@royaiweek Day 6: Free-for-all
"Are you ever going to spend the night?" Roy asked her.
The streets were empty and the night was quiet. His question, breathed out in a whisper, seemed to ring all around them. But Riza had an answer ready.
"You wouldn't forgive me if I said yes."
"You don't even hesitate," he pouted.
"Am I supposed to act like a lovesick schoolgirl, sir?" Roy raised an eyebrow, and she blushed, catching his thought a bit too late. "Forget I said anything."
This was them. This was their life. Truth to be told, the temptation would have been much greater had Riza not found her own rhythm in the chaos. In another life, they could have led a quiet, easy existence. But more than once, Riza had wondered if that life would have suited them. Their blood boiled too fervently. One day, she'd opened her eyes and had found herself surrounded by those whom she loved. Friends, superiors and subordinates. Her dog, her grandfather, and the love of her life. And that day, Riza had known.
For all the demons in her closet, for all the pain and heartbreak and regrets, there was no point in living it with her heart closed. Her dreams were broken at the foundation. She'd been silly, arrogant. She'd been naive, even after she'd sworn off naivete. Her state of mind was a grain of sand in the relentless desert winds. It meant little. It changed nothing. It was a free-for-all without winners or losers. Riza could be miserable until her dying breath, or she could find peace in the path she had chosen. In the bigger picture, it was all the same.
But to Roy, it made all the difference. So as they walked back from their late dinner, Riza relaxed her shoulders and let his voice lure her into something like contentment. As they said goodnight, Riza held him close and didn't protest when he stole a kiss.
"Can I come up to see Hayate?"
"Nice try, sir." But upon seeing his hazy eyes, upon dwelling on his nonchalant insistence, her shoulders deflated. "Alright. I'll make us tea."
This was their life. There was no point in forgetting to live.
