“That’s none of your business, Lucas.”

“No?” He squints his eyes, clearly amused at their banter. “If there’s some guy out there trying to marry my wife I think it very much is my business, Riley.”

“You’re not going to make this easy on me, are you?” She sighs.

“Not a chance.”

 --- Seven Years Ago ---

The front porch stretched the entire frontage of the house. Riley could smell the rain as it hit the pavement of the street. She loved to sit there no matter what the weather was doing. For the days she couldn’t clear her mind she’d sit on the steps and stare out into the open fields. Nothing but grass and trees in front of her. She could sit back and watch the endless rain for hours. She could watch the world pass her by and that’s exactly what she did.

The sound of Lucas’ pickup truck pulling into the driveway breaks her train of thought, catching her attention. She watches him slug out of the truck, solemn look on his face as he grabs his bag from the seat and trudges over to her. The rain is so heavy he doesn’t notice her sitting there until he’s about a foot away. He stops in his path, lugging his bag onto the porch, crouching down to meet her eye level. “There’s a storm coming. What’re you doing out here?”

When she doesn’t answer he reaches out and places his hand on her knee. “Riley?” He uses his other hand to gently raise her chin, forcing her to look him in the eye. “What is it?”

Without uttering a single word she digs into her pocket and pulls out an already opened envelope. She hands it over to him, studying his facial expression as he slowly opens it and reads what’s inside. She watches his face go from confused to intrigued to distraught in a matter of seconds. And just like she feared, he doesn’t say anything. He walks past her, leaving her there on the porch.

She gives him a few minutes before following him inside. Standing by the door, she watches him plop down onto the sofa, running his hands through his hair in frustration. After what feels like forever, he looks up at her and angrily throws the envelope on the coffee table. “Why didn’t you tell me you were applying out of state?”

“I didn’t think I’d get in.” She admits although it was only half true.  In reality she wanted to spare his feelings because in her mind there was no way she would get accepted into an Ivy League university, especially one all the way in New York City. In her heart of hearts she felt she was destined to stay on that small ranch in that small town, never to venture out or leave. That’s what happened to everyone there. They all had false hope of one day leaving that small town and finding something better but no one actually ever did it. She knew she wasn’t the exception.

“But ya did.” He replies, a hardened look on his face. “So what now, Riles?”

“Well I checked and Cornell has an amazing Veterinary Medicine program, maybe you could transfer or apply next year.” She walks over feeling hopeful but the second his eyes meet hers she knows the conversation isn’t going to end well.

“Me? In New York?” He lets out a harsh laugh. “Riley I just barely got into A&M. I just started there. You want me to just up and leave?”

“Not if you don’t want to…”

“So then what exactly?” He stands to his feet, “You go off to Cornell and just leave me behind? We just got married.”

“I can’t stay here!” She snaps, her voice louder than she intended. “I want to do something with my life, I want to be somebody.”

“I want that for you too.” He defends, “but I also want you, Riley. I want us to work.”

“Why can’t we work in New York?” She crosses her arms, walking towards him.

“Because I don’t have the means to do that.” He drops his stance, bringing his hands up to gently caress her cheeks. “I can’t move to New York baby.”

She refused to look away, even as his lips trembled unwilling to back down. Her dark lashes brimmed heavy with tears as she reached up and softly pulled his hands away from her face.

A lone tear traced down his cheek as she said held his hands in hers until finally she said the words he feared she would one day utter. “I can’t stay.”

...

Lucas fell asleep on the couch that night, hoping that when he’d wake he’d see Riley dancing around in the kitchen like she always did every morning, or he’d hear her enthusiastically singing in the shower, the scent of her vanilla shampoo stuck in the air, but no. Instead he woke up to a cold empty house, no lights on, no music playing… just an empty feeling in the air and her wedding ring on the coffee table.

Underneath the ring was a bright pink post it note with only nine words scribbled across it.

‘I have to do this for me. Please understand.’

 ----

As she’s standing there she feels something soft rub up against her leg causing her stroll through memory lane to come to an abrupt end. She stares down at her feet as the small grey fur ball leaps up in front of her, making itself comfortable on the couch.

“Jellybean.” Riley smiles, bending at eye level with the cat, gently caressing the space between its pointy little ears. “Looking good for a cat your age.”

“That’s –“ Lucas pauses, when Riley meets his gaze again he sighs, “That’s not Jellybean.”

“Well where is h --.” She looks around until realization sets, “Oh…I’m sorry. He was a good cat.”

“He was mean as a snake.” Lucas chuckles softly, “Only ever really liked you.”

“When did he pass?” She asks feeling a pang of guilt throbbing through her chest.

“About a month after you left.” He answers quietly, “He was old when we got him…” He reminded her, knowing if she was still anything like the Riley he married, she would blame herself for the cat’s death. And he was right.

She did her best to hide her emotions but deep inside she hated herself for not being there for him. Jellybean was a scraggly little thing that followed her around like a puppy. Lucas would lock him out of their bedroom at night because whenever he left the door open he’d jump up on the bed and make himself comfortable between them, somehow hogging Riley to himself.

Lucas was sure the cat was pure evil but from the way it purred with delight whenever Riley would cuddle him she was positive he was an angel. Truth be told she thought about taking him with her that night, she knew Lucas and Jellybean didn’t get along but in the end she ended up leaving him there with him. A small dorm room was no place for a cat especially one that was used to the big acre of land it lived on. She knew the best thing for Jellybean would be to leave it there but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

“Seriously Riley.” Lucas speaks again, noticing her heartbroken expression. “He was just old. It wasn’t your fault.”

She clears her throat, feeling ridiculous for getting worked up about an animal she hadn’t seen in almost 8 years. “Um…so who’s this little guy then?” She smiles weakly at the small cat curled up in a ball on the sofa.

“No name.” He shrugs, “Just started showing up here about a week ago.”

“And you haven’t named him yet?” She raises an eyebrow, “I’m betting he practically lives here.”

“He comes and go as he pleases.” Lucas smiles but it quickly fades as the next sentence leave his lips, “Besides, you did the naming, remember?”

Riley stood up straight, exhaling a deep breath she hadn’t noticed she was holding in. She didn’t have enough patience to keep going back and forth with him. This had gone on too long and she was finally there in person to put an end to it. “What do you want Lucas?”

“Pardon?”

“Let’s negotiate.” She gets closer to him, feeling a surge of energy pulse through her body as they stand less than a foot away from each other.  “I need you to sign the papers so I can go back to my life in New York so tell me what it is that you want.”

Lucas wanted to answer truthfully. He wanted to say ‘you, you’re what I want’ but he knew it wouldn’t make a difference. Riley had made her mind up about him and her life there in Texas long ago and he had to respect that.

“This is really what you want?”

She hesitates longer than she should have. There was something about his eyes that made her feel unsure but she pushed that aside and stuck to her guns. “Yes.”

“Okay, fine.” He grabs his bag and keys off the counter and heads for the door. “We’re throwing your grandparents a surprise anniversary party this Sunday. That’s only three days from now. You stay and show up for them, I’ll sign your papers and you can be on your way.”

“That’s all?” She asks again just to be sure.