#rop rant

Since we're all discussing Celeborn anyway. One thing I always wanted to say is that I generally enjoy Haladriel fanfics where his existence is basically ignored.

It's not that I mind his character per se or that I think Galadriel cannot choose Sauron over him if he is around, but generally when he is included in a Haladriel fic he is made so absolutely unappealing and awful that of course you want her to dump him and hook up with Hot Sauron instead.

I start feeling bad for the fictional guy. And I know I shouldn't care but what's worse is that a lot of the fics describe him in ways that may or may not apply to me so I'm almost doubly offended and insecure when I come across that🤣

I think the problem is that he literally has no character in canon. In ROP he is barely mentioned. There is no reason to include him in a story that is about Galadriel and Sauron's rivalry or romance, it's just extra weight. It only kind of makes sense (for me) if you go for a threesome Gal/Celeborn/Sauron triangle.

I think it would be funny if ROP just never bothered including Celeborn on screen and just shrugged their shoulders. Just as funny as Elrond and Galadriel smooching or the show putting Tom Bombadil and Gandalf in Rhun during the second age.

I’m not an angry person. I know that’s laughable given my rants of late,😂 but I swear I’m not. 

I have this policy that I don’t waste anger on stuff that doesn’t matter, that I don’t truly care about. So before I put this show to rest, I want to defend why I think I SHOULD get angry with this show, and why others should, too.

I am angry because I am not a mindless troll. I am not a prejudiced bigot who is looking to join a torch-toting mob of hate, despite the fact that every article covering this show will swear that I am. All negative criticism is flung by the wayside and dismissed in an effort to keep afloat a bloated ship peddling steaming manure, and that makes me angry. 

I am angry because an artist I love has had his work mutilated. Not just in form but in spirit.

Let me put it this way: I feel like I have watched a hack of a sculptor buy the statue of David. He takes it home and decides he just wants David’s head, so he breaks it off. He sticks it on a body he’s carved out of limestone, melding the two with glue and bolts twisted into the marble. He tries to make the neck flow into the body of a different material, but the lines are painfully obvious. Also, he’s not a fan of David’s hair, so he chisels away the intricate curls and throws a hat on top.

This is what I feel like I have witnessed, and it makes me want to weep. Tolkien is not only unable to defend his own work, but he EXPLICITLY made his opinions known about adaptations of it. I hate the ruination of beauty. I hate waste, especially waste of potential. And most of all, I hate the evil that this show represents - the evil of greed and corruption and selfishness.

This is why I am angry.