#say-lene

We begin with the story in general, moving from the bloody wreck that first stepped off the Nautiloid to a more hopeful ending. Then follow nine specific takes on the Dark Urge. I reached out to a few individuals who were kind enough to name songs that capture some of the essence of the characters they made. I strongly recommend asking them about what they made.

Listen to the playlist on spotify or on youtube

Song list below!

answering these fanfic writer asks, ty!

7. tell us about the plot of the first fanfic you ever wrote

oh man...I would have been eight? maybe seven? and the Big Thing in my primary school was the rainbow magic books by Daisy Meadows (I found out recently that this is just a pen name for several different authors in rotation...devastating), which all have an incredibly formulaic plot of fairy of [thing] has had their magical object stolen, without which their magic doesn't function correctly, and it's up to the main characters of the series, two human girls who are friends with the fairies, to help them get it back. my self insert oc was of course the chocolate fairy (a quick google tells me that there is now a real chocolate fairy...but her book was published in 2013 so I think they copied me honestly) and it literally just followed that exact same plot formula lol

8. what’s your relationship with constructive criticism and feedback like? do you seek it out? how well do you take it?

there's a venn diagram with the circles being "people whose opinions I value" and "people I think are good writers", and that lil sweet spot in the middle are the only people whose criticism I care about lol. I don't seek it out exactly in that I'm v shy and don't want to bother people unnecessarily (especially people I admire!!) but if it's offered I'll always take it. I think I take it reasonably well? in that ultimately the point of it is to make me a better writer, which is a good and worthy goal, and there's no sense in getting upset over people trying to help me reach that goal

11. what’s something neat you’ve learned while doing research for something you were writing? also, how much do you worry about doing research in general?

cetacean eyes are so cool, instead of having a pupil that is a big or small circle depending on light level like us their pupil turns into like a crescent moon shape when it's too bright!! also I've done way too much research into victorian era anticoagulants. did you know that sodium citrate was first used as an anticoagulant in 1891??? and it's still used today!!

I don't generally do extensive research for fics, but that's maybe because I already know most of the things I'm gonna be writing about before I write about them...and if I don't know about them I do some uh. reading. around the subject beforehand...so maybe I do a little research. but also, I don't generally need to know about things in a lot of depth, I just like to know bc it's interesting...

40. best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.

(WIP folder ask game)

Ooh, so this is one of the fics in the series of Johanna-centric one-shots I now have planned, my brain having rotated ideas at incredible speed since posting my first Veilguard fic Brilliant Things last month!

Morality Test takes place pre-canon and essentially explores the events that lead to Johanna’s expulsion from the Mourn Watch according to my headcanons.

Basically, the idea first came about as a chance to play around with the idea of Emmrich being an unreliable narrator in terms of telling the Veilguard team the truth about what actually caused his falling out with Johanna. Not necessarily out of any genuine malice, but because he’s grown accustomed to self-deception over the years, especially while resting securely in his comfort zone with no crazy childhood friends to call him out on his bullshit.

To me there just seems there could be more to the story, especially with how Johanna’s introduction scene plays out with a Rook Ingellvar who recognises Johanna as a disgraced ex-Watcher. Johanna’s very quick to dismiss the accusations levied against her as lies, but to me that’s less surprising than Emmrich’s reaction, in which he quickly interrupts and confirms Rook’s suspicions. He could just let Johanna supervillain ramble—so why not now?

During the events of the fic, they’re still close enough they’re sharing lichdom insights with one another, even though Emmrich is getting more unsettled about the lengths Johanna is willing to take to prove her theories and also the truths about the universe they’re discovering along the way. It’s also worth noting that Emmrich is an Associate Professor at this point in time and very desperate for Reasons to get that professorship (even though he’s still being very proper and Emmrich about it all).

Anyway, in the course of their adventures, there’s an Incident which causes Emmrich to freak out so much that he crumbles under pressure during the investigation into Johanna’s crimes, making the whole situation even worse.

Basically, while I still want Johanna to be Johanna—ambitious and ruthless and uncompromising in her goals—I want to also drown Emmrich in guilt. Not only because I enjoy making my faves suffer (although that’s certainly part of it), but I think it just works really well with the overarching Veilguard theme of regret. Emmrich already canonically wonders in his diary entry about whether he might have joined Johanna in his darkest moments, but I want him to also regret betraying her—not necessarily because she didn’t need to be stopped, but because of how (in my fic series, at least) she got so much worse after being excommunicated from her core support network. And even though he does try to reach out… well, that’s another fanfic all together.

4. What does your worldstate look like going into DAV?

7. Which character from the previous games or other media are you most hoping will make an appearance in DAV?

17. Are you interested in all the lore and speculation or do you focus more on the games and stories themselves?

4. You know, I had to break out the ol' spreadsheet for this one, to make sure I got the details right. For my 'ash in the sun' world state, we've got Warden Alistair and Brosca. Then Hawke was left in the Fade (she romanced Anders). Blackwall and Bethroot Cadash, who sided with the mages, supported Celene, who reconciled with Briala. Morrigan drank from the Well and Leliana is the Divine

7. Bethany or Carver Hawke! I know it will never happen, but it would make me so, so happy. I also really hope that Blackwall gets some sort of mention, though I doubt he will

Thank you so much, sweet, lovely Avi! (I still have to get used to @say-lene , lol) These are very good questions ;)

9 - Who wakes the other up in the middle of the night to tell them a cool dream they had? Who has the most nightmares, and who sings them back to sleep after?

Oh, Sara is definitely the kind of person who would make stupid and funny dreams, about unicorns eating steaks for example (don’t ask!), and she certainly would wake up a poor exhausted Reyes to tell him all about it!!

Reyes rarely remembers dreaming and has few nightmares. Even if he had, he would most likely keep it to himself. Sara… she doesn’t like to admit it, but she sleeps better when Reyes is with her. Whenever she has a nightmare, she simply crawls into his arms. She doesn’t wake him up, she just needs his presence and soon she can go back to sleep.

18 - Who talks to the other while they are sleeping?

Reyes. He doesn’t talk, actually, he’d be afraid to wake her up. But he just loves watching Sara sleeping, when she’s deep in her sleep and all the tension is gone from her face. He loves to stroke her face with gentle fingers or lay a sweet kiss on her forehead, and to see that it makes her smile even in her sleep. He’s soothed by those little moments.

19 - Who drives and who has the window seat?

answering questions about my wip list