#schusters

DON’T COME BACK FROM THE DEAD JUST TO FEED THESE UNGRATEFUL ASSHOLES, YOU SUFFERED ENOUGH IN LIFE. after this i had elle bid her uncle’s spirit goodbye so he wouldn’t keep coming back to make her pancakes. elle and kerr are busy with work so little jackie mostly gets raised by julianne, who is still unnaturally young because of orchids somehow.

pretending to be a space monster for your alien granddaughter feels like a microaggression. why did you let her buy a lobster roll from a street cart. she was sick all day from street lobster.

elle bonds with her daughter over piano lessons in the basement. did i mention that they’re comically rich now? that should be obvious. they have their own pool and rocket ship and roller rink. anyway.

julianne i’m glad you’re excited about your new bike but you’re like sixty years old, what are you doing.

the family goes to the fair and plays basketball with a nice young man (princess kerr wears a disguise but jackie does not, there is no consistency here). unfortunately there were also hookahs at the fair and julianne is high out of her mind.

you are a senior citizen.

despite this he accepts her invite to a costume party later

i was going to make fun of these two for wearing matching mother daughter costumes but

JACKIE DRESSED AS A TOFU DOG. SHE REALLY DOES TAKE AFTER HER UNCLE. i call foul on princess kerr wearing her work uniform as a costume. why is julianne’s nice young man dressed as a mailman.

that seems ominous

okay so sexy grandma is a vampire now i guess. i don’t think this is the best way to get death’s attention but what do i know. shoutout to the girl who saw this happening and just smiled awkwardly but said nothing.

meanwhile, in the other room, grandma