you lay back on one of them that was your's, a big blocky one that has a couple windmills on top of it laying on the ledge that covered the top of your front door. kicking your leg absentmindedly as ol nostalgia rings through you, you barely get this kinda alone time but talk bout the advantage's of dream bubbles and damara's nice descendant escorting you.

until you hear the grass crunch from under you. you could just ignore it, finally steal some time for yourself but that’s not how your gears work; damn rogue bullcrap. you open your colorless eyes and move to look over your left where your sitting and spot a blob of red and feel a weird sense of relief.

its none other then your groupies lead spokesman kankri vantas walkin around trying to find you from how he keeps looking to his sides. kankri’s...something alright. sure everyone complains bout how much he babbles on bout half baked facts, preachy, pushy, an angry lil firecracker; actually maybe that’s why he’s so angry.

oddly though your not around alot for those, you’ll eyeroll at somethings but otherwise he’s pretty chill around you. bonus he’s celibate so you finally have someone who won’t try hitting on you every time you breathe in their direction. also your a mutant like him so mutant bro’s unite you’d think, it was cool finding you weren’t the only ‘cullbait’ of the gang honestly.

you go to get up and stretch your wings and back a bit. you may aswell make a sick entrance. you go run two steps and jump, your falling for a few seconds and it has your adrenaline pump before your wings pick up their flapping and have you flying downward slowly.

you saw kankri see you with near panic but pretty neutral look, dude barely had any sorta reactions but that was alright if it meant you could spot the teeniest moment he’d be thrown off as you land on the grass softly five steps away from him.

“9h.” he replies as you snicker. “pretty s1ck r1ght?” “in y9ur ling9 yes 6ut i advice y9u t9 please try n9t t9 use it s9 l99sely especially ar9und th9se in medically unwell situati9ns.”

you rub behind your neck. “sorry. anyways wha’ up? pass1n by?” you notice a pile of papers in his arms, maybe he’s gonna go preaching to some of those new human ghosts maybe? your betting the dude with the pointy glasses will be a conflict to him if he does.

“9h n9 actually i came t9 find y9u.” he states and you perk up a bit. find you? “megid9′s descendant was kind en9ugh t9 esc9rt me here.” ah her, you really should’ve figured. you take a step or two closer lookin down to see him cause dude’s fuckin short. “yeah? uhhh alr1ght, well what’s up?”

he looks back to his papers almost, hesitant? kankri vantas nervous? tarnish the thought till he looks back up clearing his throat. “genetical uniqueness.” ...what? “what?” you ask as he continues. “genetical uniqueness in 9ne’s self is a kn9wn fact9r 9ne sees in an9ther that is a small step to a gr9wing infatuati9n in said individual whether it 6e aesthetical, physical or pers9nality wise.”

...you...you don’t know what’s going on. is he giving a lecture? seminar? on genetics? oh gog messiah’s dangit kankri may be your boy as you’ve called him before (not around him you know better) but man there’s only so much of him you can chill with until it starts getting to well, this point. you don’t stop him though cause kankri vantas never stops until he’s finished.

“s9me f9rms 9f genetical uniqueness c9uld c9me fr9m all 9f th9se and m9re. f9r example, an unc9mm9n s9cietal genetic that while n9t unc9mm9n can 6e seen as a f9rm of interest to s9me9ne and unique. whether freckles, hatchmarks or, wings perhaps.” your wings flap at that.

“9f c9urse t9 t9uch 9n the first three f9rms 9f attraction i mentioned if y9u d9n’t mind my reference 6ack t9 the su6jects at hand, an aesthetical attracti9n t9 certain f9rms 9f attire and style that differ’s fr9m 9ne’s 9wn can 6e an9ther. 9f c9urse this is entirely su6jective as n9 indivudals are the same 9n this manner h9wever 9pp9site’s attract seem t9 have m9re likelih99d t9 find 69nds in a multitude 9f ways. examples 9f this kind 9f su6ject is perhaps a rebel-esque design that c9rrelates t9 s9me a resistance t9 a c9nf9rma6le s9ciety with it’s 9wn strict regulati9ns and laws. s9mething like rigid and ripped attire 9r sharp disc9l9red hair c9uld 6e examples that 9ne wh9 while n9t p9ssibly sharing th9se designs with them finds inspiring t9 l99k t9.”

you look at your ripped jeans and vest. you...kinda still dont know what he’s going on about, but you keep listening.

“the sec9nd aspect, physical is 9n a similar subjectivity as while 9ne finds a physical aspect 9f s9me9ne attractive an9ther will n9t. h9wever physical attracti9n inv9lves s9me f9rm 9f the 9ther individuals 69dy they deem as p9tentiality t9 perhaps engage in a quadranted arrangement with said individual whether h9rns, fangs, a smile that gives a pleasant crease to their facial structure, their 69dy language when shy 9r excited, perhaps even height as acc9unta6le as studies sh9w a pred9minant interest in a taller partner for feelings of pr9tecti9n, sta6ility, 9r an9ther f9rm 9f 9pp9site’s attracting if the 9ther party isn’t their perceived interest’s 9wn height.”

you rub the back of your neck...nervously. your not dumb your getting some serious implications. you don’t wanna believe them, nah no way kankri’s celibate maybe he’s talking bout someone else? alotta their team has nice smiles and taller then him or dress ‘rebelistic’ as he calls it.

“lastly there’s attraction to pers9nality. m9st w9uld like a pers9nality they find in s9me f9rm similar t9 their 9wn t9 gain n9t 9nly m9re in c9mm9n t9 create a 69nd 6ut als9 as a starting part f9r c9mm9nality t9 make it easier t9 take the necessary steps. s9me h9wever may find attracti9n t9 a pers9nality that differs fr9m their 9wn. why is dependa6le 9n certain pers9nal aspects but m9st are 9ut of jeal9usy f9r seeing s9me9ne they are n9t, 9r perhaps admirati9n t9 have what they have 6ut cann9t 9r are una6le t9 yet due t9 their 9wn pers9nal reas9ns and s9 they try finding a partner wh9 has s9me 9f th9se aspects they cann9t harness. n9t in a c9ntr9lling way mind y9u n9r t9 use them 6ut due t9 a f9rm 9f admirati9n and interest.”

you nod as he perks up. “ah, ap9l9gies h9wever menti9ning quadrants earlier. they have a varying r9le in these f9rms 9f attracti9n 6ut i failed t9 reitterate this 6eing m9re 9pen t9 interpretati9n 9n any f9rm 9f quadrants i’m referring t9 as many 9f these examples in this thesis can 6e f9r any quadrant. als9 ap9l9gies f9r the menti9n 9f this su6ject due t9 y9ur recent 6reak fr9m y9ur matesprit i didn’t mean f9r any kind 9f harm t9 y9u 9n it.” “nah 1t’s okay 1 get 1t. 1′m f1ne.”

he nods going back to his papers, least it looks like he’s almost done. “thank y9u. n9w where was i? right. n9w many examples 9f pers9nality attracti9n vary fr9m pers9n t9 pers9n 6ut i shall use a hyp9thetical and keep in mind it’s 9nly hyp9thetical. perhaps s9me9ne is rather una6le to s9cialize with any f9rm 9f 9ther parties due t9 varying 9pp9site interests or 9stracizati9n fr9m said gr9up. perhaps they meet s9me9ne wh9, perhaps shares s9me f9rm 9f genetical uniqueness t9 them, perhaps als9 having similar experiences t9 what their shared s9ciety 9r even different s9cieties share similarities t9. b9th gr9w and act very differently due t9 h9w they react and are raised in said s9ciatal climate. while the first hyp9thetical partner gr9ws t9 6e m9re f9refr9nt and 9pen t9 their 9wn th9ughts that s9me find c9ntr9versial the sec9nd partner is pers9nally flexible with an exteri9r design and m9re positive pers9nality s9me find m9re likely t9 fl9ck t9 them m9re.”

he’s hiding behind his papers but you swear you saw those cheeks turning a tint of red. your blushing too but you don’t know if its the same as his. your pumpbiscuit is beating hard but you don’t know if its infatuation or anxiety.

“perhaps, when the first pers9n sees this they find themselves just as infatuated to make themself kn9wn t9 this pers9n due t9 their 9pen relia6ility. perhaps they als9 feel a f9rm 9f jeal9usy that they are unable t9 have the same people-friendly exteri9r t9 them and, wish they had that ability t9 d9 s9. may6e the 9ther seems, at least t9 the first individual, 9pen t9 them and what they have t9 say 9r are fine with spending time with them that has the first individual to sl9wly c9me t9 terms with their 9wn feelings 9n this pers9n. even, s9 far as t9 admit even with their 9wn pers9nal views 9f themselves and their 9wn 6eliefs, they may find them, expenda6le t9wards this individual.”

okay no the beating is anxiety now, this is WAY too much you see it all now and your...scared. your really scared now. he sighs and clears his throat again. “in c9nclusi9n i 6elieve these f9ur fact9r’s are likely c9mp9nants t9 6uild a f9rm 9f r9mantic attracti9n 9ne may find in an9ther. s9, what did y9u think 9f it?”

your horrified, your rubbing your arm nervously and trying to put on a smile for him. “1t’s...pretty good yeah. real conv1nc1ng.” you feel like such a douchebag right now getting nervous. your recent break with horrus was, okay shitty to say, but it was nice having a break from romance.

you know you know that’s really shitty, but you feel the need to put all you can in it and you get drained and can’t keep going sometimes. its like the break charges you up so then your back to giving him your all and it repeats. it sucks, but he loves you and you feel even more douchy at the idea of telling him you can’t do it anymore, ever, after yanking his chain for this long.

you...don’t want that for kankri. your at a 50% charge right now on romancing least flushed wise, you never tried the other quad’s before. what if he wants flushed? you can’t do that you’d lose him if you pulled what you do to horrus on him cause you really kinda, don’t know how to stop or talk about it. 

even then you don’t even know if your both broken up for good or what, you could end up with him again and then it’d be a damara situation and you don’t want kankri to be your next damara he keeps grudges way longer then her (which your surprised she tolerates you enough even with her grudge but you digress).

even then all he talked about felt, surface level. like everyone’s crush’s on you; except meenah which guess this means she’s the only one never to flirt with you now. damn it. still though he doesn’t even really know you, sure he could learn but, do you really want him to? learn about how much of a fraud you are? how all this is an act and you honestly have no fucking clue why anyone likes you? how you can’t be your own troll? gog he’d be so disappointed he goes on about trolls equalizing and needing their own rights to be their own troll but you can’t do that; not even for him probably.

point is: your shit at flushed and you don’t want kankri involved. you wanna give him those free feelings your classpect is supposed to do. hard part is, how’re you gonna let him down?

before you can think further he speaks up. “i’m glad y9u think s9. y9ur an excellent listener rufi9h i d9 genuinely appreciate it.” you see a twitch at the end of his lip and it pains you the fact he almost smiled. “perhaps we can have m9re 9f these meetups next time?” he asks taking a step to leave.

your surprised but kinda relieved too, least he’s not asking you out, but then again he’s also coming back sometime. meaning he might get more and more confident to actually pop the question your not ready to burst his bubble with your response with yet.

you smile though and wave at him. “ahah, sure sure 1′ll be here for 1t. or, we can meetup here?” he nods moving to look away as he walks off. “i will make n9te 9f that f9r 9ur next c9nversati9n. take care nitram.” he states, you watch as he gets more distant and vanishes in the forest.

This isn’t really written in the normal hc format but I hope that’s fine! Just sort’ve me word vomiting all over the page.

I personally headcanon Kankri having OCD so just imagine Rufioh having fun with that? Like not in a teasing way but in an “oh! let's make a game out of 1t! who can organ1ze the fastest!?” Just... Rufioh givin Kankri serotonin by actually having fun with cleaning instead of complaining like their other friends...? SOFT FOR THAT!!!! And another symptom of OCD is having difficulty with uncertainty and Rufioh just tells him “dude 1 get l1ke that too, 1nstead of worry1ng over 1t how about we just compla1n about bad soap operas and how stretched out the dramas are?” and after Kankri complains about how he shouldn’t say their bad he either agrees and calms down or he will just ask for some alone time to calm down. They got the healthy relationship thing down to a whole ass T and I’m here for it. 

Another hc but this time for dates: