This is an excerpt from the upcoming Semantics fic titled Understatement. Shawn is in London; Despereaux has made a very attractive proposition (Rhetoric) and Juliet has given Shawn the go-ahead to accept (Idiom from his POV, Common Ground from hers), on the condition that he tells her everything afterwards. While she waits, her imagination runs wild.
My current draft of Understatement is over five thousand words long, and different sections fit several different days of Kinktober prompts, so I'm just going to post excerpts as the days go by and then the finished product at the end. Today's prompt: masturbation.
She turned up the vibration again and pulled the toy out so she could use the wet tip like a bullet, finally working it under the hood of her clit and practically buckling in half when it touched the oversensitive head. Her legs were trembling, then outright shaking; she pushed herself upright with her free hand and curled over, gasping. The design of the toy kept the lower portion dry so it could be gripped more easily as a handle, but at this angle, she could see how wet the curved shaft and butterfly teaser had become. They were threatening to drip onto the bed; it was no wonder she was having trouble stopping the toy from slipping off. She thrust it slickly back inside instead to push the teaser as hard as she could against her clit while her muscles pulsed through the first climax.
As soon as her vision started to come back into focus, she carefully pulled the toy out to clean up with still-trembling hands. She hadn’t heard her phone go off, but she still checked it hopefully, just in case.
No new messages.
She groaned in frustration and flopped her head back down on the pillow. This could be a good sign, right? Shawn usually did check his phone when he was working, unless it was a life-or-death situation—and even then, he might still sneak a peek. During sex, on the other hand, he never so much as glanced in its direction unless they were looking at something together. It was possible he was still working and just didn’t have WiFi access, but she preferred to imagine that the radio silence meant he was busy with something very unprofessional.
(‘Preferred to imagine’ was putting it very lightly. It was impossible not to imagine.)
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When the convenient reason for living together disappears, it becomes painfully obvious that they haven’t really talked this through.
“She was there all morning, K,” says Cassian, mild, his hand still warm against her leg. “Is something up?”
K2 tilts his head. “I did not mean your room, Cassian. I was speaking about Jyn’s room.”
They all stare at him. Given that she and Cassian have been bunking together for nearly a month—which, despite their never addressing it in public, seems to be common knowledge on base—this is all making very little sense.
“You’re positive you’re not short-circuiting?” Jyn asks, now feeling somewhat concerned.
“I’m not short-circuiting,” K2 snaps. "Are you?”
“K—” Cassian warns.
“Power has been restored to the south quadrant,” K2 explains, as though appalled the rest of them are only just finding out about such important news. “Everyone is returning to their original quarters. Your room is yours again.”
Jyn is skilled at masking her reactions by now; she’s had years of practice. Her stomach clenches involuntarily, and her heart stutters pointlessly against her chest, but she keeps her face even. She doesn’t so much as blink.
Beneath the table, Cassian’s hand stiffens against her thigh.
the things we can no longer hide [jyn/cassian, rogue one]
part 4 of semantics
They lie there in silence for a while, and Cassian—warm and relaxed—lets his eyes slide closed, listening to the comforting beat of Jyn’s heart against his side.
“Cassian?”
“Yeah?”
She’s quiet for a long moment, so long that Cassian thinks she might have drifted off again.
“You know how everyone thinks we’re sleeping together?”
what’s mine is now (has long been) yours [jyn/cassian, rogue one]
In which a misunderstanding spirals out of control and now they live together.
part 3 of the semantics series
Cassian hears the news from Princess Leia, after he’s finished briefing her on his and K2’s recent scouting mission.
“We’re short on rooms,” Leia explains, as they walk down the hall. “We’re asking people to double up. You won’t mind sharing with your wife, I assume?”
Cassian just barely avoids walking straight into the wall.
“My what?” he manages, stumbling a bit.
“Your wife,” Leia repeats, like she really doesn’t have time for this conversation.
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Idea: K2so finds Jyn&Cassian sleeping together on Cassian bunk and doesn't understand the concept of sharing bed
Whoops, I hit post in this way too soon. Anyways, enjoy some fix-it fluff with bed sharing because I’m weak ;_;
“You are sleeping with Jyn,” K2 announces out of nowhere, and Cassian almost chokes. He stumbles forward against the control panel, smashing his hand on the buttons. The lights in the cockpit flicker.
“K!” he sputters, shaking out his smarting hand.
The droid turns to him, glancing down. “Did you mean to press that button? Is it too bright for you?”
Cassian slumps back, sucking at the new red welt on his left thumb.
“The brightness has never been a problem before. Do you need to get your eyes checked?”
“Just finish the coordinates,” Cassian grouses. He moves to secure his headset and thinks, not for the first time in his long friendship with K2, that meaning well and acting well are two very different things.
god i love your fics SO so much omg they’re so good. i only just realised that you wrote both Lucky and the semantics series, after finding them individually and loving them SO much. you have all the characters so perfectly written, and your despereaux makes me giggle and kick my feet just as much as in the show. his speech patterns are very specific and you just have them down perfectly, i can imagine every word being said.
I started replying to this days ago and I can't find the tab where I was doing it, but I'm not sure if it's lost or just buried, so I'm going to just answer now: this absolutely made my day. Thank you so much for saying this! Most of what makes writing fun for me is sharing it with other people and talking about it.
My original reply to this had a whole bunch of stuff about little tricks I use for getting their voices right, like Despereaux's speech patterns, and some excerpts from upcoming material or alternate drafts, but I'll have to come back to this later and build that back up. Watch this space :)
Better Load the Dice is currently on Chapter 8 (Song of Shlomo) and Chapter 9 (as yet unnamed) is in the works. I know I don't have many readers, but here are a few extra bits and pieces for the ones I do have, because I greatly appreciate each and everyone one of them.
First of all, the title is from the lyrics to the full version of the Psych theme song. The full line is better load the dice, ’cause they'll do it anyway. I felt it had an implication of being in a situation where playing fair just means your opponent will take advantage of you, so playing dirty is the only way to even the field, and that felt appropriate.
Below the cut: some redacted content for fun, plus the complete Statement of Faith of the Ranch for reference purposes, although it's less fun.
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In Chapter 5, Shawn slips up and references San Francisco's gay district as somewhere you could do fun stuff with rope, and Juliet intervenes before he blows their cover:
"Yessirree! Julie and I are suuuper stoked to be here." Shawn hooked an arm around Juliet, pulling her to his side and patting her on the shoulder. This dork personality is kinda fun. "We're getting ready to tie the knot, and where better to do that than a ropes course? Well, apart from maybe somewhere in the Castro—"
Juliet stepped on his foot.
In the final draft, this was his attempt at backtracking.
"…municipality of Brazil," he amended. "It's in the state of Paraná." He overpronounced the name as dramatically as possible. "Lots of great rock-climbing workshops there. I've never been, personally, but I'm told the views are stunning."
This was the alternative version.
"Castricum," he amended. "Castricum aan Zee. It's a seaside resort in the Netherlands where actual sailors can teach you nautical knots. Best in the world, I've heard, but I'm afraid I've never been; I suffer from a debilitating fear of Holland. Can't even listen to Kiss on My List in case I misremember the artist's name." He cleared his throat. "But I digress."
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The scene where this guy was introduced had to be rearranged, so his introduction has been redacted for now, but this would have been it:
It was the man Shawn had described yesterday as the whitest guy he'd ever seen. He was carrying a water bottle with a taped-on name tag that read NIELS; Shawn wasn't sure if someone had been trying to write "Neil's" or if his actual name was Niels, but either way, it explained why he looked so intensely Scandinavianish. Scandinaviany. Scandinavy, maybe? He could just say Scandinavian, of course, but that was boring.
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Ropes course shenanigans:
He managed to keep a lid on it throughout the orientation, although he did find himself trying to think up a joke about the word "orientation" while Jeff explained the process and Cecelia held up the gear.
The Low Ropes course looked sort of like a jungle gym for adults. Note to self, Shawn thought, tell Gus to look up jungle gyms for adults. If they don't exist, tell Gus we need to make one.
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A random Shules Plus moment (which will probably eventually be added to a future chapter):
"Remember the guy from Karen's husband's fundraiser?" Juliet asked.
Shawn squinted. "Do you mean the one who looked like a calm Jason Mantzoukas or the one who looked like a crazed Jason Momoa?"
"No, I mean the volunteer firefighter you told me to arrest for carrying a deadly weapon, by which you meant—"
"His biceps." Shawn nodded knowingly. "Right."
"…Oh." Juliet cleared her throat.
"What?"
"I thought you were talking about his dick."
Shawn gasped in mock-scandal. "Detective O'Hara!"
"What? I've heard it both ways," she complained.
"That's stealing," he informed her. "You're stealing my line. I should arrest you for that."
"Go ahead," she said, then smirked. "Oh, no, you don't have the badge and cuffs for that, do you."
"Well, no, I don't have a badge," he said, smirking suggestively.
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The Ranch's Statement of Faith from Shawn and Juliet's info packets:
Statement of Faith
HOLY SCRIPTURE
We believe in the Scripture of the Old and New Testament as verbally inspired by God, inerrant in the original writings, and that they are of supreme and final authority in faith and life.
GOD
We believe in one God, eternally existing in three persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
We believe that Jesus Christ was begotten by the Holy Spirit, and born of the Virgin Mary, is true God, and true man.
We believe in the resurrection of the crucified body of our Lord, in His ascension to Heaven, in His present life there for us as High Priest and Advocate.
MAN
We believe that man was created in the image of God; that he sinned, and thereby incurred not only physical death, but also spiritual death which is separation from God; and that all human beings are born with a sinful nature, and in the case of those who reach moral responsibility, become sinners.
We believe that marriage unites one man and one woman in a lifetime commitment to each other (Genesis 2:23-24; Matthew 19:4-6). Marriage provides for intimate companionship, pure sexual expression (Genesis 2:25; Ephesian 5:31-33), procreation, and reflects the relationship of Christ and the church (Genesis 1:28; Proverbs 5:15-19; 1 Corinthians 7:1-5).
We believe that God has commanded that no intimate sexual activity be engaged in outside of marriage between one man and one woman. We believe that any form of homosexuality, lesbianism, bisexuality, bestiality, incest, fornication, adultery, and pornography are sinful perversions of God’s gift of sex.
We believe that God disapproves and forbids any attempt to alter one’s gender by surgery or appearance (Genesis 2:24; Genesis 19:5, 13; Genesis 26:8-9; Leviticus 18:1-30; Romans 1:26-29; 1 Corinthians 5:1; 6:9; 1 Thessalonians 4:1-8; Hebrews 13:4).
SALVATION
We believe that the Lord Jesus Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, as a representative and substitutionary sacrifice; and that all who believe in Him are justified on the grounds of His shed blood.
We believe that all who receive by faith the Lord Jesus Christ are born again of the Holy Spirit and thereby become children of God.
We believe in the bodily resurrection of the just and unjust, the everlasting, conscious punishment of the lost.
MISSION
We believe our Lord has given to His Church the great commission to evangelize the world, and that this evangelization is the great mission of the Church.
(If you look up the text of any individual bullet point, you'll find it verbatim on the websites of multiple churches and other Christian groups, although each site has their own order and grouping system and some have more or fewer than others. None of them credit the original author, otherwise I would too.)
