#seeing red

nothing irritates me more than when people claim that the rape scene in seeing red “isn’t canon”. in my opinion, it makes perfect sense, and is perfectly in character. it makes him realise that, in the state he is, he can never truly love, he can never be truly good for those he does care about. so he leaves, he works to make himself able to genuinely love again, love like he did as william, be worthy of love. he doesn’t do that to try and get in buffy’s good graces again. he doesn’t expect her to forgive him. he does it to be better, period. and people acting like it’s “so out of character” or saying “i love spike, except for that one scene” really irritates me because… it isn’t out of character. you can’t just seperate it from him. you can love him even with that scene included in canon, because it’s complicated. he’s complicated. that’s the point. this isn’t to say what he did is okay, it absolutely isn’t, but it is in character.