A terrible idea: Streaming Movie
So I’ve been going down a rabbit hole of bad movies and those crappy ones from the 2000s, those by Friedberg and Seltzer came to mind and it gave me an idea.
If they made something in 202X, what would be one thing they would parody? Streaming shows.
So I present an abomination of a concept combining (some) of the biggest hitters and stinkers of streaming that have run their course already.
Streaming Movie
Featuring shallow and tasteless parodies of: The Idol (main), Tiger King, All’s Fair, WandaVision, Squid Game, Fallout, Stranger Things, Velma, House of the Dragon, Chernobyl, Barbie and Oppenheimer for some reason, and more crap then we can name.
The plot follows a lawyer-pop star, a spoof of Jocelyn from the idol and Kim Karshian’s character from All’s Fair, who after a disastrous show following a nervous break down the verdict over her latest court case is taking a road trip in her pink convertible to get away from her job, which leads her to Eastview, New Jersey after getting directions from a group of white haired people with a dragon.
A perfect suburban neighborhood somehow stuck in the 1950s and in black and white built on top of a nuclear disaster zone following a power plant meltdown, a sight that is visible in the background. Weird mutant monsters roam the outskirts of town and some residents look like their faces are melting. A nuclear bomb is dropped in the distance while an Oppenheimer lookalike stands nearby for no reason, and is promptly run over when our heroine swerves to avoid a group of teenagers getting chased by a demigorgan before she crashes into the sign.
Waking up, our heroine finds herself in this suburban hellhole seemingly as the only one unaffected by the Hex placed in the town by the Scarlet Bitch as she’s still in color. Save for a random cameo from Mindy Kaling’s Velma who’s only there to say something stupid so that the audience can point and laugh to say “That show sucks” before she’s killed by a radioactive green poorly CGI’d Tiger.
Wandering the neighborhood while a laugh track plays, she eventually finds her way to a house that looks modern and meets the Tedros stand-in and their eventual “romance” (more like, he just treats her like shit and she goes with it) as he tries to pull her into his world.
It’s later revealed that the Tedros stand in is a cult leader who used to run the town as his personal zoo before the Wanda stand in showed up, mourning the Vision stand in and her crippling addiction to sitcoms. He intends to take back the town with the protagonist by his side.
They recruit an army of the squid game soldiers, a mutant, the Starnger Things kids, and the Targaryens and storm the town. Chaos unfolds as the protagonist’s law firm, acting as the S.W.O.R.D stand-in, manage to break through as the whole place devolves into a mess of neon/black and white.
Just as it looks like there’s going to be a major fight, the Hex breaks as we hear a loud “Cut!”. The whole thing is revealed to be a film set that looks nothing like the Eastview backdrop as the actors stand around all confused, believing themselves to actually be their characters on the show.
Turns out the series got cancelled due to poor ratings and decreasing attention spans as the studio is shifting towards a more “valuable” market, brainrot crap for toddlers.
Somebody punches the director as a prop Skibidi Toilet falls on another actor before the credits roll, complete with a song by the fake Weeknd impersonator we see several times throughout the movie. Most of the soundtrack is also made up of shallow parodies of his songs mixed with legal jargon and 50s sounding instrumentals.
