Presents I got back from Lanzarote. Cheers, Mum! #tshirt #sarcasticcommentloading #ralphlauren #perfume

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Presents I got back from Lanzarote. Cheers, Mum! #tshirt #sarcasticcommentloading #ralphlauren #perfume

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Dat shirt and hoodie don't lie.. #SarcasticCommentLoading #FuckYou #Dabbbb
I wish real life could be more like a blooper reel.
sarcasticcommentloading
Cait: Have you heard of the Paleo Diet?
Me: Where you only eat dinosaurs and extinct ferns?
Cait: Exactly. Think of all the calories you save.
Excerpts from our chat tonight:
Cait: I'm trying really hard to think of the perfect thing to say. All that's coming to mind is "I'm really sorry," or "Oh, look, Coulson!"
:::
Me: L-O-L-A LOOOO-LA.
LO-LO-LO-LO-LOOOO-LA.
Cait: I can so hear Stark singing that every time Coulson drives up.
:::
Me: I AM DYING.
‎
Cait: Ohmygod, I'm dying, too.
Me: I enjoy sharing my pain.
Cait: Remember me as I was. Wait, no...remember me a lot cooler.
:::
Cait: Please tell me 'fergalicious' is not actually in the dictionary.
:::
Me: Yeah, ignore her.
Cait: Oh, I will. I will extra ignore her.
:::
Cait: Well...I enjoy the phrase 'gesticulating in frustration'.
Me: I'm gonna use it every day from now until the day I die.
:::
Cait: Fucking nuns, man.
:::
Cait: There is no subtlety. At all. This person wouldn't know subtle if it sat down next to them and was really obvious about it.

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matchesunderfoot replied to your post: matchesunderfoot replied to your post:...
I certainly don’t. I have a great aunt who makes me buy myself donuts every time I do her grocery shopping and it’s just like well they’re not going to disappear on their own. Also doing everything while dozing is like the only morning option.
Pretty much. I'm a disgustingly chipper person once I'm awake, but that can take a while. I don't usually come out of my room until then.
My sister, though...
Well, she doesn't really do chipper at all
so that doesn't count.
My sister and I are such sweethearts to each other, even over IM.
Me: Looooove yooooouuuu.
Me: Goodniiiiiiiight!
Sis: Tolerate you. Decent night.
[mess in hallway is impeding movement]
Me: That's inconvenient - clean it up.
My sister: Your face is inconvenient - clean that up.