Lately I've been having fun making the feeder girls fatter than me. I'll make them eat with me whenever they take me out, and once things progress to funnelling I'll funnel them well but intentionally fuck up my own funneling so they get way more calories than me. I make enough money off Dizzy's to be able to afford enough weight loss medication to stay mobile, but eventually the feeders get too big to want to go anywhere so they just get funneled at home every date.
What can I say, I'm fucked in the head and I like when they whine to me about how they never wanted to get fat lol
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Story Summary: Steve Rogers has a girlfriend. And a boyfriend. Integrating two asocial partners sounds difficult, but it might be easier than anyone thinks.
Quick Facts: Romance â Steve Rogers/Reader; Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes; eventual Steve/Bucky/Reader â Female Reader
Story Warnings: Reader-insert that verges on OFC, written in 1st person past tense
Chapter 5: Test Case Scenario
Chapter Summary: Helping someone discover new things (or things new-to-them) is a love language. Or at least, a âlikeâ language. Progress is progress.
Chapter Word Count: 3187
A/N: Bucky and Reader at this point are becoming friends but also being a jerk is a love language in this circle. Bisexual on bisexual violence <3
~
For all the ways it could possibly go south, Bucky was surprisingly open to trying new places to eat. Within certain parameters of courseâ it couldnât be above a certain level of busy, and where he needed to sit was limited to specific areas based on sightlines and exits, but once all that was taken care of, he was actually pretty relaxed. So the three of us were out again, this time at a sandwich shop. Steve had ordered a meat-loaded monstrosity, and Bucky had stared intently at the menu for about thirty seconds before he frowned and ordered the same thing Steve had.
I tried not to psycho-analyze him, because he was probably beyond a school of psychiatrists, and I was not about to throw stones out of my spiderweb-cracked glass house, but Iâd been hanging out with the two of them often enough that I noticed Bucky did that a lot. Unless something caught his eye relatively quickly, heâd just order whatever Steve did. Steve was boring enough that Bucky never seemed dissatisfied, but sometimes he looked at what I (or anyone else close enough) had ordered with some curiosity. Like now.
âWant to try a piece?â I asked. âI can cut this last little bite in half.â
Bucky shook his head and looked down. I shrugged and ate the rest of it, and turned my attention to Steve, who was smiling at me. The sandwich had been pretty spicy, and my mouth and lips felt pleasantly hot still, so when he leaned closer, safely hidden in our little corner table in the relatively quiet off-hour, I couldnât help but grin as I leaned in to meet him.
About an inch away, he suddenly realized his impending mistake and held me back. âWaitâ no!â
I tried so hard to get to him, but I had no chance. âSpicy kisses! Spicy kisses!â
âNo! No spicy kisses,â Steve said, but he laughed even as he fended me off. âHave you been drinking hot sauce? I can smell it from here.â
âHhhhhhhow dare you,â I said, trying to breathe on him on the first word so hard I lost my breath. I stopped pushing at him and folded my arms as I sat back. âI didnât love the sandwich, but the jalapenos were still good.â
âDid they double layer them?â
âNah, the spread was spicy too. It was all right.â I noticed Bucky was staring at me, and I looked right back at him. âWhat?â
He cracked a small smile, and dragged one of his French fries around the plate. âYou are so weird.â
I made my eyes as big as I could and clasped my hands together under my chin. âThank you,â I said like it was the sweetest thing in the universe. I then got a fry to the face. I picked it up and ate it. âYum.â
âAsshole,â he said, but he still had a little smile.
âDo you like hot sauce?â I asked.
He turned blank. His âthinkingâ face, I assumed, because it came out fairly often and never seemed bad, unless he immediately followed it by leaving. Right now, he just sat and mulled the question over. âIâŚdonât know,â he said and squinted suspiciously at the condiments.
âItâs okay; Steveâs got no taste,â I said and took a ketchup packet, a hot chili sauce packet, and mixed the contents together.
âGross,â Steve muttered. I rolled my eyes. Mr. No-I-Donât-Need-Anything-To-Go-With-My-Aioli could shove the hypocrisy.
I pushed the very basic spicy ketchup towards Bucky, and nodded at his fries. âJust try one,â I said. âYouâve got a nice big soda to wash it down with if you donât like it, but itâs good.â I snaked a fry bit, dipped it, and ate it just to show him it wasnât poison.
Bucky stared at it for a few seconds, looked at me to make sure I wasnât dying (and I strongly resisted the urge to fake poison because I was still figuring out what his buttons were, even though it would have been so funny), and tentatively dipped a tiny corner of his fry into it. He chewed way longer than was necessary, waited, then dragged a full fry through it and ate the whole thing.
Bucky looked at Steve. âWimp,â he said.
âHey!â Steve said but I could barely hear him over my own laughter. The experiment was a success, as Bucky smugly continued eating his fries with his new ketchup concoction.
Amused and dodging Steveâs half-hearted attempts to take a swipe at me, my mind started to wander. Iâd gotten Steve into some new things. What else did Bucky have yet to experience?
~
Food wasâ well, not safe, but probably the easiest thing to be adventurous with. It felt a little silly in some waysâ Bucky had listed off at least ten countries as some of the places he explored while he was off finding himselfâ but also, Bucky was a guy who, at least at this point in his life, only lived on the bare minimum, so how much had he explored really?
Today I had a bag of candy while I was hanging out with Steve. Steve had had his own bag, a big one at thatâ and had devoured about all of it as soon as he sat down. Tony could joke about Wertherâs all he wanted, but I didnât know anybody who could put away peach rings like Steve did.
Bucky sauntered in just after the sun had gone down, paused only a moment in the connection point where he could have easily gone for the bedroom, and chose to come in and sink into a chair across from the couch. Willingly spending time with me aroundâ someday I was going to stop being surprised by that, but for now, Iâd take the compliment.
âHey Buck,â Steve said with a soft smile. âHow was the time out?â
Bucky shrugged, and glanced at me. I held up my candy assortment, and picked one out. âWant some candy?â
He stared at the piece in my hand. And then blinked several times. Then he scrunched his nose. âWhyâs it look like that?â
I almost made a smart comment about how he had been in the world for a while, surely he had seen candy in passing, but then I thoughtâ I didnât actually know that, I didnât know what it meant to put your brain back together and what you did and did not notice or remember, so I stowed the sarcasm for the moment. âYouâve never had blue raspberry?â I held the piece and the bag closer towards him. âThis is a travesty that must be rectified.â
Bucky looked at the itty-bitty little piece of totally unthreatening candy and grimaced. âI think anything calling itself âblue raspberryâ is probably the real travesty,â he muttered.
I couldnât actually argue that. âAre you sure you donât want to try one?â I asked. He hesitated, but after several seconds, shook his head. âOkay,â I said, and ate the piece. âIf you change your mind, let me know before the bag is gone.â
âWhat if I want one after the bag is gone?â
âI could try and feed you like a baby bird, but I donât think any of us would enjoy that.â
He crinkled his nose, but his lips turned up with it. âGross.â
I laughed and almost threw a candy at himâ but thought better of it and popped it into my mouth. Steve snorted, and I leaned back and dangled a piece of candy next to him. He recoiled like it was radioactive.
âWanna be adventurous?â I asked, knowing the answer.
âNo,â he said, and even scooted away.
Bucky was by my shoulder in a second. He hesitated, but held his hand out. I tried to stifle my smile, but I placed the one single tiny piece of candy in his massive metal paw, and after several seconds he still didnât budge.
âHey, was cough syrup still laced with cocaine when you two were kids?â I asked, filled my hand with candy, and put all of it into my mouth.
Bucky gave me a glare, then lightened up just in time to say, completely deadpan, âI donât remember,â before tossing it back into his mouth.
I cackled so hard I started choking and thus completely missed his reaction, while Steve tried to figure out how to pound on my back without breaking it.
~
âHey losers,â I said, not looking up from my game as the door opened and two familiar treads came in and stopped at the entry. Bucky grumbled something under his breath and, while I couldnât hear it, I could imagine what it was. âSteve texted me so calm down mother.â
âStill should check,â he grumped.
Suddenly a package was tossed in my lap. I jerked backâ thankfully after I had escaped virtual death, so I was able to pause and investigate. It looked like a bag of mixed candies, with a name I had never heard of. I looked up and Bucky was standing nearby, looking around the room.
âTheyâre citrus,â Bucky mumbled, keeping his eyes away from me as he sat down in the chair.
âNeat. Thanks!â I said, and as soon as the game stopped saving, I exited out for the main TV menu. Steve came back from the kitchen with several drinks, handing one off to Bucky and then one he slipped into my lap before he moved to sit on my other side. I popped the tab. âHey, Buckyâ do you like music?â
He grimaced. âSome, I guess,â he said nonchalantly. âSome of itâs just a lot ofâŚnoise.â
âHm,â I said as I took a sip from my drink.
Bucky suddenly had eyes on me like he was a hawk. It was kind of freaky, but I didnât flinch. âWhat,â he said flatly.
âWhat?â I asked. I picked up the remote and turned my head towards the TV. âYou guys have anything you want to watch?â
Bucky kept staring at me, I could feel it. Unfortunately for him, it only made me want to smile so big. Steve did, in fact, smile. He also rolled his eyes and stole the remote right out of my hand. âKnock it off Buck,â he said as he started navigating menus like a man on a mission. âYouâre only encouraging her.â
âShush; let him fuel my mischief,â I said and snuggled in next to him.
Bucky rolled his eyes, but when I peeked again, he looked relaxed. âYour nonsense, more like,â he said, crossing his arms over his chest.
âSame diff,â I said, and chucked one of the candies at him.
Over the next few days, I made three new playlists that I then shared selectively with Steve. The first one was âB â Calm, Easy, Quietâ; the second was made after a little hemming and hawing and titled, âB â All the Noise (To Drown Out Thoughts)â. The third one was made without any hesitation, but shared with a littleâ âB â If He Has A Sense of Humorâ.
All of them were a mess of genres and traversed across multiple eras. The first was a collection of slower, quieter, deeper songs. The second was full of frenetic, screaming, and otherwise super messy songs that might be the exact thing he had grimaced aboutâŚbut also might come in handy. You never knew who needed a little metalcore, and sometimes neither did they. The third was just me being a little shit. Who knew so many oldies were about memories? I threw in a few about how swell fellas are too. For the romantic in him.
Bucky: You think youâre funny do you
I sent back a lot of emojis full of obnoxious smiley faces, flowers, suns, and kissy faces. A few days later, he sent me a link to a playlist. I listened dutifully to the whole thing, and every single song was just a bunch of machine grinding noises masquerading as EDM.
My boyfriend had great taste in men, I had to admit.
~
âHey, look at this,â I said to Steve as soon as I got inside his apartment. He backed away, giving me room to set my bag on the counter, and belatedly I realized he had been coming to greet me with a hug. âOh, hi,â I said and kissed him quick before turning back to my goodies. âHeyâ check this out.â
âShould I be afraid of how excited you are, or excited too?â he asked, slipping one arm around me as he leaned in to look.
âYou can be both,â I said and pulled two packages out of the bag. They were gift sets, one an assortment of tiny shampoo bottles, and the other an assortment of tiny liquid soaps. Steve squinted at them, which was not unfoundedâ the packaging was very bright pink and more geared for the girliest teenager you knew. However.
âWhy?â he asked, tone loaded with suspicion, and gave me a stare to match. Maybe he was spending a little too much time with Bucky. Normally I got at least a minute to lead in to my shenanigans.
âI remembered you have that stupid interview in a few days,â I said, and indeed, he winced at the mention. Some right-wing douchebag masquerading as a âcentristâ. What else was new. âSo I got you these.â
He kept looking at me, even though his lips twitched a little. âStill doesnât explain.â
Because I was trying to find a suitably dramatic and hilarious way to explain it, but all I could do was shrug. âWell, I know you hate that guy, and I found out he has some thing about men smelling âfeminineâ or whatever,â I said. âApparently he went off on it for like, a half-hour on some trash alpha-male podcast or something, so thisââ I held up the package of shampoos, âIs gonna make your hair smell so girly.â
He definitely looked more intriguedâ just as I knew he would. âI got the soaps just in caseâ I know youâre fussier about that, but theyâre all super frou-frou, so if you can stand the smell, itâs a really easy way to get on his nerves right from the get-go, before even shaking hands.â
I set the package back down and waited for, at the very least, faint praise for my thoughtfulness. But when Steve looked at me, it was with that sort of melting expression of adoration that made me so soft, but seemed way too much for something this small. Poor thing must have been more stressed about this stupid interview than he was willing to say. âI love you,â he said earnestly.
âI know.â I gave him a quick kiss. âAnd I love you too.â But when I went back to the bag, I hesitated.
âWhat else?â Steve asked and put his chin on my shoulder. âIf you want to dress me, weâll have to discuss that a little bit more.â
âYou are a grown-ass man who can dress himself.â I played with the bag handle. âHowâs Bucky with scents and stuff?â
Steve chuckled and kissed the side of my head. âHe mostly sticks with the basics. Whatâd you get him now?â
âWell, for one I thought he might like to try some of those.â I gestured at the stuff I gave Steve. âHe isnât super macho tough guy, and he might genuinely like them. But I also gotâŚâ I pulled out three more gift sets. Shampoo, soap, and also lotion, because fuck it, why not. âHe doesnât indulge on his own. But I donât want to be pushy, you know? I just thinkâŚâ
âYouâre overthinking,â he said, quiet but firm. âTheyâre great. Iâll tell Bucky you got them for me to try and that Iâd appreciate the help in working through them.â
âYou donât have to lie.â I leaned back into him. âHeâll see right through you anyways.â
âYeah.â He kissed me. âBut itâs the thought that counts.â
~
We never talked about it. I had no idea if he even bothered to try the soaps, but that wasnât really the point. They were for him, not for me, and if he liked them, great, he could talk to Steve about it to get more, and if not, no harm done.
We were out again, at a pizza place this time, late one night. Or early in the morningâ I wasnât really paying attention to the clock anymore. Bucky was quieter than usual, but he hadnât ditched us yet, which I took for a good sign, even if I did want to kick Steve under the table for the way his eyebrows kept creasing. I didnât know what was going on with them, but if they didnât want to bring it up, then I was perfectly happy to let it rest. Bucky and I were friendly enough, I thought, but I was nowhere near nosing in to all his various moods.
So while I wasnât as obnoxious as I could be, I still behaved like myself. I ordered all the food while Steve was distracted, and made sure Bucky had a lot of fun things to try, with a few safe standbys just in case. He picked at his food quite a bit, and every time he finished eating a slice he would wait until Steve gave him another oneâ until Steve got really into telling a story about Clint, and Bucky waited and waited and waited, his eyes flicking towards the remaining food. Steve didnât notice quick enough, so I took a chance and put a slice on Buckyâs plate, not sure if he would take it from me or not. But Bucky relaxed his shoulders, gave me a short nod, and started eating again while listening to Steve talk.
He ate quickly enough that I was able to slip him three more slices without Steve noticing, all of them different. The fourth one though, Bucky put his hand out. âNot that one,â he said, making Steve stop, blink, and look around in confusion.
âYouâve had it before?â I asked and started sifting through the other pizza boxes. Most of them were emptyâ a hazard of eating out with two men who could chow through food in ways even competitive eaters could only dream of.
âIâve tried some things without you,â Bucky muttered.
It didnât sound like a dig, but it did make me pause. âYou donât have to try everything I give you,â I said.
âI know,â Bucky said. âBut IâŚlike it.â He frowned and looked focused in a way that let me know there was something else there. But he shook his head. I was curious, but didnât press. Hopefully heâd tell me someday. âAnd you think of things sometimes Steve doesnât.â
âSo itâs okay to keep doing?â I said. Bucky nodded. I grinned. âExcellent.â
Buckyâs eyes widened. He looked at Steve, and then at me. âMaybe I take it back,â he said cautiously.
âToo late!â I said and picked up a piece of pizza. Heâd drop that âmaybeâ eventually, but for now, I wondered what it would take.
Iâve been tagged twice for this now and Iâve been putting it off not only because I had let my mom borrow a few books I wanted to use for this but also because my book collection is wildly inferior to everyone elseâs and I was really intimidated. But I wanted to participate so here is my very random stack of blue books.
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Why do I have the compulsion to make jokes at a time when nothing should be funny? Why do I mock others for coping with this tragedy with sensationalized sentimentality, when my methods are far worse? Has my mind been so tainted by our culture of irony that Iâm incapable of feeling any real emotion? Is this my way of denying the depths of the horror of what happened? Or am I irreversibly fucked up?
October 13th, 2019: On June 27th, 2018 Harry Styles performed in Indianapolis, Indiana, as part of his first solo tour. Here using the proceeds from the sale of his Treat People With Kindness merchâŚ
October 13th, 2019: On June 27th, 2018 Harry Styles performed in Indianapolis, Indiana, as part of his first solo tour. Here using the proceeds from the sale of his Treat People With Kindness merchandise and part of the ticketsâ sale, he made a donation to Second Helpings.
Second Helpings is an Indianapolis based charity that works to reduce poverty in the area by providing meals to families that live below the poverty line and by training people in the culinary industry. It is estimated that the percentage of families that live below the poverty line in certain Indiana counties is above the national averages. There are families that live in Marionâs county for example who live on a combined income of $25,500/year. However, it has been determined that a family in this area needs at least $50,800 to be self-sufficient. These statistics highlight the fact that a large number of families in the Indianapolis area are food insecure, which means that they lack consistent access to enough food for an active and healthy life.