#reputationstatiumtour

Hey! So I know oh so well how it feels to think Taylor will never ever follow me or like a post of mine or anything, but she did and I saw it at 2am a couple years ago and sobbed. I nearly have 600 followers so I know this won’t reach as many people as I’d want but please reblog and add users who deserve a Taylor follow! I’ll start with a lovely person’s account who I’ve been following for awhile.

@sweetertayfiction ❤️❤️❤️ (taylor follow this angel!!)

Keep reblogging and adding users! I’ll reblog everytime someone is added!! Go go go!! 💜

Matching taylor tops ✅

Tv turned up as loud as it goes ✅

Ready to sing every word at the top of our lungs✅

Dance moves prepared ✅

Looks like we are all set to watch our Babe perform on Radio Ones Big Weekend!!! WE ARE SO EXCITED!!!!! Time to see @taylorswift perform songs from Reputation in the U.K. For the FIRST TIMEE!!!

GIRRRLLLL YOUR GOING TO KILL IT!!!

See you In Dublin on the 15th of June in Croke park BLOCK 4 🙈🙈💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻🐍🐍🐍🎉🎉🎉

As I hope you know, my name is Kelly. I’ve been a big fan of you since 2009. That’s nearly a decade and thinking about that is absolutely INSANE. I can truthfully say that you’ve been the most consistent thing in my life. No friend or artist/musician or tv show or pet or ANYTHING has been there for me like you have. That alone is something I wish I could find a proper way to thank you for... Maybe one day.

I haven’t updated you on my life recently so I thought that might be a good idea, whether you see it or not. Let’s hope this is as therapeutic as I hope. I think I’ll talk about the more negative things first because ending on a positive note is always the best I think. Last year I reunited with a girl who I once considered my “best friend.” We were really close for a year and I joined her existing friend group. They took me in and I thought we’d all be really good friends for a long time. Sure, I had good times with this girl, but overall, the friendship drained me emotionally. She’d get mad at me for not texting back or answering FaceTime calls. She got mad and said it made her depressed when I hang out with other people. When I became much better friends (making him one of my best friends) with the boy who is now my boyfriend, she told me that she thinks how we both feel about each other isn’t real and she didn’t support it. She told me about a month ago that she can’t wait till we break up. I never really trusted her, I just forced myself to. I thought there was something wrong with me for not wanting to, let alone being able to, tell her things. The times I forced myself to tell her things, it never ended up well. She told other people about the things I told her that were supposed to stay between us. She got mad if I told other people things but not her. She would tell me things like, “I’m supposed to be the first and only person you tell things like this to!” She would put me down for ANYTHING and get away with it by saying it was a joke and that she actually loves me. I immediately felt worse about myself and my dreams and life and EVERYTHING when I talked to her, even something as stupid as what I wanted to wear. Being friends with her made me more insecure than I’d care to admit. She told people things about me that I explicitly said to not talk to/mention to anyone, and when she did those things would make them more gossip-y and worse sounding than they are and would lie to me and victimize herself if I found out. I think you get the point that she was a shit friend. So, a little over a week ago I was on the phone with my boyfriend ranting about how awful this friendship made me feel. I told him that I wanted to tell her I need space and he supported me fully. He’s been nothing but loving and supportive and respectful to me about this situation (and everything really). There’s a reason I trust and love that boy more than most people. Anyway, I texted her that I need space and she got mad at me about it. She told me things that were scary so I screenshotted them and sent them to her mom (things that I couldn’t help and I thought someone who could should know about). She kept saying manipulative things to me and victimized herself (which is something I now realize she did the entirety of our rekindled friendship). She texted my boyfriend asking him to text her immediately when he saw her texts and told others about what I said (while making me seem like the bad guy I bet). The last thing she said to me was over text and basically saying I love you and goodbye, “Not forever.” That friendship was so emotionally damaging to me and I’m still exhausted from it that I wholeheartedly believe we are never ever going to be friends again. The sad thing about that short story is that it really is, the shorter version of the story. There are SO many more contributing things to me becoming fed up completely, but that would be a whole book and I don’t want to think about all of it right now.

Another bad thing is mental illness. That has actually been improving since I ended the friendship with that toxic friend. My skin has seriously gotten clearer because of the stress relieved from being done with that friendship. That moves me into a more positive topic... Which also turns out to be my mental health ironically. With the end of the friendship with that girl, I’ve noticed myself feel a lot better about myself. It opened up my eyes a lot to what I’ve hidden from myself and other in fear of judgement and her disapproval. I’ve smiled more and have become more of my old self, in the way that I don’t have such a hard time talking to people and having fun. My boyfriend has even said that I’ve seemed SO MUCH MORE happy without her in my life. Without her and that group and all the friends who said they wouldn’t pick sides, but obviously picked her “side”, I’ve learned that all I need are less friends who care about me truly, rather than a bunch of people who don’t actually care about me and my happiness. I’ve been left with my best friend (boyfriend), my other best friend who I met in 6th grade, a good friend I met last year who I fell off with for awhile but him and I are on really good terms again because he could acknowledge the shit he’s done and made an effort to change it and honestly has, a girl who I’m not THAT close with but is my boyfriend’s other best friend and who is the definition of an angel, my boyfriend’s sister (who is four years younger but I love her like a sister)... So many wonderful people. Quality over quantity is something I value a lot. I’ve also been improving in school. I’ve started gaining more confidence in my body and in my face and hair without makeup/styles. I’m still working on my music and art and writing and learning that those don’t determine my worth and if they’re not great, it doesn’t mean that I’m not great. I’ve started working on bettering myself and it’s helped me become more empowered and confident. 

I love you. Without your music and constant inspiration and the feeling that I have you to lean on I don’t think I’d be so positive after never ending depression and bumps in the road I’ve experienced for the past 3-4 years. You’ve always been a constant source of light in my life but since reputation came out, I’ve noticed that a lot more... Thank you.

I hope you’re as excited for August 7th in Pittsburgh as I am!! I love you with all my heart. 

See you soon, love 💝