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I started this yearssss ago right after watching s2 for the first time, and I never got around to finishing it lol might as well post it
Cue badass music for how I imagined the S3 finale to look like. I do think they should give Crowley a Molotov. As a treat
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s3 post-feral Enid
Someone has to have mentioned this before. There are probably 14+ metas about it. It's fairly obvious in retrospect, but of course if one isn't looking for it...tell me why the three babies in S1 and the bit about the Cowrie shell Nefertiti fooling fellow in s2 didn't hit me until today.
It had to be Aziraphale that went UP. He's the prestidigitator. I don't know what it will be, but S3 will have the cup trick somewhere.
Thinking about the glimpse of Bruce in the season 3 promo and the speculation that Louis and Lestat are going to kill him. If they do Lestat will be coming face to face with his own demons. Bruce is Magnus in another form; A monster he was unable to effectively warn Claudia about and one he was incapable of protecting her from. Confronting him could cause a landslide of emotion, forgotten memories, and trauma. It could be a catalyst, a wall breaking moment. And how would that also affect Louis? Would it change anything? Could it be what brings on the hallucinations of Magnus? (If that's what we're seeing in the promo.)
Sorry, this is a bit of a ramble.
What if Jesus heads to Earth because Aziraphale has been whinging about how much he misses Crowley the whole time. And he's tired of listening to that. So he goes to fetch him, so Az stops and they can be happy and he gets his peace.
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Anthropomorphic Personifications - a Prophecy (#1)
Prophecy #2
this is meta
āLook, that's why there's rules, understand? So that you think before you break 'em.ā [Terry Pratchett: Thief of Time]
Just in case Iām right, I put my prophecy below the cut and give a mild spoiler warning: S3 spoilers? Possibly?
Picture it:
Season 3 opens to sad wet cat Crowley who is suddenly and relentlessly harassed by nightingales sent by Aziraphale to the tune of "Close To You" by the Carpenters
Look, did I delude myself into thinking it was going to be a peak into 1941, part 3? Yes, you can bet your last penny I did. I was almost daydreaming, a picture so clear in my mind it was as if I had already seen it. Crowley in that dashing costume that is half the fandom's favourite, Aziraphale right by his side, both at te same distance of the camera, protectively reaching to each other, talking at the same time,Ā or maybe neither one is speaking, while looking behind the camera with expressions we would have So Much Fun analysing to Heaven and back (pun fully intended, sue me). Did the Nazi Zombies and Furfur come back to exact personal revenge? Was it another demon, coming after Crowley when he thought himself safe? Archangels, alerted by Aziraphale's miracle at the church? Is any of them holdind the proverbial checkov's gun that was mentioned in s2e4? And so on and so forth. You get the gist.
So yeah, I had very high standardsĀ relating how juicy the image was going to be. That said, am I disappointed? Not in the slightest. Because this is so fucking on brand with the show' s humour and writing style I'm face-palming over the screen. It contains multitudes and allows for so much speculating room that whatever pattern you might have seen in stills 1 & 2 could very well hold true.Ā Think about it: the image we have been given is so deceptively minimalistic it could fit EVERYWHERE. In the Job minisode we see Aziraphale going to heaven in that same lift, so it can still be a flashback, just in line with the scenes for 1 & 2.
Also, for the people saying that because in 1 Crowley was closer to the camera while in 2 Aziraphale was, they'd both be at the same distance; it's still possible, just not side by side in front of the lens. It's still entirely plausible that this image belongs to a scene where both are present: Aziraphale as the shadow we see over the door, therefore behind the camera, and Crowley behind the doors, technically in front of the camera, albeit out of view.
And and AND for the those who got their hopes up that it was going to be their infamous "we've come to a decision" declaration (because, you know, in 1 it is Crowley "speaking" through the "holy water" note and in 2 Aziraphale is straight-up speaking, declaring loudly, in fact; so 3 HAD to be both of them talking at the same time and it HAD to be something big) well, to that crowd, I'm rising this: what if they are talking to each other from each side of the closed lift doors? What if they are pulling some ridiculous loophole in such a way that Crowley is TeCHniCaLly not on Heaven's turf? After all, everybody and their mother know about their "partnership" by now, so what gives? What about the possibility of Crowley having sneaked into Heaven to rescue AziraphaleĀ in the past? There are so many possibilities to play with, just by assuming they followed the "rules" set in the former stills, just not the way we thought they would...
And as I was writing all of this I had to pause and chuckle because I was imagining this: empty Heaven hall, the lift sign pings yet the door isn't opening. Silence. From the other side, a rapping of knuckles over metal can be heard. It sounds suspiciouslly similar to the bass line at the beginning ofĀ Another one bites the dust. Tun tun tun tun-t-tun-t-tun. The camera pans in to the elevator door, a shadow approaching it until we the get The Shot TM. The rapping repeats. Before it can start a third time, the figure this side of the door speaks up, voice tense "I'm afraid we areĀ quiteĀ closed". A few seconds tick by before another voice emerges from behind the door "Angel, you need to come downstairs. Things are getting...you need toĀ seeĀ for yourself. What are you doing up here that's taking so long?". The first voice now sounds more rushed, but also softer, worried "What areĀ youĀ doing up here? I think I madeĀ quite clearĀ you wereĀ notĀ to come for me this time, no matter what happened." "Well, notĀ inĀ Heaven, am I now? Listen, you coming or not?". The being the shadow belongs to sighs deeply, weary, another second of silence passing before a snap can be heard. The lift doors finally open, the light pouring from inside blinding the camera *queue opening credits with the music*
MyĀ dolphinsĀ point is, it's going to beĀ hilariousĀ if (when) this still we are bemoaning so much turns out be part of an iconic a/or highly plot relevant scene, and if that is not exactly the kind of shenanigans this show has been pulling since day one, I don't know what is it.
