Some vanilla art Iâve done recently plus one of my favorite songs from Toad Biscuitâs newest album đ€ (I wrote the lyrics & musical composition đ€)
The lyrics on the last two photos are also Toad Biscuit lyrics âš

seen from Germany
seen from China

seen from Martinique
seen from United States
seen from Germany

seen from India

seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom

seen from TĂŒrkiye
seen from Singapore
seen from China
seen from China

seen from Malaysia
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from Philippines
seen from China
Some vanilla art Iâve done recently plus one of my favorite songs from Toad Biscuitâs newest album đ€ (I wrote the lyrics & musical composition đ€)
The lyrics on the last two photos are also Toad Biscuit lyrics âš

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I figured itâs been a while since posting any Vaelyn content, so BEHOLD â a Rex and Vee Drabble~
Side note, itâs been so long since Iâve posted any Vee fics, you may notice he now has an Australian accent. Just pretend heâs always had an accent, okay? đ
Side note part two, the shirt Vee is wearing along with a bunch of cheap Toad Biscuit merch can be found at my store! And you can listen to Toad Biscuit on all streaming platforms! Spotify, Apple Music, SoundCloud, YouTube Music, Pandora, TikTok, etc!
The motel had all the charm of a forgotten ashtray. One flickering lamp. A window that didnât open. Air conditioner growling like it wanted to die.
Rexar sat in the desk chair, long legs kicked up, idly exhaling a thin ribbon of smoke that smelled faintly of burnt maple. The scent was warm, groundingâsomething human in a room that wasnât.
Across the room, Vaelyn Hawthorne was already losing a fight with the air.
He sat cross-legged on the bed, surrounded by a battlefield of tissues, dark green hair sticking up like heâd been electrocuted. âOi,â he muttered thickly, glaring at the ceiling vent. âThat thingâs spewinâ bloody sand, I swearââ
His voice hitched mid-complaint. âHang onâgonna sneezeâ!â
âEishh! Ishh! Ish! âshh! âŠhehhHH!âEEIISSHHuhh!â
The last one nearly folded him in half.
Rex didnât even flinch. âGood lord, man. Sounded like a choir falling down a flight of stairs.â
âShut up,â Vee croaked, scrubbing at his nose. âSâdot fuddy.â
âItâs a little funny.â
âYouâre a bastard.â
âBeen told.â
He barely got two seconds of peace before his nostrils flared again. Another round loaded.
âAh, youâve gotta be kiddinâ meâEishh! Ishh! Ish! âshh! âŠhehhHH!âEEIISSHHuhh!â
By the time the fit died, his chest was heaving and his eyes were glassy. Rexar leaned over, tossed him a fresh tissue box, and grinned. âYou done tryinâ to exorcise the dust demons or you goinâ for round three?â
Vee sniffled. âShut it, bate. Iâb allergic to your fuckinâ existedce.â
âYeah? Then how come youâre still breathinâ?â
âTragic oversight.â
Rex laughedâlow, rasping, real. The sound filled the room, steady as a heartbeat. âYouâve been like this since you were six,â he said. âRemember that summer in Aleda? You sneezed so hard you fell off the dock.â
âI was pushed,â Vee argued.
âYou sneezed and flung yourself sideways.â
âSemantics.â
Rex shook his head, a half-smile tugging at his mouth. âYouâre lucky you can sing, man. Any other job, youâd be fired for this kind of noise pollution.â
Vee blew his nose with a honk that could have woken the dead. âBugger off. At least I donât souâd like I gargle gravel every borning.â
âBetter than sounding like a dying accordion,â Rex shot back.
Vee laughed, nose twitching again, but he tried to fight it this timeâhand fluttering in front of his face like a one-man semaphore. âNah, nah, nahâhhâEisshhuhhh! hhâtsschhhuhhh! hhEhhâEhhESSHHhhuhh!â
âYeah,â Rex said dryly. âThatâll teach the dust.â
He got up, grabbed one of the crappy motel washcloths, and dropped it on Veeâs chest. âIce bucketâs still half full. Cool your face before you melt.â
Vee pressed it against his forehead with a groan. âYouâd bake a terrible durse.â
âIâd make a terrible lotta things.â Rex leaned on the bedpost, arms crossed. âLucky for you, babysittinâ your sorry ass is part of the job description.â
âYou donât get paid.â
âExactly.â
They fell quiet for a bit, the hum of the air conditioner filling the space between words.
Rex watched him, something like nostalgia flickering behind his grin. âYou know, you always did this,â he said after a while. âTry to act invincible till your body tells you otherwise.â
Vee squinted at him. âYou souâd like by fuckinâ codsciedce.â
âNah,â Rex said softly. âYour conscience sounds smarter.â
Vee snortedâand sneezed immediately after. âIsh! Ish! Hhâish! Shh! hhâTSSHHhhuhhh!â
Rex laughed again, shaking his head. âStill an idiot.â
âStill your idiot.â
âUnfortunately.â
The words werenât tender. They were familiarâthe kind born from years of scraped knees, bad gigs, and nearly getting each other killed more than once.
Vee smiled faintly, rubbing at his nose. âAye, Iâm not ibbortal,â he said, voice rough but wry. âJust irritatingly resilient.â
He gave a wet sniff, eyes glinting with that strange mix of pride and loneliness only Vee could pull off. âStill here. Still breathinâ. Mostly sdeehhhâhhâEisshhuhhh!âsdeezinâ, apparently.â
Rexar huffed a laugh, shaking his head. âYouâre a damn tragedy in stereo.â
Vee smirked, already half-asleep. âIf I die frob this, tell the tabloids I wedt out brave.â
âYeah,â Rex said, voice low and amused. âBrave, dumb, and full of antihistamines.â
âPerfect,â Vee mumbled, and that was the last thing he managed before the room went quiet again.
He drifted off not long after that, face half-buried in the pillow, muttering something about bad air quality.
Rex stayed where he was, smoke curling around him, the lamplight catching on the edges of Veeâs tattoos. He took one last drag, exhaled slow, and shook his head.
âDumb bastard,â he said, fond as sin. âThe world never deserved you anyway.â
The lamp buzzed, the air conditioner wheezed, and somewhere between all that noise, the room felt like home.
Did you know you can listen to Rexarâs band, Toad Biscuit, on SoundCloud (and YouTube)?
(All songs written by me I mean Rexar)
Pollenageddon
Written & Illustrated by allergeez âš originally written at @sniffli-danni âs request for more rexar đ€
Wasnât originally going to write smut but it just came out and Iâm not sorry đ©đ©
Summay: When overworked Kriia Thomas takes a much-needed spa retreat, her chaotic pyro boyfriend Rexar Fang insists heâll handle things at home. What begins as a secret mission to surprise her by tackling her most loathed household chores spirals into a day of magikal malfunctions, domestic disasters, and one catastrophic allergic encounter with a cursed plant. As pollen fills the air and Rexar struggles to keep his powers in check (and his sneezes from setting the house on fire), Kriia begins to suspect he's up to something. What follows is a hilariously steamy unraveling of secrets, stamina, and increasingly congested seduction. A blend of magikal slice-of-life, romantic mischief, and erotically charged chaos, Pollenageddon proves that nothing says âI love youâ like vacuuming stairs and suffering through supernatural hay fever. 8.8k words + NSFW
Content Warnings:
* Explicit sexual content: Includes detailed, graphic depictions of sex with strong kink themes.
* Sneezing fetish / allergy kink: Central to the erotic tone; repeated and emphasized throughout.
* Mild D/s dynamic: Playful domination, power shifts in romantic context.
* Body fluids: Includes messy, snotty sneezing, wet sounds, and explicit use of bodily reactions for erotic effect.
* Magical bodily reactions: Pyrokinetic sneezes, magically induced congestion, pollen-based afflictions.
* Light humiliation / teasing: Especially related to vulnerability and messy sneezing.
* Mild injury / physical strain: Nothing severe, but includes minor bruises, splinters, overexertion.
* Swearing / profanity: Throughout..
Kriia Thomas had been staring at the same infernal piece of paper for the last hour and a half. It wasnât that the ink was fadingâthough it was, in streaks that bled into each other like dried bloodâbut that her eyes simply refused to process another damn syllable. The sun hung over the far end of the estate's east wing, filtered through panes of aged, greenhouse-glass that she still hadnât gotten around to cleaning. Light pooled on the table like honey left too long in the cold, sticky and slanted, warming her knuckles as she wrote.
Or rather, as she glared at the page, the pen frozen between her fingers, smudging her left pinky with ink for the seventh time today.
A ripple of shadow curled around her ankle of its own accord. She flicked it away with the casual irritation of someone swatting a familiar gnat. âDonât start with me,â she muttered.
From behind, footsteps padded softly over the hardwood. Plush, unrushed, annoyingly confident. She didnât need to look to know who they belonged to. The familiar scent of toasted marshmallow and something darkerâburnt maple wood, ever-present and subtleâreached her first, followed by the telltale curl of warmth that always hit when he entered a room.
âWorking hard or hardlyââ
âDonât you finish that sentence, Rexar.â
Rexar Fang grinned anyway, undeterred as ever. He leaned against the doorframe with all the languid grace of a man whoâd never once been made to wait for anything. He was barefoot, shirtless, a towel slung over his shoulder, glistening from a late-morning rinse. His silver hair was still damp, red bangs dripping down his forehead and catching in his lashes. A coffee mug was cradled in one calloused palmâblack, with âFANG 4EVERâ etched in fading white letters that Kriia had mockingly gifted him last Solstice.
The steam from the mug drifted up, briefly catching in the lazy spirals of smoke that always curled from his nose. She never shouldâve found it relaxing. But she did. Worse still, she missed it when he wasnât around.
âYou look like you havenât moved in three days,â he said, sauntering in without waiting for permission. âBabe, be honest with meâare you trying to physically become paperwork?â
âShut up.â
âYou know, itâs a tragedy that no oneâs discovered the dark and sultry beauty of accounting-core. You could really revolutionizeââ
She threw a pen at him.
He caught it between two fingers without spilling his coffee and winked at her over the rim of the mug. âFeisty. Love that. Keep going.â
Kriia slumped further into her chair, dragging her fingers down her face, frustration smudged in streaks of dried pen ink along her skin. âI canât just walk away from all this, Rex. Weâre two weeks behind on invoices, the security systems need recalibrating before nightfall, and someoneââshe shot him a sharp lookââfried two of the sprinkler circuits because he âfelt a sneeze coming onâ and didnât step back.â
âThatâs⊠barely accurate. It was one circuit. Maybe one and a half.â
She didnât respond. She didnât have to. Her deep purple eyes did all the scathing.
Rexar approached slowly, setting the coffee down beside her with exaggerated care before crouching to her level. âListen, gloom queen,â he said softly, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. âYou need a break. You're getting snappier than Remi during tax season.â
âI am notââ
He poked her cheek with one finger.
She batted it away. âRexarââ
âCâmon.â His voice lowered, crooning. âI already arranged it. My familyâs estate up near Blueflame Ridgeâyou know, the one with the natural hot springs and that terrifying koi pond with the aggressive fish you love?â
Kriia blinked. âWaitâthe Ridge property? Thatâs like three hours away.â
âNot if you take the tunnel.â
Her eyebrow twitched. âYou want me to crawl through ancient stone rat-tunnels to go take a spa day?â
âNo, no.â He held up both hands. âI had the place cleaned. Fresh sheets. Lavender oil. I even set out one of those ugly bathrobes you like, the one that makes you look like a death cult leaderâs sugar baby.â
Her lips twitched. Almost.
He leaned in further, nose brushing hers. âYou deserve one day off. Iâll handle things around here. I promise.â
âYouâll burn the place down,â she said flatly, narrowing her eyes like a cat watching a candle.
âNot even a little,â Rexar said, voice smooth as caramel left too long on a warm stove. âIâve got everything under control.â
Her eyebrow crept up. âYou? Control?â
âMmhm.â He sipped from his mugâway too casually. âIâve got a whole itinerary. A very responsible, safe, extremely boring day lined up.â
She blinked. âYou made an itinerary.â
âOf course I did,â he said, nodding solemnly, smoke curling lazily from his nostrils like the universe punctuating his lie. âDidnât even use crayons.â
âThatâs not comforting.â
âCome on, have a little faith.â He leaned in and kissed her cheek, warm and brief. âIâm just gonna handle a few things around the estate. Nothing explosive. Nothing illegal. Nothing that starts with âYou know what would be a great ideaâââ
Her gaze narrowed. âWait.â
âYes, my love?â
âWhat exactly are you planning to do while Iâm gone?â
He froze just a second too long. âI mean... estate stuff.â
âEstate stuff?â
âYâknow. The usual. Papers. Books. Maybe finally deal with that one cupboard that keeps muttering racial slurs in the pantry.â
She gave him a long, flat look. âRexar.â
He smiled back, too innocent, too symmetrical.
âI swear,â she said slowly, âif I come back and find you waist-deep in gutters or crawling around the chimney againââ
He grabbed the sides of her chair, lifted it an inch off the ground as he leaned in close, voice lowered with fond exasperation. âKriia. Kriia. My feral, suspicious, gorgeous little menace. Do I look like a man who would voluntarily do hard labor while his girlfriend is luxuriating in a magikal hot spring?â
âYes.â
âOkay, fair. But this time? No chores. No rooftop heroics. Just me, my papers, some snacks, and maybe a few light musical interludes.â
He stood, lifting her chair with him slightly as he cupped her chin. âDo you trust me?â
âNot at all.â
He laughed, full-bodied and warm. âPerfect. Thatâs the spirit.â He pressed a kiss to her forehead, lingering longer than usual. âGo get naked in the woods for a few hours. Iâll be fine.â
She squinted at him. â...You swear youâll call if something goes wrong?â
âIâll call if something goes right.â
âThatâs worse.â
He beamed. âI know.â
She sighed, bone-deep, but the exhaustion in her shoulders had already started to unknot. She leaned forward, pressing her face against his bare stomach just brieflyâjust enough for him to rest a hand in her hair.
âIâm still going to check in.â
âI expect nothing less.â
âDonât you dare sneeze inside the house.â
âNo promises.â
She squinted at him, deadpan.
He pressed a kiss to her forehead, the tip of her nose, then her lips. âNow go. Before Iâm forced to carry you to the tunnel like a dramatic husband in a soap opera.â
She huffed but allowed herself to smile.
Still, as she stepped through the front door a few minutes later, her eyes lingered on him just a moment too long. And Rexar, left alone in the hallway with only the fading scent of her shampoo and the rapidly cooling coffee, finally let his grin drop.
He turned on his heel, reached into the inside pocket of his cardigan, and pulled out a list.
A very familiar list. Covered in Kriiaâs handwriting. Her secret list of nightmare chores.
He unrolled it slowly, eyeing it like a knight about to challenge a dragon.
âLetâs do this.â
The instance the door closed behind her and the last glimmer of morning light vanished from the hall, Rexar Fang let out a long, theatrical exhale.
âFinally,â he muttered, tossing his hair back with all the gravity of a stage actor delivering the death monologue of a tragic hero. The rich, smoky scent trailing from his nostrils caught on the cold stone, curling like ribbon down the corridor. âSheâs gone.â
He reached into the hidden inner pocket of his cardiganâdark wool, warm, with faint singe marks on the hemâand retrieved the list. The list. Kriiaâs long-forgotten, drunkenly-scrawled List of Utter Shit She Refuses to Do.
He unfolded it with a reverence typically reserved for cursed grimoires or concert setlists. A haphazard scrawl of black ink and ash-charred fingerprints covered the page. In the corner was a little doodle of a crying mushroom wearing boots. Rexar smiled fondly.
He remembered the night perfectlyâKriia, half-drunk and fully irate, slouched sideways in the kitchen wearing a stolen Fang family robe two sizes too big, shouting at no one in particular about how âyou canât clean magik with magik sometimes, okay?! Sometimes a girlâs just gotta crawl into the guts of the house and scrub ancient grime off the ass of a rune stone by hand.â
Sheâd punctuated the sentence by scribbling furiously onto the paper with her pen, naming every disgusting, cursed, labor-intensive job on the estate she had mentally blocked for six months.
Heâd kept the scroll like a love letter. Because of course he had.
Now, alone in the silence of the estateâs main hall, Rexar rolled his shoulders, and squared his stance.
âAlright,â he said, to the ghosts and portraits and ominous ceiling. âOperation: Domestic God is a go.â
Chore 1: Under the Deck â The Drain of Doom
Within fifteen minutes, Rexar was shirtless, kneeling in the wet mulch beneath the north-facing deck, elbow-deep in a drain pipe that smelled like swamp rot and ancient regret. The estateâs plumbing was only semi-sentient, which meant it wouldnât bite, but it might spit if you startled it.
Something squelched ominously beneath his palm.
He hissed, recoiling. âNope. No. I donât get paid enoughâwell, okay, I do, technically, but stillâugh.â
He reached back in. Pulled. A massive wad of half-decomposed leaves, twigs, and a very angry clump of what looked like lichen slurped free with a disgusting schlrk.
âGlamorous,â he muttered. âSo glamorous. This is how rockstars die.â
Chore 2: The Stairway to Hell
Next came vacuuming the stairsâan objectively simple task that still managed to feel like penance. It wasnât hard, exactly. It just sucked. Literally and metaphorically. The vacuum was old, bulky, and had a cord shorter than his patience. Every single stair meant bending, dragging, switching outlets, wrestling with the hose like it was trying to escape him.
Kriia hated this chore. Hated it so much sheâd once dramatically declared it âa soul-eroding spiral of despair,â and Rexar was beginning to understand why.
Chore 3: Power-Washing the South Wall (a.k.a Dodge-the-Runeball)
By late morning, Rexar had lugged the estateâs ancient arcane-powered water pressure system to the south-facing stone wall. This part of the estate was built in the Pre-Blood Accord era and was riddled with protective sigils that sometimes malfunctioned when wet.
Halfway through the job, one fired a spark that singed the edge of his pants.
âOkay!â he shouted upward. âWhichever great-great-grandfang enchanted this shit, your layering runes are sloppy!â
A rune fired again. He barely ducked in time.
âSloppy and bitter!â
The stone glistened under the midday sun, beads of water steaming on the surface, casting rainbow refractions that danced across his back. His skin was flushed, smudged with soot and dried mud, smoke rising a little thicker from his nose now as the heat from his own body began to build.
It was just as he reached the top of the second storyâbalancing one foot on the rain gutter and the other on a gargoyle shaped like a disgruntled badgerâthat his phone buzzed.
The screen lit up, vibrating against the strap of his tool belt.
âFuck, fuck, fuckâshit!â
He scrambled to wedge the hose back into the reel on the wall and ducked out of view, brushing his face frantically with the only clean-ish towel he hadâunfortunately still covered in leaf gunk from the drain.
He opened his phone, answering the call.
Kriiaâs Face: Glorious, Glowing, and Pissed
Kriia appeared on-screen, lounging in the natural hot springs like a fucking goddess. Her skin was dewy, flushed from the heat, crimson hair wet and slicked back, glowing like molten metal under the golden sun. She sipped delicately from a glass of fruit-infused water, condensation sliding down the sides like something out of an advertorial for luxury witch vacations.
Rexar felt something in his brain short-circuit. Then he smiled lazily, head tilted just so.
âWell, hello.â
She narrowed her eyes. âWhy do you sound out of breath?â
âHmm?â He adjusted the angle so that all she could see was an innocuous grey stone wall behind him. âOh, just... sorting papers. You know. Big boring archive day.â
The phone trembled slightly as it balanced on the overturned paint bucket he was using as a stand.
âYou donât sort paperwork.â
âI do today.â
Kriia took another slow sip. âWhy is your hair wet?â
âUm. Shower. Self-care. You are always telling me to hydrate.â
She peered closer. âIs that soot on your collarbone?â
He leaned out of frame just long enough to rub at it.
âNoooope. Charcoal mask. Very detoxifying.â
There was a beat of silence.
ThenâmercifullyâKriia let it go. She sighed, leaned back into the hot spring, and closed her eyes for just a second.
Rexar stared, unable to help the tiny smile that tugged at his lips.
âYouâre enjoying yourself?â he asked, softer.
Her mouth quirked. â...Yes. For now.â
âGood.â His voice dropped to a murmur. âYou deserve it, you know.â
She looked at him. Just for a second. And that was enough.
Then the screen blurred out again.
He exhaled, slumped against the wall, and let his head thunk back against the hot stone.
âThree down,â he mumbled, dragging a hand down his sweat-streaked face. âTwelve to go.â
The sky had turned a glassy shade of blue, no longer morning-soft but blazing directly overhead, cooking the slate tiles of the estateâs roof into something approximating a stovetop. Rexar braced himself on a crossbeam, halfway up the western tower, a coil of gutter-hooks slung around one shoulder, the other hand jammed into a leather sack full of citrus-scented de-liming tablets that Kriia had insisted were âmore eco-friendly.â
Heâd abandoned his shirt an hour ago. Now he was slick with sweat, streaked with soot from the wall washing and something that smelled suspiciously like squirrel piss. His hair curled wildly around his face, damp and silver-white and clinging to his temples. His nose twitched.
The air was thick with pine needles and the unmistakable reek of old bird droppings. The gutters hadnât been cleaned in years, judging by the black sludge clinging to the inside edges like wet compost made of regret. At some point, a whole squirrel family had moved in, padding out their nest with shredded snack wrappers, dryer lint, andâsomehowâa sock.
Rexar crouched low on the sloped roof tiles, squinting into the muck. âAlright, guys. Youâve got ten seconds to clear out before I start scooping this crap out by hand.â
There was a chorus of chittering from the downspout. One particularly fat squirrel poked its head over the edge, chewed slowly on a zip tie, and stared at him with unblinking judgment.
âOkay, rude,â Rexar muttered.
He dug into his hoodie pocket and pulled out one of Kriiaâs weird snack baggiesâhalf a protein bar and a single, lonely almond. He held it up like an offering. The squirrels paused.
Ten seconds later, he was kneeling beside an abandoned nest, flicking bottle caps into a trash bag. âBribery,â he sighed. âGets results.â
He dug in with both hands, scraping away pine muck that crunched like wet leather. The smell hit him first. Mold. Old rain. Dust baked into death by too many summers. And thenâsomething worse. Something ancient and floral, like cursed gardenias left too long in the sun.
He sniffed once.
Then again, sharper.
His breath hitched.
âOh noââ
He tried to twist, duck his head into his shoulder, but it was too late.
âhhihâtchhxSSHHuh!! hahâESSHHâIUE!! hh'ieXSHHH!â
A short, sharp spray of sparks shot from his nose, singeing the shingles where he crouched. They fizzled harmlessly against his skinâthank the ancestors for pyromancer physiologyâbut a few danced dangerously close to the dry pine thatch along the edge of the gutter.
He cringed. âShit.â
The phone buzzed in his pocket.
Rexar fumbled it out with sap-streaked fingers, balancing one foot on a support beam, the other half-sliding on a slick of runoff slime.
He opened the call.
Kriia AppearedâRegal, Relaxed, Ruthless
She was lying on a deck chair beside the springs now, wrapped in a towel. A thick, green clay mask coated her face, two cucumber slices perched perfectly over her eyes. Somewhere in the background, windchimes jingled, and what sounded like a waterfall burbled soothingly.
âWhy do I hear wind?â she asked immediately, flat and suspicious.
âYou donât,â Rexar said, breathless.
He was half-hanging off the gutter, one leg swinging into open air. Behind him, a loose tile clattered off the roof and tumbled into the shrubs with a soft plunk.
She sat up slightly, one cucumber tilting off. âAre you outside?â
âNope.â
A moment passed.
Then his breath caught again. And again. Shit. Shit.
He twisted away from the camera just in time.
âhuhhâgkTSHHkxh! hhâtSSHHHuhhh! ...hhuhhâCHSSHHHhht!â
Three in a row, tight and half-stifled against his arm, each one flaring with small but potent sparks. The third scorched the side of a tile, leaving a black crescent burn and the faint scent of maple smoke.
Kriia didnât speak.
When he looked back at the screen, her eyebrow was raised.
â...Did you sneeze?â
Rexar cleared his throat. âMustâve been the wind.â
âYou sneezed fire.â
âWind, babe. Spicy wind.â
The call ended before she could answerâbecause his grip slipped entirely and he dropped, landing ass-first in a haystack two stories below.
âOw.â
Chimney: Dusty Hell Dimension
The chimney had always been Kriiaâs least favorite architectural feature. Ornate as hell, etched with serpent carvings and crowned with a brass smoke-fan that whistled ominously when the temperature dropped below freezing. The inside, however, was a soot-streaked nightmare.
Rexar climbed in halfway, dragging a bristle wand behind him. Within three minutes, he was coughing black dust from his lungs, hair and chest smeared with soot, and vaguely wondering if one of the stones was trying to bite him.
âWhy,â he muttered, voice hoarse, âdid I think this would be fun?â
He was halfway through re-anchoring a rock in the wall when his phone buzzed again.
âNo, noâfuckâgimme one secââ
He scrambled out of the fireplace alcove, coughing up soot as he ducked behind the nearest curtainâan overly dramatic velvet number in the drawing room that smelled faintly of dust and old perfume. Wiping his face with the back of his wrist, he took a moment to catch his breath and assess the damage: hair wild, cheeks streaked with ash, one sock missing.
With a muttered curse, he smoothed his hair back, tugged his shirt straight, and slapped a bit of water from the nearby plant onto his face. It helped. Kind of. At least he no longer looked like heâd just wrestled a chimney.
The video call came through. He took one last breath, forced on a half-decent smile, and answered.
Kriia. Again. This Time: Steam Goddess Mode
She was in the middle of a steamy stone chamber, towel wrapped snug around her chest, a matching wrap around her head. Steam coiled around her like silk. Her cheeks were flushed. Droplets clung to her collarbones.
Rexar froze.
And short-circuited.
And maybe forgot language for a second.
Her lip curled just slightly. âYou look... different.â
âIâuh. Yeah. Just moved into the study. Paperwork sorting. You know.â He was clearly behind a curtain.
She tilted her head. âYouâre not... hiding anything from me, are you?â
âNo, no.â He cleared his throat. âNot at all.â
Then his nose twitched again. And again.
His shoulders jerked thrice. âhuhâtCHhhâ! HIIHâNKXSHH! HâKngxsstSH!â He caught them into his hand with an explosive spark and immediately muted the call.
Kriia watched the image flicker.
Unmuted.
Her smirk had grown.
âBless you.â
âWasnât a sneeze,â he said, far too quickly.
âUh-huh.â
âDusty archive. Dry air. Airborne mites.â
âSure, Rex.â
âYou look incredible, by the way.â
âFlattery wonât save you if youâre lying to me.â
He grinned, a little breathless. âWanna bet?â
She sighed, adjusting the towel around her chest. âYouâre ridiculous.â
âYouâre gorgeous.â
âMmhm.â
She let it go. For now.
The called winked out again.
Rexar sagged back into the wall tapestry, now utterly blackened with soot from his skin. He was drenched in sweat, bruised from the haystack fall, and still had chimney soot in his teeth.
He coughed, and sparks fizzled between his lips.
"Three more chores," he groaned. "Then... the greenhouse."
He had no idea that that was where it would all fall apart.
By midafternoon, the sun burned overhead like a curse, high and unyielding, baking the estateâs fields into golden glass and casting sharp shadows across the wild perimeter of the west gardens. The air shimmered with heat. Distant insects buzzed like badly tuned violins.
And Rexar Fang, shirtless and defiant, stood at the threshold of the greenhouse like he was about to fight a God.
His shoulders glistened with sweat. Not shimmered. Glistened. Rivulets of salt-slick moisture ran down the sharp ridges of his spine, collecting at the dip of his back and beading along the fine trail of silver hair that arrowed from his navel to the waistband of his half-unbuttoned work pants. His hands were filthy. His cheek was streaked with ash. A cut just above his left brow had dried, smudged over from when the damn squirrel bit him.
Still, he grinned.
The heavy glass doors hissed open. Humid, sweetly pungent air blasted him in the face. Floral. Dense. Clinging. The greenhouse was a living beast in summerâovergrown, feral, dripping from every fern and vine like it was breathing on its own.
âHome stretch,â he muttered. âLast one. Youâve got this.â
He stepped inside.
Sunlight pierced the glass roof in tight, hot beams, illuminating floating pollen like a haze of gold-dust fireflies. Something chirped once, deep in the belly of a tropical planter.
Rexar flexed his fingers, tying his shirt around his head like a ragged bandana, shoving his bangs back. His torso gleamed, the smattering of red freckles across his shoulders catching the light like warpaint. Smoke curled lazily from his nostrils as the ambient heat pushed his body into a low burn.
He waded into the foliage.
The grime on the walls was years oldâbuilt-up spatter from failed potions, plant vomit, storm silt. He licked a knuckle, pressed his palm to the glass, and began scrubbing.
âBet she'd get flustered seeing me like this,â he muttered under his breath, amused. âMmmh... all wet and covered in algae... sweaty arms, panting, shirtless... yeah, sheâd want me real bad.â
He chuckled. A smug, nasal thing. He was mid-wipe, elbow-deep in moss when he shifted slightly, bumped a shelf behind himâ
âand knocked a small, golden-stemmed plant off balance.
The bloom trembled.
A soft fwump sounded.
The plant exploded.
A full cloud of fine, shimmering pollen burst into the air like someone had popped a glitter grenade right in his face.
Rexar froze.
â...Uh oh.â
His breath hitched immediately.
Not just from the stenchâa sweet, overwhelming scent like sugar-dusted cloveâbut from the instant assault on his sinuses.
He blinked. Twice.
âDonât you dareââ
âhhâihhhâtSCHUHHhh! EhhâTCHSSHHhuuhh!! HuhHh'EGNTâTCHHhhUHHhh!!â
Three. Full force. Sparks exploded from his nose in brilliant arcs, fire flaring in all directions before dying out midair. A nearby orchid went up in smoke before he could stomp it out.
âFUCK!â
He staggered back, eyes watering, nose crimson. âDamn itâno, no, noâfuck, hold it togetherââ
His phone buzzed.
He growled low in his throat and yanked it open, trying desperately to brush pollen off his face and out of his hair.
Kriia: Suspicious, Radiant, Impossibly Calm
She was seated in a shade cabana now, face freshly scrubbed, her hair damp and curling softly at her jaw. Her expression was unreadable, but her voice was pure frost.
âWhere are you?â
Rexar froze for a heartbeat.
Then smiled.
Poorly.
âMe? Nowhere suspicious. Justâuhânot the greenhouse.â
Her brow lifted. âReally.â
âYup.â He coughed into his elbow. The sound crackled. His nose twitched violently.
âBecause it sort of looks like youâreââ
He turned, caught the next sneeze in the crook of his arm.
âhehhâTCHZuhh!! hhâGnXxtCHuh!! nâGCHZZhh!â
Sparks scattered across the glass wall behind him. One of the vines recoiled in alarm.
Kriiaâs eyes narrowed to slits. âRexââ
âOh no,â he said quickly, tapping the screen. âBad signal. Some kind of interference? The receptionâs... choppyâ!â
He cut the call.
The greenhouse was boiling. His sinuses burned, nose glowing red, eyes constantly tearing as more spores floated down from the shattered Sniffle bloom. Every breath was war.
But Rexar Fang did not quit.
âFuckinâ... shadow goblin... goddess of guilt... Iâm not stopping now,â he rasped, crouching again to wipe more algae from the window.
His shirt-headband sagged over one eye. He was panting, shirtless and gleaming like some fallen sun deity crawling through jungle hell.
Pollen clung to his curls, smeared along his jawline. His mouth parted with every breath, shaky and uneven.
âhuhHuhhâTSCHHHuhh!! hhâGxCHuhh!! HehhâtSCHHâzzUhh!!â
Three more. Each one worse. Each one setting off sparks that fizzled against his bare chest, the sweat sizzling on impact.
âSteady,â he croaked, clutching the scrub cloth. âFocus. Come on, Fang. Youâre hotter than this.â
He pressed a forearm to his upper lip and forced himself upright again.
Another wall down.
Another corner cleared.
The spores thickened in the air.
His body trembled now, feverish from the effort of keeping the flames stifled. His muscles ached. His nose dripped.
And stillâhe scrubbed.
Another explosion of itch rolled through him and he slammed a shoulder into the wall, bracing himself.
âhehhâhhhehhh-TSCHSHHUUHH!! NnnâGNTâCHSHUUhh!! hhâHETâTSCHZZHH!â
He let the last one out against the floor, a tongue of fire licking out onto the damp moss tiles, leaving a black scorch mark that hissed before dying.
He stood for a moment, heaving.
Then wiped his nose on the back of his hand and slumped to his knees in the corner of the greenhouse.
Every inch of him itched.
He was flushed, ragged, eyes glassy, sweat running in furious streaks down his spine, and he could still hear Kriiaâs voice in his headâsoft, warning, fondly exasperated.
She was going to kill him.
He laughed weakly.
Then sneezed again.
âhehhâtSCHHHuhhh!! hhuhâTSCHZZHuhhh!! HhHhhâGCHHssHH!!â
Three more.
Pollen burst up from the floor in retaliation.
The greenhouse stood behind him like a vanquished titanâhumid, shimmering, its doors now propped open to let the pollen fog breathe out into the sweltering yard. Rexar trudged across the grass, shirtless, half-drenched, and coated in streaks of wet soot, old grime, and unmistakable golden flecks of pollen dust that still clung to every wild strand of his silver-red hair.
His shirt, or what remained of it, was tied loosely around his forehead like a defeated flag, damp with sweat and warped from the heat. The pollen had seeped into everythingâhis nose, his throat, the lines of his jaw where perspiration carved glowing trails through the gold dust.
He stopped just before the veranda, dragged his forearm across his face, and leaned on one of the carved banisters.
His phone buzzed in his back pocket.
He stared at it, debated throwing it into the koi pond.
Instead, he pulled it out, thumbed screen, and lifted it to eye level.
Kriia: Cool, Controlled, Clocking Everything
She was reclined againâthis time beneath a shady awning of hanging wisteria. Her hair was up, cheeks flushed, wrapped in a deep purple towel that complimented the sheen of her freshly-oiled shoulders. A drink glimmered in her hand, half-melted ice swirling gently.
But it was her eyes that stopped him cold.
Because this time, she didnât speak right away.
She just stared.
Rexar, by contrast, looked like heâd lost a bar fight with a botanical god.
He sniffled sharply. The sound wasnât cute. It was wet, raw, and completely incriminating.
Kriia tilted her head.
âHi,â he rasped. âYou look gorgeous.â
âYou look like you got into a fistfight with an anthillâŠ.â
He grinned, crooked and congested. âGreenhouse humidity. Great for the pores.â
âYou sound like a dying frog.â
âSexy frog, though. Right?â
âYouâre glistening.â
âThank you.â
âThat wasnât a compliment.â
He opened his mouth to retort, but his breath faltered. Eyes squeezed shut, chest risingâ
âhhuhHâTCHSHHuhh!! hhâtCHHHzzh!! HehhâTCHHHUUuhh!â
Three again. No escaping it.
He caught them into the crook of his arm, shoulders trembling, then gave a soft, audible whimper.
Kriiaâs expression didnât move, but her lips parted just slightly.
He sniffed again, frustrated, and muttered something under his breath before grabbing the sweat-soaked shirt still tied around his head. He yanked it off with one hand and lifted it to his face, pressing hard as he blew his nose into the ruined fabric. The sound was obsceneâwet, full, draggingâand left him wincing.
He dropped the shirt out of frame like a bomb.
Kriiaâs eye twitched. Just a flicker.
âYou good?â she asked tightly.
âNever better,â he croaked.
âReally.â
Rexar sagged down onto the steps leading into the estate, still visible in frame, rubbing his temple with the heel of his hand. He sniffled againâshorter this time. âI did your list.â
Pause.
âWhat?â
âYour list.â He looked up, smiling like it hurt. âThe Horrific Horrors of Household Hell. Been working through it all day.â
â...Rexar.â
âEven the squirrel nest.â
âI told you not toââ
âYou never really told me not to. You just said youâd die before doing it yourself. So, really, I figured I was performing an act of love.â
She stared at him, stunned. Then her face softened for half a heartbeat. But only that.
âRexar,â she said again, slowly, âwhy are you sneezing so much?â
He rubbed the back of his neck. âSomething in the greenhouse definitely didnât like me.â
Kriiaâs eyes narrowed. âWas it yellow and fluffy? Sitting near the orchid shelf?â
He blinked. âMaybeâhhâECHHhhzzH!! etâCHXIEW!! Fuck!âmaybe! Why? Hehhâ heTâCHXOO!!â
Her lips twitched. âThatâs my Sniffle Thistle. It bloomed last week.â
Silence.
He stared at her.
âYou were gonna use it on me?â
âEventually.â
Another beat.
Then he laughed. A short, broken thing, hoarse and almost giddy. âYou were gonna use a weaponized pollen bomb on me on purpose?â
She smiled faintly. âNot today.â
âYou maniac.â
âYou like it.â
He wheezed another laugh, bending slightly, curls sagging over his eyes as he tried not to combust. âI fucking do, thatâs the worst part.â
âYouâre going inside,â she said firmly.
âIâm already inside the yard.â
âShower. Now.â
âFine, fine.â He stood, groaned as his back cracked, then turned the phone slightly so she could see the trailing smoke from his tear ducts. âBut just for the recordâif the whole place goes up, itâs your Sniffle Thistleâs fault.â
âYou shouldnât have knocked it over.â
âYou shouldnât have left me alone with it!â
âShower,â she repeated, though there was a distinct fondness rising in her tone. âAnd then sit your fiery helpless ass down. Iâm coming home.â
âI am not helpless,â he mumbled.
âNo,â she said. âYouâre Superman. And you just got your ass kicked by a flower.â
â...Yeah. Fair.â
The front door creaked open with all the melodrama of a haunted houseâmostly thanks to the shitty old hinges that no one had oiled in years. A gust of cool evening air swept into the overly warm house, cutting through the lingering heat like a breath of fresh sarcasm.
Kriia stepped over the threshold, barefoot and glowing from the inside out. Her hair was freshly brushed, loose and soft against her shoulders, the wisteria scent of her post-spa oils clinging to her like shadowed perfume. She wore her comfiest oversized hoodieâhis hoodie, technically, one that still smelled faintly of smoke and sweat and old cologneâand a pair of tiny, black shorts that peeked out only when she moved fast enough.
She did not announce herself. She didnât have to.
Rexar's scent was everywhereâsmoke and sugar, singed pine and something warm, familiar. It led her down the hall like a trail of invisible breadcrumbs. She followed it past the scorched curtain in the drawing room, and into the great roomâ
Where she found him.
Sprawled sideways across the velvet chaise like a goddamn fever dream.
He was bundled in a maroon robe that had slipped open at the thigh, one arm flopped dramatically off the side like a swooning duchess, hair still damp and curling, faint trails of steam lifting off his skin. His nose was redâcartoon redâand he clutched a crumpled towel in one hand like it had wronged him personally. The fireplace behind him crackled gently, casting flickers of gold over the length of his long, stretched-out body.
And he was sneezing.
âhhuhâTCHhhuhh!! hhuhâgSCHhhzz! Hhhuhh-hhâTSCHHUHH!â
Each fit rocked him slightly. His whole torso jerked, then slumped again as he groaned into the towel.
âOh my gods,â Kriia breathed, a hand flying to her mouth, âyou look like a tragic romantic painting.â
Rexar squinted one bleary eye open. âWelcome home,â he rasped. âThe plants won.â
Kriia walked in, soft-footed and slow, crouching at his side. âDid you shower?â
âYes.â
âDid you moisturize?â
He squinted harder. âI... rinsed.â
âDid you at least wipe the soot off your back?â
âDefine âwipe.ââ
She reached up and ran her fingers gently down the slope of his spine, and sure enough, a faint smear of black came away on her hand.
He smirked. âSee? Souvenir.â
âYouâre disgusting.â
âAdorable.â He sniffled, loudly, and lifted the towel to his face again. âhuhh... hhuhHh... hhâTCHHHuh! hhHHâKtCHZZhuhhh! hâHhhTSCHHuhhh!! ughhhhh...â
Kriiaâs lips twitched. âThatâs six in the last five minutes.â
âYouâre obsessed with me.â
She dragged the sleeve of her hoodie across his forehead, brushing his curls back as she smiled. âOnly when youâre this pathetic.â
âIâm very pathetic right now.â
âMmhm.â
He leaned into her hand. She cupped his cheek, letting her thumb brush the edge of his red nose. He whimpered.
âYou're flushed,â she said softly.
âI always flush when you touch me.â
She laughed. âShut up.â
He closed his eyes again, nuzzling into her palm, but his breath hitched mid-snuggle.
She watched, delighted, as his whole face crumpled.
âhhuhhhâhhâKTSHHHzz!! HhuhâkGHHTZhh!! NhhTSCHHuhhh!!â
âNine,â she said sweetly.
He groaned. âIt hurts to exist.â
âThatâs what happens when you go twelve rounds with a Sniffle Thistle.â
He coughed once, then sniffed again. âYou really were gonna use that thing on me?â
She smirked. âOnly if you misbehaved.â
âBabe. I always misbehave.â
âExactly.â
He tugged her closer by the sleeve, pulling her half onto the chaise with him. She let him, settling against his chest, careful not to smother himâtoo much.
âYouâre gonna get pollen all over me,â she warned.
âI am pollen at this point.â
âGross.â
âSexy.â
âGrooooss.â
He nuzzled her neck. She squeaked when his nose brushed her skinâstill warm, still wet.
âRexar,â she warned. âDo not sneeze on me.â
âI would never.â He sniffled thickly. âhuhhuhhhâhhuhhhâTSCHHhhuhhh!!â
Right beside her shoulder. A small spark singed the air.
âRexar!â
âSorry!â He grabbed the towel, face red, eyes fluttering. âThey sneak up on me, I swear!âhhuhh-hhhuhhâTCHHHzzh! hhEHhâtKSSCHHhhuh!!â
She melted a little every time he did it. She hated how much she did.
âYouâre the worst,â she murmured, kissing the tip of his flaming nose.
âYouâre in love with me,â he croaked.
âIâm infested with you.â
He smiled, dazed, snotty, completely smitten. âStill wanna marry me?â
âAsk again when youâre not leaking.â
âRomance is dead.â
She curled up against him anyway, dragging the blanket over both of them, planting a kiss in the damp space under his jaw where his skin tasted like smoke and salt.
And Rexar, still sneezing intermittently, still too warm and too soft, exhaled with the sort of contentment that only comes from a job horrifically well done and a girlfriend who would probably kill him for it laterâbut snuggle him first.
âHey babygirl?â he whispered, half-asleep.
âYeah?â
âIâm not doinâ that fuckinâ list again.â
âMm.â
ââŠUnless you ask real nice.â
âShut up.â
And he did. Eventually. Right after one last set of sneezes.
âhuhhâTSCHHUhh!! hhuhHhâkTSCHzzh!! hhuhhâCHHSHhhuhh!!â
She kissed the crown of his head.
âGood boy.â
A few hours later, Rexar woke up tangled in too many blankets, one leg shoved halfway off the side of the couch, his robe bunched at his hips and his hair stuck to the side of his face like wet kelp. The fire had long since dimmed to a low, soft glow. His nose, however, was still bright red and twitching like a live wire.
He barely had time to register the moonlight trickling through the heavy drapes beforeâ
âhhuhâTSCHHHuhh!! HhâHuhhâTCHZZhh!! HhHhâCHHhhuhhh!!â
Three, ragged, each one yanking his abs tight and dragging a sleepy moan from his throat.
From the doorway, Kriia leaned against the frame, arms crossed, eyes dark.
She was in one of his t-shirts again. Just his t-shirt. It slouched off one shoulder and clung to the soft curve of her thighs. Her legs were bare, skin still sun-kissed from the spa, and her purple eyes were fixed squarely on him like he was both a masterpiece and a walking fire hazard.
He sniffled.
Her fingers twitched against her arm.
âYou look like youâve been mauled by a flower.â
He grinned, bleary but sharp. âStill handsome, though?â
She tilted her head. âSomehow.â
Rexar pulled himself upright with a groan, scrubbing at his hair, stretching his arms until his back cracked audibly. He sneezed into his elbow againâsharp, stifled, the sparks barely escaping the velvet of his robe.
She watched, silent.
âYouâre staring,â he rasped.
âNo Iâm not.â
âYouâre trying not to enjoy it.â
She scoffed, but her thighs pressed together just slightly.
âAm I... snuffing out your denial?â he teased, rising to his feet and padding barefoot across the hardwood toward her.
âDonât.â
âDonât what, Kriia?â he purred, voice like smoke slipping through keyholes. âDonât come closer?â Another sneeze overtook him, twisting his face just before he made it to her.
âhhuhâTCHHHHuhhh!! HuhâgCHHZhhuh!! hhâTSCHCHhhuhh!!â
His nose brushed her shoulder mid-fit, heat blooming on her skin.
She shuddered.
âI hate you,â she murmured, lips twitching.
He leaned in, lips brushing the shell of her ear. âYouâre soaked.â
She smacked his chest. âI am notââ
He slipped his hand between her thighs.
âOh,â he said, reverent. âYou are.â
Kriia froze. Just a second. Long enough for the truth to settle under her skin like heat from a slow-building fever.
âDonât.â
âDonât what?â he asked innocently, even as his fingers flexed slightly, pressing the heat of his palm tighter between her legs. His thumb strokedâjust once, feather-light through the cotton of her underwearâand her hips twitched.
âRexarââ
âYouâve been staring at me all night,â he murmured, crowding in close again. His breath was hot against her cheek, still carrying the edge of congestion, the ghost of a fire just behind his voice. âPretending it wasnât driving you crazy⊠the sneezing, the mess, the way Iâve been barely holding it together while still getting your entire list doneââ
âYou were notââ
âetâtCHOO!! hahâESSHHâIUE! huhâTSCHHHuhhh!!â
He sneezed mid-sentence, stifled low into her shoulder as his hand ground up between her thighs. The sound made her gasp, sparks pricking faintly along her skin.
She shoved him.
He didnât move.
Instead, he kissed her neckâslow, open-mouthed, his breath catching against her collarbone. Another hitch. Another trembling breath. He groaned.
âIâm still itchy,â he whispered, congested and low, as if she didnât know. âMy nose is gonna run all over you if you donât stop me.â
She bared her teeth. âYou say that like Iâm supposed to flinch.â
He chuckled hoarsely and pulled her in tighter, hand now slipping beneath her waistband. Her breath hitched this time, a sound sharp and traitorous.
âYouâre dripping,â he groaned, kissing the corner of her mouth. âSo sensitive. What, the sneeze-kink kicking in now? Or just me being a sweaty, pollen-covered disaster?â
âI hate you.â
âLiar.â
Then he picked her up.
Not a bridal sweep. Not a reckless grab.
Just both hands at the backs of her thighs, lifting her up with that quiet, reverent strength he never showed unless he was about to do something utterly filthy in the softest way possible. Her legs wrapped around his waist automatically, one arm gripping the back of his neck, the other twisting in the collar of his robe.
He carried her.
Through the hallway, slow and focused, one kiss at a time up the length of her throat. Sneezed again into her shoulder mid-stride, breath stifled, one-handed as his other arm held her tight.
âhhuhâtCHHHzzuh!ângh, fuckâsorry.â
âYouâre not sorry.â
âI really, really am not.. Hihhhâ HihhâEXTSHâue! hHâEiSCHâiiew!!â
He bumped the bedroom door open with his shoulder and set her down in the middle of their ridiculous velvet-covered bed. The sheets were half-askew from earlier. The pillow with her initials stitched in silver thread still carried the faint print of her cheek from the morning.
He took a moment to look at her. To drink her in.
Then he peeled her shirt up and off with both hands, dragging the fabric slow over her arms, her chest, her head, until she sat bare in the amber glow, flushed and goosepimpled and already breathless.
She lay back slowly, her thighs falling open, her hair a halo of red against the pillows, and stared at him with half-lidded eyes.
He let the robe fall off his shoulders.
Then knelt between her legs.
He had her spread across the bed, thighs parted, every inch of her flushed and glistening in the amber light. The window was cracked just enough for the wind to breeze through, teasing her nipples to stiff peaks, stirring the scent of flowers and smoke from his skin.
Rexar knelt between her legs, panting, trembling slightly with each building sneeze he fought back. His nose was twitching, breath hitching againâ
He nuzzled against her inner thigh. âFuck, babe⊠âm gonna⊠hhuhâGXTCHHHuhh!! Huhh⊠hhâGCHHzzuhh!! HuhâTCHHHHHuhhh!!â
Three more. Each one fired into the sheets, chest jerking, sparks dying against the damp heat of her skin. She whimpered, fingers curling in the sheets.
âGods, Rexââ
âYou like that?â he murmured against her slick heat, nose dragging along her folds. âLike how itchy I am for you? How fuckinâ full my nose is from that damn thistle you left blooming for me?â
Her hips bucked.
He grinned, and sneezed againâright into her, catching it low into her inner thigh, sparks sizzling against the dampness there. She choked on a cry.
âBreathe through it,â he whispered, voice ruined and hoarse and so goddamn loving. âLet me wreck you.â
She tried. She really tried.
But he had his mouth on her then, tongue sliding up through her folds with unbearable slowness. Every kiss was shaky with congestion, with suppressed breath, and every few seconds he pausedâ
âhhuhâGCHHHuhhh!! hhâTSCHCHuhhh!! HehhâkGTCHZzuhhh!!â
âand her whole body lit up when the sparks ghosted over her slick, trembling skin. She bit her knuckles, trying to hold it in.
âStop pretending you donât love this,â he murmured, mouth wet with her. âYouâre so fuckinâ wet, babygirl, and youâre twitching every time I sneezeââ
She let out a sobbing laugh. âIâm gonna kill you.â
âNo,â he said, licking again, voice gone breathless and raw, âyouâre gonna cum for me.â
She did.âšHard.âšHer whole body curled, thighs squeezing around his head as he sneezed again, stifled into her core this time, sparks flickering like a climax of their own.
She gasped, choked, tried to push him back, but he stayed thereâtongue still languid, still lapping at every aftershock like he hadnât just been dragged under by her tremble. One hand anchored on her thigh, the other smoothing soothing circles into her hipbone.
âBabeâfuckâRexâtoo muchââ
He growled, hoarse and sweet and utterly devoted. âNo such thing.â
His nose rubbed up along the swollen, oversensitive skin again and her entire body jerked.
âhuhâTCHHHuhhh!! hhuhâNGCHZZhhuhh!! hhuhHhâkTSCHzzh!â
Another set. He barely lifted his face in time. The wet heat of each stifled sneeze splashed between her thighs, glowing sparks fizzing harmlessly in the slickness still coating her skin. She whimpered and twitched.
âStill sensitive?â he murmured, nuzzling her hip, sniffling shamelessly. âYouâre shaking.â
She tried to glare at him. âAnd youâre still fully clothed.â
âEasily fixed,â he croaked.
He kissed up her belly, slow and reverent, dragging his stubble across every line of tension. Then upâsternum, throat, mouth. She pulled him in with both hands, kissing him filthy, still tasting herself on his tongue. His nose rubbed against her cheek, still twitching.
He rolled his hips forward against her thigh. She felt the heat, the pulse, the twitch behind the cotton. He was burning up. Sniffling. Twitchy. Holding back.
Not for long.
âInside,â she growled. âNow.â
He didnât argue.
He reached down, shoved his underwear low with a shaky hand, and groaned as he pressed the tip against her entrance. Her walls were still fluttering, still soaking. She could feel the thickness of him, the gentle quiver of his muscles as he lined himself up, the hitch in his breathâ
He buried his face in her neck and sneezed hard, one hand braced beside her head, the other gripping her thigh with reverent desperation. Sparks danced across her shoulder, and thenâhe pushed in.
Slow.
Thick.
Stretching her open with maddening control.
He was inside her now, slow and deep, his hips grinding in that maddening rhythm she could never fully prepare for. His chest hovered over hers, hot and damp and flexing every time he sneezedâ
âhhuhâTCHHHuhhh!! hhhhânkCHZZhhuh!! hhuhâETSCHHHHhhuhhh!!â
âright above her, into her neck, his voice cracked and reverent as he buried his face there.
âIâm trying not to burn the sheets,â he gasped, every thrust making her tremble.
âYou wonât,â she panted, fingers tangled in his hair.
âI will,â he moaned, nuzzling her collarbone, voice so sweet it shattered her. âYouâre too fuckinâ pretty. Itâs distracting.â
She clenched around him at that.
He groaned so deep it shook her.
âYou feel that?â he murmured, sniffling as he rocked into her again. âThat heat? Thatâs me, Princess. Thatâs all me.â
Her hips rose to meet him.
âI canâtââ she gasped, âRexâRexarââ
He leaned in, forehead pressed to hers, nose flaring again.
âhhuhâTSCHHhhuhhh!! hhhHâTCHSSHHuhhh!! Hehh⊠HhuhâtCHZZhhhuhh!!â
He barely caught them in time, twisting just enough to stifle the burning edge into the pillow beside her, fire crackling harmlessly across her shoulder in faint, dying sparks. She felt every jolt of itâhis breath shaking, muscles clenching, body flushed and twitching over hers like he was coming apart at the seams.
And thenâhe kissed her.
Desperate. Open-mouthed. Hot and trembling. A kiss like he was trying to breathe her in, like her mouth was the only steady thing he had left to hold onto. His nose brushed hers, still twitching faintly, his chest rising in that shaky, rhythm-breaking way she was starting to recognize.
She barely got the breath to whimper before he thrust into her againâlong, hard, a full-body push that made her cry out, hips jerking, fingers fisting in the sheets as her whole body fluttered around him. He gasped her name into her neck, his voice wrecked and thick and reverent. She felt him surge, the ragged rhythm falling apart as he spilled inside her with one final, guttural exhaleâ
âhhuhâGCHHHuhhh!! HâeSTCHâiu!â Hhâ! Hahhâ! HaHâtTSCHhiew!!â
The next few seconds blurredâslick heat, tangled limbs, and his chest trembling with aftershocks. And thenâ
He was still inside her.
Still moving.
Still falling apart in the most controlled way imaginable.
Slow and deep now, maddeningly so, his hips rolling with that familiar rhythm that always wrecked her, grinding down in lazy, claiming strokes that made her head tip back against the pillow. His chest hovered just over hers, broad and sweat-damp, flexing with every breath, every hitchâevery time he failed to fully smother the itch clawing through him.
The sneezes tore from him helplessly, each one jerking through his body, forcing his hips deeper every time he lost control. She moaned under him, soft and broken, each sound pulled out of her with every sudden thrust, with every trembling exhale he tried to bury in her skin.
Her hands roamed over his back, nails skimming over the ridges of sweat-slicked muscle, over the faint shiver that ran down his spine as he triedâgods, he triedâto keep it together. But it was slipping. She could feel it in every ragged breath, every shaky grind of his hips, every desperate mutter of her name between fits.
And she loved it.
He was trying to hold it together for her, as always. But his breath kept hitching, his rhythm faltering with every wet, pollen-torn inhale.
Still, he moved. Deep. Steady. Worshipful.
Their bodies met in slow, rhythmic rolls, the slick heat between her thighs welcoming every inch of him, drawing him deeper with each stroke. The friction was perfect. Her legs wrapped tight around his waist, heels digging into his back as he pressed flush against her, their bellies slick and sliding together with each grind of his hips.
âFuck, Kriia,â he rasped, his voice frayed and needy. âYou feelâhhuhâtCHSSHHuh!âso fucking good.â
She moaned beneath him, dragged her hands through his curls, brushed the damp fringe from his forehead. âKeep going. Donât stop.â
âI wasnât gonna,â he groaned. His thrusts grew harder for a moment, his control briefly buckling under the weight of her voice. âNot âtil you fall apart again.â
She clenched around him at that, and he felt itâgasped into her throat and bucked, nearly losing it right then. His body was fire and velvet and trembling devotion, every movement driven by how she sounded, how she felt, how her nails raked down his spine and how her breath hitched every time his nose brushed her cheek.
âhhuhâTCHHHuhhh!!ââšRight into her neck again.âšSparks danced over her collarbone.âšShe gasped, hips jerking up to meet him.
âRexâ!â
âI know, I know,â he panted, nose twitching again, red and swollen and running. âJust hold onto me. Wanna make youâfuckâhhuhâGKCHHzzuhh!âwanna make you come so hard you forget your name.â
Her eyes fluttered. Her body was already shivering, already close.
âIâI canâtââ
âYes you can. For me, baby. One more.â
His hand slid between them, thumb pressing against her clit, stroking in tight circles as he kept fucking her through his own wheezing, sneezing fits, sparks flying in tiny bursts every time he lost control of a breath. The overstimulation made her twitch violentlyâpleasure gathering in that sharp, slow-coiling place inside her, the one he always found like he had a map written in her skin.
She was whimpering now, soft and breathy and utterly undone, mouth open in helpless little cries as he kept murmuring, kept thrusting, kept praising.
âSo good for me⊠fuck, youâre perfect⊠hhuhâTSCHHHuhh!âgonna make me come if you keep squeezing like thatââ
She cried out as it hit her.
Her back arched. Her legs locked. She shook beneath him, every nerve ending lit and drenched, voice cracking as the orgasm tore through her. He caught her with both arms, held her down as her body bucked against his, thrusting deeper into her with every pulse of her climax, every flutter of those tight inner muscles drawing him in like they knew he belonged there.
He didnât last a second longer.
His rhythm stuttered once, then broke completely as he groaned her name and spilled into her in hot, endless pulses. His whole body trembled, chest pressed to hers, sweat dripping from his nose as he buried his face into her neck again.
He sneezed one more tripleââhhuhhâTCHhhzzh! hehhâ! HihhâEXTSHâue! HIIHâNKXSHH!ââas he collapsed gently over her, mouth still panting against her shoulder, body twitching with aftershocks.
They stayed like that for a long time.
Not speaking. Not moving. Just breathing.
Her fingers combed slowly through his hair, brushing sweat-damp curls from his temple, dragging down his spine in lazy strokes. His arms cradled her close like she was something precious, something fragile even though sheâd just taken him apart with nothing but her thighs and a breathy curse.
Rexar sniffled.
She kissed his forehead.
âStill with me?â she whispered.
âMmmâŠâ He half-laughed, half-moaned. âJust barely. My soul is in the Sniffle Thistle now.â
She snorted. âDramatic.â
He nuzzled into her breast, voice muffled. âYou love it.â
âI tolerate it.â
He smirked against her skin. âI love you.â
She froze for a momentâjust a breathâand then tucked his face tighter against her chest.
ââŠI love you too, dumbass.â
He exhaled. Content.
Then sneezed again. Soft. Muffled against her skin.
âetâtCHOO!! hahâESSHHâIUE! huhâTSCHHHuhhh!â
She ran a hand through his hair again. âBless you.â
His reply was a barely-audible: âFor you babygirl⊠always.â
The End âš
@SpecialK posted:
Tried to take a cute little selfie after the storm passedâended up catching myself mid-glow, half-ruined, and very aware of how flushed I still was. đ„
Was it the aftermath of a long, drawn-out fit? Maybe. Was I still twitchy the entire time I took this? âŠAbsolutely. đ«
You can practically feel the tension behind my eyes in this one, canât you? That ticklish sort of ache that hasnât broken yetâjust lingers, heavy, waiting to snap again. Bet you canât stop watching my breath, wondering if this was the second before another one hit.
And before you askâno, I didnât clean up before taking this. I wanted you to see what you did to me, Sparky. Wanted you squirming in your seat wondering how wet the next one was, or how many times I twitched before I finally broke on camera. đ
Tell meâdid you flinch? Or are you biting your lip and playing this on loop already? đ
#sneezyselfie #postfit #congestionqueen #kinkpic #camodoll #breathplayadjacent #notclean #ruinedandglowing #sparkycantbreathe

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Been wanting to write some Vaelyn & Rexar lately but I haven't seen any good band prompts recently đđ
A Ritual Of Ruin
written & illustrated by allergeez âš
Summary: When two lovers with a taste for control, ritual, and sensory surrender retreat into the privacy of their shared space, the night becomes a carefully orchestrated dance of breath, fire, and tension. In a world where shadows bend to will and heat answers devotion, Kriia and Rexar push each other to their delicious limitsâtesting patience, power, and how far desire can go before it breaks them both.
A story of slow torment, sacred trust, and worship through ruin, this is not just sexâitâs ritual. And they wouldnât have it any other way. 6k words.
WARNING, NO PLOT, ONLY SMUT â This story contains explicit sexual content featuring consensual kink dynamics, including erotic sneezing (inducing and response), sensory play, edging, body worship, powerplay, and allergen-related overstimulation. Elements of filth and mess (non-hygienic, fetishized) are present throughout, as well as light degradation, ritualistic themes, and intense emotional dependency expressed through physical acts. Reader discretion is advised, especially for those sensitive to bodily fluids, breath play implications, or nontraditional kink expressions.
The bedroom was dim, cloaked in velvet shadow and amber flicker. Only a single candle sat ominously on the bedside table. It wasnât even lit yet, and still the scent of clove and cedar was already thick in the room, curling through the air like an incantation. It carried weight. Intention.
Kriia stood beside the bed like a priestess before the altar.
Her skin gleamed faintly in the low light, a pale canvas framed in crimson lace and black thigh straps. Her hair, red with streaks of soft shadow-ink, hung loose around her shoulders, damp at the ends from steam or sweat. A single bead of moisture rolled down the inside of her thigh and vanished into the hollow of muscle above her knee.
Rexar lay waiting.
Flat on his back across the thick black bedsheets, completely bare to her, his body was a map of heat and reverence. Every lineâevery scar and mark and smudge of old smokeâseemed etched there by want. His arms rested loosely at his sides, but his hands twitched every few seconds. Not from nerves. From restraint. From knowing exactly what was coming.
And what wasnât yet allowed to start.
âYouâre already glowing,â Kriia murmured, stepping one knee onto the mattress. âThatâs cheating.â
Rexarâs voice was low and slow. âYouâre already wet. Thatâs cheating twice.â
She smirked and crawled up over him, straddling his hips without letting their skin meet. Her thighs bracketed him perfectly, heat radiating downward but still not touchingânot yet. She sat back on her heels, hands resting on her own knees as if she were preparing to meditate. Her eyes never left his.
âReady?â she asked carefully.
He nodded. âDo it.â
She leaned sideways and took the candle from the table, reaching for the matchbook next to it.
But Rexar lifted one hand lazily, sparks flickering from his fingers.
The wick ignited with a crackle.
The flame flaredâtoo tall, too suddenâand then softened into a steady burn. Clove and cedar erupted into the room with intoxicating fullness now, hot and smoky, clinging instantly to skin and throat.
Kriia inhaled once and blinked slowly.
Then sniffled.
Just once. Subtle.
But her eyes gleamed.
âYou really want to start like this?â she murmured, cocking her head as the first tickle bloomed gently behind her nose.
Rexarâs lips curled, his eyes following every motion she made like he was watching a spell take shape. âI want to see what it does to you.â
âMmm.â She rolled her hips forward just enough to make him twitch. âYouâre a glutton for chaos.â
âIâm a glutton for you.â
Her breath fluttered. Not quite from arousal. Not yet. From that slow itch curling inside her sinuses like a candle of its own.
She sniffled again, knuckle brushing beneath her nose, eyes narrowing slightly.
âOh,â she whispered. âThatâs a strong one.â
âItâs the new blend,â Rexar replied, voice still calm but body already taut. âCedar. Clove. A little powdered starglass.â
âYouâre an asshole.â
He grinned.
âIâm your asshole.â
âYouâre about to be covered in sneeze spray.â
âPromise?â
That earned him a low chuckle.
Kriia rocked forward slightly, letting her thighs press against his hips. Still no contact at the coreâbut close. Enough to make him inhale sharply.
She placed her palms on his chest, fingers splaying across the ridges of muscle, skin warm beneath her hands. Thenâslowlyâshe leaned down.
Her breath grazed his sternum.
Her lips followed.
One kiss. Just below the collarbone.
Then a second, near his shoulder.
Then a third, just above the pulse at his throat.
Each one wet, lingering, reverent. Not rushed. Ritual.
Rexarâs eyes fluttered shut.
âThis is your fault,â she murmured against his skin.
âI accept responsibility,â he whispered back.
Kriia dragged her nose lightly along the edge of his collarbone, sniffled, then paused.
âStarting to tickleâŠâ
âYeah?â
Another kiss. This time under the curve of his jaw.
Her breath hitchedâjust slightly at firstâthen again, deeper, shakier. Her lips parted around a silent gasp, and her nostrils flared with a telltale twitch. She hovered close, letting her breath ghost over his chest, warm and uneven, sharp with the promise of release that never came.
Rexar's entire body tensed beneath her.
The anticipation was unbearableâwatching her hover, her face scrunched in struggle, lashes fluttering, the tip of her nose brushing faintly across his skin. Each sniffle sent a jolt through him. His fists clenched in the sheets as his eyes tracked every microexpression.
Then, without warning, her expression smoothed out. The sneeze backed off.
She gave a teasing little sigh of false relief.
And instead of pulling awayâshe dragged her tongue slowly up the center of his chest. A long, wet, sinuous line from the base of his sternum to just beneath his throat. Her nose nuzzled faintly alongside it, breath still trembly, her smirk growing with every inch.
Rexar groaned, hips bucking beneath her.
Kriia sat back on her heels with maddening slowness, breath shallow, nose twitching againâlike she could start the cycle all over.
âYouâre going to lose your mind,â she whispered.
He already was.
âGods,â Rexar breathed, already fully hard and twitching beneath her.
âYouâre twitchy,â she teased.
âYouâre divine.â
âMmm. Not yet. Soon.â
The candle sputtered briefly, throwing light across her faceâglassy eyes, flared nostrils, flushed cheeks. Her lips glistened.
Rexarâs voice dropped, a whisper between awe and hunger. âYouâre gonna fuckinâ kill me tonight.â
Kriia sniffled again, thicker now, breath fluttering.
She grinned.
âOh, Sparky. I havenât even started.â
Kriia moved like smokeâslow, fluid, curling downward without force or rush. She kissed along Rexarâs collarbone with a deliberate patience that made the air between them thrum. Her lips were soft but never tentative. She wasnât here to seduce him.
She was here to worship.
Rexar breathed in sharp through his nose as she found the hollow just beneath his throat and nipped there, the soft press of her teeth drawing a twitch from his thigh.
Kriia smiled against his skin. Her breath was already heavier. More effortful. Not from arousalânot entirely.
The candle was working.
The scent had grown thicker, heavier, humid with clove and cedar and the sweet, acrid burn of resin. It coated her tongue, filled her lungs, and curled with slow heat in the back of her sinuses. Her nose twitched again, just enough to crinkle.
Rexar noticed.
âAlready?â he murmured.
âMmhmm.â Her voice was velvet-slick, thick with promise. âDidnât take much, did it?â
He shook his head slightly, barely breathing.
Kriia sniffledâwet, subtle, involuntaryâand then dipped down again, lips dragging just to the left of his sternum. She paused there, letting her breath ghost across his skin. Rexar arched faintly, his fingers twitching by his sides, still obeying the no-touch rule she hadnât had to say aloud.
Another kiss. Then a long, slow lick that traced from the underside of his pec to the dip between his ribs. Her tongue left a hot trail, and her breathâalready catchingâmade it worse.
Kriiaâs nose flared subtly, and she pressed her cheek to his chest for a moment, eyes fluttering. âHhehh⊠RexâŠâ
His eyes flew open. âBabygirl?â
âI thhâ think Iâm gonnaââ She drew in a sharp breath, mouth parting, nose twitching with desperate little fluttersâthen exhaled.
â...Nope.â
The tickle backed off.
Rexar groaned, hips lifting impatiently. Needy.
Kriia laughed, her voice raspy and breathy as she kissed along the underside of his ribs.
âPoor thing,â she whispered. âThought I was gonna shower you already?â
âI hoped,â he admitted, eyes wild. âGods, youâre so fucking mean.â
She flicked her tongue against the edge of a muscle and let out a congested chuckle. âAnd youâre so easy.â
Another sniffle. This one wetter. She didnât wipe it. Let it hang in the air between them like a shared secret.
She moved slowly down his body, deliberately skipping over his nipples. Her lips hovered just above them, warm breath teasing their sensitivityâbut she didnât touch. Not yet. She licked down the space between them instead, letting her chin graze faintly over each peak like a hint of contact without release.
Rexar was shaking now, a fine tremble from tension.
âFuck, babygirl⊠Please,â he whispered.
But Kriia just sniffled again, rubbing the back of her wrist lazily under her nose as she moved back up along his sternum. Her face was pink now, eyes half-lidded and glassy, and her breaths came with that fluttering edge of desperation.
She tilted her head to the side and nipped him again, right beneath the collarbone.
Then moaned, soft and broken. âMmmnnh⊠Iâm gonna fall apart on you, SparkyâŠâ
Rexarâs breath hitched.
âRight over your chest,â she added, voice trembling with the coming storm. âSo messy. So helplessâŠâ
He groaned, body arching helplessly beneath her.
She kissed lower again. One long drag of her lips just under his nipple.
His hips jerked.
âYour nipples are so fucking cute,â Kriia murmured, voice hoarse and sin-sweet. âAll pink and tight and waitingâŠâ
âPrincessââ His tone was warning, half-begging, hips twitching as he braced for somethingâanythingâbut it didnât come.
âBut not yet,â she said, all honeyed malice.
Her lips trailed lower. She kissed beneath his ribcage, slow and soft. A reverent line of licks followed, each one damp and dragging. She nipped beside his navelâsharp, just enough to make him flinch.
Rexarâs hands balled into fists in the sheets, his jaw clenched. His cock jerked helplessly against his stomach, flushed dark, pulsing against skin that hadnât even been touched yet. He was already gasping, ruined by her restraint.
Kriiaâs breath hitched again.
This time, for real.
Her whole body locked for half a second, her nostrils twitching visibly.
âRexâRex, I think Iâm gonnaâŠ! HhhehhhâŠâ
He braced beneath her, muscles seizing.
âHere we go,â he whispered, anticipation curling tight in his gut.
âHuhhh⊠hahhh⊠n-noâŠâ
Her breath collapsed in on itself.
The tickle retreated yet againâcruel, smirking.
Kriia sniffled hard, loud and thick, blinking watery eyes down at him.
âTease,â Rexar growled, voice shredded. His thighs were trembling now from holding still. âYouâre such aâgodsâtease.â
âYou lit the candle,â she reminded him, lips quirking into a congested grin. âYou asked for this.â
âI asked to be drenched,â he hissed through gritted teeth. âNot edged like thisâfuckâŠâ
She moved back up his chest slowly, dragging her cheek across his skin with open affection, breath stuttering the entire way. He could feel itâher heat, her congestion, the helpless flutter of her breath rising and falling over his body.
âIâm so itchy,â she whispered, shivering with the rising tickle. âItâs building again⊠itâs right there. Right at the edgeâŠâ
She hovered above his nipple and pressed her mouth over itânot sucking, not licking. Just a soft seal of heat. Her breath quivered against his skin, and the tip of her nose brushed over the hardened bud.
It was hell.
Rexar bucked hard. âFuckingâBabygirl, Iâmââ
Her breath caught sharply. She stiffened. âHere it comesâŠâ
Rexarâs fingers clawed at the sheets.
ThenâKriia exhaled, congested and shaky, right across his nipple. No sneeze. Just a warm, rattling release of tension.
He groaned, boneless, crushed under the weight of almost.
She pulled back with a slow, smug grin.
âNow youâre just being fucking mean,â he whispered, voice utterly wrecked.
âThat was hot,â she corrected, her eyes glittering through allergy-haze.
He couldnât argue. Not really. His cock throbbed untouched against his stomach, flushed and slick with precum. Every inch of his skin felt sunburned with want.
Kriia sniffled againâwet and forcefulâand her breath hitched violently. Her whole expression shifted, pupils blown wide, lips parting in desperation.
âItâs c-comingâŠâ she gasped. âItâsâhhHhh⊠fuck, I c-canâtââ
Rexar growled low in his throat, one hand reaching to her hip, the other gripping the back of her thigh.
âLet it happen,â Rexar breathed, voice low and fraying. âPleaseâright hereâuse me.â
Kriia whimpered, congested and desperate, eyes fluttering shut as she leaned in. Her breath hitched audibly, her whole frame trembling with the strain of holding it back. She dipped her head slowly and brought her twitching nose down to his chest.
Thenâdeliberatelyâshe rubbed the tip of her nose in slow, teasing circles over his nipple.
Rexar gasped.
The soft, wet drag of her breath against that sensitive skin sent shivers straight through him. Her nose twitched again, gently grazing the budâback and forth, barely a touch, just enough to stir sensation. Her inhales were shallow now, chest heaving, mouth parted as she chased the sneeze down.
âJustânnnhhâneed a little more,â she moaned. âRex, itâs right thereââ
He was panting beneath her, fists clenched tight in the sheets, every nerve waiting for the break.
She gave another slow rubâup, over, around the hardening peakâher nose flushed pink, twitching harder with every pass. Her breath began to flutter in rhythm with the motion.
âHhhuhhhâhhâhihhhânghhâ!â
She gasped sharply.
And then it hit.
âHhâNgktCHhh!!âHhhâtKTCHh!!â
The first sneeze burst out of her mid-rub, no resistance left. It snapped her forward, spraying hot and wet across his chest. A second came instantly, even messier, her breath catching on the release.
Her body rocked with the force of themâhips grinding down helplessly into his.
Rexar moaned aloud, eyes wide, undone.
âFuck, Princessâyesââ
She groaned against his chest, sniffling thickly, and pressed her face into the sticky warmth sheâd left behind.
âFeels so fucking goodâŠâ she mumbled. âI could keep going⊠let me ruin youâŠâ
Rexar moaned.
He swore he felt it deep in his spine, like his nerves had lit from the inside out.
Kriia collapsed forward with a gasp and another stifle, mess landing warm and glistening across his sternum.
âHuhâNGXCHh!âkâtchhh!âhhâNGXT!â
Each sneeze bent her forward, spraying his chest with visible mist. The first was massive, the second tight, the third sudden and dripping with relief. Her mouth parted after, panting hard.
Rexar shuddered. âOh my gods.â
She licked a droplet from his collarbone with lazy indulgence. âMmmh. Messy.â
âYou are.â
âI know.â
She pressed her cheek against his chest again, breathing fast and wet and satisfied.
Rexarâs hands moved on instinctâgliding up along Kriiaâs thighs, following the slick heat of her skin until they reached her waist. He gripped her there, trembling, trying to pull her down, to guide her hips, to take back just a little control.
Kriia didnât allow it.
With one sharp shift of her weight, she pressed his wrists flat against the mattress, pinning him hard, her palms warm and commanding.
âAht Aht AhhhâŠ,â she whispered, her breath thick with congestion. âYou lit the candle. Youâre mine until I say.â
Her hips resumed their rhythm, slow and sinuous, grinding against the thick, flushed line of him with devastating friction. Each pass left a new streak of slickness across his skin, coating him, marking him. Her breath came in open-mouth gasps now, interrupted by sniffles and hitched, ticklish inhales.
Rexar writhed beneath her, sweat beading down his temples, chest slick with mess from her earlier fits and the ghost of more to come.
Kriia lowered her face over his again, breath hot and staggered, just close enough for her twitching nose to brush along the sharp line of his jaw. She nuzzled there, tender at firstâthen exhaled slow and heavy, a teasing drag of heat that mimicked the build-up of a sneeze.
Rexar growled, the sound buried in his throat. His jaw clenched, body arching up into her, straining for more.
âFuck, BabydollâŠâ His voice was wreckedâhungry, reverent, almost furious with need.
Her laugh cracked through the air, ragged and wet. âYou thought I was gonna⊠didnât you?â
He met her eyes, wide and dark with worship. âI donât care. Just do it. Do whatever you wantâjust keep going.â
She purred, low and sharp. âOh, I will,â she rasped.
She let go of his wrists, but Rexar didnât stay still out of surrenderâhe stayed still out of devotion, letting her do what she wanted, needing her to finish it. His hands hovered at her hips, tight with restraint, every muscle coiled and ready to worship the second she let him.
âDrench me,â he breathed. âYouâre a fucking goddess like this.â
Her eyes glittered.
She moved lower again.
And he offered himself.
She sat upright, rolling her hips in a torturous rhythm, letting every part of her body rub against hisâslick, fevered, trembling with effort.
The candleâs scent was thick enough to taste now.
Clove and cedar, twisted with resin and heat and sweat. Her nose twitched sharply, uncontrollably.
Her breath stuttered mid-grind.
âHhhihhhâHângKTCHhh!â
She sneezed suddenly, explosively, the wet spray misting down over his chest. A second followed fast:
âNngKTsh!â
Rexar groaned, his hips jerking upward hard.
Kriia laughed breathily, wiping her nose with the back of her hand, smearing the mess down her forearm.
âGods, that got you.â
âThat got in my mouth,â he panted.
Her smile turned wicked. âDid it?â
âYes. Gods, yes.â
She leaned in, dragging her tongue across his lower lip. âGood.â
She was losing control. They both felt it. Her breath was shallower now, more labored. Every little movement made her nose twitch. Every grind of her hips drew out a sniffle, or a gasp, or the threat of another fit.
Kriia moaned as she ground herself harder into him. âStill t-tickling⊠I cahhânât stop it nowâŠâ
Her breath hitched again.
Rexar felt her thighs tense, her muscles tighten around him. And thenâ
âHângCHhh! Kâtchh! Hhângchh!â
The force of it doubled her forward, her hips rocking in a sudden jolt that made him cry out. Her sneezes came mid-thrust, timed with every motion of her body, spraying his neck, his chest, his mouth.
She groaned, voice thick. âI canât even hHehhhâhold them b-back anymoreâŠâ
âDonât,â he whispered. âDonât even try.â
Her rhythm stuttered now, no longer perfectly controlled. She moved in erratic rolls, chasing her own breath, riding the edge of the next wave. Every few seconds, her breath would catch, and then:
âNgkTCHh!âKâpttchh!âhhâgTShhh!â
His face was wet with it.
And he wanted it.
Her hair stuck to her cheeks, her nose running now without pause. She rubbed it messily against his throat, letting the congestion smear as she moaned and bit him lightly in the crook of his neck.
Rexar grabbed her hips and held tight, guiding her rhythm nowâbut not in dominance. Not fully.
In desperation.
âYouâre incredible,â he gasped.
âIâm disgusting,â she laughed, voice slurred with congestion.
âYouâre perfect.â
She kissed him, sloppy and wet, breathless and raw.
Then broke the kiss with another fit, right against his cheek.
âHâNxtchh!âHhâgSCHhh!â
Rexarâs fingers dug into her thighs.
She growled, low and hot. âYou gonna cum just from this?â
âIâI think soâfuckâKriiâŠâ
She started grinding faster now, chasing friction with abandon. Her breath came fast and shallow, her moans blending with half-hitched build-ups.
Every few seconds sheâd pauseânose twitching, brows furrowingâand let out another sneeze mid-movement:
âHnâKCHhh! Kâtshh! NnkCHhh! HhâNgsh!â
The unpredictability drove him wild. The wetness, the mess, her stuttering loss of controlâit all built and built and built.
He bucked up harder, chasing it.
Kriiaâs voice was barely a whisper now, heavy with arousal and allergy haze. âIâm gonna r-ride you through itâgonna c-cum on you, cover youâhhnâCHHkktt!â
The sneeze broke her words, made her hips stutter. Her skin shimmered faintly with sweat in the dim candlelight, hips rocking in slow, teasing circles against his.
Every motion made his cock twitch beneath herâslick, trapped between their bodies, painted with heat and mess and shadowlight.
âStill with me?â she murmured, voice hoarse, her nose brushing the underside of his jaw.
Rexarâs fingers dug into her thighs again, less from force now, more from anchoring. âBarely.â
âGood,â Kriia whispered. âStay right there.â
She kissed him onceâslow, open-mouthed, deep with adoration. Her lips tasted like salt, like want, like the last hour of teasing and torment and surrender. She shifted up, bracing herself with one arm beside his head.
Thenâwithout fanfareâshe lowered herself onto him.
Rexar choked on his breath.
It wasnât rough. It wasnât quick.
She took him inch by inch, wet and flushed and utterly intentional, letting every curve of her body mold to him like shadow over flame. Her head tipped back as she settled fully, the warmth of him seated deep inside her. A slow groan spilled from her throat, thick and low, and her hips gave a gentle, involuntary twitch.
Rexarâs mouth fell open.
âFfâfuck, babygirlâŠâ
Her eyes were heavy-lidded, glowing slightly in the candlelight. âI can feel you,â she murmured. âAll of you. Every pulseâŠâ
He could only nod.
She sat there for a moment, hips pressed flush to his, letting their bodies memorize the shape of each otherâletting the moment draw long and slow. Her breath hitched again, this time unplanned, and her nostrils twitched mid-exhale.
âOhh⊠mmnnh, fuck⊠I câcanât stop it nowâŠâ
She tried to grind again, slow and steadyâbut her breath caught halfway through, and her body jolted as a sneeze ripped free without warning.
âNngâtchh!â
It rocked them together.
Rexar gasped.
Kriia let out a half-laugh, half-moan, then braced herself better.
âI warned youâŠâ
She moved againârocking forwardâand another sneeze wracked her, snapping her body into his.
âKâtchhh!âohhh godsângâCHHhh!â
The momentum of each sneeze jolted her hips, shoved Rexar deeper into her, the messy pressure overwhelming him in flashes of pleasure and helplessness. His hands balled into fists the sheets now, voice gone breathless.
âPrincessâI canâtâgods, Iâm gonnaâfuckââ
She exhaled sharply and moved harder.
Her rhythm wasnât smooth nowâit was unpredictable, ruled by breath and reflex. Sheâd grind into him, her pace erratic, her body jerking every time the next fit bubbled up inside her. Her nose was running openly now, flushed bright pink, and her breath trembled constantly.
She whimpered against his throat. âCanât⊠canât even f-fight themâŠâ
And thenâanother burst:
âNkâchh! HhâNGchh!âNgKCHh!â
Rexar sobbed, a sound caught between a cry and a moan. âYesâbabygirl, fuckâpleaseâdonât stopââ
She didn't.
She rode him in frantic fits and starts, every movement accompanied by sniffles, shallow moans, and the tension of buildup that never got a chance to resolve. Her voice cracked around every word.
âThis is⊠hhhahhâso filthyâg-gods, you feelâhhuhhâso goodââ
Each sneeze sent her crashing forward, bracing on his chest, her hair falling around their faces like a curtain.
âNchh! HâtsshkT! NnKâtchh!â
Some sprayed his chest. Some his neck. One landed directly across his cheekâand instead of flinching, he moaned, nearly bucking off the bed.
âIâm gonnaâBabygirl, Iâm gonna cumâpleaseââ
âTogether,â she gasped.
She clutched his shoulders and moved fasterâraw, desperate. The slick mess between them grew unbearable, friction melting into fire. Her breath was nothing but hitching now, fit after fit crashing into her in erratic bursts:
âKtchh!âNktâchhh!âhhâgSsshkkkt!!âffuckâRexâNnâgTCHHh!!â
Their bodies met again and again, soaking each other in pleasure and ruin, scent and sweat and sound.
When it cameâit was everything.
Rexarâs back arched, hips driving into her as his body gave out in a wave of pulsing, hot release. He growled her name, voice cracked and reverent. His hands clung to her like she was the only thing keeping him tethered to the world.
Kriia shattered seconds later.
Not quietly. Not gently.
Her orgasm hit between sneezesâexplosive and deepâher thighs tightening around him, her entire body pulsing with it as she uttered a near-pornstar-esque moan, half-laughed, half-sobbed into his throat.
She sneezed through it.
âHhâ! HâNNgtchh!âaAAHhhâfuhhhckkâhhâGSCHH!!â
And still she moved, wringing every last second of pleasure from both of them, hips slowing only when they could no longer do more than twitch.
She collapsed against him.
Their bodies stuck together with heat and slick and breathlessness.
Neither spoke.
They couldnât yet.
Only the candle spoke now, soft and steady in the dark, its smoke curling gently above them like the last thread of ritual incense.
The only sound was the slowing, syncopated rhythm of their breathâRexarâs chest rising beneath Kriiaâs cheek, her soft sniffles echoing in the candlelit silence. Their bodies were sticky with sweat, smeared with every spasm of pleasure and mess, and absolutely motionless. Melted into one another.
Kriia exhaled, a lazy puff of warmth across his ribs.
Rexar shifted just slightly beneath her, his arms curling around her bare back like a cocoon. His palms were still tremblingâbarelyâbut he pressed them to her skin as if grounding himself to her was the only thing keeping his soul from wandering.
Kriia was the first to move. Slowly, languidly, she rubbed her noseâstill twitchingâagainst his sternum and let out a sleepy, gurgling sniffle. Then, with no ceremony, she wiped her face against his chest, smearing the wetness sheâd left behind further across him like the worldâs most intimate signature.
Rexar huffed a breathy laugh, more air than sound.
âThat,â he murmured, voice still shaky, âmightâve been the filthiest thing weâve ever done.â
Kriia just hummed, congested and content. âYou say that every time we do this.â
His hand came up to brush damp hair from her face, fingers gentle, reverent. He cupped her cheek in his palm, his thumb stroking the edge of her jaw.
âYou get prettier every time it happens,â he said softly. âitâs not fair.â
Her lips curved against his skin. âEven like this?â
âEspecially like this.â
Her nose twitched again. âGods. I still f-feel it.â
âI can tell. Here.â He leaned up and kissed her foreheadâslow, soft, and lingering, before reaching out with one hand and stuffing the lid of the candle over the flame, snuffing out the culprit. Her skin was fever-warm, her breath catching under his lips. âStill tickling?â
âMmm,â she sniffled, eyes half-lidded. âLike it settled in now. Deep.â
âThen we definitely did it right.â
She groaned in mock horror and curled into him tighter, throwing a leg over his hip. âStop. No more compliments. My soulâs melting.â
He smirked against her hair. âNext time, Iâm lighting two candles.â
Kriia shoved at his chest with a pitiful little whine. âDonât you dare.â
âOh, I dare.â
âI will explode.â
âYou already diiiiiid.â
She giggled softly and coughed into his neck. Her voice was barely a whisper nowâraspy and exhausted, but warm. âYouâre such a menace.â
He just held her tighter. âYouâre my chaos.â
They lay like that for a long time. Not speaking. Not moving. The scent of the candle had settled into the sheets, into their skin, woven into every lazy breath they took. Rexar pressed little kisses to her temple, her cheek, her shoulder. No urgency. Just reverence.
Kriia purred, her hand trailing slow spirals over his chest. âDidnât think itâd be that good.â
âI did,â he said simply.
Her lips twitched. âCocky.â
âNo.â He turned her chin gently so she was looking at him. His voice lowered. âI just know what happens when you let go.â
Her throat bobbed.
He kissed her again, softer this time. Almost shy. âYouâre so fucking beautiful when you fall apart.â
Kriiaâs lashes fluttered. Her fingers curled around his wrist.
âYouâre not bad at worshipping, you know,â she whispered.
âI had a good teacher.â
âMmm. Youâre still mine, you know. Next time, I want to edge you with just breath. No hands. No hips. Just me sniffing and sneezing until you beg.â
His eyes fluttered shut with a shiver. âGods.â
âAnd youâre lighting the candle again.â
He groaned. âThought you said youâd explode.â
âI will. Thatâs the fun.â
He kissed her again, a smile against her lips. âThen Iâll hold you while you do.â
Her eyes drifted shut again, slow and heavy. The adrenaline had worn off. The shadows in the room stretched like long arms, curling slowly over the bed, wrapping them in quiet warmth.
Kriia sighed into the silence. âWe should shower.â
âMmm.â
âEventually.â
âEventually,â he echoed.
She coughed once, a soft sound in the hush.
Rexar smoothed a hand down her spine, slow and loving. âYou okay?â
âYeah,â she murmured. âJust floaty.â
âGood floaty?â
She nodded against his shoulder. âPerfect floaty.â
He pulled the blanket up over her slowly, covering the mess instead of wiping it away. âStay right there.â
âI wasnât planning to move.â
The candle flickered again, the shadows deepening.
Kriia nuzzled against him, her fingers still resting against the center of his chest where sheâd pressed her nose earlier. âYouâre disgusting.â
âYou love it.â
âI do.â
They lay in silence, heartbeats aligned. No more teasing. No more words. Just two kinksters, spent and tangled, adoring and adored, held in a sacred ruin of their own making.
And when Rexar was finally able to catch his breath, Kriia was already half-asleep in his arms, snoring softly with a stuffy nose.
Rexar kissed her hair one last time, fingers stroking gently through the damp strands tangled around her sharply pointed elven ears.
âI love you, menace,â he whispered, voice barely more than a breath.
Kriia made a sound in replyâlow and congested, but unmistakably fond.
âLove you more,â she rasped, thick with sleep and aftermath.
A quiet stillness settled between them. Not empty. Just full.
The kind of silence that came after worship, after ritual, after bodies had been bared in every way that mattered. Kriiaâs shadows curled around the edges of the bed like a barrier, like a spell meant to preserve this moment for just the two of them.
A faint trail of smoke still lingered in the room, mingling with sweat and shadowfire and the warm, fading scent of clove.
Rexar didnât sleep right away. He watched herâher features soft in sleep, her breath catching slightly with the last traces of congestion, her brows twitching faintly in some half-dreamed memory of chaos. He ran his thumb across her cheekbone, kissed her temple, and tucked her tighter against him.
Only then did he let himself drift.
Time passed without measure.
Somewhere between night and not-quite-morning, Kriia stirred.
A soft, restless groan pushed from her lips as she blinked awake, sluggish and fuzzy, nestled in the shelter of Rexarâs arms. Her head felt heavy and warm, skin damp and sticky beneath the blankets, and her sinuses still buzzed faintly from the aftermath.
She sniffled once, then againâwet and involuntaryâand gave a pathetic little whimper.
âMmh.â She buried her face deeper into his chest, voice muffled and thick. âIâm gross.â
Rexar stirred, still half-asleep, and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.
âYouâre ethereal,â he murmured, voice low and full of sleep.
âEthereal and snot-covered,â she mumbled, sniffling.
âExactly.â He sat up slowly, sweeping strands of damp hair off her cheek. His touch was feather-light. Devoted. âWhich is why itâs time.â
Kriia cracked one bleary eye. âTime?â
âFor your royal bath.â
Her snort turned into a congested cough. âYouâre ridiculous.â
âIâm reverent,â he corrected. âAnd you, High Priestess of Wrecked Temples and Allergic Destruction, are overdue for a cleansing.â
She groaned as he lifted her bridal-style from the mattress, ignoring the stickiness between their bodies, the mess streaked across their torsos, and the still-lingering scent of clove and cedar that clung like incense after ritual.
The bathroom was already dim-litâKriiaâs shadows moving ahead of them, curling fluidly around knobs, adjusting the water, guiding steam up into the air like ritual smoke. The scent here was different. Clean, soft, herbal. Something calming. Free of clove.
âYou planned this,â Kriia accused, resting against his shoulder with a lazy smirk.
âAlways,â Rexar said simply, the low flick of fire still simmering in his hands as he kissed her hair.
He set her on the tile like she was made of glass, one hand steady at her waist as he pulled off what little she still woreâbra, thigh straps, the remnants of her god-tier persona now drooping with moisture and aftermath.
The water was perfectâhot, but not scalding, steam rising in long fingers as he coaxed her beneath it.
Kriia let out a choked sigh as the first jets hit her back. Her eyes slipped closed, and her shoulders sagged.
âMmh gods, yesâŠâ
Rexar moved behind her without a word, reaching for a cloth and soaking it in the streaming warmth. He started with her shouldersâgentle, slow circlesâwiping away sweat, stickiness, candle smoke remnants. Then her back. Down her spine. Across her hips.
Every motion was quiet worship.
He kissed the nape of her neck, lips trailing to her shoulder as he worked. âYouâve never looked more ruined.â
âFlatterer,â she whispered, congested but melting.
Then came her arms. Her thighs. Her calves. He touched her like she was something sacred, not just his lover but his altar.
âTurn,â he said softly.
She did.
Her eyes met hisâglassier than usual, rimmed pink, but still sharp with the faded edge of mischief.
âYouâre a mess,â he murmured, brushing his thumb gently beneath her eye, catching the smudge of tears and exhaustion.
âFeel like one,â she rasped. âThose damn candles hit hardâŠâ
âLet me take care of it.â
He lifted her chin with reverence, then leaned in and kissed herâslow, soft, nothing hungry. Just contact. Just breath and closeness, like a balm whispered across raw skin.
Then he reached for the shampoo.
She gave a noise somewhere between a laugh and a groan. âYouâre gonna wash my hair?â
âYes.â
âLike, hands in it and everything?â
âEspecially that part.â
âYouâre serious?â
Rexar smiled. âIâm Rexar Fucking Fang. You think Iâm letting you go to sleep with a sinus-triggering allergy nest in your hair?â
She laughed harderâwet, sniffling, amused. âGods, youâre absurd.â
And then she closed her eyes, sighed, and tilted her head back in surrender.
âOkay then, Sparky. Make me feel like royalty.â
So he did.
His fingers slid into her hair with reverence, working through the knots, massaging her scalp with gentle, rhythmic motions. Bubbles bloomed between his hands, thick and aromatic, carrying away sweat, smoke, and the last whisper of the candleâs evil magic.
Kriia moaned.
Soft. Happy. Almost drowsy.
âDonât stop.â
âNever,â he said.
He rinsed the shampoo in slow, soaking waves, watching the lather flow down the curve of her back. Then came conditioner, and he took his time, rubbing it through strand by strand, careful to avoid tugging or pulling.
When her hair was clean, he turned his attention to her face.
âCan I?â
She blinked at him. âI must look a disaster.â
âYou look like a goddess who just conquered a continent.â
She snorted again. âSure. Conquered it with snot.â
He smiled, so tender it made her breath catch.
âLet me take care of you.â
She nodded once.
He wet a fresh cloth and cupped her jaw in one hand, dabbing around her nose, her lips, her cheeks. Cleaning what her sneeze fits had left behind. She didnât even flinch. She let him. Let herself be seen. Be cleaned.
âBlow,â he whispered.
She did, a productive blow gurgling thickly into the cloth with zero shame.
He kissed her temple as she finished.
âYouâre perfect,â he said against her hair.
âIâm disgusting.â
âBoth can be true.â
Her smile faded into something softer.
âWhy do you like this part so much?â she asked quietly. âThe mess. The chaos. Me, like thisâŠâ
He paused, letting his hand rest against her cheek. âBecause itâs you unfiltered. Because every twitch, every sneeze, every breathâitâs you letting go. Giving yourself to me.â
Her eyes welled upânot with allergies this time.
âI do give myself to you,â she whispered.
âI know.â
She leaned forward, wrapped her arms around his neck, and buried her face in the crook of his shoulder. He hugged her back, warm water cascading over them both. Her shadows flickered along the tiles, curling close.
They stood like that until the steam began to cool, until the moment had stretched long and full and whole.
Then Rexar reached out with one hand and turned off the water.
âBed?â he murmured.
âMmh. Blankets. Cuddles. Praise.â
âAll of it.â
He lifted her againâthis time wrapped in a thick towelâand carried her back through the dimly bedroom. The scent was almost gone now. Their bodies had been purified, the shadows receding, the ritual closed.
He laid her gently on the bed and crawled in beside her, tugging the covers up around them both.
âComfy?â
âLike a queen.â
He tucked her in tighter, curling himself around her back. âMy queen.â
She sighed, boneless.
âRex?â
âYeah?â
âThank you. For the mess. And the bath. And⊠everything.â
He pressed a kiss behind her ear. âAlways.â
The End âš
Hot âN Heavy
Written & illustrated by allergeez âš
Summary: When Rexar is summoned away to attend his family's grisly Culling ritual, Kriia finds herself home aloneâand rapidly succumbing to a brutal cold. Fevered, sniffling, and miserable, she settles into her usual stubborn solitude, but itâs not long before her discomfort draws the attention of her ever-attentive (and unfortunately very into it) boyfriend.
Rexar, already on edge from the family soul-feeding ceremony, video-calls her just to check inâonly to find himself instantly unraveling at the sight and sound of her sick misery. His sneeze kink flares hard as Kriia, sharp as ever even while congested, picks up on the effect sheâs having and decides to lean in. What begins as a concerned check-in turns into a slow-burn tease session, with Kriia escalating her sickly behaviorâsneezing openly into the camera, whining about her symptoms, rubbing her twitchy nose with pitiful flairâall while playing up the helpless brat persona that drives Rexar to the brink.
Despite being trapped in a ceremonial chamber of fire and blood, Rexar sneaks away into the tunnels beneath the estate to handle himself while still on call. Their video exchange becomes a tangled knot of fevered kink, emotional connection, and mutual obsession as Kriia fully takes control from the safety of her bed. She leaves Rexar completely wreckedâflushed, blissed-out, and absolutely in love.
The story ends on a soft, intimate note. Kriia falls asleep mid-call, curled up in her shadow-wrapped blankets, while Rexar watches from the other endâtorn between the fire-soaked legacy heâs trying to survive and the feverish little chaos goddess who owns him completely. Even apart, they are inextricably tethered. NSFW 8.3K words
Kriia sniffled thickly and sank deeper into the oversized nest of blankets cocooning the living room couch. The shifting shadows curled lazily around her, slow and syrupy, echoing her own sluggish energy. One of them slithered up to adjust the heating pad at her lower back, and she let it, grumbling half-heartedly as she clutched a mug of hot tea to her chest like a lifeline.
âYâknow,â she muttered hoarsely, âif I die while youâre gone, I hope you feel so guilty about it.â
Across the room, Rexar Fang stood in front of the enormous fireplace, attempting to zip up his battered duffel bag. It was bursting with ceremonial garb, silver knives, and a poorly concealed bundle of cannabis that he was smuggling to one of his less stuck-up cousins.
He looked over at her with that crooked, boyish smile that always managed to piss her off and soothe her at the same time. His crimson bangs fell into his face, smoke curling gently from his nostrils like he was exhaling stress and affection all at once.
âYouâre not gonna die, babydoll,â he said, voice warm with amusement and laced with barely restrained concern. âYouâve had a cold before. Youâve had the plague before. You kicked its ass in like, three days.â
She narrowed her bleary purple eyes at him. âI was younger. More powerful. Less congested.â Her nose twitched. âAnd not abandoned.â
Rexar laughed, then immediately looked guilty, shouldering the duffel and stepping toward her. âItâs just one night. One dumb, murdery dinner with my dad and a hundred or so of my least favorite blood relatives. Iâll be back tomorrow before you even sneeze.â
Kriiaâs lips twitched at that. âFunny you should say that, becauseââ
She turned dramatically away from him, inhaled with a soft gasp, and stifled a rapid-fire series of sneezes into her sleeve.
âHhânxgt! Nâchh! HuhâŠnâgtx! Hânxhhâhhângkch!â
Each one was gentle, barely louder than a breath, but they clearly shredded her sinuses. She groaned as she flopped back against the pillows, voice gravel-thick and mock pitiful. âIâm dyiiing.â
Rexar groaned tooâbut for a different reason. He half-turned away from her, hiding the flicker of flames that licked the edge of his irises for a split second. She caught it anyway.
âOh no,â she rasped, her tone suddenly smug despite the congestion. âDid I trigger something, Sparky?â
He scowled over his shoulder, freckled cheeks tinged pink just above his piercings. âDonât start.â
âI didnât do anything.â She curled her legs beneath her and sniffled, rubbing her nose on the inside of her sleeve with an exaggerated whine. âIâm just a poor, helpless shadow elf with a sensitive little nose and a boyfriend whoâs about to leave me for his soul-sucking murder cult.â
Rexar dropped the bag with a groan. âGods, you can be such a brat when youâre sick.â
She looked up at him from her nest, suddenly sincere beneath all the teasing. âBut I really donât feel good.â
That cracked something in him.
He crossed the space in three strides, falling to his knees at her side. The smoke thickened for a moment as he reached out to cradle her flushed cheek in his fireproof palm. The temperature of his hand was scorching, but it felt good against her feverish skin. She leaned into the touch instinctively.
âI know,â he murmured, brushing his thumb just under her eye. âYou look like hell.â
âThanks,â she whispered.
âI mean it in the most tragically hot way possible.â
She smiled faintly, and then sniffled again. He reached for the tissue box and offered it wordlessly, but she waved him off and curled her fingers into his hoodie instead.
âCanât you skip it? Just once?â she asked, quiet now, voice small in a way she rarely let anyone hear.
He closed his eyes, pressing his forehead to hers. The heat of his breath washed over her face in steady puffs of smoky warmth. âIf I skip another Culling, theyâll think Iâve gone rogue. You know what happens then.â
âThey throw a dramatic council meeting in an underground wine cellar and gossip about you in Latin for six hours?â
He chuckled, but didnât deny it.
âTomorrow,â he promised, brushing her crimson hair from her damp forehead. âIâll come back early. Iâll bring you that spiced honey you like and the purple cough syrup you pretend not to love.â
She scoffed. âIt tastes like grape soap and shame.â
âExactly your flavor profile.â
She elbowed him weakly and winced. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, then another to the bridge of her nose. She melted, nose twitching at the proximity of the smoke curling from his nostrils. She didnât sneezeâbut he definitely wanted her to.
âText me when you get there,â she murmured, tugging on the drawstring of his hoodie with fever-heavy fingers. âAnd when you sneak off to smoke. And when you get bored and want me to distract you.â
âIâll call,â he promised, hand lingering in her hair like he didnât want to let go.
âYou better. Or Iâll send you a sneeze video every hour until you die of frustration.â
He groaned low in his throat, fire flickering behind his pupils. âYouâre evil.â
âI know.â
With great reluctance, he pulled away, lifting his bag again. She watched him walk to the front door, every inch of his tall frame bristling with affection and restraint. Just before stepping out into the cold, mist-choked air, he turned back, eyes gleaming red-gold in the dim light.
âI love you, babygirl.â
She blinked blearily at him and whispered, âI love you too. Go do your weird soul ritual and eat or whatever.â
And just like that, he was gone.
The door shut, shadows slid up to lock it behind him, and Kriia flopped backward into her cocoon with a frustrated huff.
She was miserable. And congested. And maybeâjust maybeâa little excited to see what would happen when he finally
The silence that followed Rexarâs departure settled over the estate like a thick, damp blanket. It wasn't the peaceful kindâmore like the suffocating quiet you get before a storm, heavy and full of things left unsaid. Kriia sniffled pathetically into her hoodie sleeve, then groaned and tossed the empty tea mug onto the coffee table where it clinked loudly against three others. She had no idea when sheâd finished it. Time felt syrupy and disjointed, her fever fogging the space between moments.
The living room had dimmed without her askingâshadows drawing in tighter like sympathetic pets. A few of them pulsed sluggishly near the windows, absorbing the overcast grey light bleeding in through the frost-laced glass. Normally, they were sharp and reactive, moving in tandem with her breath or her moods. Now they just hovered thereâlethargic, dull, sick like their mistress.
âGreat,â she rasped, voice shredded by congestion. âEven my powers caught the damn plague.â
She reached for the game controller on the ottoman, wincing when her bangs brushed her oversensitive nose. It twitched immediately, sparking a sudden, flaring tickle that bloomed behind her sinuses like someone had dusted the inside of her skull with pepper and regret.
âUghhâŠh-hhhuhhâŠâ
The build-up hit her out of nowhereâvocal, sharp, and unpredictable. She wrinkled her nose against it, breath fluttering with frustration.
âHhhiihâNGkt! Nnâchh! Hihhh⊠Hhângxshhh! HuhhhâŠkânGXT!â
Each stifle was tighter than the last, barely muffled against her palm before the next snuck up on her. She blinked, dazed and bleary-eyed, and then groaned again, wiping at her nose with the cuff of her sleeve.
âFreakinâ ambush sneezes... I swear to godsâŠâ
The shadows rippled a little at her irritation but did nothing to help. Useless.
She tossed the blanket aside in a dramatic flourish and grabbed her headset. If she couldn't breathe and she couldnât taste anything and even her shadows had abandoned her for a nap, then she could at least shoot something in the face. Virtually.
The console booted with a cheerful chime that grated against her migraine. Kriia narrowed her eyes at the screen, gripping the controller with clammy hands. Ten minutes later, sheâd died seventeen times, most of them to absolutely stupid shitâlike walking off a cliff or trying to reload in the middle of a boss lunge.
âFuuuuuuck yoooou,â she groaned at the screen, dragging her voice like syrup. âThis game is rigged. Iâm a goddess of darkness and I just got body-slammed by a skeleton with a rake.â
She sniffled again, hard, wincing at the raw scrape of it through her throat. Her nose twitched traitorously, not done tormenting her.
âHhhuhhh⊠Hnâgktch! Tschhkt! HuhhhânkxtâHhhâtCHHkk! AhhâŠâ
She sagged forward, controller sliding to the floor. Her whole face throbbed, sinuses aching behind her eyes like someone had taken a crowbar to her skull.
âShouldâve let Rexar baby me,â she mumbled bitterly. âStupid, soft, overgrown fire prince. Wouldâve wrapped me in seven blankets and spoon-fed me soup if Iâd let him.â
The thought made her lips twitch. She could see itâRexar bustling around the kitchen shirtless, one hand holding a steaming bowl, the other trying not to set the dish towel on fire. Heâd kiss her nose between sneezes and wouldnât grumble when she wiped snot on his hoodie. Heâd light scented candles even though she couldnât smell anything, and hum some trap-metal melody under his breath while holding her against his furnace-hot chest.
âWouldnât have minded,â she muttered to herself. âNot this timeâŠâ
A flush burned through her cheeks, and not from the fever.
She flopped back onto the couch and stared up at the ornate ceiling, eyes tracking the familiar carvings of swirling flames and vines that lined the molding. Rexarâs family had no subtlety. Even the woodwork screamed power and legacy and death-by-fire. But theyâd made this mansion theirs. Kriia had insisted on shadow-dampening the lights, adding blackout curtains, bookshelves stuffed with worn paperbacks, her worn-down bong collection, and a fuzzy purple rug that Rexar hated but let her keep.
âBet heâs all stiff right now,â she muttered, imagining him standing shoulder-to-shoulder with his grim-faced siblings in some underground temple room, listening to hymns about fire and righteous consumption of souls. âPoor thing. Surrounded by murder nerds and horny ghosts.â
She grinned, then sniffled, then groaned.
Her stomach growled. She ignored it.
The shadows pulsed sluggishly again and coiled half-heartedly toward the kitchen.
âDonât bother,â she told them. âThe stove scares me when Iâm like this. And Iâm not about to microwave that mushroom rice he made. It smells like despair.â
Instead, she reached for her phone.
Rexarâs name was pinned at the top of her messages. Their last thread was mostly memes, selfies, and a video sheâd made the last time she was sickâa dramatic montage of her sneezing into a tissue and whispering âthis is your fault, you plague-ridden bastardâ between fits.
She smirked and tapped record.
The front camera flicked on. She looked roughâhair a mess, face flushed, her facial tattoos standing out stark against her pale skin. Her voice was shot, but her smirk was devilish.
âHey, Sparky,â she whispered. âJust wanted to let you know your girl is suffering. Miserably. Sniffly. Pathetically.â
She paused, scrunching her nose theatrically as another tickle crept up. Her eyes fluttered half-shut.
âUhhhnâŠhehâŠNhhâtchkk! Hhângxchhh! âŠHuhhh'nâkSHhh!â
Each one hit sharp and quick, her breath hitching prettily between stifles. She let the last one linger, groaning softly as she wiped her nose on her sleeve again.
âHope youâre having fun with the soul buffet,â she whispered, voice cracking. âBut if you were here, I might have let you cuddle me. Mightâve even let you hold the tissue box. Too bad youâre not.â
She blew him a kiss, then hit send.
Ten seconds later, she regretted nothing and everything.
She curled up again, tissues and shadow-blankets gathered around her like the world's most dramatic fevered elf girl. Her body ached. Her nose was running again. Her powers were barely a flicker.
But deep down, in the part of her heart that she'd never admit aloudânot even to herselfâshe knew she didnât just want him there because heâd help. She wanted him there because when she was this sick and miserable and exposed, he made her feel safe.
Like she didnât have to pretend to be tough all the time.
Like maybe, just maybe, being vulnerable wasn't such a bad thing.
Another sneeze snuck up on her while she was thinking too hard about that.
âHuhhh⊠HnngCHhh!ângâtchh! Huhh⊠kTChhh!â
She sighed, face buried in the curve of her elbow.
âMiss you, you big smoky idiot.â
The shadows tightened gently around her, cocooning her like arms she could almost pretend were his.
Kriiaâs phone buzzed beside her on the nightstand, cutting through the haze of fever and television static. She blinked blearily at the screen. Incoming call: Rexar đ„đ€. The profile photoâa ridiculous close-up of his faceâmade her snort, which turned immediately into a congested groan.
Still, her fingers reached for it.
The screen shifted, brightening to reveal Rexarâs face, framed by the dim, red-hued glow of one of his familyâs ceremonial rooms. The camera angle was slightly tiltedâhe mustâve propped it on a table or altarâand his familiar mop of curly white-and-crimson hair was tousled and slightly damp. He had that look in his eyes, the soft haze of fatigue layered under a stubborn grin.
âWell, well, if it isnât my favorite little plague rat,â he drawled, voice already thick with restrained amusement.
Kriia didnât even try to look good. Wrapped in a tangle of blankets with her nose twitching under the haze of her fever, she lifted one hand lazily in greeting. âI hate everything,â she croaked.
Rexar chuckled, adjusting his position. âYou look like you hate everything. Damn, babygirl. That cold is kicking your ass.â
âYou should see what I did to the Kleenex box,â she mumbled, voice ragged and nasal. âItâs in mourning.â
Rexarâs lips curled into a grin that was too fond. In the background, flickering candles and smoky incense glowed on stone pedestals. Occasionally, a voice chanted something indistinctâceremonial, formal, faintly ominous.
âYouâre literally surrounded by murder priests,â she muttered. âAnd Iâm the pathetic one.â
âYouâre hot when youâre pathetic,â he said immediately. Then paused. âOkay wait, that came out wrong.â
She sniffled and coughed a laugh into her sleeve. âIâll allow it.â
He leaned in closer to the screen, and she saw it: the shift in his expression. The subtle flicker in his red-grey eyes as he watched her rub at her nose, the tiny dip in his voice as he asked, âHow bad is it?â
Kriiaâs hand stalled just under her nose. Her breath caught.
That look.
That look.
Rexar, trying to play casual, forced his attention elsewhereâadjusting the scarf on his neck, pretending to fiddle with something just off-cameraâbut sheâd seen it. The flicker of fascination. The simmering beneath the concern. And suddenly, Kriia remembered everything.
That first day they moved in. The endless barrage of âso cute,â the nose kisses, the tip-off confession that still made her stomach flip whenever she thought about it.
She narrowed her eyes at the screen.
âYou alright, flameboy?â she asked, pushing her sleeve to her face, deliberately slow. Her voice dropped, teasing. âYouâre staring.â
âI always stare at you,â he muttered, distracted.
âMmhm.â She rubbed under her nose again, slower this time, just to see if heâd flinch.
He did.
Only slightlyâbut enough. His fingers twitched in his lap. His eyes darted, once, to the corner of the screen where her hand disappeared under the blanket.
Kriia grinned. Then, without warningâ
âHhâNgXt! Hhâgsch! kâgnsh! Ngtâchh!â
She stifled the fit rapid-fire into the collar of his hoodie she was wearing. When she looked up again, Rexar had visibly swallowed. The hand that was resting on his thigh curled slightly, as if to resist the urge to reach through the screen.
âGods,â he rasped, voice dropping. âBless you, babydoll.â
âThanks,â she sniffled, eyes narrowing wickedly. âBut you donât have to say it every time, yâknow.â
âYes, I do,â he said too quickly.
In the background, a voice called something like âEt parae, in tenebris vitae.â
Rexar glanced over his shoulder with a sheepish grin. âWeâre invoking the judgment clause or whatever. Donât worry, no oneâs being disemboweled yet.â
âTragic,â Kriia muttered, flopping sideways on the couch. âYou look like youâre dying to be somewhere else.â
âI am,â he said immediately. âLike, with you. Under all those blankets. Probably being strangled by your nose.â
Kriia choked on a laugh. âYou are so disgusting.â
âYou say that,â he said, dragging a hand over his face, âbut every time you do that little sneeze-soundâitâs like, I don't know, the gods are punishing me and rewarding me at once.â
Kriia blinked, caught between embarrassment and delight.
âAre you seriously flirting with me while your whole family is soul-feeding in the next room?â
He whispered back, âTheyâre soul-feeding quietly.â
Kriia grinned, sniffled againâloudly this timeâand caught his expression just as he bit the inside of his cheek. His eyes fluttered half-shut for a second. His breath came a little shallower.
âOhhh,â she breathed. âThere it is.â
Rexarâs smile was lopsided now. âNo clue what you mean, princess.â
âI sneeze one more time and you're gonna have to excuse yourself, arenât you?â
He groaned low. âDonât tempt me. This robe isnât flameproof.â
âAnd whose fault is that?â
They stared at each other.
The room on his side seemed darker nowâmore intimate, the flickering shadows giving the illusion of privacy. In the distance, the low chanting continued, but Rexar didnât look away. Not once. His attention was pinned to her.
To her flushed face. Her twitchy nose. Her messiness.
âYou remember when you first told me?â she asked quietly. âAbout this?â
His breath caught.
âGods, yeah. You were moving boxes, covered in dust, half-sneezing yourself into the floor.â
âAnd you justâsaid it.â
ââI have a sneeze kink, babygirl,ââ he quoted back with zero shame.
She rolled her eyes. âMost people would, like, ease into it.â
âI tried,â he said, grinning again. âI complimented your sneezes like ten times before that.â
âAnd I thought you were just into being a menace.â
âI am that too.â
Kriia laughed, then coughed, then rubbed her nose again with a tired sigh. âI donât even have the energy to keep teasing you properly.â
âThatâs okay,â Rexar murmured, voice dropping again. âYouâre killing me anyway.â
Kriiaâs gaze flicked toward the camera, slowly. Her breath hitched.
âI feel one coming,â she whispered.
Rexar visibly inhaled. âFuck.â
Kriia let the build-up take its timeâlet it drag through her expression, her eyes fluttering, nose scrunching, hands slow to react as she waited just long enough to let him react.
Thenâ
âHuhhh⊠hânâgtx! Hhâgsch! hpttâCH!ânâgtx!â
She sniffled, voice hoarse: âYou still with me, flameboy?â
But the screen had shifted.
Rexar had movedâcamera tilted down now, showing the vague impression of a stone hallway. Somewhere private.
She heard him murmur, âOne second,â followed by the sound of a door closing. Then nothing but the glow of low torchlight and the sound of him breathingâ
Heavy.
Low.
Shaky.
Thenâ
âOhhh, babygirlâŠâ
Kriiaâs grin widened as she curled deeper into her blankets.
She hadnât even started yet.
The camera flickered as Rexar settled somewhere newâsomewhere quiet, dim, clearly carved into the stone heart of the Fang estate. The sharp gothic edges of the ceremonial chamber had given way to dark brick and a low-hung torch glowing faintly behind him. His face filled the screen now, flushed and taut with restraint.
âOkay,â he muttered, running a hand through his hair, âIâve got like five minutes before they send a blood-soaked cousin to drag me back. Use it wisely.â
Kriiaâs voice came through soft, hoarse, and syrupy with congestion. âYou mean abuse it wisely.â
Rexar blinked, breath catching faintly. âKriiiâŠâ
She sniffled, delicately. The camera on her end tilted as she adjusted, blankets rustling. Her nose twitched as she rubbed a finger under it, voice dropping just enough to make his pupils visibly dilate.
âI still feel awful,â she murmured, eyes wide with mock innocence. âMy nose wonât stop ticklingâŠâ
Rexarâs jaw flexed.
She sniffled again, breath flutteringâjust slightly exaggerated, just long enough to tease.
âI think Iâm gonnaâhhihh⊠Hhh-nâktchhh! Hhâgschhh!ânânxtch!â
Each stifle was light, high-pitched, barely muffled by her wrist as her body shuddered with the gentle, rapid fire rhythm. She lifted her gaze slowly, finding the lens again with glassy purple eyes.
âUghhh,â she breathed, congested and miserable-sounding. âTheyâre getting so bad.â
Rexarâs throat worked visibly. âYouâre gonna kill me.â
âIâm not doing anything.â Her voice went up in an exaggerated whimper. âIâm sick, remember?â
âYouâre evil,â he corrected.
Her lips twitched as she brought her hand back up and gave her nose another slow, deliberate rub. âYou think Iâm faking it?â
âNo,â he muttered, leaning forward, eyes hungry and half-lidded. âThatâs the problem.â
Kriia giggledâthen coughed, sniffling thickly. âMy throat hurtsâŠâ
âOhhh fuck me,â Rexar rasped, shifting in his seat. The camera wobbled slightly. His hand disappeared from frame, likely bracing on his thigh. Or lower.
âCanât breathe through my nose,â she added pitifully. âAnd Iâm all warm and achey andâhhihh⊠hehhâŠânnâktschh! kâchh! Nxt!â
Rexarâs breath hitched, and this time she heard the faintest rumbleâa stifled groan that leaked from the back of his throat.
âBabygirl,â he breathed. âIâm gonna spontaneously combust.â
âDonât do that,â she teased. âNot until Iâm better. You still owe me soup.â
Rexarâs laugh was breathless. âKriia, I swear to godsââ
âI wish you were here,â she whispered, letting the moment drop into something just a little softer. âMy whole bodyâs so sensitiveâŠâ
She let that hang.
Watched it land.
Rexar swallowed again. The hand reappeared briefly in the frame, dragging across his mouth before vanishing again. When he next spoke, his voice had dropped nearly an octave.
âSay that again.â
She tilted her head. âWhat, that I wish you were here?â
âNo,â he said immediately. âThe other part.â
Kriia gave him a look. âYou want me to say my bodyâs sensitive?â
The way he exhaledâshaky, low, through his noseâset her stomach fluttering.
So she said it again. Slower.
âMy bodyâs⊠really sensitive.â
Rexar closed his eyes, tipped his head back against the wall, and let out a slow, unsteady breath that came dangerously close to a whine.
âYouâd be touching me so much,â she added, voice rough from the cold but soft with intention. âYouâd be trying to help. And Iâd be all sneezy and needy and whinyâŠâ
Rexarâs fists clenched.
âIâd be curled in your lap,â she continued, letting herself imagine it aloud. âAnd youâd keep petting my hair and kissing my foreheadâand every time I sneeze, youâd just melt.â
âI am melting,â he rasped, cracking an eye open. âKrii, IâmâIâm gonna have toâfuck.â
She didnât let up. Her hand fluttered to her face again, pressing lightly against her twitching nostrils as her eyes fluttered shut.
âHhhihhh⊠snfâNâgtxchhh! hhâptTshh! Hehh⊠hihhâhuhhhânkkT!â
The fit was longer, wetter, her breath fluttering between each stifle as she shifted under the blankets, clearly breathless by the end.
Rexar looked wrecked.
Face flushed.
Smoke leaking from his nose in thicker, steadier curls.
He stifled a noise into his fist that mightâve been a gasp. Or a groan. Or both.
Kriia raised her brows at him, eyes glinting. âAre you okay?â
He was not.
âBabydoll,â he croaked. âIâfuckâI canâtâŠâ
âYouâre in the murder basement of your family estate, calling your sick girlfriend while youâre supposed to be eating souls,â she said sweetly. âYouâre doing this to yourself.â
âI had to call you,â he argued, breathless. âYou looked so fucking sniffly and adorableâI couldnât not.â
âMmhm,â she hummed. âAnd now Iâm making your life difficult.â
He pressed the heel of his palm into his thigh. His voice was tight, bordering on wrecked. âYouâre making it impossible.â
âYou poor thing,â she crooned, voice full of syrupy mock-sympathy. âYouâre all flustered and helpless and alone in some dark hallway, and Iâm here sniffling and whining andâhuhhâŠ!â
Her eyes fluttered shut again.
âHhhihhhâhh'n'gtx! Hhâgchh! kâtchh! hâpttshh! Nnxtch!â
Rexar cursed softly under his breath, fingers tightening visibly as he shifted out of frame.
She could hear the rustle of fabric. Could feel the tension vibrating through the screen.
âDo you need a break, Sparky?â she whispered.
He exhaled shakily, clearly struggling to focus. âWhat I need is a stronger soul and a cold shower.â
âYouâll get neither,â she said, relishing the way his face twisted with tortured delight. âSo youâll just have to sit there and listen.â
He let out the most broken little laugh. âGods, I love you.â
âYeah,â she said, sniffling again. âI know.â
She shifted on camera, blankets slipping to reveal her shoulderâred X tattoos vivid against pale skin, flushed cheeks, and the hoodie still hanging loose from her frame. Her nose twitched again.
âThink Iâm gonna sneeze again,â she whispered.
Rexar let out a small, strangled sound.
Kriia gave him the slowest, most delicious pre-sneeze buildup imaginable. Her breath hitched. Her brows drew together. Her lashes fluttered.
âHuhhh⊠hehh⊠hiihh⊠Hhân'ghkkT! hhâtchhh! hihhhâŠNnngCHh!âuhhhâŠâ
She sagged back against the pillows, flushed and sniffling.
âOhhhhhh gods,â Rexar whispered, his voice so hoarse she barely recognized it.
His camera shifted againâblurring out briefly as he angled it just off his lap. One of his hands was still visible at the edge of the frame, curled tightly, knuckles white.
âI should hang up,â he said, but it didnât sound like a threat. It sounded like begging.
Kriia smiled.
Then fake-whined, soft and desperate: âBaaabe, I feel so yuckyâŠâ
That broke him.
She watched it happenâhis eyes fluttering shut, breath catching, nostrils flaring slightly as he let out a barely contained groan.
âI want to hold you so bad,â he whispered. âYouâd be such a mess in my arms.â
She sniffled, then murmured, âIâm already a mess.â
He whimpered.
And for a second, Kriia forgot the ache in her body, the fever, the rasp in her throat. Because right now, she was winning.
Rexar Fang, descendant of murder-pyromancers, beloved soul of the underground music scene, six-foot-four menace of chaos and fireâ
âwas a stammering, undone wreck for her sneezes.
And she wasnât about to let him forget it.
The sound of stone beneath Rexarâs boots echoed low and quiet, muffled by the thickness of air that hadnât been touched by light in decades. The tunnel heâd ducked into stretched deep beneath the Fang estateâan ancient hall of carved obsidian, once used for rituals long since banned by the High Circle. It was colder down here, the walls damp with condensation, lit only by faintly pulsing glyphs scrawled across the stone.
He kept one hand on the wall, guiding himself deeper into privacy, the other holding his phone tight in his grip like a lifeline.
âI can still hear you breathing, yâknow,â Kriia said on the other end, her voice like honey-dripped static through congestion. âEven when you run off like a scared little schoolboy.â
âIâm notââ Rexar broke off, dragging a hand over his flushed face. âIâm not scared. Iâm trying not to catch fire in the middle of a death chamber, thanks.â
A breathy laugh filtered through the speaker. It was wet. Hoarse. Wicked. âMmm. So dramaticâŠâ
Rexar didnât answer. He couldnât. He could barely think.
His body achedânot just with heat and the rising storm of tension clawing its way through his gutâbut with guilt, too. Somewhere two floors up, his brothers and cousins were performing a ritual centuries old. Flames. Incantations. The devouring of damned souls. A necessary evil in the world the Fang family had built and one Rexar hated with every bone in his body.
He was supposed to be participating. Shouldâve been cleansing the next sacrificial vessel. But instead, he was in a tunnelâpalms shaking, breath catching, painfully hard in ceremonial robes that still smelled like ash and incenseâbecause his sick, sniffly girlfriend couldnât stop teasing him.
âYou sound a little out of breath,â Kriia murmured. âEverything okay down there?â
Her image was still framed perfectly on his screen: blankets around her like a plush throne, hoodie collar rumpled around her collarbone, hair tousled from fever-sleep. Her nose twitched subtly as she sniffled, lips parted around shallow, tickly breaths.
âKrii, pleaseâŠâ he whispered, voice raw.
âPlease what?â she asked, all wide eyes and mock innocence. âPlease stop describing how I feel like my entire bodyâs melting from the inside out? Or should I keep talking about how raw my throat feels? Or how Iâm so dizzy and achey I canât even sit up straight withoutâhhihhâŠâhehhh⊠hâNxgtchhh!â
She collapsed forward with a breathy stifle that hit all at onceâperfectly timed, utterly devastating, her breasts bouncing slightly with the force of it.
Rexar let out a sound that could only be described as a strangled whimper.
Kriia straightened slowly, blinking at him with glassy eyes. âStill with me?â
He stumbled, catching himself on the wall.
âRexar,â she said, softer now, teasing giving way to curiosity. âAre you actually okay?â
âNo,â he whispered. âNot even a little.â
âThen why are you still holding back?â
His throat moved as he swallowed.
âBecause this is wrong,â he said, breathless. âIâm literally underground while my familyâs performing a soul ritual and youâreâyouâre making meâŠâ
âMaking you what?â she asked.
Rexar groaned. His hand disappeared from frame again, this time bracing against his thigh, chest rising and falling in heavy, uneven breaths.
âSay it,â she whispered.
His nostrils flared. His smoke was thick now, curling up the camera lens. âYou know what.â
âYou like this,â she purred, voice hoarse but filled with smug glee. âYou love this. Sitting in some haunted hallway, body burning, while your poor, congested girlfriend makes those little sick noises you lose your mind overâŠâ
She sniffled againâloud, wet, intentionally exaggerated.
Kriia adjusted her position on the bed, shadows shifting around her like velvet tentacles responding to her mood. She looked into the camera with glassy, half-lidded eyes and a flushed nose twitching gently, deliberately exaggerating every motion as she reached up and rubbed her palm in slow circles beneath her nostrils.
âYou still watching me?â she asked, voice like cracked honey.
Rexar, sitting hunched in the tunnel, nodded silently.
âRemember what you said that first night?â she crooned. âHow you wanted to tie me up in a blanket cocoon, lay me in your lap, and keep tissues tucked into your waistband so you could wipe my nose for me every time I sneezed?â
âIâfuckâI didnât mean it likeââ
âYes, you did,â she said with a sly smile. âYou do want that. You want me feverish and soft and needy. You want me to look up at you with teary eyes and beg you to make the tickle go away.â
Rexarâs camera tilted slightly as he shifted, trying to hide the way his hips bucked forward. His breathing had fully changedâshorter, sharper, his voice caught somewhere in his throat.
âSay it,â Kriia whispered. âSay what you want.â
âI want you,â he finally gasped. âSick and squirmy and fucking helpless. I want to take care of you until I canât stand it anymore.â
Kriia grinned, slow and dangerous. âAnd then what?â
His next breath was guttural. âThen I want to ruin you.â
She gave a soft moanâhalf a congested groan, half breathy giggleâand tilted her head, pretending to sniffle innocently. Her fingers crept up to press beneath her nose again.
âOhhh, Rexar⊠I feel another one coming⊠what if I canât hold it back this time?â
âDonât,â he begged. âLet it happenâpleaseââ
She fluttered her lashes, breathing building in theatrical little hitches.
âHhhuhhh⊠hhhHâNGSHhh! hâtchhh!âhuhâKtchhh! AhhhâŠâ
She didnât cover it. Let the mist glint in the screen light again. And when she recovered, panting lightly, her voice went syrupy again.
âBet you wish you were here to clean that up.â
Rexar groaned so deeply it echoed.
âGods,â she whispered. âYou get like this every time, donât you? The second I sound a little stuffy, you forget all about fire rituals and soul feasting. All you want to do isâwhat? Babysit me? Pin me down and pet me until I sneeze all over you?â
âK-Krii,â he stammered, voice low, breath shallow.
âYouâre so easy,â she purred. She leaned in toward the screen, just enough for her camo bra to peek out again as she pulled her hoodie collar down slowly. âEvery little sniffle I make, you get hotter. Your fingers start twitching. You forget how to speak.â
He swallowed audibly.
âYou want to help me, donât you?â she asked sweetly. âTuck me under the blankets, rub my back, kiss my forehead while Iâhhuhhh⊠hhânkkTCH!âhuhâNxtchhh!âhiihh... hhhâtchhh!â
She collapsed forward again, breath catching so prettily between sneezes she sounded winded by the end of it.
Rexar was on the edge. His breathing had gone shallow, one hand now flat on the floor beside him for support as he practically trembled with restraint.
âPrincessâŠâ
âIâd be whining for you,â she continued softly. âNuzzling against your chest, rubbing my little stuffy nose into your shirtâŠâ
âBabygirl,â he begged.
âAnd youâd love it,â she whispered. âYouâd tell me how cute I sound. How helpless. How bad you want toââ
âDonât,â he snappedâbut the way he said it wasnât angry. It was desperate. Like he needed her to stop just as much as he didnât.
She tilted her head at the screen. âYouâre making that face again.â
âWhat face.â
âThat starving face.â
âIâm notââ
âYour eyes get all shiny,â she murmured, licking her lips. âAnd your nose twitches. And you get this little tremble in your voice, like youâre fighting every urge in your body not to lose it.â
He said nothing. He couldnât.
So she delivered the killing blow.
âYouâre so good at pretending to be composed when youâre turned on,â she whispered. âItâs adorable.â
Rexar snapped.
He dropped the phone briefly as he leaned his head back against the wall and groanedâloud. The screen went black for a second, muffled by fabric, before tilting sideways to capture only the edge of his jaw and the heavy fall of his red-tinted bangs.
His voice came through ragged. âIâm not gonna make it back to the ritual.â
âDonât,â Kriia whispered. âStay with me.â
âI shouldnât.â
âBut you will.â
He didnât argue. Couldnât.
He stayed there, slouched on the cold stone floor, ceremonial sash twisted around his waist, breath shaking, hips subtly shifting as he tried to ground himself. His smoke curled higher, denser, glowing with embers that shimmered with every ragged exhale.
âYouâre wrecked,â Kriia cooed. âAll because Iâve got a head cold.â
âNot just that,â he breathed. âBecause itâs you.â
Kriia smiledâsoft and real this time. âIâd kiss you if you were here.â
âEven if I was sweating through my clothes and leaking smoke?â
âEspecially then.â
He laughedâa rough, low sound. Then: âYou are evil.â
âI just know what you like.â
âYouâre what I like.â
Silence stretched between them.
Thenâquietly, almost sheepishlyâRexar said, âIf you donât stop, Iâm gonnaââ
âThen donât stop,â she interrupted, voice raspy with congestion and control. âDonât stop anything.â
He exhaled so hard it sounded like his whole chest was collapsing.
âI canât even touch you,â he rasped, one hand dragging across his jaw. âAnd Iâm still closer than Iâve ever been.â
Rexarâs grip on the phone was white-knuckled, jaw clenched so tightly his temple ached. The flames of his familyâs ritual still danced somewhere above, but down in this carved-out sanctum of obsidian tunnels, all he could seeâall he could feelâwas her.
Kriia.
A flushed, sniffling, sick mess on the screen. And she was glowing.
Not literally. Not like him. But in the dim lamplight of their shared bedroom, she looked lit from withinâcheeks ruddy, nose pink and twitching, lips parted with every ticklish breath. She had that dazed look she wore when fevered, half-feral and fully dangerous.
She gave a hoarse little giggle, rubbing under her nose with a knuckle. âStill watching me fall apart, flameboy?â
âI canât not,â Rexar groaned, barely keeping the tremor from his voice.
âGood.â
Thenâslowly, theatricallyâshe lifted her shirt just enough to show off the curve of her camo bra. The motion sent her hair spilling messily over one shoulder, her breath visibly hitching.
âI think I feel another sneeze comingâŠâ
Rexar couldnât move. Could barely breathe.
Kriiaâs build-up was torturously slow. She let her breath flutter in ragged, uneven wavesâhead tilting, nostrils flaring delicately, lashes fluttering. âHhhihhh⊠hiihhh⊠hhHâNGâtchh! Kâtchh! HângCHhh! Huhhh⊠nnâKXshhh!â
She sneezed openly at the cameraâwet, head-snapping fits that misted faintly in the dim light.
Rexar whimpered offscreen.
Kriia sniffled and tilted her head at him. âYou still breathing?â
âBarely,â he rasped.
âGods, youâre so easy,â she whispered, voice thick with amusementâand congestion. âYou get hard so fast. Bet youâre already stroking yourself under those robes, arenât you?â
Rexarâs head hit the wall behind him with a quiet thunk. âDonât. Start.â
Kriia smiledâlanguid, sly, eyes half-lidded. âYou want me to stop?â
He didnât answer.
So she leaned in closer, let the camera catch every detail of her flushed, glistening expression. âIâm still burning up,â she whispered. âMy skinâs so sensitive I canât even lie still. And my nose just wonât stop.â
Another sharp inhale.
She snapped forward with a wet, breathy âHhâNgxtCHhh!âuhhhâŠâ
This time she moaned a little after, drawing her sleeve slowly across her upper lip. âStill there, Sparky?â
Rexarâs voice broke: âFuck, yes.â
He shifted the camera slightly. She caught a glimpse of his handâfinally sliding beneath his robe, slow and unsteady. His face was flushed deep crimson now, lips parted, breath shallow.
âYouâre touching yourself,â she breathed.
âI had to,â he muttered, like it physically hurt to admit. âYouâyouâre too much.â
âPoor thing,â she cooed. âYouâre down in your murder basement, getting off to your girlfriendâs sneezes while the rest of your familyâs out sacrificing souls.â
âI know,â he hissed, stroking himself now in slow, shuddering movements. âItâs so fucked.â
She smirked, letting out a fake-cute little cough. âYou love it.â
âI love you,â he choked. âThatâs worse.â
She giggled again, rubbing her nose between forefinger and thumb. âWhat if I just⊠kept going?â
He twitched. Visibly.
So she pushed.
âOhhh, babe⊠I feel soooo yucky,â she mock-whined. âI need someone to take care of me. Rub my back. Hold me while Iâhhuhhh!âHuhhhânGTCHhh! kâtCHhh!â
She shuddered with the release, mouth parted, breath panting just a little harder.
The wet sound of his slicked strokes reached her through the speaker.
âOhhh my gods,â she murmured. âYouâre really doing it.â
âYouâre making me do it,â he growled.
She tilted her head. âGood.â
âTouch yourself,â he ordered.
Kriia blinked, then raised an eyebrow. âYou sure you can handle me doing that?â
âTry me.â
She didnât hesitate. One hand dipped under the blanket, just past the cameraâs frame. Her body shifted, hips rolling slowly as her fingers found heat.
Rexar moaned.
âIâm so sensitive,â she whispered. âMy skinâs all hot and I keep flinching every time I sneeze. Everything tingles. Even thisâŠâ
She stroked herself gently, breath catching.
âFucking hell,â Rexar growled, speeding up.
âIâm gonna get messy,â she moaned. âAll sticky and flushed and redâand still sneezing.â
She let out a wet sniffle, the sound obscenely timed, dragging her hand higher for one deep rub.
âSay it,â she panted. âSay what I do to you.â
âYou make me crazy,â he gasped. âYou make me fucking feral. I want to bury my face in your pussy while youâre feverish and begging.â
âMmmn,â she moaned. âYouâd hold me tight, right? While I canât stop sneezing into your chest? Your shirt soaked in it, and youâd just groan every timeââ
âHnnnghâKriia!â
She gasped too, working herself harder now under the covers, her chest rising with every fevered breath. âYouâre gonna cum, arenât you? Just from hearing me like this?â
He nodded, frantic. âSay my name.â
âRexar,â she purred.
Againâmore desperate: âSay it.â
âRexar,â she moaned. âFlameboy. S-Sparky. Iâm gonnaâhhuhhh⊠HHHâKTCHhh!âAhhh! Godsââ
She came with a gasp and a sniffle, hips bucking beneath the blanket, every part of her trembling with overstimulated sensitivity.
Rexar came seconds after, breath shattering into raw, incoherent groans. His hand kept moving for a moment as he rode it out, hips arching, until he slumped back against the wallâcompletely undone.
For several seconds, neither of them said a word.
Kriia laid there in the dark, chest rising and falling, a lazy, satisfied smirk curling across her lips.
Again, after several seconds, Rexar finally reappeared on cameraâhair mussed, jaw slack, eyes half-lidded and shining in the soft firelight of his hidden sanctuary. His skin glowed faintly red from exertion and residual magik, lips parted as if even breathing took effort now. His chest rose and fell in slow, deliberate rhythmâevery inhale still tinged with the heat of his undoing.
He looked wrecked. And wholly satisfied.
He stared at the screen, drinking her in as though the image alone could sustain him a moment longer. Kriia was still lying back in her fevered nest, her shirt back in place, hoodie slightly askew on one shoulder. Her nose was still pink, twitching faintly now and then, and she dabbed at it lazily with a tissue, face soft with post-teasing contentment.
When Rexar finally spoke, his voice came out gentle, half-broken with awe, âYou are fucking lethal.â
Kriia barely glanced up from blowing her nose, the sound wet and unbothered. She tossed the tissue aside with dramatic flair and exhaled tiredly. âStill worth it.â
They grinned at each other through the dim, wrecked glow of their devices.
âOkay,â Rexar finally muttered, âI need to go find a cold fountain. Or die.â
âDonât die,â Kriia said, burrowing into the blankets. âJust come home soon.â
âTomorrow,â he promised. âAnd youâre not moving. Iâm gonna take care of everything.â
Kriia yawned, shadows curling up around her again. âGood. Iâll be sneezy and pathetic. Just for you.â
Rexarâs grin softened into something near worshipful.
âI love you, plague rat.â
âI know,â she mumbled, eyes already closing. âI love you, hotshot.â
There was silence for a momentâthick with shared heat, sickroom intimacy, and the kind of charged calm that came only after surrender.
Then Rexar laughed, breathless, and whispered, âOnly you could get me to do these kinds of things.â
Kriiaâs lips curved. âWho else but Kriia?â
She didnât need to say anything else.
The next few minutes passed in a lull, peaceful but heavy with afterglow. Neither of them said much. Rexar rested his head against the wall, occasionally glancing down to check his camera, as if afraid she'd disappear if he blinked too long. Kriia sniffled once or twice but didnât speak. Her eyes began to flutter closed as her breathing slowed. The teasing was done, the game complete. Now she was just tired.
She shifted deeper into her blankets, hoodie tugged up to her chin, shadows gently coiling tighter around her limbs like velvet vines. Her last visible motion was a twitch of her nose and a soft sigh as she turned onto her side, the screen dimming slightly as the camera auto-adjusted to the dark.
Rexar watched it all.
The rise and fall of her chest. The way her fingers curled loosely around the edge of a tissue. The slight hitch in her breath as she sank from playful mischief into deep, medicated sleep.
He didnât say goodbye.
He didnât need to.
Instead, he let the image burn into him, let the stillness settle, and whispered so softly that it might not have even made it through the speaker:
âSleep tight, menace.â
Her shadow shifted in replyâjust the faintest rippleâand then stilled again.
It was nearly two in the morning by the time the Fang estate fell silent.
Above ground, the halls still carried the residue of the ritual: a low thrum of residual energy, the smell of scorched air and sanctified ash. The Culling was complete. The ceremonial fire had gone out. The others had retired to their chambers or slunk off into the snow-drenched hills beyond the estate to hunt or smoke or meditate, as they always did after devouring something eternal.
But Rexar stayed in the tunnel.
Slumped against the wall, robe half-undone, face still flushed, he watched his phone screen with the quiet intensity of someone who'd just survived a holy war. Not because of the Culling. Because of her.
Kriia had fallen asleep on the call.
He hadnât wanted to hang up. Couldnât bring himself to. Even now, her camera stayed open, her screen dimmed just enough to blur her features into dreamy softness.
She was curled under her mountain of blankets like a fevered empress, cheeks still ruddy, breath shallow. Her shadows coiled lazily around her shoulders and chest like a living scarf, weaving gently with each inhale, reacting even in her sleep.
Rexar watched her for several minutes, chin resting against his knee, a small crooked smile playing at the corner of his mouth. His body still tingledâwarm, drained, soul-deep content like he'd been wrung out and left glowing.
Then the screen went dark.
He blinked.
No warning. JustâCall ended.
For a second, he sat in stunned silence.
And then: buzz.
New Message from Kriia.
hey sparky,âšyouâre probs a melted pile of smoke rn but⊠just in case youâre still in one piece:âši miss you.âševen more than i wanna sneeze on you.âšmaybe. đ
A second later, another buzz. A voice memo this time.
He hesitated, then pressed play.
Her voice came through rough, raw with congestion, quiet like she didnât want to wake herself up.
âHey. Um. Sorry I ended the call. My phone tried to overheat and combust. Wonder whyâŠââšsoft congested laughâšâYouâre probably still glowing, huh? All sweaty and pretty and ruined.ââšpause, long inhaleâšâI feel gross. Still. But⊠I dunno. That was nice. You made me feel like I wasnât alone, even if I was a snot-monster in a blanket cave.ââšpause again, soft shifting of sheetsâšâSo yeah. I miss you. And I love you a lot. Come home soon. Or Iâll find a way to sneeze directly into your next family gathering.ââšsniffle, softer nowâšâ...Night, Sparky.â
Rexar bit back a groan that was half love, half ache, all need.
He opened the text reply bar and hovered for a moment before typing:
You are the most beautiful snot-monster in history.âšI am, in fact, still glowing.âšI miss you so bad itâs making me stupid.âšYou can sneeze on me tomorrow. Iâm not even kidding.
Then, almost as an afterthought, he snapped a picture with the front-facing camera.
His hair was a mess. His face flushed. Eyes still heavy-lidded, and the firelight behind him painted him in deep oranges and shadowy reds. He looked wrecked. Soft.
He captioned it: âYou did this.â
Hit send.
Then closed his eyes.
Let his head fall back against the obsidian wall. Let the chill of the tunnel wrap around him like a counterpoint to the heat still singing through his blood.
âGods,â he whispered into the dark, to no one and only her. âI miss you.â
Back in their shared wing of the estate, Kriia lay cocooned in warmth.
The shadows wrapped her like a velvet cocoon, responding to her every breath with tiny pulses of inky motion. The fire in the hearth had died to coals, and her fever had dipped just low enough to grant her lucidity without totally robbing her of the sick haze that made the world feel softer.
Her phone buzzed gently on her chest.
She cracked open one eye and peeked at the screen.
The selfie made her laugh out loudâa breathy, tired chuckle that caught in her throat. Gods, he was such a mess. And it was so obviously her fault. The thought alone made her cheeks heat.
She didnât reply.
Instead, she whispered to the shadows, too soft for words, and they respondedâcurling tighter around her like arms, warm and thick and heavy. Almost like him.
She let her eyes fall shut.
Still smiling.
Six hours later, Rexar slipped in through the back entrance of their estate, covered in snow and ash.
The room was dark.
Silent.
He peeled off his robe, hung it over the rack, and padded quietly through the hall. When he reached the bedroom, he stopped.
She was still asleep. Curled up under their blankets. Nose pink. Mouth open. One arm flopped over the pillow, the other clutching a tissue box like a stuffed animal.
She sniffled softly in her sleep.
Rexar melted on the spot.
He tiptoed closer, reached down, and brushed a lock of red hair from her cheek. Her skin was cool now, no longer burning. Her shadows flicked toward him lazily, then relaxed. Accepting. Welcoming.
âIâm here,â he whispered.
She didnât wake.
But she smiled in her sleep.
And that was enough.
The End âš
Written and illustrated by allergeez âš





