#salemsgate

is it the one with the naked people and strap-ons

call him

Me: She wasn't listening, anyway.

Dacon: White people are contractually obligated not to listen to black people like us.

aw you're thinking about me

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

you might be harry potter in heaven. was I there

lolno

I distinctly remember the 7' tall supervisor from work being there and laughing when I asked if he was god

and I remember it was all taking place in an office building and we were eating gummy bears

and then my ghost or spirit or w/e went and found ron to get him to kill himself, but because I'm me I didn't just tell him I was harry I was like YOU FORGOT ABOUT ME ALREADY

oh i cant wait

what

you’re going to be disappointed

How I feel about him:Tyrion is the medieval fantasy version of me, but with more whoring around. On the other hand, before he met Shae, I can’t say I wouldn’t do the same idfk. Anyway, Tyrion reads all the damn time, is incredibly clever, and is the dictionary definition of sarcasm. HOW COULD I NOT LOVE HIM HE IS THE ME IN THE MIRROR BUT WITH BETTER CLOTHES AND A COOL SCAR

 All the people I ship him with: Shae.

 My Brotp: Tyrion/Bronn/Podrick. I mean how can you not. Also I really like the friendship (it seems like genuine friendship) between Tyrion and Varys. I could be wrong because I’m not too far into the books, but yeah. GRRRRREAT. I also like his scenes with Jon, especially on top of the wall omglol.

 Unpopular opinion:I don’t like how people are always sympathetic toward Sansa re: the wedding, but don’t give a fuck about Tyrion. Like, here’s this guy who is considered ‘grotesque’, and spends his life drinking and sleeping with whores as a defense mechanism (because that’s what that is). He finally finds someone who he falls in love with, and who loves him…and now he’s forced into a marriage with someone else - THE PERSON SHE SERVES - and now he can never actually be with her. But somehow this is not something anyone feels any empathy with? Are you serious?

Also it bugs me that Sansa’s objection to marrying him isn’t WELL THE LANNISTERS ARE DICKS I MEAN LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO MY FAMILY LOOK AT FUCKING JOFFREY…no, it’s that Tyrion is a dwarf and not very attractive like ~Loras~ never mind that Tyrion helped your brother ride horses again (which in all fairness she may not be aware of so) and that he’s done nothing but actually be nice to you on all ~4 occasions you’ve encountered him sigh