#rowan oc

"I am, too." Rowan kissed his cheek.

He had to hold back a laugh at Rowan's desperation for affection. It was pathetic and made him feel disgusted, but it was also a tiny bit amusing. "Yeah, but I doubt you want to be treated like a cat."

Rowan raised an eyebrow and gave him a grin. "Are you offering? Because if you wanted, I wouldn't mind wearing a leash and--"

"Yeah, no. Not happening." Sawyer interrupted him before he could get any further. "Casper, want some food? C'mon, buddy." He picked up the cat and got off the bed. Casper mewled loudly and squirmed out of his grip. Sawyer placed him on the floor. "You got wet food too, right? Dry food only isn't very good for him."

He led the white fluffball to the kitchen. He heard the sound of Rowan following behind him.

Rowan chuckled. "I got whatever was the most expensive, so yes."

Of course he did.

"Alright." He searched the pantry and found several bags of cat food.

He picked up a can of wet food, the name of the brand sounding foreign and fancy, and poured it in Casper's dish. Casper immediately dug in.

"He eats so fast. Reminds me of my childhood cat." He watched Casper scarf the food down like he hadn't eaten in days, even though that was far from the case.

"I don't recall you mentioning a cat before," Rowan noted.

Sawyer frowned. He didn't even realize he had opened up to him, even if it was about something small. "Domino. He was a tuxedo cat, and very clingy. He would follow me everywhere I'd go."

Kind of like a certain someone.

Rowan walked around the island and wrapped his arms around his waist, kissing his shoulder blade. "I'm sure he was adorable." He paused, pressing his forehead between his shoulder blades. "What would you like for breakfast, love? I can cook anything you'd like. Pancakes? Eggs? Bacon? French toast?" Sawyer hesitated, and he continued. "Or would you like to try something else?"

"Just some eggs. I'm not too hungry. I'm gonna go take a shower," Sawyer told him.

"Of course." Rowan kissed the top of his head. "You know where to find me."

At least he didn't request to shower with him.

Sawyer made a quick trip to grab some clothes from their shared room. When he was inside the bathroom, he locked the door, feeling relief when the lock clicked in place.

Finally, some alone time, even though he knew it wouldn't be long.

He turned the faucet on and began to strip, folding his pajamas neatly and setting them aside on the counter.

As he waited for the water to heat up, he stared in the mirror. God, he looked awful. The dark bags under his eyes, his paler than normal complexion, and even the hollowness in his eyes, made him appear like a ghost.

He looked at the mark Rowan had branded into him. It still hurt to touch it, or to even look at it. Just a reminder this wasn't a nightmare he could wake from.

He sighed and turned to the shower. Steam fogged the mirror and Sawyer stepped in, shutting the curtain. He exhaled softly and tilted his head back, closing his eyes. He was so exhausted, he just wished this all would be over and he could sleep for an entire week.

Sawyer scrubbed his skin raw, trying to wash off the smell of Rowan.

No matter what he did, it still clung to his body, like a stain on his soul. He felt filthy and violated. The water burned his skin, turning his pale skin bright pink, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

Soon he finished his shower, turning the faucet off and stepping out, wrapping a towel around his waist.

The steam was still heavy in the room, the mirror covered in fog.

He dried off his hair and grabbed his clothing. A pair of sweatpants and a simple black shirt, something comfy. As much as he wanted to just collapse in the bed, he was hungry and Rowan would probably come looking for him soon.

He left the bathroom and walked down to the kitchen, the scent of scrambled eggs and toast filled his senses as he descended the stairs.

"--...are you sure? I'm not even home right now, just using the lake house, and it's pretty messy. Besides, aren't you guys busy?" he heard Rowan say.

Who was he talking to?

Sawyer made sure to be even more quiet than before as he neared the bottom step. Rowan had his phone to his ear, a concerned expression on his face.

"I don't know how I feel about it." Rowan hesitated. He leaned on the island table, drumming his fingers on the granite countertop. He glanced towards Sawyer. "Fine, okay. The twenty-fourth works fine. I know. I have to go, I have a boyfriend to take care of." He hung up, sighing and pocketing his phone, running a hand over his face. "Dammit."

Well, whoever it was, they knew about Sawyer's existence.

"Who was that?" he asked, entering the kitchen and sitting at the counter. His curiosity got the better of him.

Rowan didn't seem upset at him for eavesdropping, at least. "My sister. Her and my brother are visiting in a week."

"Your siblings are visiting?" He wasn't sure how to feel. On one hand, maybe he'd find help. On the other... who was to say they weren't just like Rowan? The man was already unstable, what if his entire family was like this too? "As in, here? Will I get to meet them?"

He tried to play it cool and not make it obvious that anxiety and hope were running through his veins.

"If you want to." Rowan set a plate of toast and scrambled eggs in front of Sawyer, kissing his head. "I'll make sure they're on their best behavior. Felicity is my older sister, she's a workaholic and tends to forget basic social etiquette, so she may seem standoffish. Griffin is my younger brother. He's... immature, but a sweetheart."

It was almost endearing to see he clearly liked his siblings. Sawyer wished he had a good relationship with his.

He had no idea if Rowan was being truthful about his family or not, but if they did visit, he hoped it meant he could finally leave.

It was a gamble, but he didn't have any other options at the moment.

"I wouldn't mind meeting them. Are they gonna be just visiting for a few hours, or staying longer?" He picked at his food in an effort to seem nonchalant.

Rowan shrugged. "They're much more spontaneous than I am, so I have no clue. With Felicity's schedule, I imagine she'll only want to stay for half a day. Griffin's employment situation is never stable, so when he invites himself over, it usually means he wants money. He doesn't always stick around, though."

Sawyer took a few bites, savoring the flavor, before speaking again. "You seem to care about them."

"Well, they're my family. Of course I do. Even when they annoy the hell out of me," Rowan chuckled. He wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "You're much easier to love, my sweet." He kissed the side of his neck, and Sawyer shuddered. He still hated Rowan, and being reminded of that fact every time he felt his hot breath on his skin was infuriating. "I'm excited to introduce you to them. They've been dying to meet you, you know."

"They have?"

He laughed and pulled away. "Of course! I haven't shut up about you for months now. They just can't wait to put a face to the name."

"Oh," was all he said. He didn't know what else to say. "Do you... uh, tell them everything? You know... like..." Sawyer trailed off.

Surely they wouldn't approve of their brother being a deranged kidnapper.

If he did, that was a red flag for the whole damn family, not just Rowan. He hoped they were sane enough to realize their brother was in need of serious professional help.

"I'm not that much of an oversharer." Rowan sipped on his orange juice, then gave him a stern look. "Which means if they ask, we've been dating for over a year. If you say anything to them about how you really got here..." He let the silence sink in.

He didn't even need to say what would happen, because Sawyer knew it wouldn't be anything good.

"I won't." Sawyer looked down at his food. He didn't want to test Rowan, not now. Not after last time. He was terrified of the idea of him lashing out. Rowan had been gentle with him so far, and he didn't want to ruin the temporary peace.

"Good boy." Sawyer shuddered at the praise. "Now eat, before it gets cold."

...

The next few days were uneventful, but Sawyer did everything in his power to be as perfect as possible for Rowan. Even the little things seemed to make him ecstatic.

Just doing simple acts of domesticity like washing dishes and making the bed had Rowan practically worship him with kisses. Not that Sawyer liked that even in the slightest, but it did help keep Rowan happy.

Rowan was so easy to manipulate, and that was Sawyer's only source of entertainment.

He had to find amusement somewhere, considering how often Rowan was busy working on his laptop and he had no access to television.

Casper was the only thing keeping Sawyer sane at this point.

"They should be here any minute," Rowan mumbled to himself. Sawyer looked at the clock on the wall, it read 3:45 P.M.

Rowan paced around the room, wringing his hands. He was clearly nervous. Sawyer didn't understand, but it was entertaining seeing him squirm like this.

He had been acting antsy ever since this morning. "Are you ready?"

Sawyer almost huffed in annoyance. "Yes. Why are you so nervous?"

"It's been a while since we've seen each other, that's all." Rowan stopped pacing to stare out the window. "I hope the roads aren't frozen over. Maybe I should've picked them up at the airport..."

His anxious ramblings were begging to really get on Sawyer's nerves. He swallowed his pride and approached him. He wrapped his arms around Rowan's waist from behind. Rowan's shoulders slumped, relaxing.

"Everything is fine, baby." The pet name tasted rotten on Sawyer's tongue. He had to hold back a gag.

He was glad Rowan was facing the other direction so he couldn't see the disgust on his face. He didn't sound too convincing either. He was trying, but he didn't have experience comforting someone, nor had he been comforted much in the past.

"Thank you," he muttered, turning around and pressing his nose into his hair. Sawyer didn't reply, letting his arms hang limply at his sides.

Sawyer felt a flash of adoration for him. Not in the romantic sense, but the kind you'd get when looking at an endearingly pathetic puppy.

He couldn't believe how whipped Rowan was for him, how much power Sawyer had over him.

In a brief moment of impulsivity, Sawyer cupped his face and stood on his toes to kiss Rowan, who melted under his touch. He was desperate for the smallest bit of affection he could get, like a dehydrated man crawling through the desert for a single drop of water.

He didn't have time to process his mistake when he saw Rowan's blissed out expression.

It was almost as if Rowan forgot why they were standing at the doorway. He pushed Sawyer against the wall and pressed their bodies close.

Just before he could get too excited, there was a knock at the door. Sawyer breathed a sigh of relief. Saved by the bell.

"Coming!" Rowan yelled as he pulled away from him. He straightened out his shirt and flattened his hair before opening the front door. "Felicity, Griffin," he greeted, opening his arms. A woman and a man, who were obviously his siblings, hugged him. Sawyer awkwardly hung back and watched them. "It's so nice to see you two."

Griffin pushed past him to see Sawyer. He had messy light brown hair, a small stubbled beard, and black stud earrings. He was a good looking young man, a lot shorter than Rowan was and much leaner.

"Holy shit! Is that him? Sawyer?" he gasped, grabbing his hand and shaking it enthusiastically. "Dude! I've been dying to meet you!"

Never would Sawyer have guessed him and Rowan were related, by appearance or personality. "Uh, hi. Nice to meet you too," Sawyer responded awkwardly.

It felt so weird getting to talk to someone that wasn't Rowan.

Part of him liked not having to talk to strangers every day. He always felt uncomfortable meeting new people, but this was the first time he wished he could just go out and talk to others for once.

"Griffin," the woman scolded, and Griffin let go. She sighed and looked at him, brushing a strand of hair from her eyes. "Sorry about that, he's an excitable type. I'm Felicity. It's nice to finally meet you."

She resembled Rowan the most. Her hair and eyes were slightly darker and she wore glasses, but he could see the resemblance.

"Sawyer. You know that already, but it's nice to meet you as well. Rowan has told me a lot about both of you," Sawyer replied, forcing a smile. It was easy to mask his discomfort and 'odd' demeanor, but now it was harder to keep it up.

He was on edge and didn't know if they were going to hurt him or help him. It was nerve-wracking.

Griffin snorted. "Not shocked. Rowan loves some good gossip."

Rowan scoffed and closed the door. "Oh, shut it." Griffin and Felicity removed their shoes, and then their coats. "Make yourselves comfortable," Rowan insisted as he hung up their winter clothing.

They had suitcases, Sawyer noted. Great.

Yet maybe that was for the best. It meant he was in no rush to tell them everything. He could afford to be patient. It'd be hard to get alone with either of them with how overbearing Rowan was, but if he played his cards right, maybe he could escape this nightmare.

The thought alone sent a rush of adrenaline through him, but he was quick to compose himself before Rowan could notice.

Felicity let out a noise of surprise when she felt something rub against her leg. "Oh, a cat. I thought you didn't like animals." She glanced at Rowan.

"I don't mind cats as much as I do other animals," Rowan corrected her, "and he's Sawyer's."

Just a bribe to keep him docile, more like it. Sawyer kept his mouth shut nonetheless, watching Griffin kneel down and pet Casper.

"Oh, what a pretty kitty!" Griffin grinned when he started to purr. "Does he have a name?"

"His name's Casper." Sawyer was glad for the distraction of having a pet, because at least now they weren't staring at him. He didn't like being the center of attention.

He sat on the couch beside Griffin, keeping enough space between them. Rowan and Felicity sat across from them. Casper was content to soak in all the attention.

Griffin glanced up at Sawyer. "I never thought my brother would be able to keep a relationship for more than a month, let alone have someone living with him. How did you guys meet?"

Rowan looked offended. "Wow, rude."

Sawyer nervously laughed. "We met at a club I used to work at." Rowan nodded approvingly. He didn't dare stray from the story. "It took a while, but we grew closer and he asked me on a date."

He hoped the story would sound vaguely familiar to them.

Even though he imagined his disappearance wasn't labelled as a big deal, they must've heard something about it... right?

"Oh, that's cool. Didn't think Rowan would ever voluntarily go clubbing." Griffin laughed and scratched under the cat's chin. "I guess you already know by now, but he's not the fun type."

"I am fun, just in a more refined way." Rowan rolled his eyes and sipped on his tea. "Sawyer and I have plenty of fun together."

"TMI." Griffin faked a gag. "I didn't need to hear that."

"I meant our dates! We have plenty of fun on dates, get your mind out of the gutter," he shot back. Griffin stuck his tongue out and Felicity sighed.

"Can you two act your ages, please? It's embarrassing watching two adults bicker like children." Felicity pinched the bridge of her nose. "Sorry, Sawyer. They seem to regress to toddlers when together."

"I've learned to tune him out," he joked, glancing at Rowan.

Felicity chuckled. "You and me both."

"I don't remember signing up for 'Gang Up On Rowan Day'," Rowan complained.

Griffin snickered. "That's every day."

Rowan rolled his eyes and looked away from him, his gaze falling on Felicity instead. "Anyway, how long are you staying?"

Felicity sighed. "Only until tomorrow afternoon, unfortunately. I'm going on a business trip and need to get ready, so I won't be able to stick around for very long." She smiled at Sawyer apologetically. "Sorry."

"Oh. I understand," Sawyer responded, though he was a little bummed out. That wasn't a lot of time for him to find the right moment to beg for her to help. "It happens."

"Griff will be staying a bit longer," she assured. Griffin perked up when he heard his name.

"I'm gonna be staying here until Monday, but I'll need a ride back to the airport, if that's okay, Ro." Rowan sighed and nodded, though his irritation was obvious. Sawyer bit back a snort. He wondered how he could use this situation to his advantage. "Sweet. Thanks." He turned his attention back to the cat, who was content in his lap.

"I'm going to make some dinner, I'll let you know when it's done." Rowan stood. "Sawyer, darling, can you help?"

Sawyer bit back an annoyed retort and nodded. "Yeah." He got to his feet and followed him. He knew Rowan wanted him around just to keep an eye on him, as if Sawyer could escape easily with these two.

Rowan led him into the kitchen and grabbed some ingredients from the fridge and pantry, setting them down on the counter. He handed Sawyer a bag of pasta and pointed at the sink.

Sawyer got the hint, filling the large pot he grabbed with water and setting it on the stove to boil.

"Did I do something to upset you?" Sawyer questioned, looking up at Rowan. "Why did you need my help?" Rowan raised his eyebrow at the inquiry, but Sawyer kept talking. "I mean, you usually make everything by yourself, so why now?" He didn't mean for it to come out as rude.

"Am I not allowed to spend time with my love? I haven't been giving you much attention since this morning. I wanted to make it up to you." He kissed Sawyer on his temple.

He tried to push back the nausea he felt when he heard those words. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be so paranoid, I guess just being around people makes me on edge. They're really sweet though."

Pity was one of the ways to get to Rowan, he found. If he could play on his insecurities, it'd be easier to keep him from suspecting anything.

"Of course, sweetheart. I'll try to help with that." He kissed the top of his head.

When the food finished cooking, they ate at the dinner table. The silence was tense, at least for Sawyer. He had to fight the urge to tap his fingers against the wooden table in boredom.

Rowan, Griffin, and Felicity chatted idly about their lives. He didn't pay much attention. It was hard for him to make small talk, so he mostly listened.

He could only imagine what Rowan had told them about their 'relationship' and it made him sick.

Since they clearly were close, were they at least aware of Rowan's true colors? They seemed to not suspect him, but he couldn't help but wonder.

Griffin did make a few comments that might have suggested that, but he couldn't tell if he was just teasing him or if they held any weight.

"So," Rowan started, looking at his brother, "what have you been doing lately, Griffin? How's that band of yours going?"

He was in a band? Sawyer suddenly grew interested.

"Oh! We've actually gotten a lot more recognition recently, we even have a gig at the end of this month." He puffed out his chest in pride. "I hope that it'll make me enough money that I can quit my job and focus on it. I almost got kicked out of my apartment for being two months late on rent. My landlord is such an asshole, she never cuts me a break."

"She's only doing her job," Felicity interjected.

Griffin groaned. "Of course you'd be the one to defend a landlord. You're rich. Even Rowan would be more sympathetic. Wouldn't you?" He looked at Rowan expectantly.

Rowan nodded. "I hate landlords as much as any sane person, but you don't exactly make it easy on yourself. How much do you have in savings? Please tell me you didn't spend it all like the last time I loaned you some." He didn't answer, but his grimace gave him away. "You did. Again. I can't defend you on this, Griffin. It's on you to take care of your bills."

"I know, I know," Griffin sighed. "Maybe I'll do what Sawyer's doing and just get with a rich guy."

Felicity's mouth twitched downward. "Griffin. That's incredibly rude. I'm so sorry, Sawyer."

Sawyer shook his head. "I'm not offended. In this day in age, you gotta do what you need to survive."

If Sawyer knew Rowan was wealthy before he kidnapped him, he might've gotten with him on his own free-will. He couldn't even take advantage of Rowan's money because he wasn't even allowed to go shopping.

All the money in the world didn't mean shit if he was just going to be stuck here.

Griffin smirked. "He's a keeper, Rowan." He turned to Sawyer and said in a more hushed tone, "If you and Rowan break up, hit me up." Rowan kicked him from underneath the table. "I was joking!"

"I can't believe I share DNA with you," Rowan grumbled. "Changing the subject. How has the business been, Felicity?"

Felicity perked up. "Ah, I'm glad you asked. We just got a contract signed with a company that has the potential to be huge for our business. It's the largest we've ever gotten. If we play our cards right, we can expand and open a branch on the east coast." She wiped her mouth with her napkin and set it back on the table. "I'm so excited to go, even if I hate traveling. It'll be so rewarding."

"That's amazing! I'm glad to see your business is doing so well. You've always had a good business sense," he complimented, taking a sip of his drink.

Sawyer hesitated, then addressed Griffin. "You said you were in a band? What do you do?" He hoped he wasn't intruding or interrupting, but he figured Rowan couldn't blame him for wanting to join the conversation.

"Oh! I'm the guitarist," he answered with a smile. "It's called 'The Faded Roses'. You heard of it?" Sawyer shook his head. "It's no surprise. We've only become well known locally, but I think we've got potential." He seemed happy to have someone show an interest in him. "What did you do before dating my brother? You have to be bored with how much time he works. Almost as much as Fel."

"I was a singer. Mostly at jazz clubs or bars, nothing big," he replied.

Griffin lit up. "Oh, right! You mentioned working at a club. Maybe you could join us sometime? I'm not sure if we'll ever do any jazz numbers, but we're open to trying anything."

Sawyer doubted that'd happen anytime soon, considering his situation. Still, he nodded. "That sounds fun, I might take you up on that offer sometime."

The lie left a sour taste on his tongue. He wished it was the truth. It felt so surreal to talk to others after months of isolation, it was nice to feel normal for once.

Rowan was quiet during their interaction, though he didn't look too happy. Sawyer couldn't tell if it was jealousy or suspicion.

Considering Rowan could get jealous of a cat, Sawyer wouldn't be surprised.

Felicity stood and took her dish to the sink, washing it and setting it down. "Thanks for dinner. I'm going to head to bed early, I have an early morning. Goodnight everyone." She walked off to her room upstairs without waiting for a reply.

"It's barely eight o'clock," Rowan noted.

"She's no fun, don't mind her," Griffin told him with a dismissive wave.

Sawyer didn't respond. He stood up as well and grabbed both his and Rowan's plates. He wasn't sure how to act around these two.

It felt strange, as if he were an animal in a zoo and was being observed by these strangers.

"You don't need to do that, sweetheart. Go sit down, I can take care of it," Rowan assured. He placed a hand over his own, rubbing his knuckles with his thumb.

It was as if he could read Sawyer's nerves. It was both a comfort and a source of fear, to have his thoughts laid out on a silver platter. Rowan was always watching and always knew what was on his mind.

He shook his head. "It's okay. You made the food, after all."

Sawyer could see the gratitude on his face as Rowan pulled away. Griffin's eyes were on him, but Sawyer tried not to think much of it. Maybe he was reading into it too much. Sawyer was never the type to seek attention. It just wasn't in his nature.

However, the lack of personal connection over the last several months was driving him crazy. He was desperate for human interaction. Just because he wasn't a social butterfly didn't mean he could be isolated without it having consequences on his psyche.

He was quick to finish cleaning, wiping down the counter with a wet rag and then wringing it dry. When he was satisfied with his work, he walked back to Rowan and Griffin, who were in the living room.

Rowan patted his lap. Sawyer almost scowled. Was he being serious?

Sawyer didn't want to argue with him or test Rowan's temper. He was already stressed out enough, so instead, he just complied.

He sat down in his lap and Rowan wrapped his arms around him, pressing his chest against his back. Sawyer couldn't tell if Rowan was just being clingy, or using it as a reminder to not get any ideas of escape. It was uncomfortable, but he couldn't complain about it.

"What were you talking about?" Sawyer questioned, hoping his voice didn't sound strained. It felt like a python was constricting his chest.

"Christmas is coming up, so I was telling Rowan how you should come to the family get-together." Griffin smiled. "It'd be awesome to have you around more often. Rowan has kept you to himself."

"It's a bit far," Rowan responded, rubbing Sawyer's shoulders. "Plus Sawyer has some pretty bad agoraphobia." Sawyer forced himself to nod in agreement.

Griffin smiled innocently. "It'll only be for a few days. Surely he'll be alright?"

He could feel Rowan's grip on his waist tightening. "He gets really anxious about going anywhere." His voice had a defensive bite to it. "Besides, he's a very shy person, and meeting the entire family might be a bit overwhelming. You know how Aunt Jessie can get. Always asking inappropriate questions and getting too deep into others' business."

"I guess." Griffin didn't look too pleased, but he dropped it. "Still, you should really think about it."

Sawyer knew there was a way he could use this to his advantage, but it was difficult to figure it out while Rowan was practically breathing down his neck. It was hard to come up with a convincing lie when he had no time to prepare.

"Anyway, I'm gonna head to bed. See you two lovebirds tomorrow." Griffin got off the couch and went to the guest room. "Night."

"Goodnight." Sawyer waved and watched him walk away. When Griffin was out of earshot, Sawyer looked at Rowan. "Why didn't you say yes to going?"

He had a feeling he already knew the answer. He wanted to escape this place, and maybe going would give him a chance at freedom. Even if it meant meeting the rest of his insane family.

"The rest of my family aren't exactly... well, I don't want to expose you to that type of behavior. You've been through a lot. Besides that, I was hoping to celebrate our first Christmas together alone."

Sawyer frowned. "I don't even celebrate Christmas, so it's not like it has any big meaning to me."

"Neither do I," Rowan replied, "I was thinking of it more of a 'couple' thing. Celebrating together, any holiday at all." He kissed Sawyer's cheek, who didn't even bother hiding his disgust this time. "I think it's uncharacteristic of you to want to meet more of my family. You hate people."

He had him there. "I just... want to go somewhere different. I'm sick of being cooped up. It'd be good to get out for once, don't you think?" he tried, hoping Rowan would see his logic. The silence between them made him uneasy, but he didn't want to press him more in case he got angry. If he didn't agree, it'd just make him more urgent to notify Griffin or Felicity about the situation. "Can you just think about it?"

"Alright. I'll think about it," he conceded, resting his head on his shoulder. "We should start getting ready for bed ourselves."

Sawyer nodded and stood up, stretching his limbs. Rowan followed behind him, keeping a hand on his lower back. They changed into their sleepwear after brushing their teeth, and Rowan pulled the shorter man onto the bed with him.

He pressed a kiss to his forehead, pulling Sawyer's body closer to his chest. "I love you so much. So, so much." His words sounded half-delirious.

Sawyer pretended to already be asleep so he would feel less guilty for not saying it back.

...

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