#rmdreams

And yesss, honestly I love the more angstier/emptional scenes, I think it brings a lot of light to how characters work and react differently and gives so much more depth to them, seeing yoongi get so distressed and upset when the reader doesn’t recognise him is such a harsh difference to how we see him on a surface level, it’s almost unbelievable, for both readers and yoongi himself as he didn’t even know he was crying and was acting on isntinct (?). Also on a side note I love how emotionally complex you make Seokjin and how there’s both a subtle element of snideness and a deeper fear/sadness to him that you get small glimpses at, honestly at this point I’m full on simping for you and your writing, you’re so talented and the amount of energy and work you put into your fics is unlike any writer I’ve ever seen 💕

oh you have no idea how much I relate to you like- my double d’s will never fit into a binder and part of the reason why I haven’t bought one is cuz I know it’s just...not going to make me look the way I want no matter what I do. I'm never going to be perceived as male as much as I want to be- and there's always the like “will i be more loved in the body I was given? instead of trying to have the body I need to not feel this way?” I think that- is above all else why I am jealous of hoseok’s charter in ofal because they don’t have to wonder like- they are loved and they get to have it. both of us will probably be jelly for a long time over that tbh

I definitely wanted to keep like- the base level of what we know about the boy’s as people- like the actual bts in their lives and apply that to a story like- we know yoongi often hides his emotions behind an iron wall and I really really wanted to write him and their love story like- sometimes you love someone so much you can’t see how you’re hurting them? and I think when Jungkook and hoseok find him on the outskirts- that's what he’s really thinking about.

It’s also so sad to see both the reader and Yoongi slowly lose a little bit of themselves every year, the nightmares the readers getting seem so jarring for her

I know it might seem hopeless- but I think if you look for the people who will love you- you’ll find them who will do it in all your forms. found families > families by blood anyway. I think that growing into your body is a process- the same way hoseok is growing into theirs in the story- we all have to figure out the little things that make us feel not so terrible even if we can’t get those through love. 

one little thing that I do that makes me feel a little bit better is wear miss-matched earrings- I know it’s a small thing but I have these soft pearls in one ear most days and then a very industrial jimin/Jungkook bars in the other- and it kinda allows me to feel more like- balanced? maybe you could try something like that?