#ruroken

small note: had an eerie rush of inspo while listening to a random playlist help,,,, anyways this drabble's kind of self indulgent so have some soft kenshin bc that's who he rlly is dni if u prefer his hitokiri version more idc

HIMURA KENSHIN had always believed himself to be a man who'd always keep his emotions and inner turmoil under wraps at all times, opting to hide it all under the guise of a friendly smile or a stern look when facing his enemies.

Some often said it was almost creepy how calm he remained, even in the faces of those potential threats that could greatly harm him or his loved ones if the said man were to be reckless in how he treaded around those certain circumstances. Which often led him or his loved ones to come out of those said circumstances unharmed, all thanks to his quick thinking and meticulous movements.

And so, God help this poor man out—how is he, a former well-known cold-blooded killer, getting out of this situation after coming into a flooded series of realizations that could potentially put a strain on the close bond you both had with each other?

He didn't mean to. Truly, he didn't mean to let these harboring, yet selfish, feelings he had for you grow evermore.

And seeing as spring had finally dawned upon this place rather generously—as evident and clear with the way the petals continuously became one with the wind as they fell from the various cherry blossom trees standing tall alongside the narrow path and with the way the sun's morning light rays slipped past through the trees, casting an almost blinding hue against bare skin—

Himura Kenshin had only meant to take your invitation for a stroll outside as a means to spend more time together and to also admire the beautiful fruits of labor graciously given by nature as close companions—nothing more, nothing less.

Nothing more, nothing less, he reminded himself once more. His deep, adoring amethyst eyes still maintained their loving gaze on your rambling figure, nodding off continuously at whatever words fell from your lips with a content and genuine smile on his lips.

Content. Genuine. Those were two words the wanderer hadn't felt for a long while and thought he wouldn't feel again.

Not until your presence made itself known in his life, that is.

Kenshin, for once, unknowingly found himself distracted from everything else—not in a way that he was solely occupied with the dark thoughts clouding his mind as they usually did.

He had always been a listener, always preferring to be on the receiving end while leaving a few comments here and there, especially more so whenever it all came down to your never-ending ramblings.

And so, here he was: still nodding his head off and barely catching on to any of your words while he gratefully basked in the melodious and enthusiastic lilt of your voice. The vibration of your voice mouthing his ears off beside him filled him with so, so much undeserving warmth for someone like him.

His shorter frame walked alongside yours, down the same familiar narrow path he had gradually grown a fondness for. His footsteps subconsciously slowed down to match your leisurely and unhurried pace.

But even with his mind now free of those thoughts, another thought shortly came to his mind, filling him with the acquainted guilt that soon made itself at home inside him once more—but for a different cause.

An oh so incredibly greedy part of himself still couldn't help but long for more serene and simple moments with you like this.

For understandable reasons, the auburn-haired man had, since then, labeled you in his mind as someone he wouldn't mind coming home to every day.

Even with the guilt and the ever-burning hatred against himself gnawing relentlessly at his insides for the countless lives he had mercilessly stolen from others as the Hitokiri Battōsai, the amethyst-eyed man had long earnestly indulged himself in seeking refuge within your eyes, your face, your arms, your everything.

A sense of normalcy.

A feeling Kenshin had only ever known with Tomoe back then, and now with you.

Himura Kenshin wouldn't mind living his life somewhere far off from the town or in a humble village, being known to his fellow neighbors and the village kids he'd play around with as the married man living in the smallest shack up ahead.

Just as long as he could live that simple life with you beside him. Through hardships and trials, he couldn't picture anyone else beside him but you alone.

But alas, just as he reminded himself—nothing more, nothing less. He shouldn't have even put that thought into consideration, yet he often let his mind drift to it. He shouldn't. He just shouldn't.

However, all those promises of self-restraint were thrown out the window in an instant.

His steady breath stilled, his eyes widened, and his footsteps finally came to a halt.

There you stood once more, donning that same kimono he'd desperately hoped to see a glimpse of every single time. All out of the naïve thought that it would instantly be you every single time he caught a glimpse of its familiar, intricate pattern in a bustling crowd or even in a remote area.

Kenshin would've been almost speechless and lost in awe at the sight of you—with your hair falling down and beautifully framing the sides of your face, the wind suddenly picking up around you and briefly surrounding you with its comforting yet fleeting embrace of the petals, and your eyes looking back at him in wonder and curiosity—

If it weren't for the fact that he was quickly overcome with the abrupt realization that he had been too occupied staring at you and hadn't been responding to your concerned calls for the past few minutes, even as you paused in your steps, a small distance now standing between you two.

Kenshin blinked before his stunned expression softened almost instantly—exhaling a quiet chuckle beneath his breath as a small, loving smile settled shortly on his lips. The twinkle of his fondness and affection combined, all for your lonesome taking, returning in his deep violet pools once more.

He shook his head in a dismissive but reassuring manner before uttering, "Ah, forgive me, this one didn't mean to worry you, that I don't," he hummed lightly, his tone apologetic and almost dazed. "I was simply thinking… how beautiful this spring has become."

Yet he knew deep down to himself, Himura Kenshin certainly wasn't talking about the spring.

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