the eel, when that power ultimately is his downfall. he relies so entirely on his own narrations, but how would you even begin to describe what happens in the lung? the ocean, the eel, the god? he would drive himself mad even attempting to describe the cosmic horror of it all. simply functioning in his normal way would lead him down the road of trying to know the unknowable, and he is stuborn enough to push against that wall until his own mind breaks