this war was taking its toll. libra had known this would happen, had known from the moment they had been told that in order to protect their summoners, their usual contracts no longer mattered. what the king seemed to have forgotten was that the time to recharge was already limited as it was and that without the usual periods in between, they would run ragged before the war was over.

it was far from libra to complain about it — she liked her summoner, she did not want her to die — but stars, she was tripping over her own feet and without scorpio’s hand steadying her, she would have fallen as exhaustion hit her again and again as she faded from the human world to return into her realm.

no.

it was almost funny to think that once, the sign had been so much more complicated, but as so many other things, it had been … condensed as time had passed. gestures had become more efficient as they had been used over and over, she had gotten rid of anything that was not crucial, leaving only the bare bones. the soul, some might say, but … libra was bound to think differently about certain things.

leaning against scorpio’s shoulder, she exhaled. sorry. there was a little more energy in this word, a word she did not think she had worn out. didn’t mean to snap at you, she added as an afterthought as she closed her eyes and just allowed herself to be held, to be sheltered for a bit. her current summoner was not as bad as previous ones, but she always found it … difficult when her summoner did not respect that she was oath-bound not to be speak.

it was a --- temporary solution for a problem that would hopefully be just as temporary, this was what she kept telling those who were . . . uncomfortable with these close quarters but especially arche who longed for the wilds that were sprawling out at the back of the island. only that it was not safe for him to leave.

her thoughts became lighter with every step she took to close the distance between her and her beloved. she reached out for him, a smile settling onto her face. it was difficult to contemplate the unknown or worry about what the future might hold when she was this happy to see him --- as himself, not as what he had been made into.

“ you’re lucky that you’re cute,  darling, ” thalassa replied with a dramatic sigh as she stopped next to him, one arm around his waist, her head against his shoulder. she should  not  be surprised how seamlessly alexius fit into her family, each time when he returned from one of his travels, but it baffled her every time. sometimes, she could not help but berate herself — she should know, she should remember. he had always been nothing but supportive — never pushy, of course not, but never shy about letting her know that if she needed an additional pair of hands, she could find him in her corner.

there was a reason why she could see where those who called him  husband material  were coming from, especially considering that they did not even know half about it. there was no need for the entire neighbourhood to know about how  great  alexius had been when the entire house had fallen to the flu. but there were also reasons why she was in no hurry to put a ring on his finger.

slipping her hand into the back pocket of his jeans, she grinned as she looked at the dinner he had prepared. “ it smells delicious … and ayse will be overjoyed, she  really  likes cheese right now — i’m surprised she didn’t ask for any as a snack, ” she mused aloud as her grin softened into a fond smile. “ and — once again … are you sure that you don’t want to change the direction of your blog? you’d write a  wonderful  food blog, really. ”

she did not say that if he were to run a food blog, he would spend more time … in town. throughout their often unusual relationship  ( and god, it had taken them far too long to put a label on it ),  there had always been a certain … appeal to the independence it still afforded them both. however, she sometimes felt like it was losing its luster, especially when it was sunday and he was gone and there was not much to do for her thoughts but to circle around the empty spot in the living room he would usually occupy.

thalassa snorted as she watched him set the table, carefully remembering that ayse had a  favourite  glass this week. for someone who was perhaps truly not cut out for domestic life, alexius was doing a fine job. still, had someone told her ten years ago that she would be making dinner while he was setting the table, she would have either laughed or checked said someone for a concussion. the thought would not have been .. unwelcome, but it would have felt unrealistic.

because ten years ago, she had been at the height of her career, had only just learnt what her sister had done. and yes, she had  probably  loved alexius even then, but things had been … casual. texting every couple of days, meeting up whenever they were actually in the same city at the same time.

but then, naida  had  had to prove just how abysmal she was. and thalassa, well, there had been no way thalassa could have just let that slide. she had been merciful, she supposed, when she had not made a spectacle for the press out of this, but this kindness had been for juvia, not for naida. as far as she was concerned, it would be still too soon if she never had to speak to her sister ever again.

and so, things had changed. thalassa had changed, her understanding of the — thing with alexius had changed, too. had their relationship been as casual as it had seemed to be, he would not have accompanied her when she had tried to figure out what one had to buy for a child. it had been a confusing time and she would still not exactly call him the domestic type, but … the facts did not lie.

“ i can’t argue with that, ” she said as she reached for the spice rack — this food needed more spices — and her eyes were caught by the souvenirs he had brought back from his travels for her. “ neither am i, as you may recall. and yet, here we are. cooking an googling what kind of dog to buy. come here, i need a taste tester. ”

the entire realm was grieving. aries and libra were clinging to one another — their grief was the same, was different from all other grief; revati had lost a friend and scorpio had lost his partner, his love, but aries and libra had loved someone who had filled many roles for them. to them, aquarius had been a blend of close friend, older sister and perhaps even mother figure. cancer was distanced, but it was not like usually was — this time, he did not seem bored or uncaring, this time it seemed like the uncharted depths of his mind held a secret that he was not sharing. her son was hurting, too, the uncertainty weighing heavy on him and she hated, hated that did not know what to say to make his pain stop. there was no one who was unaffected by this, no one she did not feel sorrow for. she pitied leo, too, because it was so obvious he did not know what to do to fix any of this  ( and she was not even sure if it could be fixed )  but above all, she worried about scorpio.

when capricorn had been gone, when she had been sad and angry and then just furious, scorpio had been there  ( so had aquarius, but the thought only hurt ).  scorpio had been there, had helped her to keep it together when all she had wanted was a summoner powerful enough to track down the  scum  that was holding capricorn prisoner and  hurt  zoldeo, badly. many others had avoided her, had not wanted to get caught up in the vortex of her grief and her anger, but scorpio had been there, he had talked her down, he had held her until she had found a new sense of normal, one that was still laced with despair but not with as much suffering.

but in capricorn’s case, they had known his fate. and this had made a difference. revati had been able to dream about making zoldeo suffer  because  she had known that he was the one who had taken capricorn away. they knew nothing about what had become of aquarius; their king was silent, leo could only shrug when someone asked him and sagittarius said he did not remember anything about the time when his key was broken, which was not all that surprising; it had to be a traumatic experience.

and revati was despairing, once more, because her cousin’s head rested heavy against her shoulder and  there was nothing she could do.  there was nothing he could do, either. he was not supposed to ask his summoner about what had happened, he was supposed to keep it together and keep pretending that nothing bad had happened. revati thus concluded that their king had never loved anyone or anything. a troubling thought.

what she could do was support her cousin, to put her own grief aside and just hold him, drawing  hopefully  soothing circles onto his shoulder with her thumb and indulge in the  ( likely unhealthy )  hope that any moment now, aquarius would return. it was not much and her hope hurt, but short of demanding an explanation from their king and risking punishment for insubordination, there was nothing she could do.

a sigh as she pulled scopio closer and held him tight. “ i wish she was here, too, ” she said softly, her hands stilling now that she was talking. she was missing aquarius, too, but she was not naive; she knew that scorpio’s pain dwarfed hers. and this was alright, it did not make her grief any less valid. it just meant that she knew better than to make any of this about herself. “ as much as it pains me to see you, to see everyone like this, i think it puts pressure on our king, pressure to end his silence. even he must know that this state can’t be sustained that sooner or longer, someone will break. ”

( had she any money to bet, she would put it on leo, determined to bear the weight of this on his own, something that had never worked out for him in the past. )