May 20, 2022
A very small sample of the shit my boyfriend puts up with while I work the night shift
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A very small sample of the shit my boyfriend puts up with while I work the night shift
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Me: All bread is good
My Friend: I don't know if that's strictly true I'm-
Me: *tears up*
Friend: Oh shit I take it back I take it back all bread is good
My Brother: Oh no, don’t bring a haunted doll into this house
Me: No don’t worry, I’m going to behead her
my dad: hey i'm going shopping do you want me to pick you up something for dinner at the store?
me: ...
me: can i please have a lunchable
dad: ...
dad: are the pizza ones still your favorite?
me: i would die for you
I’m embarrassed <3
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Floormate (who is totally plastered): i just feel like some people get drunk a little Too often, y'know?
Me, joking: you're one to talk, huh buddy?
Floormate: haha i get what you mean, but seriously i only drink on the weekends
Me: i mean...are you not drunk right now?
Floormate: oh yeah i'm totally wasted
Me: are you aware that it's a thursday right now and therefore not the weekend?
Floormate: wait it's thursday?
So I used to always call atla my favorite anime to annoy my brother except yesterday we started rewatching teen titans and so I was llike “ohhh now This is my favorite anime“
to, again, annoy him
except I accidentally said amine instead
so now he keeps going “hey wanna watch some more amine?”
if it isnt the consequences of my own actions
Me: okay so Theoretically could you see a family of cannibals who like, mount the heads of the people they eat, like how hunters mount the heads of animals they kill as like a trophy
My brother: yeah that totally makes sense
Brother: wait or actually rather than a trophy i could see them doing more of the "use every part" thing, right, so maybe like making a coatrack out of arms or something
Brother: that's an off the Cuff example
Me: *wheezes*