#schloss hellbrunn

Marcus Sitticus, a seventeenth-century archbishop of Salzburg, was by all account a good and noble man, but he must have made a trying friend. He loved nothing so much as to soak others with water. To that end, from 1613 - 19 he built Schloss Hellbrunn, a magnificent baroque residence whose grounds incorporated the most elaborate fountains and water jokes in the world. Today, you may be pleased to hear, they are all still in perfect working order.

At every turn you will find yourself being sprayed by streams of water from unexpected places - sometimes from above, sometimes from below, sometimes from the sides, and occasionally from all directions at once. With every hedge, paving stone, and piece of statuary holding a potential aquatic surprise, you soon find yourself creeping around cautiously. The most famous of the water jokes is the carved stone outdoor dining table where Sitticus would dine with his friends (among whom there must have been an exceptionally high turnover) on warm summer evenings. Every seat, with the predictable exception of Marcus Sitticus’ own, contained a small hole through which the archbishop could send a surprisingly fierce jet of water when the conversation lulled.

Less threatening is a wide assortment of animated models - serpents, mermaids, and the like - that perform a variety of stunts in the little grottoes and ponds. Most amazing of these is a miniature theater, built in 1750 by an unemployed miner, where 100 or so small wooden figures do their complicated business to the accompaniment of a hurdy-gurdy: a band plays, a guard marches up and down in front of a town hall, and gypsies dance with a bear while a butcher kills a calf. Like everything on the grounds, the whole, including the hurdy-gurdy, is entirely driven by running water. Endlessly fascinating.

Also on the grounds is a folk museum in the little Monatschlössen (so called because it was built in a month) and a zoo. Both are very good, but there is a separate admission charge for each.

Details: Schloss Hellbrunn is open daily from May 1 to August 31 from 8 AM to 5:30 PM, and in April, September, and October from 9 AM to 4 PM. Admission is 25 schillings for adults and 14 schillings for children aged 4 to 15. From central Salzburg take the “H” bus.

William Bryson, The Palace Under the Alps, p4-5