#sabrselene

I am sorry if writing to you here is inappropriate. I didn’t know if texting was the best option, I am… I am unsure of where I stand and I do not want to cause any unnecessary complications for you. Even as I write this, I flick back and forth between confidence and hesitance. I am tired,   neach-dèanamh mapa, tired of foolishly hitting my sword against your walls in an unwarranted attack. I’m tired and I’m scared and of all the voices sounding like an avalanche of positivity all I notice is the missing soft rumble of yours. Are you there? I do not know if you will read this. Maybe this is a call into the empty night, but I am calling all the same. I am back in the hospital, they go back into my chest on Tuesday. I’m scared, I am not sure I can go through it again. Are you there?

9/17 Message:

I go into surgery tomorrow morning at 8. Will you come? I would like to see you. 

You’re not a complication in my life, if that’s what you’re saying, Selene. You’re a person I care about and if you want me there to support you through this, then I’ll be there. The past is the past, it’s shaped us into something new. We’ve both made our apologies and moved on and, at least on my end, an affection will always be there. You’re going to make it through this and, even if you feel like you lack the strength, you have people around you to be strong for you. When would you like me to come over? Would you like me to bring anything; books, the pocket watch I just finished fixing, or anything else?

selenemacsuainsabr‌:

What about a good book and the company of a friend?

selenemacsuainsabr:

Am I wrong?

I’m not mad at you, mo domhan, I’m just gutted I lost another person I care about. I can’t keep living stuck in place. We got off the ride at different times and I’m just working toward accepting that and accepting the consequences of not accepting that when you had already moved on...I'm not mad.

@selenemacsuainsabr

You will always have it, Bunny.

Hi! I wanted to ask if you wanted to go to lunch this week while I’m in town but I saw you might be going home?

30 June 2018

She is a maze of neon highways and desert plains Of lonely creatures singing for the summer rain And at the end of all your knees fall down to kneel Yeah it’s something in you always yearns for someone real

29 June 2018

Blow by blow Honest in every way I know You appear To face the decision I know you fear And if I recover Will you be my comfort Or it can be over Or we can just leave it here So pick any number Choose any color I've got the answer Open the envelope

28 June 2018

Darling I know, you only cry when you're alone Darling I know, you only laugh to keep it all in It's scaring the both of us, the things that we've seen The places we know we must go But I've only loved one person through all Don't need an apology to make it right I just need you as a whole

27 June 2018

I can't get there on my own You can't leave me here alone I'm just trying to do what's right Oh a man ain't a man 'less he's fought the fight I could never point you out Waste of space in a faceless crowd Tell me what I have to say If you know what's right, then you'll walk away When the walls come down When the walls come down When the walls come down When the walls come down One by one I've seen em fall Some just don't show up at all I'm just here to fight the fire Oh a man ain't a man 'less he has desire And the walls come down And the walls come down When the walls come down When the walls come down You tore out my heart And you threw it away The western girl with eastern eyes Took a wrong turn and found surprise awaits Now there's nothing in the way