#sailingwinds

Right now is to

Feel your fingertips

Gently stroking my cheek

To have your calmness

Seep into my depths

And to fall asleep

On your chest to the

Thumping lullaby

Of your heart

The wind was tearing our trees apart

As we sat inside sharing a tightly packed

Bowl of insanity induced clarity

You laughed and laughed at me

And said I was the

Farthest thing from

Brave in the entire world

I think you

Forget sometimes

How I walked with my fathers ashes

Up to the alter

At sixteen

With two hundred people

Staring

I think you

Forget sometimes

That my favorite pair

Of red headphones you step on

Are special because it was

The last gift

I received from him

I don’t think you

Understand what it

Feels like

To wake up in

The middle of the

Night

Defenseless from your subconscious

Unable to breath

Water streaming down your face

Clutching your gut

I may squeal when I see a spider

And I might not be a fighter

I run away from most problems

But I think that I am

At least a little bit

Brave

Misplaced anger

Hatred boiling out of my pores

And spreading into

Everything I touch

I feel diseased

But this morning I watched

The sunrise at six forty two

And I heard a bird’s song

The beauty it held

Stirred something that

Had been dormant

For a good while

He Told me I have a higher calling

Like a man going into priesthood

He stared right into my eyes and

Called me out on my bullshit

And then he shed two tears and

I’ve never had such an honest

Conversation with a man

Who knew more about me than I’d

Ever dare to admit