I’ve been trying to make jokes & push through like usual but I’m writing this from my bed, where I have been physically incapable of moving from for hours. It took me a bit to connect the dots but I finally realized- my current injury is triggering my PTSD. The last time I had this injury was exactly three years ago, October 2016, after my abusive ex assaulted & hospitalized me. My neck is killing me but my heart is hurting too & I couldn’t tell you which is worse.. • • I drove up & back to/from Sedona last night using my travel neck pillow as a brace 🤦🏻♀️ the only times I’ve ever hurt my neck like this were via car accident / my abusive ex & tbh on top of the excruciating pain, it puts me in a v dark place [emotionally/mentally] and I’m honestly not sure which feels worse. I was so quiet about my pain in 2016, and I’m still pretty quiet about it all, but I can’t suffer silently anymore. I can’t be the only person who is suffering; I want to start sharing my stories so we can be alone, together. I’ve done so much healing / inner work but have so far to go still. • • I’m beyond exhausted but I know without my health I can’t generate any wealth. I never share these types of things bc I always try to focus on positives & practice what I preach but I’m hurting so badly idk what else to say/do rn. PTSD is so real & so present, I feel like I’m drowning even though I *know* I’m safe now I keep forgetting somehow. This is a living nightmare & I need to find solid ground sooner than later. #mentalhealthawarenessmonth #ptsdrecovery #scarsheal #memoriesremain #domesticviolenceawareness https://www.instagram.com/p/B3hny4CHjIR/?igshid=1lqw11cjxyac
