#sabotager

Sometimes You Have To Kill Your Own Child

The Self-Sabotager is a illusive child that is born from the ruins and rubbish of a foundational relationship that is abusive, negative, dark, void of unconditional love and excessively narcissistic in nature. Such as the one between a daughter or son of parent(s) that display narcissistic personality disorder and who play life and love unstable, emotional and mental games and prey on the downfall and demolition of their offsprings.

If you continue to let it live and thrive in you, it will destroy you. You will never get a chance to live wholly and freely. So if you are ready to eliminate the Self-Sabotager in you, then call on the powers of Ma Kali (the dark mother goddess of destruction) to destroy this unwanted child. Abort it before it aborts you and all your efforts.

Here’s a letter I wrote to my SS on this Pisces Moon that carries the shadows of incompletion. Pisces moves towards completion, calling up the shadows that prevent us from ending things that we started or ones that simply need to be over! Use the Pisces Moon magic today. Write a letter to your SS, the time is ripe.

Dear Self-Sabotager,

I need you to know that I acknowledge and totally recognize you now. You have been running my life and spinning the wheels of my creative efforts since I allowed you one or two times. Now you are always appearing, thinking its a permanent pass. But it is not!!

Set in motion, you have gone with the wind over and over, throwing me of course, setting up roadblocks and laying out excuses that you made me think were real or relevant.

Here’s the thing…if I were to die today or tomorrow, would you be happy? Well, if I were to die today or tomorrow, I would be very sad that I never got to share my real real work more intimately and to establish my Venus means of earning money. I need to, I absolutely must, at least give it a try and see what happens. It is about sharing in an organized way and taking things to another level not the hiccuping of starting and stopping.

Self-Sabotager you always come up with the concern that I may not have an operating base or that something may happen to ruin things and that I would not be able to keep doing it with consistency because my life has been inconsistent. I understand!! But now I know the consistency within the inconsistency, the light within the dark, the beauty within the ugly. I am also aware that these were most likely the opportunities to 'serve ' rather than 'suffer' - that slipped between the moments. I now need to turn that thought around and take a leap in my favor.

So I must destroy you now. I have had the longest war with you for too long. I no longer desire to engage you any longer.  You are keeping me deformed. I must kill and bury you. Today is the day you lay to rest in peace.

Here is a pill that will help you sleep easily and permanently. You have served your time longer than necessary. Here…..swallow it with this water. Thank you for your existence. I know I won't miss you. We must now part at your death bed. By sunset you will be gone!

Good bye, Self-Sabotager…. Rest in Peace!!