#renorian

ty for the ask!! from the non-wholesome romantic asks. feel free to send more in!

3. In what ways are they good and bad for each other?

answered here!

4. Is there someone else who would be a better partner for either of them?

It's entirely possible, but it feels so subjective that I really don't know how to answer this one, y'know?

So, instead of answering that question, I'll throw you a curveball: there is an alternate universe in which Renan could have wound up with one Professor Emmrich Volkarin. Better or worse? Who can say! Certainly different, though.

14. What's an opinion they'll never agree on? How do they deal with that?

ty for the ask!! from the non-wholesome romantic asks. feel free to send more in!

2. Is their relationship toxic or unhealthy in any way?

It's at least a little codependent. Renan has to give up a lot to become serious with Dorian, and when he loses the one thing he previously devoted his life to, he's quick to fill that sudden void with Dorian. There's also the issue where Dorian tends to make decisions that impact them both without consulting or even warning Renan (such as leaving for Tevinter), and Renan sees the best way to get around Dorian's indecisiveness as just going over his head to handle problems for him (such as getting the Pavus amulet). This makes them both question how much the other trusts them, and neither of them really have the emotional intelligence to properly describe this to the other without it turning into an argument.

3. In what ways are they good and bad for each other?

Good: Dorian shows Renan that he can be up-front and honest with people, that intimacy is not a weakness, that people will love him for who and what he is — even the grizzly details. Their developing relationship encourages Renan to be more genuine in all of his relationships, allowing him to become closer with other companions as well. Renan shows Dorian that there are people that will be proud to know him and hold him as he is, that he doesn't have to tone down his peacocking or sharp tongue for someone to want to show him off. He's also the first to make Dorian seriously consider settling down with someone and think about what that might look like in the life he leads. That, in and of itself, is a neutral thing, but it encourages him to feel less anxiety about long-term planning and to prioritize domestic comforts in those plans, which overall leads to him taking better care of himself. Bad: Dorian's tendency to put his foot in his mouth when upset often leads to him saying or implying things he doesn't really mean, which is hell for Renan's insecurity and paranoia. His hot-and-cold nature also leaves Renan reeling more often than not, unsure what Dorian actually wants from him, and, in short, there is a period of time in which his relationship with Dorian is responsible for at least 50% of Renan's general malaise. Renan, meanwhile, is many, many men rolled into one, and the fact that Inquisitor is among them — or, as Dorian says it once, the King of the World — is... a lot of pressure for Dorian. He's never been in a serious, committed, public relationship before, and he's trying to make it work for the very first time on what might be the most global and openly scrutinized stage possible. Dorian's always been confident in himself (or, rather, had a veneer of confidence), but there's only so much one man can take before insecurities begin to pile up. This, plus the knowledge — not the suspicion, the confirmed knowledge — that Renan is and always will be hiding things from him is incredibly stressful for Dorian, leading him to make more rash decisions and reckless pivots in his life to feel like he is still in control of at least some parts of it. There is a period of time in which his relationship with Renan causes a spike in Dorian's self-sabotaging tendencies.

The rest is under the cut for ease of scrolling ->

ty for the ask!! from the non-wholesome romantic asks. feel free to send more in! answering these out of order so I can throw one of them under a cut :)c

8. What would it take for them to break up?

Given that so much of their relationship is built upon a mutual trust that feels rare to both of them, violating that trust could easily unravel their entire relationship. Both of them are also sensitive to feeling unwanted or feeling as though their partners are ashamed of them. Anything that needles at these insecurities hard enough could spiral out of control pretty quickly.

14. What's an opinion they'll never agree on? How do they deal with that?

The best way to learn magic. Renan is a firm believer in letting children explore their magic at their own pace, providing guidance and correction only as needed or requested, and letting that natural connection between magic and body provide an intuitive basis as they grow older and more powerful. Meanwhile, Dorian is a firm believer in beginning with the basics to learn strong foundational skills, with a healthy dose of theory on the side. He was raised in a very regimented manner and found that structure helpful, seeing Renan's upbringing as risky and negligent. Meanwhile, Renan was raised to trust his gut and shape his magic to what he needed it to be, seeing Dorian's upbringing as stifling and unnatural. For a long, long time, this disagreement doesn't particularly matter; it's just something they use to jab at one another when they're teasing. However, if/when they eventually have a child, this would lead to a lot of arguments about how to raise a mage "properly", and likely a lot of messy spirals into critiquing one another's childhoods that would cut to the quick faster than either of them would like. I could see them trying to use both approaches, alternating between the two and hovering nervously while the other took the lead, trying to learn how to trust each other with just one more thing.

9. How do they feel about each other's exes and people who flirt with them? Is jealousy an issue in general?

With Renan, he: 1. doesn't know any of Dorian's exes, 2. doesn't hear much about said exes, and 3. knows that at least one of his own past relationships was far more serious than any of Dorian's, but hasn't left him with any hangups, so, overall, he's not that fussed about Dorian's exes. He also isn't particularly jealous; as long as Dorian doesn't seem to be reciprocating flirting in earnest, he chooses not to worry. Dorian's just... like that. However, if he's already feeling insecure or as though his trust has been violated, he'd probably be more sensitive about it. Dorian, on the other hand, gets a fair bit more jealous, both about others flirting with Renan and about Renan's exes. The exes bit is largely because Renan only tells him about them on a need-to-know basis, and some worried part of Dorian's mind can't help but wonder if this is because Renan has reason to hide them, rather than it just being against Renan's nature to share intimate details about other people. BLU spoilers under the cut ->

Ty for the tags @maagisterpavus and @cheaploaf! Tagging @transscr0ogetruther and @in-the-drowning-deep if you two haven't done it & would like to fill one out :^)

also using this to give peeks at 2 of the drawings I'll be posting for Dorian week 👁👁 that lil halla statuette is part of maybe one of the best things i've drawn in years

and um. don't worry about the song choices! it's fine everything is fine

Blank below the cut!