Jun 16
life is so stinky poop right now. i don’t even know how to wait for things to get better i am just getting up to get ready for work taking my meds showering brushing my teeth on autopilot until i die. for years. how am i about to be 25 and i can’t tell if i have actually friends or not. why can i not make decisions for myself and take risks that might be worth it. why can’t i create. i complain and complain and wallow but sometimes maybe thats all that’s left of me. until i die. for years
#it has to get better at some point right#i will have ppl that want to text me and check in on me right#i will feel loved like genuinely loved because i believe ppl when they tell me they love me right#right…..RIGHT#someone get me to finish making these cover letters#so i can apply at better jobs#i have to do something#owen if u see this#please know for some reason i have been thinking of u#which is weird and random cus i know we don’t talk that much but u have shown me nothing but kindness#and i like to think in another timeline we are good friends irl#u are such a warm person with such a powerful mind. u make the world a better place
