This is a story about massaging horses, said horses being ascended to the heavens.
As a purveyor of horse violence and equine decline this article is a total antithesis to my rather scandalous views but it's beautifully written and very descriptive about (would you guess it) horse massaging!
Highly recommend for people who enjoy horses
Written by my friend (and fellow horse violence connoisseur) @deadcanons !
The SCP Foundation's 'top-secret' archives, declassified for your enjoyment.
Make sure to give them the love the horses I torture definitely won't get, au revoir!
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Site-20, also nicknamed âThe Toy Houseâ is the primary site for research, storage and testing on anomalous inanimate objects. Many of the SCP Foundationâs more childish SCPs are stored here leading to the siteâs current nickname.
All SCP are non-Keter as the site location is around the ring of a densely populated city.
Notable Personnel!!!
aka me and my friendâs ocsâ
Dr.Deltas
Name: Felix J. Deltas
Occupation: Head of International Communication, Researcher
Security Clearance Level: 3
Location: Site-20, UK
Current Case: SCP-7517
Ethnicity: Egyptian
Citizenship: American
Profile
Felix Deltas is a researcher positioned in Site-20 with extensive knowledge of Item class SCPs and general Anomalous Items. He finished his education with a Masterâs degree in Science in Psychology and has conducted several paranormal investigations yielding varying yet successful results each time.Â
Previous to working with the Foundation, Deltas worked on a YouTube channel where he uploaded recordings of his paranormal work. Such investigative recordings are now confiscated and wiped from the internet with a cover-up story from the DOM stating he âmoved on from the paranormal community and is now focusing his time as a full-time Psychologist in California, USAâ.
Additional Notes
Dr. Deltas is capable of speaking 10 languages. These are Egyptian Arabic, English, Spanish, Tagalog, Latin, Japanese, Korean, French, Chinese and German. New foreign researchers are sent to him for day-one training.Â
He also knows Pig Latin to the dismay of his colleagues. Do not indulge him on this as he once wrote an entire research paper in Pig Latin. It took several days for someone to notice this and have him correct it. Site directors were not pleased.
Once Dr. Deltas has finished researching SCP-7517, he will not be allowed to work with Dr. Ulysses. No, not even if he says please. There have already been enough complaints about Dr.Deltas misconduct from Dr.Ulysses, and other researchers seem to find them very "distracting".
Dr. Deltas is prohibited from accessing Legos, Lego-like bricks and anything alike during working hours as he will find a way to incorporate them into his work and even conduct experiments with them, with or without Director approval. He has also caused several problems using such toys, see Site 20:Lego Stand-off Report.
Note: For the last time do not edit this file to state that Dr. Deltas and Dr. Ulysses are in a relationship. That information is not only irrelevant but unconfirmed. We are still waiting for Dr. Ulyssesâs email of confirmation, patiently.
Note: For the last time do not edit this file to state Dr. Deltas and Dr. Ulysses are in a relationship. We know. That information is also highly irrelevant.
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From this point onward itâs gonna be a lot less formal since I donât have proper files on most peopleâ
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Agent Camila
When Felix ran away from home and escaped to Egypt, Maya followed in his footsteps. She followed breadcrumbs he left behind and ended up joining the California Police Department as a detective.
A few years later, she snuck into Site-20 to find Felix and succeededâ at a cost. She now permanently works for the Foundation and her death was faked to the outside world.
She works as the Siteâs âBackground Checkerâ and makes sure no one is up to no good.
Dr.Ulysses
An excellent and highly praised British researcher thatâs constantly in Autistic burn out and injects coffee in his blood to cope.
He does a lot of heavy lifting when it comes to research activities and itâs a miracle the coffee hasnât killed him yet.
For the love of god donât touch his coffee machine, he has a personal one for a reason and weâre sure what he drinks could kill a godâ
Agent Tarkorov
Second in command of site security, donât let his Bulgarian accent scare you, heâs very much a fun person to be around as long as you donât piss him off!
Commonly seen with either Felix causing mayhem or gossiping with Maya about what someone did in the office.
Dr. Maya
Your average fanfic writer, accidents-that-cause-hiatuses included!
She was roped in by the Foundationâs university program she joined thinking it was a normal school and moved out of Pakistan for it. Oh dear god she was wrong. She was so very wrong.
She also writes fanfiction about Judah and Felix-
Agent Jett
Despite being head of Security training, no one knows much of the person but heâs usually seen either with Maya and Tarkorov or drinking her ass off at the bar with Felix.
Theyâre nice, he promises.
Dr.Ares
Site Director themselves. Sheâs very professional at her job and only tolerates bad behaviour Once. Two strikes and youâre out.
He takes an interest in bugs, but wouldnât tell a soul that besides Maya.
Almost always seen wearing a mask due to their crippling asthma. Despite that, they are in fact a medical doctor!
Dr.N
Man, whatâs up with that mask??
Jett swears heâs seen those goggles before.
Besides that, Heâs just your average researcher really.
